Chapter 40: Of Boggarts and Butterbeers

"Hey, check this out!"

Harry turned to Blaise, who was holding the paper.

"Sirius Black spotted!" He read excitedly.

"Where?"

"It says it was near here!"

Harry carried on eating while Blaise read the article. Apparently, a muggle had spotted him near Hogsmeade and called it in. Of course, by the time the Aurors got there, Black was gone.

"Aren't you worried, Harry?" Theo asked.

"Why should I be?"

"Let me think. Hmmm. Maybe because the Dark Lord's second in command, and the first person to ever escape Azkaban is in the area? And being as you were responsible for his master's downfall, he might come after you?"

' Responsible for his downfall? If only you knew, Theo'

"Not really," Harry said, calmly smearing marmalade on another piece of toast, "I mean, we're in Hogwarts, there are Dementors everywhere-not really worries, no"

"So you're gonna go to Hogsmeade?"

"Why not? There'll be tons of people around, and I think there'll be Dementors there also. Especially if he's in the area"

"You're so brave" Pansy simpered, "I'd be so scared"

Harry frowned. Pansy had been acting really weird lately. The last few weeks, actually. Ever since she saw him outside.

' Don't think about it. Don't think about the Boggart'

Almost instinctively, he cleared his mind. It hadn't been going as well as he would want it to, his Occlumency training. Draco was doing far better at it than him. But he practiced and practiced, and Snape did say he would soon be able to move on to the next stage of training.

"You guys ready for the match? Have to keep up our winning streak"

"Of course we are" Draco answered, affronted. "We've been training so much already, and the match is only after Halloween"

"Yeah. Between that and homework, I've barely had any free time" Harry added

"Again. You chose the most intensive subjects. You don't really get to complain about the workload now, mate"

"I know, I know. And I actually like them, but still"

Pansy said something to Tracey that sounded suspiciously like "so smart"

' I definitely need to speak to that girl. Something's going on with her'

"You think Snape's still taking Defence?"

"Dunno. I mean how long could Lupin be sick for anyways?"

"Who knows? If it is him though, what are we meant to do with our werewolf essays?"

Harry and Draco shared a look at that. Snape has perhaps not so accidentally, let slip what exactly Lupin's sickness was. At first, they had been quite horrified. But eventually, they came to the conclusion that he could still be a good teacher. Especially when it comes to Dark Creatures.

"I think we should give them to him," Draco said. Harry stifled a laugh.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm sure he'll find them interesting"

' Especially when he reads what we had to write. The best ways to fight and kill a werewolf. Snape can be devious'

Defence that day saw Lupin teaching again, this time lecturing on the specifics of red caps- nasty little gnome-like creatures that enjoyed leading travelers astray, and then killing them. They would also dye their hats in their victims' blood, and the darker the hat, the more blood they had spilled.

Easy enough to fight off, particularly if you weren't stupid enough to take their directions in the first place.

After class, Lupin asked Harry to stay behind.

"So, Harry. How've you been finding the lessons?"

"Good, sir"

' Oh god, don't let him start talking about the first one we had'

"I wanted to tell you, Harry, that if you ever need to speak, I'm available. I was close friends with your father, you know"

"Thank you, sir"

"I was thinking if you wanted to know more about your parents. Well, I would be more than happy to share"

"Thank you, sir. Really. But I try not to dwell on them too much. I can never really know them"

Lupin looked at Harry with a deep sadness in his eyes.

"That could be wise" he murmured. "Nevertheless, I'm available"

"Thank you"

"And, Harry?"

Harry turned from the door, a questioning look on his face.

"When you feel ready to talk about your Boggart-"

"I don't want to talk about it"

Lupin raised a hand, gently cutting him off.

"One day, you may find yourself wanting to. When that day comes, if you wish, I will be available"

Harry left the room without replying.

' Who the hell does he think he is? I tell him I don't want to talk about it, and he just won't let it go! For fuck's sake!'

