Chapter 18-Final Words
To think I've survived multiple bullets and knives stabs through my body and even bombs that have exploded right before my eyes but in the end I would go out because of measly truck. *Sigh* I guess this is the retribution I get for killing a countless amount of people
Even though non of them were innocent, murder is still considered a sin no matter who it is. With all the stuff I've done in my life, I really don't have the right to complain about dying right now and I just have to accept it
Heh, Karma is a real pain the ass
I saw the driver of the truck who was going to kill me and he looked like he was drunk. Because I was at peace I didn't feel any anger towards him and only hoped that my death would teach him a lesson to never drink and drive again
Now I looked at the girl whose name I didn't know. She was on the other side of the road but hasn't fallen yet. She was in a backward falling position with her hands reached out towards me. She was looking straight at me
Her despair filled eyes were now gone and were back to the usual bright beautiful eyes that I admired. I was happy her eyes had regained the will to live but now she was looking at me with tear filled eyes and a heart broken expression
I didn't think she would actually feel sad for a stranger like me. Although I was the cause of all this and a person she hates she was still willing to give that expression. I don't know if it's right to say this but it feels nice knowing that some people will feel sad about my death. It makes me feel loved when I know people will miss me when I die
Kaede and dad would definitely be heartbroken, that's for sure. Both of 'them' back in my old town would also feel sad if I pass away. Even Hina-san would cry for me even though we haven't spent a lot of time together due to her kind heartedness. But the question was if Kisaragi-san would shed a tear for me. It's a question I will never get the answer to
In these last moments of mine I decided to say my final words to everyone I know
I'll start with Kaede who matters the most to me
"Kaede, I don't think I can take care of you anymore so I'm going to tell the stuff I want you to follow. After I'm gone you better eat your food properly instead of snacking on those junk items. Just because I'm gone doesn't mean you can watch TV all day without doing your homework. You better be careful around boys because their all wolves in sheep's skin and I won't be there to protect-…."
Is this truly what I want to say?
"'Scratch that. That's not what I want to say'"
"I know you'll do all that even if I'm not there because you're a strong and responsible girl. What I truly want to say is…."
"I'm sorry for being such a hopeless brother leaving you, when you need me the most. I'm sorry that I can't cook your favourite dishes anymore even when you're hungry. I'm sorry I can't protect you anymore like I promised mom. I'm sorry I can't welcome you back when you come back home knowing you'll feel lonely. I'm sorry I won't be the first to see you in your high school uniform. I'm sorry I won't be at your graduation cheering you on and embarrassing you in front of your friends. I'm sorry I won't be able to eat with you when you treat me with the money you earned from your first job. I'm sorry I can't support you and become your Cupid when you fall in love with someone. I'm sorry that I won't be able to cry at your wedding or be the best uncle your children will ever have. I'm sorry that we won't be able to reminisce about our past when we get old and say those were the good days. But Kaede most of all I'm sorry for leaving you alone when I promised I would always be by your side. I will always love you and will always be in your heart, so don't get lonely without your Onii-chan"
Phew....I teared up a bit but onto the next one
"Dad, after I'm gone you better come back home and take care of Kaede properly. No more trips around the world because Kaede needs you by her side. You know how much she hates to be alone. I know we both always fought and had arguments but actually I always had fun when I fought with you. You taught me many things and one of them is to always help a girl in need. So you're basically the reason I'm giving up my life for this girl which I know you'll be proud of. If someone gave me the choice of having either you as a father or someone who is the best father in the world who loved his son more than anything I would still choose you. If you don't take care of Kaede properly, me and mom will come and haunt you in your dreams. So do a good job in taking care of her or else you'll be having nightmares for the rest of your life"
Next those two back there
"I know you'll get lonely without me but just don't go picking on another boy just because I'm not there you old buffoon. I don't fully trust dad so you better visit Kaede frequently to see if she's okay. Who knows, with your current age we might be meeting in heaven sooner than you think"
"Now to you, my very first friend. Thank you for accepting me back then and changing my life. I know you'll feel sad when you hear about me when you wake up but don't let that discourage you and follow your dreams. Sorry I can't keep the promise of being the first person to read your future hit manga"
Next up is Kondo Sensei
"Kondo Sensei, thank you for being the first teacher to accept me and treat me like a normal student. You truly were my hero when I was young. It's sad to think that I will be passing on without being able to attend a single class of yours. I'm sure they would've been fun"
Of course I can't forget Hina-san
"Hina-san, thank you for being my friend even though it was pretty short. I wanted to spend more time with you and see all your cute reactions but I guess that's not possible. Please stay the way you are and never change because there are a lot of people in the world like me that you need to help by just being yourself. Try to stand up for yourself a little more and always have that adorable smile on your face that enchanted me the first time I saw it"
Finally Kisaragi-san
"I barely know anything about you except that you love to tease me but I feel like we've known each other for years. Your definitely the most interesting women I've ever met and probably the most similar to me. I loved the conversations we had and would love to continue them throughout the years. Thank you for talking to me when I was down in the dumps and thank you for letting me into the JEC even though it's your private room. Although it's a bit too early I'll be handing in my resignation letter and leaving the club. You know as a final word I'll say one more thing. That club room of yours would look so much better if it had more people in it, so try to accept others in your life. I guess I'll be passing on without finding out my relationship with you, that's a shame"
"I guess that wraps up my final words to the people I knew. But that was pretty short. I hope in my next life I can meet a lot of more people. So when my time comes again I'll be saying final words to a bunch of people I know and love"
"Oh! I almost forgot about you, 'no name' girl. I sacrificed my life to save you, so you better stop frowning like you do in class and enjoy life to the fullest, even my share. Judging from the way you're looking at me you'll probably think that this is your fault and feel bad about it. But don't feel that way since it was my decision to save you and not your fault"
Well it's not like you can hear me now, so I can't convey that
What should I do?
Oh I know! I'll just smile as big as I can. She'll know that I died a satisfying death when she sees my smiling face. Then she won't feel that bad about it. Well that's only my wishful thinking
I smiled as much as I could while still floating in mid air. I hope she notices it
I guess that's everything I want to say and do. Now it's time to go to heaven or at least anywhere but hell
*Sigh*
I know nothing's going to happen even if I say this but I'm still going to say it anyway
"Although I didn't have the best life it was just getting better. It would be cool if I had a second chance to change this once sad life of mine to a happy one and see it through the end. But it's not like I can do anything about it no-"
"THEN JUST SAY THAT FROM START YOU STUPID SON OF MINE!" Shouted a voice that I never would have expected in a million years
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MOM!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!