Chapter 46 - Flurry

I immediately withdrawn half of my savings and put it into good use. I quickly bought a high quality video camera before I went back home and read its manual until I fall asleep. The rest of the money I used for renting a music studio room to record all of Nikita's song covers.

In our day-offs, we go to various picturesque locations - places that have some connection with the song lyrics we reviewed - and make simple music videos there.

We both became super busy. All of our focus, time, and attention is on this project. We are dedicated, doing our very best to make it successful. Still, we had lots of fun and adventures together. Creating music videos for the first time with no prior experience and background knowledge on video-editing computer software is tedious and complicated, but fun.

We had so many retakes! >w<

All of this is painfully, irritatingly, tiring and hard. The progress and internet upload is quite slow too. But it's all right.

Being with the one I love is fun. :)

======================================================

After months of daily uploads, updates, correspondence, improvisations, and hard work, we finally had some results. It's not the phenomenal "viral sensation" result we're expecting, but it's still big for us.

1,500+ followers, 20,318 views, and 6,732 likes ain't that bad, right?

We're so happy to see that something is happening. We're very encouraged to see the fruits of our labor. Just a few more months of top-notch singing performance and she'll surely make a name for herself.

She'll definitely become a recording artist.

She'll finally become a star!

But before her fame gets to her head and forget all about me, I confessed my love for her one day as we're eating our after lunch ice cream dessert on a fast food restaurant.

With all honesty and sincerity, I told her everything inside my heart.

I told her she's my inspiration. That she inspired me to go on and live my life no matter what.

I told her that I love her so much and I'll do everything her.

I told her that I want to be more than friends and I'm 6-feet-under-dead-serious about it.

I told her that she's my star. And even if she doesn't become a famous singing star, she'll always be a star for me.

I told her that I'll always be loyal to her.

I told her all my thoughts about her. Showered her with compliments. Confessed all my feelings. How happy and colorful my life have become when I met her.

I told her all my dreams, all my plans for the future.

As she heard all the things I've said, she definitely got the shock of her life. Her eyes are wide open, even her mouth is open too. The expression on her face is priceless! But I must admit, as I was expecting to hear her reply, the five minutes of silence between us is like an eternity of waiting for me! I really don't know what's going on inside her head or what answer she's going to say, I'm just hoping she'll say yes.

And thank goodness! She smiled and gave me a nod!

Oh! Actions do speak louder than words!

I softly held her hands and promised to her that I'll give her happiness.

That we'll be happy together.

Forever.

======================================================

The date is January 3, 2026. Nikita and I have been a couple for more than three months. I said "couple" and not "lovers" because I cannot consider our relationship to be "close", "sweet", and "romantic".

We didn't go on a movie date in Halloween last year because I have a night time shift in the restaurant and she had a gig in a bar.

We didn't celebrate Christmas together because she'll sing in a mini concert with other bands and I'm managing my hot spring business. I have many customers at that time of the year.

I invited her in our house so we can celebrate the New Year together and also to finally introduce her to my parents, but sadly... She said "I'm sorry. I cannot come." She's invited to sing in a big concert somewhere. I can't remember the place. I really wanted to go with her, but I can't. I needed to stay in our home because of our old family tradition (Every family member must be together in New Year's Eve so that the family will never fall apart in the coming year).

I really, really wanted for her to meet my parents...

You get what I'm saying? We always have conflicting schedules and she always have excuses and it's so frustrating!

Yes, we're "officially a couple", but...

Somehow... I don't know... Cliché as it is, we're so near, and yet so far.

Yes, we're always together in the past, creating music videos and sometimes going to different bars and restaurants for gigs.

But it's like... We're starting to fall apart...

I feel like, there's a growing space or distance between us...

We're a couple, right? We should have those heart-to-heart talks and know more about each other, right...? So our relationship could grow stronger, right...?

We should be planning for our future, right...?

