Chapter 92 : Confessions.

Farah inhaled deeply, bracing herself for the answer, "Did… did you ...did you two use protection while doing, Ava?"

Ava's eyes widened, a flicker of panic crossing her face. "Not yet… not yet… we didn't do it… it's just…" her voice trailed off, her hand instinctively going to the scarf, as if to shield the evidence beneath.

Farah understood. The "not yet" hung heavy in the air, a loaded silence that spoke volumes. It meant they were on the precipice, a breath away from consummating their desires, and Ava, despite her conflicting emotions, wasn't entirely averse to it. She held a secret desire in her heart.

"I got it," Farah interrupted softly, sensing Ava's rising panic. "You don't have to be specific. Just be careful Ava for later. I'm not your enemy." It would not be good if some unwanted accident happened in the meantime. 

Farah watched Ava crumble, the tears tracing glistening tracks down her cheeks like fallen stars. Her heart ached for her friend, the weight of Ava's unspoken love a heavy cloak upon her shoulders. "It's okay, Ava," she murmured, pulling her into a tight embrace. "You don't have to be specific. 

Ava buried her face in Farah's shoulder, her body wracked with sobs that had been pent up for far too long. And Farah held her close, "Don't worry, Ava. I promise I'll find a way to make Elara understand."

Ava pulled away, her eyes were wide. "No, Farah, please," Ava pleaded, her voice trembling. "Don't tell Elara anything, not yet. I…"

Farah's brow furrowed in concern. "But why? What if Elara… what if he understands, approves of your relationship?"

Ava shook her head, the fear in her voice echoing. "No, Farah. Elara will hate Ibrahim even more. They'll be enemies."

Farah sighed. "Then how can things ever be alright, Ava?" she asked gently. "Hiding your feelings, denying your heart? How long can you keep this charade going?"

Ava hiccupped, a fresh wave of tears washing over her. "I… I try, Farah, I really do. But...." She choked back a sob, her hands clutching at the fabric of Farah's shirt. "The more I push him away, the closer he gets. He cares for me like no one else ever has."

The words tumbled out, a torrent of emotions she'd dammed for days. "He calls me 'baby girl', Farah. Before, I hated that phrase. It reeked of possessiveness, of control. But now… now I wait for it. I wait for him to whisper it in my ear, for it to wash over me like a warm wave. It's like… like he's speaking the language of my soul...I wait for his hand to brush mine, for his eyes to hold mine captive. It melts my defenses, makes me forget everything. His every touch, every smile, it chips away at the walls I've built around my heart. His hands… they're gentle, Farah. So gentle....."

Ava buried her face in Farah's arms, the sobs racking her body. "I shouldn't love him, Farah. I promised Elara… and yet here I am, drowning in these forbidden feelings. I'm falling, Farah, falling so hard, and I don't know how to stop it. I thought he was ....he was a monster. But I was wrong. He's kind, he's funny, he's everything I never knew I needed. He treats me like I'm the most precious thing in the world, like I'm made of glass. He makes me forget everything Elara's disapproval, my promise, the guilt gnawing at my soul. I'm just Ava, lost in the warmth of his presence."

A shudder wracked her body, the memory of his touch sending a tremor through her. "But then," she whispered, her voice barely audible, "then the reality crashes down. I remember the vows I made, the promise I broke. And I…" her voice hitched, a sob wracking her slender frame. "I push him away. I build walls around myself, thicker, taller with each passing day. But he… he just breaks them down with a smile, a gentle word, a look that sends my heart into freefall."

"Farah.....he makes my heart beat like a drum solo… and the worst part…" Ava stopped, taking a shuddering breath.

"What is it, darling?" Farah urged. 

Ava looked up, her eyes were red. "The worst part is," she whispered, "now… I crave his touch. Just when I swear I'll never let him near me, I find myself longing for his hand in mine, his breath against my skin. I… I want him, Farah. God, how I want him. The way he holds me, the way he makes me feel safe and cherished. Even when I close my eyes, all I can see is him… his brown eyes, his strong jawline, the way his hair falls over his forehead. Just a hand on my shoulder, a brush of his fingers against my arm… it sends shivers down my spine. It ignites a fire within me that I can barely control. I used to hate his touch, remember? I loathed his forced kisses, his unwanted closeness. But now… now I crave it. I hunger for it, Farah. I want him… all of him. I told myself again and again.....again and again....I wouldn't allow him near me, wouldn't let him cross that line. But his hands… they have a way of finding mine, of sending shivers down my spine with their gentle caress. His warmth seeps into my bones, chasing away the loneliness that used to chill me from within. I want him so much it hurts. My body burns for him." 

"It's alright, Ava," Farah whispered, stroking her hair in a comforting rhythm. "Let it out, cry it all out. Sometimes, the only way to face your demons is to acknowledge their existence. But I know one thing. You can't keep ignoring your heart. It's screaming for him, can't you hear it?"

Ava nodded, tears streaming down her face. "I hear it, Farah. All the time. And it scares me more than anything... I want him..... I want my Ibrahim. Just once… just one night… to forget everything and lose myself in him. But I can't, Farah. I can't betray Elara, I can't hurt him. The guilt will destroy me. What am I supposed to do?"

Ava continued, "I'm a mess, Farah. I'm a mess.....I'm a tangled mess of guilt and desire, love and hate. I don't know what to do, where to turn. I'm drowning in this sea of emotions, and I don't know how to swim. I love him, Farah. I truly, deeply love him. I never… never allowed anyone to touch me in a way that made my heart skip a beat, my breath catch in my throat. Not even… not even before the marriage. And now, I want to feel alive, loved, desired… by him. I love him, Farah.... I love him. My heart....it belongs to him, whether I like it or not."

The hours melted into each other. Ava, drained from the emotional outpouring, slumped against Farah, her head finding solace in her friend's lap. Time blurred, tears dried, and a quiet sadness settled over them.

Farah, her fingers weaving through Ava's hair, watched her friend sleep and a knot of worry in her stomach. She would help Ava, guide her through this tangled mess, even if it meant defying Elara's expectations. Ava deserved a chance at happiness, a chance to love and be loved, without fear or guilt.

When the doorbell finally rang, shattering the quiet stillness. With a gentle touch, Farah shifted Ava's head onto a pillow and went to answer the door.

Ibrahim stood on the threshold, "What's Ava doing?"

Farah ushered him inside, a reassuring smile playing on her lips. "Sleeping, just tired from our girl talk. We haven't seen each other in ages."

Farah guided Ibrahim into her room. Her flatmates were thankfully engrossed in their own activities in their own room. Ibrahim found Ava curled up on the bed, her face streaked with dried tears.

Ibrahim's eyes narrowed, a knot of worry twisting in his gut. He turned to Farah, his voice gruff. "What happened? Was she crying?"

"Yeah, we were catching up. Sometimes, old wounds need a little… airing out." Farah replied.

He found her answer strangely evasive, but with Ava asleep, there was little he could do to probe further. With a quick thank you to Farah for taking care of Ava, he scooped his wife into his arms and left the apartment,