Chapter One

I had a brief moment to hold my breath before my surfboard flipped over the top of me, smacking me headfirst into the water. Literally.

The waves toppled over my board and sent my body into a dizzying craze as I tried to reach the surface. Up was down and down was up. I pushed panic down deep into my gut as I clenched my lips together, swimming aggressively towards the direction I thought might be air.

My head burst through the surface of the water and I gasped for relief before another wave pummeled me. This time, I wasn’t as disoriented. I was calmer. Smarter. I opened my eyes for a split second under the water, just so I could see the next wave coming. I waited for it to break before bounding to the surface and diving onto my surfboard.

I didn’t need to look to know my dad was penning my every move down. His clipboard probably had a hole in it by how many notes he had for me. I’ll admit, today was not my day.

The next wave came quickly and I decided to go for it. I paddled for a moment before the surfboard got enough momentum, then I launched to my feet. I was sturdy. I was calm. I was ready.

The wave began to spiral as I darted under the curl. My heart raced as the tunnel folded in and just before the water enclosed me, I made it. The fresh air greeted me as a smile spread across my lips. My speed was good on that one at least.

However, my smile didn’t last long. As I rode the wave closer to shore, I noticed my father’s expression; his features tight, his eyebrows furrowed, and his mouth in a line.

Not good enough.

As I approached the shore, I dipped into the water, feeling the wet sand between my toes before dragging my surfboard across the warm, dry sand. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as I threw my surfboard down at my father’s feet. He hardly looked up at me as his fingers scribbled across his clipboard. I crossed my arms and waited, impatiently tapping my foot.

“Well?” I asked after several moments of insufferable silence. My hands sat securely fisted on my hips. If he had something to say, he might as well just come out with it.

“It was entertaining to watch, I’ll give you that.” He still refused to meet me in the eyes.

I groaned, pulling at my matted, wet hair and twisted it tightly. Water secreted from every strand, sand falling out along with it.

“It’s like I’m getting worse! How is this even possible? We’ve been training endlessly!” I spun around, refusing to look at my father anymore. I wasn’t frustrated with him, I was frustrated with myself. I knew what I was capable of and the way I’ve been riding recently is not up to my standard, not to mention my dad’s standard. Why have I been struggling so much with something I completely love?

“Honestly, I don’t know,” my dad said, tapping his pen against the clipboard in a steady rhythm. “Something’s changed in you. It’s like you’re not taking this seriously. You’re lacking motivation. I mean, do you really want this title, Brooke?”

My dad’s harsh words lashed at my throat. My cheeks flushed with annoyance. I knew he was right, but I didn’t have an answer for him. Still, hearing him say it made me that much more upset.

“Yes,” I mumbled.

“Then you need to start acting like it.” My dad reached for his duffel bag and threw it around his shoulder. For the first time tonight, his face softened for a moment as he finally met me in the eyes. He reached a handout and gently squeezed my shoulder. The slightest of smiles escaped his mouth. So slight no one else would have noticed it. No one except for people close to him.

“I’ll see you at home,” he said and walked down the sidewalk towards our house.

I let out a long sigh as I dragged my feet through the warm sand back to the ocean. I felt unfinished with my run today. I needed some alone time; just me, my board, and the water.

The water was calming. Sunset would be momentarily and the beach would most likely become littered with families and couple’s trying to soak up the last bit of Hawaiian sun they can before the day’s end. I was trying to get one last good wave.

I paddled out to the blue world, drifting farther and farther away from the shore, dipping under the white water to avoid the breaking waves. Once I passed a certain point, the breaking waves died and there was a steady rhythm to the water that made me feel at home. The rise and fall motion lulled me into focus. My mind drifted from a whirlwind of uncertainty to nothing but here and now: the waves and me.

I inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with oxygen, and lunged into an aggressive paddle. The wave I was eyeing was quickly approaching behind me and I paddled faster. The more speed I could get, the more opportunity I had.

I began to feel the water carrying my board from behind and I rose to my feet with more control than I had shown all day. It was graceful, smooth, and the wave was powerful, pushing me at full force towards the shore. Soaring across the watery plain, it gave me the adrenaline and confidence I needed today. This is why I want to win this competition so badly. This is why I need to push myself.

I loved surfing. I always have and always will. It’s not just a hobby, it’s a passion. It makes me feel like I’m weightless, floating across the water with speed. It’s something that has always been apart of my life and I was lucky to have the support and knowledge from my family to be successful at it.

I needed to win this competition to prove to myself that I am a good surfer. No — not a good surfer, a professional surfer.

My mouth toyed into a smirk as I kicked the surfboard into the waves, adding more difficulty and technique to the run. I continued to play with the wave, a game of give-and-take before the water caught up.

The white water was catching up to my board and began to enclose me. The tunnel began to form, threatening to pull my surfboard underwater with just one small mistake. The tunnel got more narrow and the vision of the shore got smaller and smaller. I took a quick breath as I crouched, trying to gain momentum. Just before I thought it was too late, the surfboard caught it’s speed and darted out of the tunnel. The fresh air overwhelmed me as the wave died down and my surfboard rode gracefully towards the shore.