I really do hope it's just me being a worrywart and a paranoid. After all, how can we do those things when we're so busy working together to achieve my beloved's dream?

We have no more time for that...

But still...

We should always make time, right...?

And so, I decided to arrange a surprise romantic candlelight dinner date for her and me tonight.

=====================================================

"Nice place, huh?"

"Yes, it is."

We just arrived and entered a well-known fine dining restaurant in our province. Man, the place is fancy! There's even a pianist playing "Humoresque by Dvorak" on an ebony grand piano!

It's over my limited budget, that's for sure. But it's good to do this kind of stuff once in a while. Besides, it's for my beloved.

She only deserves the best.

And being a gentleman, I softly moved a chair and offered her to take a seat.

"It's been so long since we spend time together like this, Nikita. I know we've been really busy with all our daytime work and your nighttime gigs, but please,"

I softly held her hands.

"Let's talk. I want to know you more! I want to be closer to you. Now don't get me wrong. I want to be closer to you but not in a physical way! That's after marriage! What I'm trying to say is, let's have more bonding time together."

She slowly pulled out her hands from mine.

In an instant, my whole body went cold and all my worries came flooding inside my head.

"There's something I want to tell you, Teslan."

The words I dreaded the most.

"What is it...? Have I done something wrong...?"

"No, no. You didn't, Teslan. It's just that... there's something I've been meaning to tell you..."

(Teslan's thoughts: There's something you're not telling me...? What? A secret? Please don't tell me you have another lover!)

"And I've always wanted to tell you..."

(Teslan's thoughts: I'll beat him so bad, whoever that guy is.)

"Teslan..."

She raised up her bowed head and looked at me straight in the eye for the first time in this evening.

"I've signed-up for the Mars Mission Project."

Silence...

I did not comprehend what she just said. It's like, my mind just stopped working.

It was so sudden, so surprising, all I can manage to say is "Ha...?"

I'm thankful that it's not about a second lover. But Mars Mission Project...? That came out of nowhere. What on earth is that?!

"What do you mean, Nikita?"

"Simply put, I'll become an astronaut and go to Mars, Teslan."

Silence...

"Ha...? That's ridiculous!"

"I knew you would say that..."

"No! I mean... How can you become an astronaut? Do you know anything about space? Or rocket ships...?"

"I'm a college graduate holding a degree on Meteorology and Astronomy. My real dream is to become a Weather Forecaster in a major news network. It didn't happened because the competition is cut-throat and I had no contacts. I don't have those so-called 'Friends in the high places'. I desperately needed to have a job but I have no other choice. That's why I became a cashier in Pho Restaurant. It's almost impossible to find a related job with my college degree."

"Wow... I didn't know you want to become a weather forecaster."

"You didn't know because you never asked."

"How can I ask if you're so busy with your gigs! You can't even spend quality time with me! And you're rarely present at the restaurant with all your vacation leave! What the heck is really going on, Nikita?!"

She just sat there, silent, staring at the red tablecloth.

"You're not kidding me, aren't you...? You're not lying...? You will really go to Mars...? As in seriously? You will literally go there?"

"Yes."

"Correct me If I'm wrong, but that's a one way ticket, right? There's no existing space ship in there to get you back to Earth!"

"Yes."

Silence...

"No... That's crazy... That's suicide! I'll never allow it! I'm not letting you go!"

"I also knew you would say that..."

Silence...

Our first fight... Over something so... I don't know... This is just ridiculous!

No...

I don't want to end our night like this! Not on a bitter note!

I tried to ease the tension between us and lighten up the mood.

"Sigh... What am I even worrying about? There will be thousands, maybe millions who wants to join that Mars Project! There's going to be a test or qualifications of some sort! We don't know for sure if you'll pass that exam or not. But if the worst case happens, don't you ever worry, Nikita. You'll always have me by your side and we'll keep working hard together to achieve your dream of becoming a famous recording artist!"

