Chapter 030

Azriel

She burst out crying again, unconsciously clenching my shirt so hard that I thought she was going to rip it. My heart clenched, seeing her.

I picked her up and was about to lay her down on the bed, but couldn't because her grip was so strong around my shirt.

"You're leaving me? You're sick of me?"

"No, Fiery. I could never be sick of you. I am not leaving." I whispered, my voice gentle yet firm, as she slowly let go of my shirt.

I hurriedly took of my shirt and plopped down on bed with her, pulling her closer until her cheek was pressed against his chest. She still cried silently. Why wouldn't she?

I stroked her hair soothingly, trying to provide her the warmth she only had once before it was too snatched away from her. Her grandmother. Everyone asked who killed her parents. But, no one questioned her grandmother's death. It was also a murder.

"Riel?" My heartbeat quickened as she called out to me. Azzy and Riel were the names she used to call me when we were younger. But she didn't know that. She had forgotten us. And I didn't want her to remember anything about us.

"What is it, Fiery?" I asked gently.

I continued to stroke her hair in an attempt to provide her with some measure of comfort. Her pain was palpable, and I wished I could take it all away.

She moved closer to me, taking her time in speaking, her tears still flowing freely, dampening my bare chest.

"Hm?" I spoke again, waiting patiently.

"I-I don't understand why y-you would stay. I don't understand why I am a monster who killed. I don't understand anything about my childhood and the stuff with abaddon."

My heart sank as I listened to Selene's words, the weight of her confusion and pain evident in her trembling voice. The truth was complex, and there was some truth I didn't even want to tell her. She would hate me even more. I could tell her some though so I decided to start with Abaddon and me, "Abaddon and I was never the best brothers, but I had always felt a connection with him. The reason why he turned evil is not because, I overshadowed him and whatever the fuck Jared was spouting when we ate dinner," My voice filled with venom as I mentioned his name, but it only made Selene uncomfortable so I softened myself, "He turned evil because he wanted to have the powers, the greed, there was a man helping him with powers. I don't know who the man is. But that's the story of him only he can complete."

I looked down at her, her puzzled face still evident, as she wiped her teary face. I knew she was processing what I'd just told her.

"When did this happen? Abaddon giving in to the darkness?" She whispered, staring up at me.

"When we were fifteen."

"When did I...kill your father?"

[Warning: Violent content, Parental Guidance suggested]

"When Abaddon was ten and I was nine. I saw it happening right before my eyes, but Abaddon was outside with his friends. Two days before of my father's death, Fiery, he had smashed my mother's head onto a table," I spoke, "stabbed both her eyes, all because he was angry. She lay there bleeding and she could have been saved still but I couldn't call anyone because I was the next in line."

I watched as she sat up from my arms, blinking, "But Abaddon where was he?" Her black eyes gazed at me, searching for any kind of sadness or emotion. But I didn't have any.

I shook my head, "I don't know."

"I... I'm so sorry, Azriel," she choked out, her voice filled with a mix of sorrow and shock.

"It's fine. You saved me, killed my father. Happy ending." I whispered as she hugged me, her arms wrapping around my neck as she lay down on me again. "And if you call yourself a monster again, I swear to god,"

She didn't say anything for a few seconds before she let out the words that I didn't want to face, to hear, "Did we know each other when we were younger?"

"Not really. You had saved me but you didn't know me," I lied, my face bearing no expression at all. "But I knew you because I was assigned as your guardian a long time ago."

The lie tasted bitter on my tongue, and guilt gnawed at me. I would tell her when she would be ready to hate me for real. Not now. Now, she needed me. Maybe I shouldn't ever tell her this.

"How? You were just a child?"

"Child or not, that was our job. I was assigned to protect you, but I think I failed considering you call yourself a monster now, when you saved me once again near that waterfall. That you saved my friend Jared because you saw me upset about it. The electricity, the pain you endured it all to save a man you didn't even know." I let out, my voice heavy with emotions I didn't show, "You have always been a saviour, Selene. Not a monster. Never a monster."

This was the truth. She had always been a saviour. A saviour that had been misunderstood by numerous of people who made her believe that she was not worthy of anything. I wanted to kill them all, to peel their skin of their bodies for hurting her so much that she thought of herself as a monster, as a good-for-nothing.

I held her gaze, as she looked at me, and finally gave in when she saw nothing but truth in my eyes. It was the truth. She hugged me tightly. "Please don't leave me," She whispered, now at ease.

"Never." I promised, and I knew that I would never leave her but there were chances that she would leave me in the future, and I wouldn't be able to blame her. Because it was all my fault.

She looked up at me, her eyes filled with a mix of gratitude and vulnerability. In that moment, I vowed to myself that I would do whatever it took to protect her, to help her find the strength and healing she deserved. And if the time came when she needed to confront the truth of our past, I would face it with her, ready to accept the consequences of my actions.

And no matter what happened, I would do everything in my power to ensure that she knew she was never alone, even if she decided to leave me in the future.