I heard applause start from the shoreline.

“Go, Brooke!” my best friend hollered. Amy waded into the water, her airy, white pants getting wet around the ankles.

I shook my head as my cheeks flushed, but I couldn’t avoid the smile that stretched across my face. That was a great run. I was secretly glad that someone witnessed it.

“What are you doing here?” I laughed as I snatched my surfboard out of the water and wandered towards the girl in white. “I thought you’d still be on the plane?”

Amy shrugged and took a seat on the sand, seemingly unfazed of getting her white pants dirty. I sat next to her. We both faced the now-setting sun. It caught the entire horizon on fire in a blaze of colors.

“We got back a little early,” she shrugged. Amy’s grandma is a bit of a daredevil and decided to take her and her brother to Africa for a “grandchildren bonding experience,” which Amy was heavily opposed to. But of course, she went anyways. Apparently, they even went bungee jumping.

“Africa was amazing?” I questioned, already knowing the answer, but her eyes lit up anyways.

“Amazing! We saw lions, elephants, giraffes…you name it, we saw it!” Amy smiled, her dark hair sitting in tight curls down her back.

“And bungee jumping?”

“Oh, we have to do it someday together. It was the craziest thing!” She mused. “Still can’t believe my grandma didn’t have a heart attack. Honestly, Preston and I are convinced that she’s faking being seventy. This woman is crazy!”

I chuckled at the thought of Amy’s grandma bungee jumping. There was a part of me that wished I was close to my grandparents because of the way Amy talks of her grandma. Sometimes I wonder if Amy’s closer to her grandma than her own mother.

“Anyways, I’m sure you’ve seen enough about my trip on social media. How was practice today?” She asked.

I gnawed on my lip and shrugged. I’m sure the last thing Amy wants to talk about is my boring surfing practice. It was honestly the last thing I wanted to talk about as well.

“It was fine,” I said, deciding to keep it short and simple. “My dad got frustrated with me, but what else is new?”

“When is the surfing competition?” Amy asked.

“Like a month away? I’m not too worried about it, but apparently, he is.” I hesitated, looking at Amy to gauge her interest. Surprisingly, she looked concerned. I sighed.

“He thinks I’m not taking this seriously enough.”

“Do you feel like you’re not taking it seriously?” She asked.

The question was a lot more complicated than a simple yes or no. I was taking it seriously. Winning this surfing competition is my way into Pepperdine University. California has always been a dream for me and Pepperdine provided the schooling I wanted while allowing me to continue surfing. The only way I was getting money for that would be through a scholarship.

On the other hand, there was a part of me not fully invested in pushing myself as far as I needed to go to win. I was struggling to figure out what wasn’t connecting. The motivation is there, but why am I lacking effort? Am I getting burnt out?

“Yes,” I said, deciding a simple yes or no would have to suffice for now. I was not going to sit here and expel this internal conflict on Amy right after her vacation.

“Good.” Amy nodded. “ I do understand why he’s pushing you so hard. You’re good, Brooke. Surfing is a god-gifted talent for you. You were born to be on the water. This competition means a lot to you…and to your dad.”

Ah, there it was. My father: ex-surfing coach and determined to make his daughter into the prodigy he always wished he could have been. There’s nothing like the pressure of having your dream and your parent’s dream alining. If it’s not achieved, it’s double the disappointment. The thought of losing this competition and not getting into Pepperdine was heartbreaking. The thought of disappointing my father was even worse.

“Yeah, I guess,” I shrugged the conversation away. I didn’t want to think about the competition anymore.

“So, are we hanging out tomorrow?” Amy asked, catching my drift.

“Yeah, we can. After surfing lessons, of course,” I rolled my eyes, but Amy laughed. She was used to this sort of stipulation from being friends for as long as we have been. Everything comes after surfing.

“Of course,” she winked. “We’re for sure going to the Boardwalk tomorrow! Since it’s the first day of school, you know everyone’s going to be there.”

My stomach turned. The first day of school with the combined stress of the Boardwalk made me nauseous. I wasn’t too much of a people person, but I was a people pleaser. If Amy wanted to do the Boardwalk that badly, I would go…but I wouldn’t necessarily be enthused about it.

“Alright,” I mumbled. I rose to my feet and snatched my surfboard from the sand. The sky shimmered and morphed from a fiery blaze to a melted abyss. The stars were beginning to come into view, which meant my mother would be beginning to worry any minute.

“Let’s head back. I need some food in me,” I said as my stomach rumbled.

“Can I come by for dinner? And…maybe stay the night? I don’t feel like being around my family right now. I was with my brother for the past three weeks and I honestly don’t know how I lasted that long without committing murder.” Amy rolled her eyes. She has an interesting relationship with her brother. They aren’t the closest of siblings, but they have each other’s backs when needed.

“Sure,” I smirked. “Only if you carry my bag.”

“Deal,” she laughed as she hoisted the large duffel bag over her shoulders before running after me towards the sidewalk.