Eating one's words

The atmosphere in the room had taken on a subtle quality.

The delicate and authentic performance unfolded like a few scattered clouds against the backdrop of a clear blue sky. They drifted and unfurled with the gentle caress of a light breeze, leaving faint traces as they painted across the vast canvas of the sky, sketching a grand panorama.

Human nature tends to be shortsighted, often captivated by the immediate waves of shock while disregarding the vastness of the entire composition. So much so that, when truly glimpsing the entirety, the grandeur of towering mountains and expansive plains can freeze the soul.

Through two acts, Renly had only required two performances to demonstrate the essence of aiming high despite humble origins.

Between these two consecutive performances, spanning less than twenty minutes, emerged two distinct styles with a stark contrast, offering divergent interpretations and renditions of the same character. This allowed the audience to feel the power of acting from all angles.

There was an outward fierceness, an internal subtlety; an external rush, a reserved aftertaste; a forceful surge, a delicate complexity. The same character, the same setting, the same situation—different performances bestowed distinct meanings upon the plot. More importantly, they breathed varied life into the character.

Renly's initial performance had already astonished the audience, fully displaying the profound emotions of receiving a cancer diagnosis. There were no wailing cries, yet within those eyes lay the vast upheaval of a world falling apart. Beneath the surface of her muscles, like thunderous pressure held back, there was no leakage, yet it brought an unparalleled impact.

This allowed the audience to deeply experience the vast fluctuations between life and death. The term "cancer" was so light, yet so heavy. Only those who had truly endured the torment and agony of cancer could sense the flavor of surviving on the edge of hell's suffering. Naturally, only those who had received a death notice could understand the despair of standing on the cliff's edge, condemned to death.

Everyone agreed that Renly's first performance showcased her prowess. The success of "Buried" and "Like Crazy" was no fluke. This emerging actress had delivered a powerful performance that balanced explosiveness with depth. It wasn't a crude roar-style performance; it displayed the madness of survival with authenticity.

This was the pinnacle. Almost everyone present felt the same way. No one thought Renly could surpass this performance. However, they soon felt the burning pain on their cheeks, a slap that was swift, decisive, and resolute.

Renly's second performance was beyond astonishing—it was indescribable. The moment of confusion and panic, the fleeting tension and unease, the hesitation and bewilderment in the face of harsh reality—all of these feelings, light and gentle, yet intense and tumultuous, flooded their chests, leaving them breathless.

This wasn't just shocking; it was life itself.

The genuine pain and bitterness spread across their tongues, making it hard to bear. No one truly knew what cancer signified, as it remained unfamiliar to each person. No one truly knew what cancer could change, as it remained unknown to every life. Yet they understood that the path ahead, filled with thorns, could only be traversed by a very few.

The composed yet nuanced performance felt terrifyingly real. It seemed as though every person had experienced the moment of a "cancer diagnosis". Wave after wave, the emotions swelled and surged. At first, they didn't notice, but when their minds caught up, the torrent of emotions made it hard to breathe. It was then they realized the confusion and loss within their thoughts, unsure of what to do.

There were no tears, no cries, not even sounds—just the bitterness lingering in their mouths. And a sense of being lost. In a mere instant, the future seemed to plunge into darkness.

Compared to the previous performance, the second act raised the bar even higher. That performance, so immersive and captivating, allowed everyone to share in the experience. They felt as though they had lived through a moment that Will Rutherford had once lived. Within those deep brown eyes, no traces of acting could be found.

The stifling sensation in their chests was almost suffocating.

Anna and Bryce exchanged a glance, realizing the shared embarrassment that lurked in the depths of each other's eyes. They awkwardly averted their gazes simultaneously.

A profound silence filled the entire room, yet Anna could feel her cheeks burning with pain. They had underestimated Renly. Or perhaps, they hadn't even reached Renly's level.

They thought they were merely bystanders, believed they were gloating, and assumed they held the moral high ground. Little did they know, they were nothing more than frogs in a well. Their speculations, suspicions, and mockery were nothing more than a joke in Renly's eyes.

Anna recalled the moment when Renly re-entered the room. He hadn't scrutinized others or sought their gazes. He had simply gone straight to his place and resumed reading the script. It was all about the character, solely about the character. His intense focus and dedication made her blush and feel embarrassed.

No words were needed; they were utterly convinced.

Raising her head, Anna noticed that it wasn't just her and Bryce. Everyone in the cast had looked away, pretending as if they hadn't participated in the gossip just now. However, a thoughtful glint in their eyes betrayed their true emotions. How ridiculous, how absurd.

