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The Meme Train

Little thing I decide to write for the fun memes, don't take this way too seriously, if you wanna vote, vote then. Just don't act like an ass. Also the book isn't for anyone of a prudish nature, so yeah, if you are then this ain't your cup of tea, hell it's not even tea, it's a full cup of espresso. Oh yeah, the R-18 tag is there for gore, I don't know know how to write good smut, and I don't plan to write smut in this book any given time. ____________________________________________ Take a look at me for example: I died, that was painful. I got chosen to be entertainment for some dude that I never got to even meet. I cheesed the "golden finger" I got and made an entire world go straight to fuck all. Now I'm just casually being the madman that everyone says I am. Oh, and fuck cultivators. I don't like their kind around here. What do you get? Some random kid being a fucking lunatic that's what! Take a read if you want! You'll definitely regret it! (Disclaimer, I own nothing aside from my MC and any OCs I may cook up, the cover was from google, I just searched Thomas the Thermonuclear Bomb and I found Thomas the Thermonuclear Apocalypse, I came looking for copper and I found gold. Also this is a work of fiction, any names that are placed in here are yadda yadda yadda you know the drill, anything in here is coincidental.)

AntiLoliLewding · Anime & Comics
Not enough ratings
325 Chs

Hello there

/Frank POV/

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{Well her duty is done, time for me to see that woman.} Frank thought to himself as he swiftly walked towards the Hephaestus Familia home manor, walking past the usual spots that he somewhat remembered, then he yet again forgot that he could just ask the system to direct him to the manor, so that's what he did. After about twenty or so minutes of walking he finally found the manor of the Hephaestus Familia Captain, now you nay be asking (Frank why are you looking for the Familia Captain? And why did you look for the Captain when you could just go straight for the goddess and get yourself a free waifu?). My answers include: Number 1: Fuck you I do what I want, Number 2: I went to meet with he Familia Captain cuz if I didn't I might get kicked out or even become a victim of attempted murder, and if I get accused for bullshit then this little trip was for nothing, also I sort of pity Tsubaki because of the bullshit her mom went through, like you fell in love with a dude and he finna leave yo ass in the dirt after stealing your super precious blacksmithing techniques, knocking you up with a kid and not paying child support, AND leaving you when YOU'RE FUCKING WEAK AF. Like what the actual fuck fam? You leaving hot ass all for another way you could hit a piece of hot metal?! Like bruh.

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Anyways, I then knock on the door of manor, which I just noticed wasn't a manor all this time but a goddamned personal workshop. Here's to my dumb ass going balls deep into shit yet again without proper thoughts as to what I wanna do. Well, here goes nothing I guess. I think to myself as the door opens and a very beautiful woman appears right in front of me, a strong blush very evident on her face, and her breath smelling like alcohol as she looked at me and asked me (Who are you and why did you come here?).

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/Tsubaki Collbrande POV/

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My name is Tsubaki Collbrande, I'm currently 37 years old, and I'm single. I live in a workshop that my Familia Goddess, Hephaestus, gave me for fostering my talent in blacksmithing. My mother was a woman from the Far East and my father was a bastard who left a woman alone, sick, and pregnant. I hated that piece of shit for ruining my mother's life, she couldn't be able to return back to her home land since she lost the ancient smithing techniques that came from her family. It was a cruel fate that she endured to let me live, and I loved her for it, and hated that conniving bastard for doing this to her. I learned her techniques straight from the word and I endured every hardship that she threw at me so that I would live happily, then one day, she succumbed to her ailments and died just like that. I never felt anything so painful in my life, not even touching freshly heated metal was as painful as this. But for her sake and mine, I pushed on, I finally got into a Familia and even became the Captain of the Familia after two decades, this was the high point in my life, I had contracts with a couple people for my gear, and I even have a personal record of getting to the 59th Floor inside the dungeon.

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But then, everything good changed when that man appeared, that man had turned a major part of my world upside down when he showed himself, and it hadn't even been a week when Gareth, a member of the Loki Familia and was a dwarf who had a very good contract with me, was severely injured in the battle for the 18th floor, heck, he didn't even get to the 18th without getting an attack from a goddamned monster, and from what I heard about it, it was a new one, stronger than your average Level 5 by a large margin, capable of fighting Level 6 adventurers and giving major damage, and supposedly capable of getting on a stalemate with a Level 7. The mere thought of something like that is scary in of itself, but the extra information that there were hundreds if not thousands of them occupying the dungeon, just makes you wanna think if you want to continue becoming an adventurer in the first place. I even started to have doubts as to whether or not if I wanted to quit altogether, but all of that faded away when I remembered what my mother taught me, to always strive for better, only when you've hit a hard spot is when you weigh your choices. I took those words to heart and decided for myself that I should get my attributes higher, so I got myself completely drunk for the night to sleep off the nerves, but all of a sudden I heard a knock on my door, I grumbled at the annoyance of having to deal with someone new and collected myself, I was barely wearing any clothes mind you, so whoever was at the door was going to get quite the surprise.

