The Toughest Battle was Fought Inside

I tried to keep a cool head throughout the battle – after all, with one gym badge, I couldn't exactly be called a rookie! -, but going against my recently acquainted Professor Sycamore seemed to be something else entirely: I could feel my shoulders stiffen and my spirit die in my throbbing chest. Realizing that it was an easy battle only made it worse: As my Pikachu, Chasm, landed a critical attack and ruled out his water type in one hit, I grew nervous. Had he been strong as his many years in my advance should have made him, I would be at peace... Had he defeated me as he ought to do, being a specialist in the field of Pokémon, I wouldn't be so insecure... I would gladly smile and bow to his superiority, but apparently such was not the case. He did warn me though, and he was right: not tough at all!

He grabbed the second pokeball from his desk and, holding it between the tips of his fingers, brought it closer to his face and closed his eyes with a confident smile playing about his lips – it felt as if he was enjoying the moment and savoring his expectations on me for the next round. He sent out a grass type...

An angry little creature leapt from its pokeball and seemed ready to gnarl at Chasm, giving me a little fright. The Professor laughed:

"That is my friend Bulbasaur..." by hearing its name, Bulbasaur looked back on the Professor with faithful eyes. "She is hot-headed, just like you, miss Anne!"

"M-M-Me??! A hot-head??!" I shivered and blushed.

"Why, you are terribly nervous, I can see it from here!"

I smiled awkwardly and quickly looked away, losing the very composure of my body with embarrassment.

Bulbasaur, however, wasn't as happy with merely standing there and scrutinizing my shyness with a piercing smile as Professor Sycamore seemed to be: The Pokémon impatiently whipped the floor near Chasm's feet, producing a quick slash and giving my Pikachu a scare. She jumped to my arms and Bulbasaur gnarled what seemed like a triumphant laugh.

My eyes immediately sought a judge for such offense: but Professor Sycamore couldn't help but laugh himself! He then rubbed his Jaw – his fingers producing a soft sound as they scratched against his beard stubbles – and sighed in a thoughtful, surrendering way:

"That was a taste of Bulbasaur's Vine Whip... Though unrequired!" His eyes grew heavy upon his Pokémon, in the manner of a scold. Bulbasaur's little ears dropped.

I was next. I looked down at my Pikachu among my arms. She looked into my eyes, waiting:

"Chasm, land a thunder shock!"

Professor Sycamore watched carefully as Chasm jumped from my arms and, mid air, performed her attack. I began to realize that the battle was much more about him analyzing me than it was about winning, and things started to make sense – as they did, I smiled more confidently, now capable of fearlessly doing my best!

...The attack was unsuccessful though, as it hit Bulbasaur right on the spot but didn't seem to do much damage: after the small flash of energy pouring from Chasm's body vanished, Bulbasaur grinned, baring its little pointy teeth. Professor Sycamore pointed out in my direction and gave out the order:

"Vine whip!" He shouted directly.

...And though I had seen that attack before, I still lost to him: Chasm was defeated with Bulbasaur's harshness.

"Dammit..." – I squeezed my next pokeball with nervous fingers.

"Grass-typed Pokémon are resistant against electricity, you are learning it now!" Sycamore pointed out.

I sent out Fletching next, and he smiled, contented:

"Very well! Though your Fletching is probably too young to know any fire moves, it should still prove resistant to Bulbasaur's attacks... Even if it didn't, it's still a better choice than your Froakie!"

Yes, I was sure now: It was all about analyzing me! Why else would he already know my team?!

The battle went on for a few turns more. I enjoyed the reassuring remarks and satisfied smiles the Professor flashed at me whenever I thought up a good strategy, so I was soon too busy trying to make a good game to feel nervous, and too excited by his compliments to quiver wanting to disappear from his sight.

And when it was over – when Azure defeated a rather coward Charmander – I felt slightly disappointed – not because it was much easier than I expected from a man in Sycamore's position, but because it ended so soon... And there would be no more showing how smart I was. And no more of his sweet smiles parting my way...

He had saved a last one though: He sighed and dropped his shoulders, pretending to feel for the defeat:

"You got me, Anne! I guess you are too much for me..."

I giggled inwardly on how awesome receiving his recognition felt.

"You did manage to evolve your Froakkie into a Frogadier before I could notice, though! Not sure I can call it a fair fight..." He paced in my direction, stopping right before me.

"Well, we both know you would absolutely crush me if you had meant it..." I looked away before saying it, for his gaze was too close.

"Crush you!" – he played with the sound of the words, and, without previous warning, his fingers were on me again: they seized my chin, held them with a delicacy I hardly deserved, and pulled it sideways so that my eyes were facing him again.

I was wrong! I had not improved my confidence in that battle! I had not outgrown the sick and unknown feeling his touch brought to my heart. There it was, racing faster than mom's rhyhorn again!

He twitched his eyebrows and smiled at me, still holding my face so that my eyes couldn't escape his again:

"...Why would I ever do something that hostile to you, miss Anne?!" and he eyed me longer, waiting for the answer.

"It's... It's..." – I began to mutter when I realized he wouldn't let me go until I had given it to him "It's just an... expression..."

"Oh, is it? I'm glad you don't think such a thing of me, then!"

Finally freed from his touch, I could try to rehab my hyperventilation.

"You have impressive skills, Anne! I'm glad I chose you... There was never a doubt in me that I wouldn't regret it, of course, but I must say... I am impressed!"

