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THE SIMP

Tittle: The Simp by Rhoda Andrian. Everyone has a story to tell: like how you fell off your bike in third grade, or how you failed a math test and got grounded for a week. I also have a story to tell. Mine may not be about failed tests or my mother calling me a nuisance right when I hit puberty. Mine delves deeper into the realms of the heart—a story of love, pain, ache, and change. A story with an indeterminate future, but one I speculate will be formidable and, without a doubt, fruitful. But the question is, can an imperfect past pave the way for a perfect future? Then Hayzen knew her name, he did. He knew so well, she loved milkshakes and enjoyed cleaning on weekends. He noticed she had friends but seldom had any male companions, which he quite cherished. As an observer, he was drawn into a carousel of pursuit. Thus, what started as an innocent fascination soon became his beautiful mistake, his aching dread, and his fearful endeavor. What becomes of him? Now Five years later, Hayzen has grown into the man he once dreamed of being. He works at a prestigious hospital he once only imagined, located near the shores of the Pacific Ocean in San Francisco. Yet, his past continues to cast shadows on his future. The beautiful mistake and aching dread of his youth still haunt him. His embrace of nonchalance, his fear of emotional vulnerability, and his yearning to feel again create a profound inner conflict. Can he love again? Can the beautiful mistake become the most beautiful blessing? And can he finally accept the vulnerability that comes with love?

Rhoda_Andrian · Urban
Not enough ratings
70 Chs

CHAPTER 18 (THEN)

Love is one of the most beautiful things in the world.

And truth is, I was in love. 

One thing I know I have said more than once, so I write again: I was in love.

Days had passed. 

Weeks had kissed goodbye. 

Exams had started, and they had already ended. 

So, because of everything.., I wanted today to surprise Kate with one of her favorite meals…, I was lazy at cooking, but once I got myself in there I knew what to do.

 She liked yoghurt, of course, I had bought…, along with some well-cooked turkey and chicken in addition to rice. She loved them a little bit spicy.

'a little bit spicy' she always told the chefs

Everything was set. I mean, I had set everything well. 

With my chemist job, I had saved up some amount of money and bought a dining table, in addition to its well-shaped chairs, so I hoped she saw my hard work.

With everything set, the food, and everything in addition to the flower vase I had bought, the itch came in. 

The itch to call her. 

The itch to ask her where she was. It was, of course, almost eight at night, and she still had not texted or called me. 

I wondered where she was. 

Then my phone buzzed, and I quickly checked.

'Billy??' I ignored it.

Again, it buzzed. New number? So I just answered.

"Yes?" I started.

"Open the door," it stated, "it's Funky."

"My door?" I asked, of course, in confusion of what was happening.

"Yeah," he stated, and then ended the call, as a knock followed on my door. It seemed to be the longest distance I ever took from the living room of this one bedroom-roomed house to the door. In haste, I opened it, as a feeble person fell inside as if trying her hardest to crawl inside.

"Kate?" I stated, as I knelt down, and as Funky entered the house. 

Funky was always a respectful man. He removed his shoes and then helped me with Kate, despite my shruggings since I did not want him helping me. 

Then we laid the girl on the couch, as I went for a bedcover to cover her up.

She wore some booty shorts, white girlish sneakers, a little messed-up makeup. I had currently done her nails, and her sparkling hair was a bit undone as if she had let someone run her hand on them a thousand time, maybe from the dragging and carrying. 

She was steadily sleeping. 

She was drunk. 

One thing that broke my heart always about her.

She was one fond drug addict. Once anyone called her for a drink, she would literally leave anything just to enjoy herself. Of course, today was the end-semester's party of the school's bigwigs. That's why Funky was there.

"I will leave," Funky stated, and my attention shifted to him.

"What happened?" I asked in a low tone, as I took him to the balcony, maybe to have a conversation.

"A little drink. She's gonna have a hangover. Prepare her some milk and some ice and buy her some pain killers..," he stated, straight looking at me.

"You know not much about her," I stated.

"Well, I do. And you should take care of her. If you can't..." Funky seemed to be also out of it. His behavior seemed a little bit off. He looked at me as if he was taking a step back from hitting me.

"You know nothing. You don't have to tell me what I should do and don't to my girl," I stated.

"To your girl?" he asked, smirking around, and this... hell, this bruised my ego. This type of laughing ruined all the mood in me. I was never the type who did violence.., but who the hell laughs at you when you talk about your girlfriend.., that's total disrespect. 

"What did you just do?" I asked.., but he just shrugged. 

"Dude, get the fuck out of my apartment," I stated, clenching my jaw, as one of my hands held tightly onto the rails that were now ice-cold.

