The Revenge of the Birds

Seeing Hermione and Penelope Clearwater petrified in the infirmary gave Barnaby a pang of guilt, knowing that if he hadn't been careless with the diary, he could have prevented their current state.

At least they were only petrified.

As he left the infirmary, he still recalled the visit he received this morning, none other than Cornelius Fudge himself!

The current Minister of Magic, Tonks' superior, and… a complete waste of air in his opinion.

He came with every intention of providing a "response" to the concerned parents who were exerting pressure with their opinions, and that response involved directly arresting his father without even a proof or formal accusation.

Barnaby had to restrain himself from slamming the door in his face.

So, when he learned that the Keeper of Keys at Hogwarts had been on vacation for a while and was very, very far away when another petrification case occurred, Cornelius's face turned the color of his liver.

He came here with nothing to substantiate his arrest, sending someone to fetch Hagrid from Egypt would only make him a laughingstock if he insisted on his "brilliant plan."

Oh, Barnaby saw the look he gave him, as if weighing the possibility of pinning the problem on him as the suspect's son, but unfortunately for Fudge, having a girlfriend as an apprentice Auror made Barnaby very familiar with the laws to defend himself and he didn't fall into any trap.

Although Barnaby was a bit puzzled when Fudge visibly trembled when he took a bite of one of his freshly made rock cakes, fueled by his anger, his exclusive extra crunchy edition.

Hmm, in fact, they were still too soft…

In the end, the man left without saying a word and later, Barnaby learned about Dumbledore's dismissal, which filled him with joy… until he heard about the new petrification case.

That was surely the reason why Fudge had to move in person.

Things didn't improve when that same day, he learned from Aunt Pomona during a teachers' meeting that a student had been kidnapped and sent to the Chamber of Secrets, where "her skeleton will lie forever."

Poor Ginny Weasley.

Barnaby decided to return to the second-floor bathroom to see if he could find any more clues, perhaps something that could help locate the youngest Weasley, but Myrtle was not there and the trail seemed to have gone cold.

Even Sanshi couldn't notice anything, saying that this place stank much more since the last time.

Frustrated, Barnaby could only leave.

"Harry?" What he didn't expect was to find Harry and Ron pointing their wands at Lockhart. "What are you doing?"

"We know where the Chamber of Secrets is!" Harry explained hurriedly. "And the culprit is a basilisk!"

"And this guy was going to flee the castle, he's a fraud!" Ron said while repeating what Lockhart had told them about using a Memory Charm and stealing credit from others.

Barnaby nodded, having known for a while that something was wrong with this man.

Though internally, he wondered why Ron was using the old broken wand instead of the new one Barnaby had sent him for Christmas.

Did he mix up the wand cases again?

The new wand was in the right-hand case!

If Gilderoy knew what that stick was capable of, he might turn and punch Ron to escape, so Barnaby had to act as if that wand was remotely functional without giving anything away.

"So, where's the entrance?" Barnaby looked around, puzzled. "There's only one door in and out here."

"There!" Harry pointed as he approached the sinks and after finding the one with snakes carved on it, he spoke in Parseltongue to open the way.

"Okay, I wasn't expecting that," Barnaby looked at the depth and could only conclude it was pretty far down.

After a rather abrupt descent, when everyone was looking around, Gilderoy snatched Ron's wand, boasting about writing a new book from his perspective after erasing their memories.

"Barnaby, although I don't know where those creatures of yours came from or why you wouldn't let me study them, I'll make sure they're immortalized forever," he guaranteed with a smile. "I know a great taxidermist. Now, Obliviate!"

Bang!

The three watched as Gilderoy swallowed his own spell and ended up unconscious on the ground. Barnaby judged that with the power he used and the brightness of the light, he had probably just erased his entire life in one fell swoop.

He approached the broken wand and crushed it underfoot.

"My wand!" exclaimed Ron.

"Please, start using the one I made for you already!" Barnaby said exasperatedly while rubbing his foot on the ground to completely destroy the defective wand. "There, now you won't confuse them again."

And there won't be any more accidents like now; it could well have been Ron who ended up a victim of his own spell.

Wait, that already happened…

Well, those slugs were used to make potions.

Ron could only resign himself, it wasn't that he had confused wands or didn't like the new one, he was simply too used to using that one. Well, now he didn't have that luxury.

"Let's not waste time," said Harry, worried. "Ron, keep an eye on Lockhart in case he wakes up before we return. Barnaby, hurry up!"

"Give me a moment, I made a promise and it's time to fulfill it." Barnaby extended his hand and submerged it in the air, apparently searching for something. "Ah, got it."

Withdrawing his hand, Harry could see what he had retrieved was…

"A chicken?" he asked, not understanding how a chicken would help them in this situation.

"No, this is not a chicken," Barnaby denied while casting a levitating charm on the bird and tossing it into the Chamber of Secrets. "It's a cucco, brought directly from Hyrule."

Neither Harry nor Ron knew where that place was, but they then heard a thud followed by an angry bird's squawk, and before they could understand what was happening, they heard the sound of a lot of flapping wings, splashing water, and a very tragic serpent's scream…

Barnaby took out his pocket watch and after counting enough time, put it away just as the serpent's screams stopped and the stone walls ceased shaking from its thrashing.

"Well, now we can enter."