Chapter 17 - Touching The Orb
As Shi's hand reached out and touched the transparent orb, her fingers softly caressing the black and white hue it released, she was instantly hit with a wave of emotions out of the blue. Anger, hatred, sadness, disappointment, loss, fear, happiness, joy, love, longing, contempt, approval, and satisfaction. Negative and positive emotions alike assaulted her mind and body in waves, like a boat lost at sea during a storm.
Shi was startled by this sudden onslaught of feelings, allowing her mind to temporarily snap out of the daze she was previously caught in. She tried to resist them, but when she tried to resist them, they only grew stronger. She couldn't help but let out a soft moan as she struggled against the powerful emotions that seemed to be trying to pull her down into their depths, she tried moving her hand away from the orb, but it seemed as if it was stuck to the orb.
The orb latching onto her very skin. The power within the orb seemed to be connected to her very blood and bone. As she fought back, the negative aspects of the emotions began to push forward, and when she gave in, the positive aspects of the emotions became more prominent. Shi didn't even know why she was feeling these emotions, she assumed it was because of the orb, it was pretty obvious, but she didn't know why the orb was doing it.
As the emotions became more overwhelming with her continued resistance, her mind started to feel weaker internally and emotionally. Her body followed soon after, weakening under the force of her own emotions. Unable to bear resisting it any longer, she fell to her knees, tears flowing down her cheeks and onto the floor in droves. Her body was visible shaking out of both fear, anger, and sadness, towards herself, towards others, towards Kami, and just generally towards everyone.
She didn't want to resist anymore, she couldn't, she didn't want to feel like this anymore.
So she didn't. She simply gave into the orb, and allowed the positive feelings to rush at her, happiness, contentment, love, they came to her just as fast as the others had, but this time she didn't resist them, she welcomed them. Her mind relaxed as she finally felt good, darkness entered her view, as she drifted away. The only thing she could hear as she faded, was a faint voice to the back of her head, she couldn't quite make out what it was saying.
"Wake up?" Why would she wake up, she was just fine as she was now, no, she was better than fine, she was great. She didn't pay attention to the voice any further, her mind gave into itself, and she fell unconscious.
==========
Her eyes fluttered open languidly, her mind still hazy from the overwhelming influx of emotions she previously felt. It took a few seconds for her to regain composure and look around to see what was going on. It was then she realized something quite unusual, she was no longer in the white room, in fact, it didn't even look like she was anywhere near it. The first thing she noticed was the walls, wooden, which would be unlikely to find in the desert, then came the realization that she was laying down on a bed of hay, a comfortable and familiar one at that.
"Wait, this can't be." She muttered out loud to herself unconsciously, her mind racing at the possibility that this could be what she thought it was.
Jumping off the bed of hay, she stood up and looked around the room. A small room made from wood, a bed made from hay in a corner next to a small window to see outside, a desk at another end of the room, on which was a bunch of mess haphazardly thrown around. No wonder it was so familiar, this was her room. Her very room when she was at the tender age of 10, it hadn't changed much as she got older, but she assumed 10 because at 11 she got a small bookshelf, and at 9 she didn't have a room of her own yet.
"This, this isn't possible. How is this going on, where am I?" She was not only confused but also worried. How could she possibly be in a room that existed over six years ago? This shouldn't be possible, Shi had heard about talks about magic related to time, but such magic was said to be near impossible to cast, let alone cast on her for no reason.
"I must be dreaming, I must have passed out because of the orb, and my mind is playing tricks on me from stress," Shi mumbled to herself, walking towards the desk, her mind was racing, trying to figure out what was happening. Her hands ran along the surface of the wooden desk as she did, testing to see if it was real, it felt so real. There were even the small markings she engraved into the desk when she was bored, her little doodles, how could her mind remember something she couldn't even remember and replicate it so perfectly.
It wasn't long before she sat down in front of the desk, staring blankly at the wall, her mind was still too jumbled to think properly. "Maybe I should try to calm down and see if I can figure out what's going on." It was at this moment she noticed that her body had also changed.
She wasn't previously paying much attention to it because of the shock, but once she sat down she noticed that she was a lot shorter than before. Shi was 16 years old as of this year, and with that age came a height of around 5'7 which she was quite proud of because it kept her from being harassed growing up. Now, however, she was much shorter, not even standing at 5 feet. "What the-" Standing up quickly she moved to the window, looking at her appearance in the reflection of the old stained glass.
There she stood, a 10-year-old Shi, no taller than 4'6 with a frame that can easily be called malnourished. She looked so much different from her current self, yet so similar, Shi couldn't help but be amazed by it, mesmerized as she stared. The reflection showed her silvery-white hair, which, unlike her current hair that was pure silver, was stained with a dirtiness to it. Her dull red eyes seemed so lifeless compared to her crimson eyes which she have had ever since she had awakened her bloodline.