"I'm not leaving till I know she's okay with you," he stated, and I stepped back, shaking my head.

"Why... why..." my mind now even decided to ask one question, 'why was he like this?' And in little to no amount of time left, I found my fist kissing the right side of Funky's jawline as he jumped onto me, suddenly straddling me onto the floor.

The reason we were fighting... well, no real reason. There were reasons I could give:

First, he made me feel not man enough. 

Second, he seemed like a competitor. 

Third, he appeared cocky pretending to know a lot about Kate. 

Fourth, I just wanted to punch his face. 

Fifth, I hated feeling worthless with Kate being the topic. 

Sixth, he had something with Ka...

"She's expecting!!!" Funky stated out of nowhere, stopping me from continuing to thrash his pretty face. My fist was still clenched in the air as I, in frustration, let go of his lengthy t-shirt and stood up from wherever we were, not even realizing the blood on both of us.

"What do you mean?" I asked again.

"Yeah, dude, man up," he stated, shoving me against the wall with one hand, then paving his way outside. I followed him to close the door.., am sure I banged the door.., and sat right by it.

"Was she really?" I questioned myself. Why would she really be and tell Funky, and not me? I didn't notice... What do I tell my mother? But that doesn't matter... I questioned a lot.

So I lazily stood from the dirty floor, went and washed my stinging face to at least wipe away the blood, removed the shirt I wore, and went to where the girl peacefully slept.

"Kate, why didn't you tell me?" I started talking. I knew she was asleep, but I just needed to at least question. "You should have at least told me. You know, I am not that evil. I do not refuse my responsibility. I am to be a doctor. I am working at a chemist. We will have a good future. You, the baby, I. Damn, I am just sad you told that dude. I don't like him, Love. He is my course mate but..."

"I ju..,uussst just.. ,tested today... it became positive," she stated, shifting her position.

"You tested? You did not tell me? You told Funky...? Are you serious?"

"He just found me drinking," she added…paused, then a little opened her eyes a little bit.., "I don't want the baby."

"What... I will take care of you all, love. You both and me, perfect family. We can start with a YouTube channel, grow a YouTube, as I strengthen my medical roots," I added, hoping she would reply. I was now not sure if she was sleeping or just lying pretending she was asleep.

"I wanted to tell you. I missed two times, but I needed to be sure…," she stated. "I love you, Hayzen. I just... you make me happy…, but this.., its fast." And I sighed as I went near her, hugging her tightly. "We should go to sleep... we should go to sleep. And the baby should not take in intoxicated drugs... don't drink ever again," I stated, carrying her to the bed, changing into something good, and lying beside her.

Truth was, of everything I anticipated, having a child was never something on my mind. 

Truth was, of everything I hated, having a child with Kate was never something I would hate.

My mind revolved even after switching off the lights. 

It became bizarre and it became the start of my impeccable darkness. 

The night was sure dark, and I looked at Kate, as the sweet alcohol smell coming from her embraced my nostrils.., she made any alcohol smell sweet to me, and I imagined her stomach, the being inside of her, my being... my being. 

I reviewed, I thought, I wondered, and I just sighed. 

But I loved her, and she was the only thing that made me happy.

"Tomorrow, I will start looking for a voluntary job in one of the large hospitals, and then on weekends, I will be taking her to the clinic to check on the well-being of the baby, especially the fact that she had been drinking. 

I wonder if she would be a boy or a girl... 

Will she look like me, or will he look like her? Will he have my mustache?" I laughed at the se thoughts. 

I wondered how my mother would act on the news. I guess I should first take her to my mum. God, I am going to be a father." These were the thoughts my mind replayed over and over again as if in repeat. 

Kate was near me, lying next to me as her hand embraced my chest and her head on the pillow.

 I had the world already. 

With her here

This was the world. 

I was happy, though so fast. I knew I was ready. 

Any man is always ready for a woman he loves. 

I just sighed all through, as little to no sleep embraced me.

 "I think we should retest so that I can believe... But she would think I was questioning things... No. I don't know. 

I was happy. 

But I was scared. 

But it was Kate. 

It is Kate Hayzen.

 It is Kate," I told myself a thousand times. 

But at the back of my mind, I knew. I knew this meant more than it is stating and saying the word Kate. 

I never got to have a father. Never got to experience what having a father feels like. I ain't ever make this baby lack," I stated as I stared at Kate. I did not even know the current time. 

My mind was fogging up with both joy, anxiety, and fear. 

But it was Kate, my only strength.

 It was Kate.

Enjoy...,

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