I blushed, now too close to even try to hide, and his eyes danced around my face: I could see his blue irises moving slightly from one spot to the other, examining every little inch of a reaction. I thought I'd seen his smile stretch a little farther when he noticed the heat coming to my cheeks then, almost pleased by it. Was that why he held my face? Because he wanted to make sure he saw my reaction to his words?

I was glad he couldn't hear my heartbeat!

"Now, would you let me have a look at your Pokédex?" He broke the silence after what seemed a much too long stare contest.

"Sure!"

I picked it from my purse and handed it over. His hands encircled mine delicately, making sure I wouldn't drop the thing on the floor: a smart move, for my arms felt slightly numb.

"Impressive! You have seen over sixty Pokémon on your way from Vaniville! Excuse me, if you will..."

With a quick and elegant pace of his long legs he carried himself away from me, the air near me still held his perfume and his warmth for a few seconds after, that's how close to me he stood, and how quickly he left.

It was slightly sad that he was now gone to his desk, caught up with the excitement of his gear that I had been carrying. It seemed as if he was willing to exchange me for that little private encyclopedia I had been unintentionally gathering for him.

...I felt a pang of jealousy, but it burned much differently from the one I felt regarding mom. How very curious! And how very poignant, too!

"I must transfer your data to my computer and start studying it right away!" He said enthusiastically. "Sixty Pokémon... Imagine how many you can see once you've crossed the entire Kalos region! My, my..."

I kicked the floor and crossed my arms behind my back, missing the attention I had previously received.

"I'll also just..." his voice began to feign an explanation, but then trailed off into a murmur while his eyes quickly flickered my way, checking my position. It seemed odd... My eyebrows tightened.

"Just a minor installment, I hope you don't mind!" – He flashed me a lovely smile that immediately disarmed my suspicion.

"Here... and there..." He made some sort of last adjustments to my Pokédex, unplugged the cable and walked back in my direction, his eyes distracted by the small screen in his hands.

"You can have it back now, Anne..." He stopped with a hand in his pocket and the other handing the gear over to me.

As I reached for it, his smile stretched and his eyes grew warmer, bluer still:

"You are, indeed, a very interesting trainer..."

I blushed one last time, but my eyes didn't dare leave his – they were effectively stuck, captured... As was I, as I should later discover.

It took me so long staring into his gaze, that I didn't realize I was holding my Pokédex but had forgotten to remove it from his hands.

For some strange reason, he didn't rush me either.

"Where is he?!" – A foreigner, intrusive, excited voice sounded across the office.

"Professor Sycamore?!" a second one followed, and it was as if my ears could bleed.

"Shhh, they're here!" – I heard Shauan giggle, and when I turned to greet them, Calem stared at us with a rather awkward expression.

"Why, children! You're all here!!" Professor Sycamore quickly dropped my hands and opened his arms in a welcoming gesture, following in their direction.

Again, I had been the only one to sustain a vital, painful connection to his being... I was the only one hurting to see it interrupted.

Calem ignored the warm reception and walked straight to me. His hand held my shoulder - a small hand, his touch too hot, everything wrong with it! His eyes looked worried:

"Are you okay?!" He whispered, probably reading into my expression.

"I'm fine..." – I grunted "And you're late... All of you!!" I accused bitterly.

"Late?" Shauna began, catching ear of what I'd said "It must be a misunderst-"

"I was just about to hand out your new partners... each one of you can pick one!!" – Professor Sycamore added enthusiastically, above any parallel talk that Calem, Shauna and I might be leading.

"A new one??! Wow!" – Calem ran to his side, excited.

"Oh yes, but be calm all of you, now..." – They encircled him, and I stood where I was, still holding my Pokédex. The magic of the compliments, of the brilliancy I seemed to hold in his esteem... They all glowed, igniting me to life... but now there was only the trace of the previous ember, I felt myself slowly fading into ashes.

Professor Sycamore smiled to them... They all looked up to him like an idol, like someone they wanted to be when they grew up. And, in his eyes, they were all equally special – equally unique, however silly that might sound! It was pretentious and naïve of me, to think I was different... To think that maybe all of his glares and all of his smiles meant something else.

"Waaa!! A Bulbasaur!!!" I heard their excitements rise, and slowly took my steps towards that circle.

Hopefully, they were all too busy – Professor included – to realize what a gloomy state had taken over me. And what was left for the sore spirit, the one that couldn't share the collective radiance? ...A tiny Charmander held tightly to the Professor's pants, softly trembling – his big eyes surveying the scary faces all around him. It was pitiful to watch!

"I guess that leaves Anne with my little friend Charmander here..." The professor looked my way and smiled. Now, among the others, I could see how really distant his smile truly was!

"This Charmander travelled a long way to get here to Kalos... Just like you, Anne. I hope you will be very patient with him, and take a very good care of him."

He transferred the warm little body to my arms and I held him. Charmander let out a sad whimper, like those of puppies.

"Don't worry, boy! The two of you will make great friends!" Professor Sycamore petted his head, and I realized that the little creature grieved because it didn't want to leave his side.

Yes... we would probably make good friends!

"And I'll keep an eye on you..." Sycamore whispered close to his ear, reassuringly, as if I represented some kind of a threat. I rolled my eyes.

"Now, kids... Who wants to know about mega evolutions?"

They all screamed in excitement.