120. To Preserve His Sanity, Part VII

MY COUSIN WAS APPREHENSIVE AS he stared at me, it was apparent. "A void of darkness and death?" He gulped, looking sick. "Let me guess, my dad and Ryan will die first, and I'll die later?"

I gave him an empathic smile but said nothing, which was enough for him. He bit his lip that began to tremble and I saw as his eyes got watery—his breathing was unsteady.

"Was it caused by one of my uncles?" Technically, yes.

"They ordered it, and the King's bastard did it," when he heard that, he scoffed.

Looking from his hands to my eyes, I saw the burning anger in them. "I've suspected that the asshole who was always around us, was actually that fucker's bastard. But I wasn't sure, after all, suggesting such a thing about my uncle would be an offense to Lucas, his husband!" He chuckled sarcastically, "It's Levi, isn't it?"

So, he knows! "Yes."

"What happened? I need to know, Nat! When it would happen!" There it is, the fire in his eyes, the gleam that ignited his desire for revenge that brought him down to my level.

Sigh. "Before I say anything, you have to promise to let me help you!"

"How?" He growled exasperated.

"You can't do anything against them, Cass. That will destroy you and taint how your dad desired you to be. It'll make you the same as those who hurt you, and for nothing!" He clenched his jaw. "In short, I'll be your executioner when the time comes. I already have a plan on how to save uncle Martin, Ryan, and you. As well as how can I end the lives of those who are scheming to kill you and your family!"

Cass looked unsure, and more than anything, insecure. "Why? I know we get along with each other, by why would you taint your purity and do such a job for me?"

The sad smile that appeared on my lips caught him off guard, and it was genuine. "Look, cousin, no one has a worse future than I had, believe me. And I'm everything but pure. My soul is tainted beyond salvation, and I don't plan on such a thing either. I've killed many people, so, killing isn't a problem at all, but rather a solution. I need this, alright? I need to use this as an excuse to liberate all the anger and desire for blood that has been consuming me. Besides, they would eventually target me as well, it would be beneficial to me to kill them."

I took a deep breath, feeling the tears burning my eyes. {"Kid..."} He seemed concerned.

I'm alright, Chaos. I'll be fine.

"To be honest with you, Cass," I began, looking at him, not bothering to hide my pain. "If you go down on the dark path, as you would, you will end up like me. Broken, hopeless, hunted by your ghosts, consume by guilty, driven by revenge, not having the slightest desire to stay alive... I do not wish to see you like me, dear. Especially when I can avoid that from happening!"

When he looked at me, he saw me for who I am now. "How did you end up like this, Nat?" I could feel the genuine worry in his voice. "Who hurt you like this?"

"Everybody," I looked down at my hands. "And myself."

He got up and came to hug me, and I cried. I cried like I hadn't cried in years. Not caring about my pride, or about how I could regret showing such a weakness afterward. Cass is family, and I feel a little relaxed to be able to count on him like this. Even if I didn't explain everything in detail to him, he understood me.

Caressing my hair, he holds me tighter, "I'm sorry. For everyone that hurt you, I'm so sorry! You always deserved the world and all the good in it, and all you received was their hatred. You were naive, innocent, and pure, and they broke you until you lost yourself and your hope in the way. If I could change that, I would!" His words made me cry even more. He took a step back and held my face for me to look at him. "If I let you help me, will you feel better? Will it give you a little bit of peace?"

When I nodded, he hugged me again. "Alright, I promise in the name of my dad and brother, I'll let you help me with all of this," I felt relieved and hugged him tighter, making him giggle. "What's your plan, smartass?" He asked after letting me go.

{"Are you okay?"} His calm tone didn't mask his worry.

I'm better now.

"It'll all happen in four years and a half," I'll be eighteen. "When the time comes, I'll have control over my magic. Not only that, but thanks to the arrangements I'm taking care of now, I'll also have a lot of economic and social power until then. Which means I'll be able to help you with all of my power."

We sat down again, "Fifty-four months... It's a lot of time. In the Calendar of your Empire, today's July 16th of the year 279, then it'll be around winter of the year 283!"

"Precisely. End of the year 283, beginning of 284!" I'll never forget that because it was around my 18th birthday, and I felt hollow when I heard of it, even if I couldn't understand it at the time because of Dalilah's manipulations, now I understand why I felt so sick when it happened. "You are friends with Queen Larissa Rosalyn, right?"

He seemed confused by my question about the famous Gold Queen, but nodded, regardless. "I am!"

Good. "Can you trust her?"

"Yes!" He answered convicted.

My plan will work! "Then, I need you to make her request that your father and your brother go spend time with her. Under the reason of her needing him for some research that would need his intelligence service," once Cass' family is responsible for the intelligence service in the White-Wood Kingdom, thanks to their outstanding telepathy! "And ask her to keep them there for about five years. It'll be time enough for us to resolve everything! While I'll take care of them, you will stay and take care of your family's territory and business while uncle Martin isn't around."

{"That's a good plan. But your cousin needs to have some protection, because if they kill him, it'll all go to waste, right?"} Yes, because I need him to be King.

And about the protection issues, I came prepared.

"You really thought of everything," he smiled at me. "I don't know how to thank you!"

"Thank me after I make you King," then I took a pair of earrings, four rings, two bracelets, and a necklace from the pocket in my ice-blue dress, and gave it to him. "I thought of the slight possibility of meeting any of you here, so I came prepared. All of these jewels have small emeralds to match your eyes, as well as uncle Martin's and Ryan's. They have a strong protection type of magic, that will protect you from any kind of mind magic, and will also create gravity and sound barrier around you, that will be activated if someone attacks you! So, do not take them in any circumstances, even bathing, stay with them!"

His eyes widened in surprise. "Since when, exactly, did you begin to prepare for all of this?"

"Twelve days ago, when the visions started," when I came back. "Use two rings, one in each hand, the pair of earrings, and one of the bracelets. Uncle and your brother will be safer in the Rosalyn Kingdom, but as you will stay in the snakes' zone, you will have to protect yourself!"

"How did you know I am able to use earrings if last time I hadn't taken care of that yet?"

I smiled, "The visions!"

"Alright, I'll protect myself. Thank you for what you are doing, my dad and Ryan will be grateful to you forever," that made me blush.

"I hope I'll meet them again when all of this is taken care of!"

"So do I, they love you like a daughter and a sister," how adorable. "Ryan has a crush on you since he met you the first time. After this, you will become his idol forever," I giggled.

"Cute! Now, let's eat. I get hungry when I cry," to that, Chaos chuckled.

{"You get hungry at any moment, human, not just when you cry,"} it's better to see him mocking me and hear him all worried about me. It gives goosebumps.

Smiling softly and feeling relieved, we got back to eating our dinner.