He reached the library, and donning his invisibility cloak, headed right to the restricted section.

He pulled out the book he had been reading, a heavy tome of curses, and tucked it under his cloak.

' He knew my parents, so that gives him the right to try to make decisions for me? Fuck him!'

As always, the thought of his parents filled Harry with confusion.

He hated the fact that he didn't, and would never know them. He loathed the fact that people who had known them assumed he would be anything like them.

' And don't forget. I've chosen to work for the man who killed them. The man who sentenced me to never knowing them, to never even knowing what I've lost!'

Harry shuddered in his hiding place. It didn't do well to think about the Dark Lord that way. The man was simply the most powerful he had ever met, except maybe Dumbledore.

And even though he had killed his parents, Harry still had more respect for the Dark Lord than he did for Dumbledore.

' Can't there be another way? With me not choosing a side? Not Dumbledore, and not the Dark Lord either? Is there really only two options?'

Harry shuddered again, and taking a deep breath, tried to clear his mind. It was harder than usual, but he managed eventually. By the time he managed though, he only had a few minutes to read before he would have to head off to lunch.

' All in all' he thought wryly, as he snuck back out of the Restricted Section, 'it hasn't been the most productive morning'

"Your shields," Snape said, "are passable. Further improvement will come from your own practice and more importantly-from experience. We will move on, to dodging. Since you are both Quidditch players, your reflexes should be good. But sports reflexes and battle reflexes are not the same thing. You will not always be able to say a shield. Some spells are capable of bursting through shields- most notably, the Killing Curse"

Snape's eyes flicked to Harry's forehead.

"Neither of you are even near capable of battle conjurations. So we will focus on dodging. Without casting a shield, do not allow yourself to be hit"

With no more introduction, Snape began flinging stinging hexes at them. Their reflexes came in good stead, they were able to dodge a lot of his attacks.

But not all.

"Dead"

Harry rubbed his arm

"Dead"

Draco's leg was hit.

"We will have to work more on this. Let us move on to Occlumency. Sit down, both of you"

"I am going to be entering your minds, and I will be doing it subtly and secretly. Tell me when you notice my presence"

Ten minutes later, Harry felt something. It was hard to describe, but it was like someone had inserted a q-tip into his brain and was rubbing.

"You're in!" He shouted.

Snape looked at him, lip curling slightly. "And have been for the last ten minutes. Was I seeking out information, I would have been able to access it. Draco, let us see how you fare"

A few minutes later, Draco shouted.

"Better, but not good enough. You need to notice the very instant I enter. Otherwise, all your secrets are bared to me"

Harry shuddered.

"Continue clearing your mind. Once I am satisfied with your ability to recognize a foreign presence, we will move on to real Occlumency"

"Real Occlumency?" Harry asked, heart sinking.

Snape sneered back at him. "This is merely preparation. You are still far, far away from hiding your secrets from a Legilemens. And you are still far from mastering your mind. Continue your practice"

"Sir? About Dementors?"

"Once we move on to the next stage of Occlumency, I will begin teaching you the Patronus. Until then, continue your practice"

"Draco?"

"Yeah?"

"What's going on with Pansy?"

"What do you mean?"

"She's been acting weird. Complimenting me all the time. Since she-since she found me. You know, when everyone was looking"

"She has been acting weird"

"At first I thought I kinda scared her, and that she was, you know, trying to make sure she's on my good side. Now I'm not so sure"

"Why did you think you'd scared her?"

"When she found me, I was" Harry lowered his voice. There was no one in the corridor with them, but Snape had instilled paranoia in them, "practicing one of the spells we learned over the summer. The first one"

"And she saw?" Draco's voice rose and cracked.

"Yeah. But I told her not to tell"

"You told her not to tell"

"I may have pointed my wand at her threateningly"

"Well" Draco drawled, "they do say girls like a bad boy".

