Chapter 1

Each time I close my eyes at night, I meet this boy who I cannot resist. This dream began since I was a little girl. I liked him so much that I promised to marry him when I grow up. He promised to marry me too, and we sealed it with a blood oath. I told my grandmother that I met a boy in my dream. But I cannot recall his face or name. All I remembered were my powerful emotions for him.

She had a spiritual definition for these dreams of mine. She called them visitations from my spiritual husband. In my culture, your relationship or marriage life is heading for doom once you have a spiritual husband. Relationships and marriages would collapse because of trivial misunderstandings, and the couple never understands why they let their relationship crash.

The spirit husband opposes your attempts to fall in love with anyone else. Misfortunes await you at every turn as long as he is in your life. Most of the women in my family encounter spiritual husbands than most because we can communicate with spirits. She said I needed an exorcism to get rid of the evil spirit I promised myself to, or he would destroy my future.

I recall she began saying incantations and bathing me with extra virgin coconut oil. She also mandated that I break up with him if he appears in my dream again. I lied to grandma that I did as she instructed. I used to look forward to my dreams because my nights were more exciting than my day. He began making love to me from the night I turned 18. He makes love to me every night, but I am alone in my bed when I wake up. He left wanting companionship that does not end when I open my eyes every morning.

Grandma warned me of the repercussions of him being there in my dreams. She was right. Each time I begin a new relationship, confusion sets in without explanation, and it ends. I am at the point where my dreams have become nightmares. I am so powerless that I allow this boy to get between my legs with me, even though I no longer desired to make love to him. How do I end this nightmare?

I had only one goal when I went to bed last night. I must end it with him. He showed up, looking more handsome than I ever could imagine him to be. I forced myself to remember how miserable he had caused my actual life to be. I gathered my willpower and strength and pushed him off me.

"Why did you push me away?" He asked me.

"I am sick and tired of this. You are not real. You are just a spirit who stole my life from me since I was a child. You come to me and make me promise to love you, but you are never beside me when I awake. Nothing works out for me because of my commitment to you. Please stop invading my nights. I want you to stop coming into my dreams."

"Are you trying to leave me? How can you do that to me knowing how much I love you?"

"I love you, but you only bring me misfortune and hurt. I want this to end. I want to be happy."

"Do you think you are the only one suffering? Do you think I do not hurt when I wake up without you beside me? Nothing works out for me in the actual world too. I will rather suffer with you in my life than lose you. You are my only cause of joy."

"I am sorry, but I cannot do this anymore. It is unfair to us. I cannot find you because I do not remember you when I wake up, and neither can I remember your name. You have you cannot remember who I am when you awake from your dreams. It proves what we have is evil."

"Please do not give up on me. Give me more time. I will try my best to remember your name when I wake up, and I will find you."

"You have been saying that since I met you, but here we are. I can't do this anymore. I deserve love from my world, just as you do. Goodbye."

"No! I won't let you leave me. I cannot live without you. Please do not leave me."

"Goodbye. I wish you a lifetime of happiness just as I wish for myself."

I ran from him, and he chased me through deserts, oceans, and mountains until I am on the cliff of the tallest mountain. I will fall if I take another step.

"Stop chasing me, or I will jump."

"You hate me that much? You will willingly die than be with me?"

"That is right. I rather die than continue this way."

"Jump then. We will die together."