"I already registered to NASA, Teslan. I already submitted all the needed requirements, took their exams online, and passed all of them. That's why I told you, 'I signed-up for the Mars Mission Project'. They already 'chose' me as their candidate. I already 'signed' the contract."

I can't breathe... This can't be!!!

"No... You can't go, Nikita!"

"I'm going, Teslan. You can't stop me. It's done."

Silence...

"You're going to leave me...?"

"I'm sorry. But don't worry. You can still send me video messages to Mars. We can still keep contact."

"NONSENSE!!! YOU DON'T EVEN REPLY TO MY TEXT MESSAGES!!!"

All the people inside the restaurant looked at us. Even the pianist stopped playing.

There was a moment of pure, sickening silence.

But after a few seconds, everything went back to normal. The world never stopped spinning. Life never stopped moving forward. The people around us went back eating their dinner and the pianist began to play his piano.

Nobody cares what's happening between us right now...

Help... Please... Somebody help me... I don't know what to do with this...

"Teslan, please calm down. You love me, so please understand. I need to do this."

"That's what I couldn't understand! I love you! You don't have to do this! But why do you still insist?!"

"It's the greatest opportunity that ever came to my life, Teslan! I'd be a fool to let this pass!"

"And for that opportunity, you'll leave your family, your home, me...?"

"They are the reason why I'm doing this in the first place, Teslan!"

"Huh...?"

"One million dollars will be given to my family once we leave the earth. That's fifty million pesos in our currency, Teslan! When we're on Mars, my family will receive one hundred thousand dollars per month as my salary arrangement. That will continue for as long as the Mars Colony exists! Isn't that great? I already have their permission! And there's nothing to worry about! NASA technology is so advanced, no harm will befall on us!"

Silence...

My voice cracked as I started to speak.

"What are you trying to say...? That I can't provide for you...? That I can't give financial assistance to your family...? I know I'm not rich... I don't have much... But I can work! I have a job and a small business! It's not that glamorous... and my salary isn't big, but I can still give! You don't need to risk your life just for that! It's not worth it!"

"I'm tired, Teslan! I'm so tired! What?! You want me to work for the rest of my life?! You want me to do the same sickening routine over and over again?! I want a break! And this is it!"

"Please! Be reasonable, Nikita! You can sing! You're talented! You can become a recording artist! Just a little bit-"

"I've been working and singing even before I met you, Teslan! I see no progress! I achieved nothing! Everything is so sickening slow! Nothing's ever going to change and nothing's ever going to happen if I stay here!!! I want something big to happen in my life in this is it!"

Silence...

"I-I'll double my efforts. L-let's try the r-radio stations! We haven't tried that, r-right? L-let's go to auditions! You'll s-surely w-win those contests, Nikita! O-or w-we can start a band! Yeah! W-we can d-do that, r-right?"

"I think it's time for us to break-up, Teslan."

Silence...

(Teslan's thoughts: What...? You're gonna choose Mars over me...? Once you're there, there's no going back! You're going to die there!)

"Y-you're t-tired, Nikita! J-just like you've said! We can r-rest! L-let's take a big vacation from all of this! We need to clear our minds before we make this decision!"

Silence...

"I've already made my decision, Teslan. I've made up my mind. I'll be the first woman, the first Filipina in the history of mankind to go on Mars!"

She slowly stood up and walked away.

"W-wait!"

I reserved this table and we didn't even eat our dinner together... and enjoyed each others company...

Why...?

Have I done anything wrong...?

Have I said something bad...?

Have I offended you in anyway...?

Did I hurt you...?

Please... tell me...

I'm sorry...

Please... forgive me...

I'll never do it again...

I promise...

No...

I've done nothing wrong...

Everything I did, I did for you. All I ever did was to love you...

You've been blinded...

You've been deceived by them!

No! I will never give up!

There must be something I can do...

To win your heart again...