Chapter 9: Staff meeting

Severus Snape detested staff meetings. They were nothing more than an opportunity for the other teachers and house heads to brag about their favorites and to complain about the troublemakers that they couldn't control. He barely had any trouble, even from the Weasley twins. Then again, Severus gave the children no room to maneuver with him. He knew that he was hated for it, but frankly, he didn't give a damn.

He zoned out Pomona's jabbering and thought about what he had to tell Albus. Potter had come to him the night before, and hadn't that been a fun conversation?

' What was Albus thinking? Dropping him off like that. At Petunia's house, no less'.

As for the other things Potter had told him, he couldn't really care. He knew the Gryffindors reviled him and would merrily suspect him of anything, but he was irked that they knew about the stone.

And he was extremely annoyed by the other things Potter had overheard.

' All Slytherins are evil. Sometimes I wish I could show those brats why that reputation had developed. Show them why I was feared once. Show them how they had made me into a monster full of hate and rage'

To be fair, that wasn't quite true. He had always had more than an ample share of hate and rage, and the Dark Arts had been a wonderful way to express that. It had all changed when Lily died though. And it seemed it was all changing again.

Despite himself, he found that he quite liked the Potter boy. The boy was actually polite, had no preconceived ideas, and had a thirst to learn. And importantly, respected him. The previous night, after the boy had left his office Severus actually found himself smiling!

' I won James Potter. You are dead, and I am guiding your son.'

He had mused on it for hours and came to the conclusion that perhaps he was moving on. Moving on from Lily, moving on from the pit of bitterness and despair that he had wallowed in the past ten years. Of course, these thoughts had thrown him into an existential crisis. He solved it by conjuring a rabbit and crucioing it until the pitiful thing's heart burst. Always a way out of bad thoughts that.

As the meeting was coming to a close, the discussion turned, as Severus knew it would, to Harry.

"He's doing very well in my class. Top of his class" Squeaked little Filius.

"Mine as well. He's definitely making a major effort, often asks questions after class" McGonagall added.

"Yes, Mr. P-P-Potter is trying exceptionally hard. H-he is c-c-coming in first out of his whole y-y-year"

' And so on, and so forth. I doubt anyone here but I know what he has been feeling about our esteemed headmaster' Severus thought, hiding his sneer.

"Excellent, are there any further concerns that should be brought to the room as a whole?" Dumbledore asked

"None other than the fact that Cuthbert isn't here, as usual. Are you sure we can't simply get the ministry to allow an exorcism, Albus?" Minerva asked.

Dumbledore sighed. "I wish it were so simple. As much as a good History teacher would help the students, I do not wish the ministry to be involved in Hogwarts any more than they already are". Dumbledore looked around the room, and when no one had anything to say he gave a small nod.

"Very well, we shall meet again before Easter. I wish everyone a pleasant Christmas, and shall see you all at the feast"

As the staff all filed out the room, Severus remained in his seat.

' Well Albus, you wanted reports on Harry, you shall get your wish. I don't think that twinkle will still be in your eyes though'

"Severus? Something on your mind?"

"Harry came to speak to me last night, Albus"

Albus' face took on a look of immediate worry.

"Oh? What did he have to say?"

' That he detests you'

"Well, firstly he overheard some Gryffindors, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger in the library. He was reticent to say, but Weasley was trying to convince Granger that I, apparently am trying to steal something a dog is guarding"

Albus' face had a flicker of surprise cross it. Privately, Snape rejoiced. It wasn't easy to shock the old Wizard, and though he greatly respected him, he still enjoyed doing so.

' Admit it. After what Harry told you, you don't respect him nearly as much as you once did'

"That is… Interesting"

"There is more. They were also saying how all Slytherins are evil, and Harry must be the evilest because he defeated Voldemort"

Albus looked absolutely flabbergasted at that.

"What?" He asked, voice trembling.

"Some nonsense about him having to be a more powerful dark wizard in order to survive. I found it laughable, and Harry obviously knew it to be nonsense, but he despises being thought to be evil"

"That does not surprise me at all" Albus muttered, entire body giving off a serious feeling.

"Harry admits that there is some bad blood between him and the Weasley boy. Some type of argument they had on the Hogwarts express. He reiterated multiple times that Weasley has done nothing more than the occasional insult and comment"

Albus didn't say anything, lost in thought. Snape went on.

' And this is where the fun starts'

"After he left the library, upset at what he had heard, Harry ran into Hagrid"

Albus looked up sharply at that, eyes piercing Severus.

"Hagrid apparently told him that you had left him on his aunt and uncle's doorstep with a note" Severus' voice gained a touch of cold fury. "He was most upset. He says when he heard that he ran away from Hagrid and hid for hours while he wept."

Albus looked like he had been punched in the gut. He opened his mouth to say something, but Snape raised a hand and carried on talking.

"No Albus. I don't want to hear why it was the best option. It was a foolish, detestable move. Harry is extremely angry with you and rightfully so. He said he doesn't trust you at all, and I can't blame him for that. Can you Albus?"

"No. I cannot. Over Christmas break, I will try to talk to him perhaps-" but Snape interrupted again.

"He will not be here. He has been invited to the Malfoys, and is extremely excited to get away for a break"

Albus' eyes closed tightly, as if in horrible pain.

"What have I done?" He whispered to himself.

"Furthermore, he has asked me how he would go about looking to be adopted by a wizarding family"

"Perhaps that would be best," Albus said in a sorrowful voice. "Do you think he could ever reconcile with me?"

Severus looked at Albus thoughtfully.

"Perhaps. Perhaps not. I hazarded some legilemency, and his mind and emotions are a mess right now. Give him time, and perhaps" he stressed that word "He will be willing to give you a chance. Right now he would probably punch you".

"And I would deserve it"

' Yes. You would. After all, you said to me about Lily's child, you abandoned him on the street? Abandoned him to Petunia. What good did you see coming from that"

Severus got up and strode from the room. As he was closing the door he heard Albus repeating to himself once again:

"What have I done?"