It took Harry a few seconds to comprehend what Draco had just said. When it clicked though, it clicked hard.

"You think she's-you think she-"

"I think she fancies you"

Harry's mind blanked more successfully than it had in any of his Occlumency practice. One of the fittest girls in his year was crushing on him?

' Holy shit' he thought, giddily.

Then he asked the first question on a thirteen-year-old boy's mind.

"You think she'll put out?" He asked, trying to keep his voice casual.

Draco considered it. "I think if there's any girl our year who would, it's Pansy. You lucky bastard"

' That certainly bears thinking about. When everyone else is asleep'

"What do I do? I've never-never had a-"

"She's not your girlfriend yet, mate. Maybe ask her to Hogsmeade with you?"

"But what do I do? What do we talk about?"

"Just be natural. And don't stress about it. Ask her tomorrow, she'll definitely say yes"

"You think?"

"Trust me, Harry. I'm sure if it"

"Pansy?" Harry called as she was about to step into the Great Hall.

His stomach was shaking.

"Yes, Harry?" She said with a small giggle.

"Do you, uh. Do you wanna uh"

She arched an eyebrow.

"Do you wanna go to Hogsmeade with me? On Halloween?" He blurted.

Her eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up.

"I'd love to!" She said with a smile, "where should we meet? I've never been before"

"Me neither. Maybe, in the Great Hall? Before we go? Or by the entrance?"

"Sounds fantastic" She was blushing a bit.

"Which one you wanna do?"

"Great Hall? What time should we meet?"

"Let's say, 10?"

"Awesome!" She walked off with a spring in her step.

Harry watched her go, still stunned that he had actually gone through with it.

He walked into the Great Hall for breakfast with a huge smile on his face.

"Professor Waffling?" Granger had her hand up.

' Of course. If she isn't trying to answer a question, she's trying to ask one'

"Yes, Miss Granger?"

"We've been working with a lot of theories regarding the soul. I was just wondering, what proof do we actually have to the soul's existence?"

"That's a good question. You're muggleborn, correct?"

"Yes," Granger said, blushing a bit.

"For those of you wondering," Waffling said, addressing the class as a whole, "in the muggle world the existence of the soul is hotly debated, primarily between atheists and theists. They have no proof to offer either way, but we do"

She paused for a moment before going in.

"Those who have witnessed the Dementors kiss, have seen the soul actually depart the body. When soul magic was still performed, any practitioner of it could offer many visual proofs. Besides this, we have many, many pieces of circumstantial evidence to prove this. Let me make it perfectly clear, however, that the existence of the soul does not prove the existence of a god or gods. That is a common mistake made by those raised in the muggle world. We do not view religion and souls as synonymous. Is that clear?"

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you"

"Pleasure. Now, if we can continue to discuss the souls affects on our capabilities with magic. We were talking about…"

Halloween dawned brightly upon Hogwarts, bringing a welcome respite from the grey skies of previous days.

' I must have lost the plot completely. What do we even do, honestly? Just talk? This is gonna be so awkward'

Harry rubbed his sweaty palms against his robe as he walked into the Great Hall.

' Was I meant to bring her flowers or something? Should I take her hand? God, why isn't there an instruction manual or something?'

"Pansy!" Harry called waving her over. She was dressed in the uniform, which definitely eased his mind a bit. He'd been quite worried about whether he was expected to dress up for the occasion.

"Hey," She said brightly, "you ready to go?"

"I think so. Got to go through the crowd and all that"

"Yeah"

She stood there awkwardly for a second before Harry clicked.

"So" he extended a hand, "shall we?"

Hogsmeade was cool. Harry and Pansy store down the village's long, winding street, stopping to check out the shops and greet friends.

