A Dream Leading to Deaths

(Suicide Warning}

Dreaming is something I'd briefly read from a human writing in a confession for a crosser-human case. It was said to be confused picture-like feelings--usually of previous experiences--that tries to convey from the subconscious mind to the conscious mind something the conscious mind needed help understanding.

I never thought it'd be something like this.

---

The view before me was blurry, like an old movie. I could only guess what I was seeing through it. It looked gloomy and dark. A castle loomed before me. The sky was covered in dark clouds. I could feel a heaviness on my shoulders and a chill down my back. The blur was rain and it was so heavy it pressed down on me like a weight.

A hand touched my shoulder. I didn't feel the touch, but I knew it was there. The owner of the hand said something, but I couldn't hear it. I only knew they were welcoming me inside. It felt sinister. Did they have evil intentions?

People lined up on both sides of the entrance. It felt like a crowd coming to laugh at me. Were they whispering behind my back? I tried not to look at them. My feet moved forward on their own. Voluntarily entering their reach. I was quickly surrounded. The walls of the castle moved in on me. They looked like they were about to crush me. I made eye contact with someone in the corner. Their face was blurred.

The world suddenly turned on its head and the castle around me disappeared. The person before me didn't move. I felt their surprise. Then, a wide white smile filled half of their blurred face. I felt the grim reaper reaching out to grasp me.

---

I woke up on the floor.

I finally figured out what had overtaken my energy. It was the previous owner's mana. The reason it exploded was that my energy levels had dropped so far below the mana levels that it reactivated.

New crossers are reminded to remove the previous owner's mana as soon as possible to gain control of the body and remove any chances of sudden death while fighting. I'd never bothered with it because my energy levels were so high I barely noticed it. It was like the pea under the princess's bed. Only I noticed it and rolled to the other side to sleep. Honestly, I'd barely given it a thought outside of the first minute I crossed and gave it a vague energy once-over.

My neck was aching from the angle I'd rested at. I stretched and wobbled onto my aching legs as I made my way to the bathroom for a hot bath. I needed to think.

Instrumentals played a soft tune and the scent of citrus filled the air. I relaxed until only my chin and shoulders stuck out of the bubble bath. I'd never bothered to do something like this before. It was entirely human. This must have been because of that dream.

I don't think it was a dream. I think it was a memory. The question was why? Or rather, how?

When humans get mana sickness their consciousness fades into nothing. Their mind wears away until they become a vegetable. Was this boy not entirely gone when they sent me over? No, that shouldn't be possible. Such things were strictly watched by both humans and crossers alike. We would never allow such a thing to happen.

I shook my head. I had to look at it from a different direction.

I paused to groan. When I shook my head my neck cracked. The hot water had made the rest of my body just melt into it so I forgot a moment about my neck. I leaned back and lowered myself further into the bath and rubbed my neck with my warmed hands. It was like a hot pad. My chest vibrated as I laughed.

Wait.

I gulped. I stopped moving and looked down at my bubble bath. I moved my toes, my knee, my waist, my hands began to shake as I felt the active barriers surrounding me. The mist of energy was still there.

My breathing came faster. I felt like I would start melting any second now, but I wouldn't. The barrier protecting my brain was still active. In the first place, my active and suppressed energy was almost equal so there was no longer any need to worry about melting.

That's the problem. I wasn't exerting any will to keep this energy in place. The mana was still there.

I'd assumed it had left with the memories. No, in fact, I'd overlooked this in my shock. My energy and the boy's mana had joined.

I was contaminated.

My energy was impure.

I puked over the side of the bath.

…

That afternoon a doctor found the body of the only survivor of the newest crosser batch in a bath of red. He claimed he didn't smell the copper over the citrus until he saw past the bubbles.

This was put down in the records as the first Janie agent to commit suicide in an 'ideal candidate' body.

…

The first thing I noticed when regaining my consciousness was the aching pain in every inch of my body. I lay still to recover until a sound coaxed my eyes to open. A young man with apple cheeks entered the room.

"Have you come to?" His lips and eyes curved into a sweet smile. He tucked his white coat under him as he sat at the chair at my bedside and opened up his tablet.

"Wha-" My voice erupted into a flurry of coughs. "Da-date, what?"

"It is the 9th day of the 3rd month of the 284th year of the connection calendar." He tinkered with the nightstand for a moment before handing me a sponge, "Open your mouth. This will help. Don't worry, it's just water."

I closed my eyes. I connected my energy to my heart and pumped it off, counting. The heart monitor beeped irregularly.

"Huh?"

I dropped my will. The heart monitor still beeped irregularly. My face contorted into that of a devil's.

"Are you feeling nervous? There is no nee-" The doctor looked at the monitor with confusion, but kept his voice calm and soothing.

"No!"

A hand shot out and clenched around the doctor's neck.

"You've ruined me!" a raging voice filled the facility. "I can never go back!" It was filled with despair.

The doctors had experience with 'uncooperative' patients. The apple-cheeked doctor's hand shot out and a tube was pressed against my arm. Before I lost consciousness I heard a sharp 'crack' from my hand.

The only survivor of the newest crosser batch was put down later that evening by Executive Elissa Barns under suspicion of working with the anti-faction.

…

Thus ended Agent Janie Valnr's third life in the human world.

…

The first thing I noticed when regaining my consciousness was the aching pain in every inch of my body. I lay still to recover until a sound coaxed my eyes to open. A young man with apple cheeks entered the room.

"Have you come to?" His lips and eyes curved into a sweet smile. He tucked his white coat under him as he sat at the chair at my bedside and opened up his tablet.

My body ached. I suppressed the extra energy before it settled into the body and tried to melt it. Once I'd suppressed everything I'd usually be able to, I noticed I could continue suppressing. The mana was suppressing it for me.

The mana was like will itself. Once it was given a command, it carried it out until it was either used up or given a new command.

My energy didn't kick out the mana that was here. They did not try to eat one another. They had created something entirely new.