Self-reflection

"Cut, cut, cut!" Tony's carefree shout echoed, followed by hearty laughter. "It's over, finally over, cut! Everyone, take a break. Haha, we're done, of course, we're done, as soon as we left the bus, we were done. Where's Renly? Renly, come back quickly, Renly?"

Tony was a true eternal child. After being satisfied with the scene they had just shot, he started showing off, wanting to share his joy with the world, expressing his excitement with his entire being. He was so engrossed in his own celebration that he didn't notice the eerie silence that had fallen over the crew.

His cheerful voice rang through the streets in the early morning, spreading like a tide. Renly, Sami, and the cameraman had just walked back from the darkness, following the sparse lamplights, and reappeared in front of the crew members.

The crew instinctively made way for them, spontaneously clearing a path without any discussion, as if rolling out a red carpet to welcome the triumphant return of the three. The hesitant, timid, yet respectful and admiring gazes were concentrated on Renly, and without words, those gazes conveyed all the emotions.

Subtly, Renly could feel something unusual. Those burning eyes spread through the midnight air, the cool temperature rising inconspicuously, but it left him perplexed. He scanned the surroundings, puzzled by everyone avoiding his gaze, surrounded by question marks.

So, Renly sent Roy and Nathan an inquiring look. Both of them responded with enthusiastic applause, no words needed, but their praise was evident. Still, they couldn't answer Renly's question.

However, these trivial matters were unimportant. They could be set aside for now because there were more important things to attend to.

Amid the attention, Renly made his way to the back of the monitor. Without waiting for him to approach fully, Tony rushed forward and gave Renly a tight hug, his enthusiasm uncontainable. He wore a brilliant smile on his face, and his bright eyes scrutinized Renly as he asked, "How do you feel? Are you okay?"

After such a spectacular and emotionally complex performance, any actor would be pushed to their physical and mental limits.

However, in reality, Renly's condition was quite good. This was one of the fundamental differences between expressive and method actors.

After the performance, Renly merely felt tired, without falling into an uncontrollable state. His mind remained clear, and he had a thorough understanding of the entire context and process of the performance they had just completed. His emotional state didn't fluctuate as drastically as his character's.

It was precisely because of this that expressive actors could play multiple roles in a single scene without deviation, while method actors found it challenging to do so.

In the year 2016, within the low-budget sensation that wowed the box office, "Split", James McAvoy played a character with twenty-four personalities, allowing him to fully unleash his acting skills. James' performance was decent, given his background in the British Academy, but it didn't stand out significantly. The differences between the personalities were quite clear, yet they lacked depth and seemed to exist solely for the sake of showcasing his acting prowess. This resulted in a disconnect between the character and the script, and the latter half of the film became increasingly absurd.

However, Renly felt that his self-assessment of the recent scene had met his expectations. Still, he needed to confirm how it appeared on the screen and whether there were any discrepancies. So, his first goal was to reach the monitor, watch the playback, engage in meticulous self-examination, and make any necessary adjustments, a crucial learning process for method actors.

"Very good," Renly nodded at Tony and gave a slight smile. "I'm fine. Let's watch the playback first. How did the scene we just shot turn out?"

"Perfect!" Tony didn't hesitate to offer the highest praise. "I finally understand what you meant. This is the right way." Tony smiled warmly at Sami. "Your performance was also outstanding!"

Sami still felt somewhat uneasy. After experiencing the performance of the previous scene, she was a bit confused and hadn't quite grasped the situation. Her body and mind felt more exhausted than ever, and this sensation left her feeling disoriented. But she didn't have the luxury of time to alleviate this weariness now, as there were more important matters at hand.

"However..." Sami hesitated, her voice trembling slightly as she spoke, "I didn't follow the script during my performance."

The crew had been filming for over two weeks, and everyone knew that Tony disliked actors improvising and altering the script, especially when it came to their lines. While she hadn't changed her lines, the pacing and framework of her performance had completely deviated from the original, leaving her feeling lost.

