295 Nesiara's Exam part 2
Nesiara was stuck with Jeanne for ten years now as she couldn't pass her exam not knowing why as she lashed out against the ground while shouting, "Why can't I leave this place!"
"You know why you are still here. It is because you haven't completely forgiven yourself for something that has happened in the past," says Jeanne trying to calm Nesiara down.
"But I went through everything that I have been holding inside of me. Why am I still not able to advance," says Nesiara as Jeanne rubs her back before helping her stand again.
"Not everything," says Jeanne knowing that Nesiara still has one thing that she hasn't even touched since she buried it deep inside of her mind and heart.
"What is it that I still have on my mind not allowing me to pass this exam?" asks Nesiara helpless as Jeanne looked at her and sighs.
"You know it very well," says Jeanne as she looked at her seriously as Nesiara looked at Jeanne confused when Jeanne says, "You have buried it deep inside yourself for many years. It is time that you face that trauma to walk stronger out of it."
"What is it?" asks Nesiara as Jeanne petted her head.
"John's betrayal," says Jeanne as Nesiara looked confused at her.
"But I already went through it," says Nesiara as Jeanne shakes her head.
"Avoiding something is not going through it but ignoring it. And you ignored it for long enough, don't you think so," says Jeanne as she helped Nesiara sit down on a stool.
"Why should I forgive myself for something I didn't even commit in the first place!" shouts Nesiara as Jeanne shakes her head.
"That is what we always say when faced with something we don't want to accept. 'It was someone else fault.' All just excuses we tell ourselves to blame it on someone else," says Jeanne looking at Nesiara who was fighting herself.
"You want me to suffer through it again!" shouts Nesiara angry as Jeanne became serious.
"Life is suffering. We need to suffer so we can rise out of it and grow stronger from it. But to do so we need to face it head-on and find the strength to stand against it," says Jeanne seriously as she sees tears forming in Nesiara's eyes.
"It was because I was never too serious about everything. He was always more mature than me even now I am still the same sometimes," says Nesiara knowing herself best as she sometimes returns to be her younger self being reckless just to have fun.
"*sighs* You really think that is the reason for him to leave you behind. Look deeper inside the pain and suffering you are feeling at the moment," says Jeanne as she kneels on the ground before Nesiara.
Nesiara closes her eyes seeing her worst nightmare again which was John betraying her when Jeanne asks, "What were you feeling when it happened?"
"I felt like someone ripped my most important thing out of my chest," says Nesiara as Jeanne smiles.
"It seems you were in love with John way earlier than you think if you felt that when he turned his back to you and the others," says Jeanne with a smile on her face.
"Tell me more," says Jeanne encouraging Nesiara to share more of her feelings with her.
"I felt abandoned and worthless when it happened because I couldn't stop him from going," says Nesiara as Jeanne petted her head.
"What will you do if it happens again?" asks Jeanne as Nesiara began to radiate a scary aura.
"I will fucking kill my husband," says Nesiara in a cold tone which made Jeanne break out in laughter.
"Meditate on it and try to forgive yourself for being weak back then and you should be able to arrive before the next and last test," says Jeanne as she knew that Nesiara would be able to leave now.
Nesiara began to meditate about her current feelings not knowing that it took her two more years before she started with a clean slate when Jeanne hugs her.
Nesiara felt warmth in her chest when Jeanne says, "You have finally done it. Now only my sister awaits you. Good luck."
Jeanne then disappears and the environment changed again. Nesiara was standing on black sand finding herself in a dune with a black castle in front of her.
She walks towards the castle while looking around finding out that the sky was black with stars shining down upon her when she reached the castle she knocked on its gates.
The gates open and she walks for a bit getting the feeling she was there before when she sees a woman with long black hair and black eyes.
"You have finally arrived, Nesiara Wyrm. Or should I call you Nesiara Crownguard?. It is all the same to me," says the woman when Nesiara looks around.
"We are in the Nothingness," says Nesiara as the woman walks forward.
"Why shouldn't we? It is our ancestral home," says the woman as she looked at Nesiara and she could see that she let go of the shackles that were holding her back.
"It seems you let go of your past to face the future," says the woman as she walked towards Nesiara.
"You must be also part of my family or you wouldn't have said called this place our ancestral home," says Nesiara as the woman smiles at her.
