3
When the moon shone at its brightest, all of the serfs went out of their cruck houses, talking to each other, bringing tables, and inviting each other for dinner. Some were reading others were dancing. Kids were jumping around, playing with their small sparkling toys. Others were singing their favorite songs. In fact, moments like these made the entire town enjoy their youth under the dim moonlight. What was common, however, was that deep within them, they all had the same wish. That, of the moon never would go away. That maybe this time, this time, only for once, it will leave a little fragment of light that they will keep and plant, so it will grow into a tree of lightness which its fruits they can share as well as their food.
Many of the serfs resembled in their manner of behavior. All of them were quit and never wanted to ask each other personal things. The most desired thing, however, was a light to lighten the darkness of their thoughts. True that the sentiments they expressed were nothing but a projection of their thoughts. Deep within them they all had the same beating heart that is overwhelmed with love and affection. How much they loved to stare at the bright moon when it twinkled in that starry sky. Full of dreams and passioned about realizing them, even if it meant becoming a shadow casted on the surface of the earth.
These earthly creatures wanted to obtain something to call theirs. A straw to hold on to in the midst of this blackout. Yet, the blackout was progressive and led straight towards fainting by losing their consciousness bit by bit. This process resembled the apple pies they are used to share with each other. These apples would freshen for the entire week, to soar by the end of it. And not much to eat then except for dried crests. No wonder most of the serfs needed something else to satisfy their hunger, so they drank milk the entire days of the week. But progressively, days became night and nights became days. The serfs were losing their appetite, and becoming less interested in the dishes offered by life.
A cruel life in which they were losing the taste of living. How much they wanted to find a luminesce sky, at the end of this somber dream. How much they needed to establish their dream of a faraway lust. It is undeniable that all lusts are fatal and the only thing to remain stable is the sight of a sky that does not fulfill to find a surface that pacifies rather than tortures. But, being comfortable around here is close to impossible since nothing is stable and all can be a vivid dream as well as a reality. The events taking place around them are close to an impossibility, or rather a nightmare that the serfs have no idea how to wake up from, or rather opt out of.
They wanted something called a world and all they got is just a galaxy. So, they dreamt since dreams are allowed. When the days express something fatal rather than lasting, the only thing to admit to themselves is how weak their resistance is to something called life. The flow of days was passible but its echo was too loud to be muted. Since it screamed fragility and capitalized it in every passing hour. How were the hours there?
The serfs looked at the clock and did not see if it had any other hour other than the one, they were living in. Existing within a timeframe that meant only one thing; this is a dull reality that they have to endure for the next, probably, lifetimes. It is affirmative to say that it was a horrific reality and its events are only thickened by the layers on doubt. So, they doubted and it is no surprise that their dream never came true. Since, it is only written in the stars, yet the sky is too somber to notice anything at all. Most certainly, reading their destiny is hardened by the dark color of the sky. Only at nights, it would become visible so they would read that there is something still to exist. Somewhere far away from the one they inhabit only a body. Since their soul is perished by sentimentality to be rationalized by a reckless brain in its search for stability. Still their pursuit did mean something, only when there is a certain belief somewhere, the dream might become closer to obtainable.
At that moment, Robert left his family's house and was going toward his grandfather's, which was four streets away from his. When he rode his bicycle, he looked back and noticed this ominously huge sphere of light called the moon and notified;
- "how lovely the moon shone today!"
The sight of his grandfather flashed in front of his eyes at that moment and how much he wished he would see the delightful view. So, he fastened to ride his bicycle when the moon still shines with that beautiful ecstasy. Numerous thoughts came to Robert's mind at that moment. When the air swept his face and he was quick to remember, the smell of love. The way his mother used to express her love to him and hold him tight in her arms, when he was a little boy. Moments like that surely made even the stars envious of such tenderness. He thought maybe the wholesome of such moments of delicacy made the stars envious for the tenderness of the love they could not provide for him. He thought about the possibilities and what if they become a reality. Yet, it was real and still impossible.
In the ecstasy of the dream everything seemed possible. Since the night only lengthened to be shortened once again. The stars shone the brightest when he admitted to his senses that they actually have an essence, or rather a source to be chased. Robert never lost faith in finding something that would look like an end. He wanted to reach a conclusion, by writing something now that would be close to an introduction. But, how to introduce himself to a galaxy, while he is one of the earth's stars seed? It is something to tell though since his color shone the brightest among all of the other serfs. So, it is very clear to distinguish his hope from the shells of despair fragmented here and there on the dry soil of the earth.
All of the Brandt's neighbors knew light still awaits, but they never really knew that it was next door. They did see Robert every single day watering the tulips in front of their house. They did also see him wandering around alone in search for his family whom he surely still misses. He stood away as a lonely star admiring a sky which was too fragmented to be considered whole. He wanted to call something and actually get a response rather than a denial. He only wandered how would other children look like, if he only knew any one of them. He questioned his senses; if a light still exists somewhere out there in the world. And if magic is still realizable and less conditioned then it actually is, or rather has always been.