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/Back to Frank/

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(Umm, hello there, my name is Frank and I'd like to have a chat with you, Miss Collbrande.) Frank said to her as he reached out his hand for a handshake. (Yeah, yeah just tell me what you've come for and get the fuck out if you're wasting my time!) she spat out to Frank as he sighed at the antics of the lightly buzzed woman. (Miss Collbrande, I have a deal I want to make with you.) Frank said as Tsubaki's pupils went sharp as she said to Frank in an annoyed tone (No solicitors!) as she slammed the door closed right in front of Frank's face. Or that she tried, since Frank simply just put his foot in between the door and stopped her from closing it. She was starting to get very peeved at his antics before he took a serious tone and said to her (It concerns your life Miss Collbrande, if I may suggest, it would be in your best interests to listen to me right now if you wish to survive tomorrow.)

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Tsubaki heard what he said and stopped for a moment, and looked Frank straight into the eyes, seeing no lies in what he says, she breathed a sigh of exasperation as she lets him into her forge cum workshop hoping that this man, who had already showed that he had some amount of strength to him via the fact that he was able to handle a door being slammed by a Level 5 Blacksmith, blacksmiths in of themselves need to be strong to survive the heat of the forge and the fact that Tsubaki was a Level 5 Blacksmith meant that she had quite the strength. This man that she had let into her home was strange since he doesn't seem to act as if he was strong at all, it was as if he wanted to stay inconspicuous. Tsubaki shook this thought out of her head as she grabbed her clay jar of sake from her table and took a very large swig from it. She never really liked the taste of beer all that much, preferring the alcohol that her mother liked when she too, was a blacksmith. (Well then, you have quite the home Miss Collbrande, I would like to know if you're of sound mind right now before we begin, just a precaution so that there won't be any problems.) Frank said to Tsubaki as she snickered at what he said. (Of sound mind? Kid I'm going to the dungeon tomorrow, I'm getting shitfaced tonight so that I don't have to think all that much, is that good enough for you?) Tsubaki asked, trying to figure out how specifically this man got her name, and what he wanted with her.

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(I'm just asking Miss Collbrande, you may be a Half-Dwarf but I'm still going to ask about this just in case, since what I'm offering is based on the survival of your entire Familia.) he said as Tsubaki's eyes went wide at what Frank just said. She immediately grabbed Benishigure from the wall and brought it near his in a horizontal slash on for him to hold the blade back from his neck with his thumb and index. (Miss Collbrande, I mean no harm, but I will protect myself if I have to, and please, I'm not going to give you a deal that isn't beneficial to you, in fact, it would be something very interesting for you to take a listen.) Frank says as he chipped off a bit off of Benishigure and crushed it further, turning the once beyond-razor sharp blade piece into dust. (Now if you would be so kind as to take a minute, please take a seat, because you'll want to hear what I have to say.) Frank says as Tsubaki's eyes started to fill with fear as to what this man wanted. She then steeled her will and hid her fear as she asked Frank (Well then, go ahead. What is it you want with me and my Familia?) Frank heard her question as he sighed and took off his disguise and showed her the face that she saw along with her goddess.

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(Oh my god, it's you.) she says with fear as she remembered how his face looks, every black strand of hair that was there, and even those tempting red eyes.

(A/N I made him look like Sebastian Michaelis if any of you were wondering.)

She felt mesmerized when he revealed his face to her. (Well then, it concerns the fact that you are planning to go to my home, hoping to kill more of my subjects, that's a tad bit asshole-ish ain't it? What I would like to propose is a peace treaty between me and the Hephaestus Familia, this treaty includes you being able to get rare crafting resources straight from the dungeon without you needing to send out anybody or having to purchase them from the market with outlandish prices.) Frank said to her as she asked in reply (Then what do you get out of us?) Frank hearing this simply said (A teacher, more specifically, your goddess.)

1745 words, okay then, I am currently wrting this in the afternoon since I was really bored, but please leave suggestions as to where we want our man to go. I have some thoughts on Gourmet of Another World, Release that Witch, and BNHA. If there's any more places you might want Frank to go then please comment them below. Anyways and as always, I'll see you guys, on the dark side of the moon! Peace!

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