"Yes, I am Shura's wife and the Goddess of Life and Death, Lorena Death," says Lorena as she walks around Nesiara taking a good look at her.
"We don't have much time. I already wasted twelve years on the second exam to get here and I don't want to waste more time so tell me, what is my last exam?" says Nesiara as she didn't want to waste more time.
"It is quite simple, what are the duties and responsibilities as well as the powers of a Goddess of Life and Death. Once you have found out you will have passed this last exam," says Lorena as Nesiara looked at Lorena confused.
"Isn't that too simple? The Goddess of Life and Death is someone responsible for the souls all over the Multiverse and her powers should be the control over them as well," says Nesiara as Lorena holds her face while shaking her head.
"That is too simple of an answer and not even a fracture of our duty and powers," says Lorena as she moves her hand in the direction of Nesiara before she twists her hand towards the right.
Nesiara began to age rapidly making Nesiara look her age until Lorena stopped and she says, "I can do much more than this but your name doesn't stand in the Book of Life and Death. You will be working as a normal Reaper for a hundred years. It should give you a view of the tip of the iceberg of the power."
Lorena then twists her hand to the left turning Nesiara's youth back when Nesiara asks, "How am I going to work as a Reaper when I am in an illusion?"
"Don't worry about that, I wouldn't have told you that without having something in mind," says Lorena as she snapped her fingers disappearing while the environment changed.
Nesiara found herself in a city and a book in her hand when she hears Lorena's voice, "You will be guiding all souls recorded on your book without exception towards the Underworld."
"Which Souls? I don't see anyone around he-," says Nesiara when suddenly people appeared around here.
They ignored her as they went and did their usual daily activities when Lorena says, "Do your duty until you find your answer."
"Fine," says Nesiara as she opened the book looking at the first name on the list.
"Bianca Leo, 6 years old," says Nesiara surprised when she looks into the sky angry.
"Are you kidding me? She is just a child," says Nesiara as she didn't want to reap the person in her book.
"We don't decide who we have to reap. We only do our work as will you," says Lorena as Nesiara looked at the sky.
"And what if I don't do it?" asks Nesiara angry.
"You find out soon enough what happens if we don't follow the natural order," says Lorena in a warning tone as Nesiara flinched for a moment.
She left to look for the child she needed to reap by following the book's direction. Nesiara found herself in a hospital finding a cheerful girl reading a book but she had a bald head and a needle in her arm while a fluid was entering her body.
"She is just sick. We could heal her and-," says Nesiara when Lorena interrupts her.
"And bring chaos to the order. Our job is to keep the balance and keep the beauty of Life," says Lorena to Nesiara reprimanding her.
"I won't collect her soul," says Nesiara angry as Lorena sighs.
"Then you will be responsible for the consequences that will follow if you don't reap her soul before midnight," says Lorena as Nesiara looked at the girl before looking at the reception.
Nesiara left the hospital with the book. It soon became midnight and Nesiara smiled since nothing happened when she felt an earthquake and something sinister coming from the direction of the hospital.
She rushes towards the hospital and finds the hospital completely destroyed from the earthquake she finds two people under some rocks who were dead.
"What happened?" asks Nesiara herself as Lorena now appears beside her.
"The Balance claimed her soul and all the others were collateral damage because you didn't do your job," says Lorena angry at Nesiara.
"The Balance?" asks Nesiara as Lorena nods.
"We are the Keeper of the Balance between Life and Death. If a soul isn't collected by a Reaper the Balance will claim it for him or her," says Lorena explaining it to Nesiara as she looked sad at the hospital.
"How many people have you just killed by not claiming one soul? You can call yourself lucky that it was only a small hospital. You have most likely killed two-hundred people which still had a future before them," says Lorena looking at it.
"I killed all of them?" asks Nesiara guilty about what happened.
"A Reaper has a duty to fulfill even if he or she doesn't like to do it. Do you think I loved to kill my adopted sons over and over again," says Lorena looking at Nesiara when she continues, "Or Abigail killing her whole family over and over again."
"No, I don't think so," says Nesiara as Lorena nods.
"We do what we must to keep the Balance. And you will need to learn that," says Lorena as she puts her hand on Nesiara's shoulder before she says, "The next name on the list. Go and remember what happens if you don't reap the soul."
"Yes," says Nesiara sadly as she opened the book looking at the next name on the page before leaving to reap it.