Robert remembered a time when he first saw a sky whose light was not bound by a surface. It was also during his childhood days when his thoughts used to consider the possibility of death and never consider it as a human fate. It is something undeniable since it shapes but still rejects to be shaped. This happening is only manifested at daylight whose light became too fragmented to become complete. The sudden incomplete knowing, got Robert's thoughts to be liberated at daylight only to be tamed at the end of the night by an untamed beast called reality. This beast's name is well-capitalized in the notes of those who chose to call it an angel in the manifest. And it is a vivid truth noticed even from miles away. Since its shine is too radiant not to be astonished by its amplitude. The way it shone too brightly capitalizing one meaning that was never drafted since it meant something. But all drafts have to be disordered and most certainly meaningless. True that numerous things can be disordered and still have a meaning.
This concept is also noticed in people and specifically the youth. When they tend to shape a dream that is bigger than their expectations. This ends up shaping their entire life and even sets their way of living. Across the twenty years Robert has spent in his family's house, the only fact he has come to admit to himself is how temporary everything is. How fragile the light of existence is, which can be put off with just a single blow. He did know this by now since it has become a fact to be acknowledged. His attempts to twist around the truth by calling it a lie and denying the bells that it rings in his passage. Screaming out loud; "this is a reality," and he foolishly responded, "only to run from". So, he ran away to hide in the corners of his mind for reality would never rub him from his youth.
It is atrocious but he was meant to rationalize it, at least for now. True that the present moment went beyond the borders of love. This does not deny that his eyes can still wander around heaven in search of a way out of the boredom of reality. Sadly, the present moment is real and its echoes are too loud to be silenced by the sound of love. The numerous elements the young Robert has loved and his family is always at the top of the chart. He most certainly was an admirer of the lions and wished so heartfully to see one of them in the parks. One day, only one day all of his dreams would come true.
He looked behind him again to see if the stars were still there and how surprised he was to see none. He stepped off his bicycle to stare at the sky and notice only the dimness of its color. Its color did not seem to break, or even fragment no matter how many times he wished it would. It did not break and stayed right there for his eyes to testify to the fragility of his wishes. But, what can humans do in front of such magic? Robert was an admirer of magic even if it was dark magic. The one he was seeing was far from being real and yet the sound of his heart insisted to convince his mind that it is far from being what it desired.
It desired a mansion of love, a photograph that portrays what belonging looks like, and a song whose lyrics would sound like acceptance. He wanted, or rather his heart to imagine anything other than this. He sought by gazing at the somber sky and sadly it did not break. How much he wished that the light of his soul would lighten such a dim sky, but it did not. The color was too persistent and seemed to persist even more the harder he tried to break it down into small pieces. So, he imagined it would fade away after a sacred walk of belief. And in his core of heart, he was more than sure, that it would be a very long walk. Where his heart might lose its beat to disordered events that screamed; "get out of this land".
How much he wanted to reside right there in front of the ominous moon and pray to God it would never go away. That the moon would wait for its lover to get back in his arms. For them to curse the day misfortune declared its arrival and try to remember if the sky was ever theirs to lose. But, losing is a temporary act shortened by the belief of a better avenir. A dimension that does not resemble the one they reside in, and rejects the embodiment of its space. Therefore, it extends to become whole and still occupies a fragmented creature who never considered to be called again by its first name. Still, life called its one and only light to be found here who is still searching for something, or rather someone to call his.
- "The sky is mine," he said so fondly to rationalize the beats of his heart to settle and admit that this is far from being real.
He looked around him once again seeing the serfs getting back to their houses after they finished drinking an uncountable number of bottles of milk, and ate the crests off last night's apple pies. He did also see the heavy weight of disappointment being dragged in every step they made. And, it is to be said that reality could never be louder since their eyes could never be sadder. Robert thought of the possibility of getting back to his parent's house and forgetting about the happening of this forbidden dream. Such a thought was quick to be obeyed by his body when his feet rushed to ride the bicycle again. But still, his feet froze and rejected moving.
Far seemed to be close and to go away meant to reside somewhere at the end of the road. By now, all places looked the same to be differentiated from one another. Days became too repetitive and the sky never seemed to crumble down for infinity to be seen again. Robert thought about the meaning the word infinity held. The thought of it made his heart enliven in total bliss. What a blessing it is to consider the outcome of something so realizable. Yet, its realization is too conditioned to be realized so fast and too soon. He thought that the best thing to do is to just ignore the present moment. By trying to neutralize its shades of dullness since he preferred all shades of radiant colors of blue. It is a vibe not to be tamed by its lack of vibration. The atmosphere around him did not really have much significance in its features to actually signify something. The meaning of it all was hidden somewhere beneath the layers of doubt.
He did not want to doubt himself in a land that is believed to be a mansion of lost souls. Yet, the heavy wings of the somber night hardened the loosening of its doubters for them to see that there is actually light out there, or rather among them. Robert chose at that moment to stay and enliven again. By voicing the sound of his heart in a loud chant that only his mind heard. How sad it is that this light of his was not projected on the surface of the earth. He biked away toward his grandfather's house seeing the serfs disappearing in the folds of the most somber nights.