Not only the initial part with the interlocking glances as they raised their heads, but also the moment she was slapped and had a brief eye exchange with Henry, and finally, when she stood up, the emotional shifts and physical sensations—all of it had been altered without authorization.

In summary, the entire scene had deviated significantly. Apart from the lines, there was no aspect that followed the expected path, especially the three instances of eye contact, which were not in the script at all. So, what should she do now?

Sami swallowed hard, trying to conceal her nervousness as she stole a glance at Renly.

She didn't know what had come over her, as if she had been possessed. She deeply felt the overpowering aura that emanated from Henry, and the pull of his gaze had caused her to lose complete control. Her performance had flowed naturally, as though it had always been intended that way. The feeling of being unable to control herself yet remaining in command had left her with a blank mind. She couldn't even remember how she had performed.

But she couldn't blame Renly for it, could she? Could she really claim that it was his fault that her performance had deviated so far from the script just because his gaze was so intense? That sounded like a fantastical excuse.

"I, um, I just felt that this way of performing was right," Sami said timidly, her voice trembling uncontrollably, and she was on the verge of tears. After repeating the same scene sixty-nine times, if her deviation led to its downfall, she would truly feel guilty to the point of death.

"No worries. Let's take a look at the playback first," Tony waved his hand dismissively, then turned around and walked side by side with Renly, getting ready to review the scene.

Sami stood still for a moment, unable to react immediately: What had just happened? Then she saw Tony turning around and gesturing for her to follow. Sami temporarily suppressed her chaotic thoughts and quickly approached, filled with unease and confusion as she looked at the monitor.

As a participant in the performance and now an observer, these were two completely different perspectives. Sami's gaze couldn't shift away from Renly. His concise performance had nothing flashy about it, but it emanated rich emotions from within, injecting a unique charm into the entire scene. His powerful presence held her attention.

Thinking of Henry, then Renly, and Henry again, Sami could hardly believe her eyes. It was the same person, yet he exuded completely different qualities on and off-screen. The genuine and unadorned performance was unrefined and primal, yet under Tony's pseudo-documentary lens, it ignited a heart-pounding appeal.

"...Sami?" Suddenly, a voice interrupted her thoughts. Sami looked up in a fluster and saw Tony's perplexed expression. "I was just asking, why did you perform this way? Here, I mean."

Sami finally realized that she and Renly were in the same shot, which she hadn't noticed earlier. She quickly swallowed hard and asked, "Um, which part? Could you replay it?"

Tony didn't hesitate and immediately started the playback again.

After the playback finished, Sami felt both Tony and Renly's gazes directed at her. "Um, I just felt... Renly's gaze. It was more like an instinctive reaction. But, uh, I don't think he deserves attention. Money is more important than some other stranger."

Sami said in a fragmented manner, almost running out of breath. She then tightly closed her mouth, holding her breath, and looked at the two men in front of her. Afterward, she heard Tony's laughter. "It seems like this is your doing." Tony nodded at Renly and continued, "Your gaze was spot on. The eye contact between you and Henry made the scene richer. That's a good thing. I'm just a bit surprised. Are you sure this is your first film? Your handling of it is quite seasoned."

Praise was received.

Sami quickly looked at Renly, gaining even more encouragement from his smile. She felt like she was floating on air. "It's all thanks to Renly. Actually, I'm not sure what I was doing. I just felt that aura and followed Renly's performance, continuing from there. I'm not sure if what I did was right..."

"You did great," Renly nodded gently, expressing approval. Sami felt like her whole being was about to take flight. Her performance had an inherent impulsiveness, driven by intuition without refinement or embellishment. Some details in her expressions might have seemed awkward, but it was precisely this rawness that naturally suited the character of Erica. Moreover, during the performance, she didn't rigidly follow the script but made adjustments accordingly, which was especially commendable.

"If you pay attention to some details, it can be even better," Renly's words left Tony momentarily stunned. However, Sami, who was standing beside him, nodded repeatedly, her face showing an eager-to-learn expression, making Tony chuckle helplessly.