By the time they got to the Three Broomsticks, they were laden with packages. Sweets from Honeydukes, some-equipment from Zonko's (the Weasley twins attack on the Slytherin Quidditch team may have been a year ago, but it was not forgotten), a new quill from Scrivenshafts. He was more than glad to arrive at the Three Broomsticks, find a table, and dump the bags on the floor.

"So ridiculous they don't put featherweight charms on these things," Harry said.

"Honestly, it's like they're all muggles!" Pansy added. "Speaking of Muggles, look who just walked in"

Harry turned, to see Granger walking through the door, with her dimwits in tow.

"Hey, Granger! Didn't you think to brush your hair?" Pansy shouted.

Granger went beet red. Weasley looked like he wanted to shout something back, but she put her hand on his arm and whispered something.

"Honestly, I don't know why people like that are even allowed in Hogwarts," Pansy said to Harry.

"I don't know why you guys hate her so much. I mean, she's an annoying know-it-all, but so is half of Ravenclaw"

Pansy looked at him, mouth agape.

"She's a mudblood" she hissed, looking around, "that's what makes her know-it-allness so bad"

"But why does that make her worse than a pureblood know-it-all?"

Pansy spluttered. "Because-because she-"

Right then, their butterbeers arrived. Grateful for the distraction, Harry sipped his.

"It is much better fresh. Flint wasn't talking nonsense"

"Mmm. Listen, Harry. A Ravenclaw who's a know-it-all? That's just normal. A mudblood who's a know-it-all is cause she's trying to prove she's better than us"

"I guess", he said doubtfully, "I mean-"

"It doesn't matter. Why are we talking about something so gross anyway?"

"I dunno. You brought it up, and-"

"How've all your classes been?" She interrupted.

"Pretty cool. It's great how they all fit in with each other…"

A few minutes into his explanation in their latest discussion in Magical Theory, Harry noticed Pansy's eyes were glazing over.

' Merlin, I'm boring her!'

"How've yours been?"

"Fine. Care would be much better with a different teacher, but Hagrid is Ok. Divination is such a waste of time though if Trelawney is a seer than I'm a kneazle!"

"Really?"

Pansy rolled her eyes.

"She just talks such nonsense, all the time! Anyway, my mother says you can't learn to be a seer"

"So why'd you take it?"

"Duh. Easiest O there is, except muggle studies, and I would touch that with a ten-foot broomstick"

Just after Harry had paid, but before actually getting up to leave, Pansy started leaning her head towards him. It took a few seconds for him to process, but then-

' Oh fuck. Oh fuck. It's actually happening. Holy fucking shit'

He kissed her.

Her lips were soft, warm. He wasn't sure exactly what to do with his tongue, and the table in between them made it awkward to try out his hands around her, but he kissed her.

They surfaced, and Harry found himself staring into her chocolate eyes.

"That was nice," he said breathlessly.

She giggled slightly. "Yes, it was. Let's see if it gets even better"

It did.

They walked back to the castle holding hands, and only stopped for one more snog outside the entrance.

It was much better without a table in the way. Feeling her heart beating against his chest gave the kiss an intensity that had been lacking before.

' God, I hope she can't feel me too much. Fuck, she can definitely feel that it's pressing right into her!'

They sat next to each other at the feast, looking at each other and smiling every so often.

Even Theo's taunts couldn't ruin the great feeling Harry had. Especially when Daphne slapped him after he got a little too suggestive.

A few minutes after he had arrived back at the common room, still holding Pansy's hand, Snape stormed in. After a quick, muted conversation with the prefects, the whole house was called.

"Sirius Black has been in the castle"

Immediately, excited murmurs broke out.

"Silence! You will all be sleeping in the Great Hall tonight, while the castle is searched"

Snape looked over the sea of faces

"Follow the prefects. You will return in the morning to change"

"Oh, Harry. Are you all right?" Pansy whispered.

"I'm fine. I wasn't joking when I said I'm not worried about Sirius Black"

He didn't pay attention to the adoring look Pansy gave him. Or the calculating one from Theo.