But what about Renly?

Renly remained in place, immersed in the thoughts of his performance. There was no intention of throwing stones at them. Strictly speaking, Anna even wondered if Renly had noticed their observation and emotional shifts. Perhaps, to Renly, everything except acting was just a backdrop, devoid of significance.

"Cut!" Jonathan's voice finally broke the silence, a relief for the crew. Many regained their senses and pretended to leave the room to keep themselves busy, but then they heard Jonathan's words, "Let's watch the playback."

The footsteps of everyone involuntarily halted. They were conflicted. Should they stay and watch the performance they had just witnessed again? Or should they pretend nothing had happened and avoid it?

Seth was the first to make a decision. He immediately came to the back of the monitor, patting Jonathan's shoulder, urging, "Hurry up, hurry up."

As an actor, Seth's understanding of performance was limited. He had no idea how Renly had achieved that. But as a producer, Seth had his unique interpretation and control over the style of the entire production.

Seth needed to confirm his speculation, hence his impatience. Yet he didn't forget. He raised his head and called out, "Renly, are you joining us?"

Renly didn't turn around. He simply waved his hand, indicating that he needed a little more time. Then, Seth and Jonathan began to watch the playback.

The short playback ended quickly. All the crew members stood behind, silent and speechless.

However, Seth's mood soared because his conjecture had been confirmed.

Indeed, Renly's performance was more than just intentionally restrained. He ensured that his entire performance style aligned better with the comedic nature of the film. He slightly adjusted his approach, departing from the heaviness and complexity of dramatic cinema. He infused the performance with more comedy, lightness, and pauses. He also altered the emotional content, fundamentally changing the core idea of the performance.

Astonishment!

Beyond astonishment, there was only astonishment! Seth sincerely felt he had struck gold. Even if Renly was a bit difficult to work with, even if his cooperative attitude was questionable, even if he was overly meticulous about professionalism, what of it? As long as Renly could deliver such a performance, and even improve upon it, they would welcome him with open arms.

A humbling experience?

There was no need for Renly to humble them; Seth was ready to do it himself. He had to admit he had underestimated Renly's dedication and professionalism. More importantly, he had underestimated Renly's acting prowess. Based solely on the scene they had just witnessed, the overall quality of "50/50" had taken a significant leap.

It truly was a windfall!

Seth turned towards Will and gave his friend a big hug. Will came back to his senses, pushing Seth away disdainfully. But Seth didn't mind; he grinned and said, "A wise choice, undoubtedly a wise choice!"

It had been Will who insisted on choosing Renly in the beginning.

However, Will wasn't patting himself on the back; he knew Renly's capabilities and believed in his talent. He was glad that Renly had taken on this role. Yet, Will soon realized something was amiss. He nudged Seth, then nodded in the direction of Renly, who was still standing in place, staring thoughtfully out of the window.

Worry filled Will's gaze. Seth scratched his head, puzzled by the situation. Had Renly gotten too immersed in his role? What should they do?

Renly was indeed deeply absorbed in his role. The confusion he felt was like an endless ocean. Regardless of how he tried to change direction, he couldn't see an end. Even if he wanted to move forward, he didn't know how to take the first step. The power of the term "terminal illness" was too overwhelming. It held his heart captive, making it impossible to break free. Yet, it was also too vast, leaving him unsure of where to begin.

Chu Jiashu felt this way. Will felt this way. Adam felt this way.

Renly's mind was in turmoil, making it hard to think clearly. He knew this state was correct, yet it made thinking difficult. This was also why he hadn't turned to watch the playback. He needed a moment to clear his mind; otherwise, even after watching the playback, his mind would remain blank.

Standing in place, Renly unconsciously reached into his pocket and found the cigarette he had earlier. He pulled it out but didn't put it in his mouth. Instead, he held the filter between his index finger and thumb, tapping the cigarette gently against his palm. Occasionally, a few flecks of tobacco fell off. A faint scent of smoke lingered around his palm.

Gradually, his emotions began to settle. Life had to go on, even if the endpoint was death. Before reaching that point, he couldn't stand still, right?

So, he took a deep breath, turned around, put the cigarette back into his pocket, and walked towards Seth and Jonathan. "How was the performance just now?" This time, even without watching the playback, Renly had a good sense of it.

Jonathan seemed unprepared for this question. He paused for a moment and then gave Renly a thumbs-up, his face filled with admiration.