She did miss the light white skin tone though, now she was pale white, and looked as if she had died, though she did die. Her hair wasn't as long as it was now, only reaching around her shoulder in the reflection when in reality her hair could reach her waist if not tied properly. She was wearing simple clothing, it was all they could afford even back then, a white shirt with a black skirt, she remembered that she always hated it because it was hard to move in, and it was uncomfortable.
"What-" Shi was about to speak further, but her own voice was interrupted when another voice called out to her from downstairs. It was a soft and sweet voice, that was almost melodic to Shi's ears.
"Honey, food is ready, come eat before it gets cold." The feminine voice said loud enough for her to hear all the way in her room.
Freezing, Shi knew who's voice that was. Who else would be in her house cooking food? Who else would call her honey? It was her mother, but that shouldn't be possible, her mother was gone, missing, maybe even dead. "No, who knows what's possible or not anymore, everything here is weird." She corrected herself, as she moved towards the door because even though she knew it shouldn't be possible, even though she knew it might just be a figment of her imagination, she wanted to see her again.
She wanted to see her mother, wanted to speak to her, to hold her. She never realized just how much she would miss her mother when she was gone, but over the course of the last few days, she was reminded of her with each passing moment. She tried to not let it show, she tried to not let it affect her because she still had to find the truth, find her. Yet the thought that she might be dead, that her loving mother might be gone, that very thought ate at her from inside.
She couldn't hold back those thoughts anymore, her mind racing as her foot moved even faster, practically bursting through the wooden door that hindered her way, and running into the arms of her mother. Hugging her without hesitation, she allowed her emotions to flow for the first time in a while, tears trickling down her sulking face and into the stomach of her mother's embrace. Whimpers escaped her lips as she tried so hard to hold back her sobbing cries.
It was so warm, so welcoming. Her mother's sweet scent of perfume, her gentle calloused hand, everything was as perfect as she remembered it. Her mother, while unsure about her sudden outburst, simply held her tightly in a hug, stroking her hair gently as she rubbed her back. Comforting her the best she can with soft nothings. That was just like her, to seek the best for her, to comfort her, even without knowing what was going on. That was all she ever wanted for her, the best, and yet Shi couldn't give her anything in return.
The hug lasted a few minutes, minutes which Shi spent simply crying in the arms of her mother, and her mother did not say anything besides words of comfort to try and help her.
Once she had calmed down enough, and her mind started to return to how it was before, she slipped out of the hug and wiped her tear-stained face with her hands, looking back up at her mother, getting to see her properly for the first time in a long time.
She was just how she remembered her, albeit a bit younger looking as she was only 32 around this time.
Her long locks of dawn tinted hair that ran down her shoulder, her dull orange eyes that carried wisdom and kindness that came with her age, her milky white skin that seemed blister less to a glance, but Shi knew that it wasn't, her hands were calloused from hard work, body wounded in injuries that couldn't heal, only be hidden.
Dressed in her short white gown that perfectly suited her short yet slim figure, she couldn't help but let out a smile at her mother's small size, because even back when she was younger, she was close in height to her, let alone 16 where she was taller.
"Mom you're-" She halted her words as she realized that this most likely wasn't the mother she knew. While she hoped it was, she knew that her mother was taken by the men, and this person before her wasn't the mother that was taken. She couldn't say anything about that yet, she needed to know what was going on first.
"What is wrong honey, did someone harass you again?" Her mother asked in a concerned voice. Why wouldn't she, she just spent a few minutes crying in her arms.
Shi shook her head as she forced a smile onto her face to reassure her mother. She could guess why her mother would assume she was being harassed, as she was indeed harassed often when she was younger, but as she grew older and taller, most of the other kids decided to simply ignore her, and she in turn ignored them.
"No mom, i just, i had a bad dream." She replied with a short stutter, as she struggled midway in order to come up with a believable excuse.
'Dammit, a bad dream, really?' She thought to herself over the terrible excuse, why would a bad dream make her that sad. Let's just hope that being 10 years old would make it more believable, though, Shi didn't remember herself being this emotional as a 10-year-old.
Her mother clearly didn't believe her fully, but she didn't want to push the girl for any answers and instead just smiled and decided to play it off. "Alright silly, don't worry mom's here, and mom will always be here. Come let's eat dinner, i made your favorite."
Shi couldn't help but smile, she was glad that her mother believed her lie and didn't bother to keep pushing. But she was also happy about the dinner. Her mother would make a pie that was filled with meat, which was her favorite, not only because it tasted so good, but also because her mother would work hard on it.
Though she couldn't eat it often because the meat was expensive in their little village.
"Yes, mom." She replied as she happily moved on over to the table to eat.