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Chapter 3: Struggling Against Sensation

I pushed my door shut and leaned against it, breathing heavily. I could still feel that strange yearning inside me, the desire Prince Leon had left there. A sharp cold sensation, a nervous tug. I had barely made it back to my rooms, fighting my desire every step of the way.

I buried my face in my hands, trying to hide the blush on my cheeks. This wasn't something I wanted. Or did I? Or was it just the Imperative making me want him? The feeling of his hands on me, light kisses on my neck, undoing his shirt, the pressure of him as he pushed me against the wall.

I shook my head clear of the images. This was the Imperative. I had to fight it for as long as I could. Taking a couple shaky deep breaths, I stood before my mirror and tried to straighten my appearance.

The uniforms for the maids are rough. Dark colored skirts and matching tops, short sleeves and just enough of a dip at the neck to tease the imagination. Black stockings underneath it all. Someone with clear tastes had designed them. I wondered if it was Prince Leon.

The Imperative pulsed inside me again. I flooded with warmth and sensation, sinking to my knees. I had to go to his room. I wanted to go to his room and I needed to do what was asked of me there.

Carefully, I took several deep breaths and the feeling gradually subsided. A whole night of this? How long could I resist it? Should I get go and get it over with? But what sorts of commands would he give me when I got there?

How had I gotten myself into this situation? An orphan didn't have all the options in the world, but surely I could have found work somewhere safer. Like a diamond mine. Or as a target for archery practice. But no, the castle staff had seemed welcoming, the assurances of food and housing too tempting to turn down. Now everything felt hazy and frightening, like a nightmare you couldn't quite wake up from.

I put my hands on the wooden floor, feeling the cold grain of the wood. It grounded me. It would be alright. There were certainly worse things that could happen to you. The old king had used the Imperative to punish his people, ordering them to run for miles without water or rest. And I was upset because the Prince wanted what--to sleep with me? My stomach flipped at the thought of his hungry eyes, his broad shoulders. The Imperative warmed inside me. Things could definitely by worse.

I thought about Minerva. I tried to picture her sitting on the edge of her bed, contemplating the death of her father. For some reason, it eased the cravings.

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed something strange. Peeking out from the dark beneath my bed was an old book, stuffed with notes and ribbons. I didn't recognize it. Had the maid who used my room previously left it here?

I pulled the book to me and opened it. From within its pages, lines and lines of scribbled gibberish stared out at me. Sentences trailed off into nonsense, words were misspelled, paragraphs were written sideways, upside down, and backwards. In one margin, someone had sketched a detailed picture of a butterfly, then written beneath it in careful lettering 'This is me.'

"What the hell?" I asked aloud, turning the pages. I lifted the book up and one note slipped from the rest to fall into my lap. I unfolded it. It read: 'Behind the mirror, kick the third stone from the floor.'

I looked up at the mirror, then back at the note. Was this a trick? Some game the other servants wanted to play on the new girl? Prince Leon's Imperative pulsed inside me again. I shivered and wrapped my arms around myself, riding the waves of desire. Go to him. Serve him. Do everything he wanted me to do. Give him everything.

No, the servants in this castle were united against a common enemy.

When the sensation had faded to a dull ache, I stood and pulled the mirror aside. I counted up and kicked the third stone as hard as I could. To my surprise, it shifted. Something clicked within the wall, and a whole section of stones swung inward to reveal a dark passage beyond.

I poked my head through the doorway. Tunnels extended in three different directions, each snaking along the interior of the castle walls. What was this? I had heard rumors that Andan castle was full of mysteries, but I had never imagined anything like these secret passageways.

A sharp rapping on the door of my room drew my senses back to reality. I pulled away and quickly shut the secret entrance, dragging my mirror back to its original place.

"Come in," I called out in what I hoped was a normal-sounding voice.

A guard entered. He was tall, wearing basic leather armor and a sword at his belt. He fixed me with a tired, anxious stare. (Are you Eve?) he signed, (we are investigating the king's death, and I heard you were the one to find...)

I shivered through another surge of sensation as Prince Leon's order pulled on my body.

"Yes, I'm Eve" I said, offering a light curtsy.

The guard read my lips and gave a heavy sigh. (He's ordered you for the evening, hasn't he? I've seen my fare share of maids shaking like that.)

Something treacherous inside of me twinged in jealousy. I stuffed it down. "Can I help with the investigation somehow?"

(The nobles want to see you.)

Prince Leon wanted me already? The Imperative roared with delight; my thighs shook. "I'll go to him right away," I said.

(No--) the guard held out his hand-- (his younger brothers. Prince Xander and Prince Matthias. The twins.)

"The twins?" I squeaked. The general staff was not supposed to speak to the nobility, and here I was meeting all four royal children in the same day. And the king. Technically speaking.

The guard nodded. He turned to leave, then gave me one last sympathetic glance. (Be careful,) he signed, (they can be far, far worse than their brother.)