The Beginning

I was a girl that no person or kids would play with nor pay attention with, even my own parents.

"Heriya! Come here, you did this right? How dare you make a mess in the wall? Wash it off!" my mother yelled at me.

"I said wash it off! Clean it!" she kept yelling.

"I don't like this it's noisy" I whispered.

I look around and saw my little sister "want me to help you?" she offered some old clothes; I just took it.

"You know big sissy, you should draw on a paper instead of drawing in the wall" my little spoke.

"if you're willing to give me a lot of papers why not." I responded. It took a lot of time trying to get the paint of the wall, but we still manage to clean it.

"Cearoline, come here sweety. Don't be to close with that girl, she might influence you with some bad actions or doings."

My mother looked at me with despised look on her eyes, I look at my little sister, she looks down and responded, "yes mother, I apologize".

I feel like I don't belong in this place again. I went to my room and rest, but I saw my papers shattered all over the floor.

"Just what am I doing with my life?"

I asked my self and tears kept falling from my eyes.

"I don't like this!"

I said a bit loudly. My knees fell to the ground as I cry for the whole day.

"Why can't they show a bit of their kindness towards me?"

I whispered and fell asleep right away.

Morning came, I woke up and was a lot of paper beside me almost ten times than the paper from last night. I took one of the papers and saw a writing.

"Big sissy, don't write on the wall again or else mama will get mad, mad!"

I giggled a bit after reading the letters. For some reason I feel appreciate. I took my paints and brushes and started painting; I feel alive again. The night came, someone knocked on my door,

"young lady, here is your dinner. You haven't eaten anything the whole day, the madam is worried" a young maid said.

"no thank you, I do not have any appetite. You can go now" I responded and continue to paint.

I continue to paint 'till the sun arrived and went straight to the kitchen to get some food.

"Oh my, young miss, what brought ya here today? Are you hungry?" the head cook asked.

"yep... I want some bread. At least..." I spoke.

"Okay, do you want some water or milk?" he asked me again.

"I want milk..." I responded.

"Looks like the young miss couldn't sleep last night" he giggled.

"Here ya go!"

"It's my specialty." He whispered and gave me the bread with egg with cheese, ham, and cabbage, with a glass of milk.

I tasted the bread, it was delicious. "Thank you..." I spoke.

"What's there to thank me for? It's my job ya know." he smiled and got back to work.

"I'll go back to my room now, thank you again..." I spoke.

while walking I bumped into my mother.

"I'm sorry..." I said while my head was lowered.

"hmm, you should look where you are going." She said and walked away, I look at her once more and I felt my heart crushing again.

[why can't she just speak to me in a softer tone?]

While walking towards my room, holding back my tears, i bumped into my little sister. She looked me straight into my eyes and said,

"sister? is there something wrong?"

I immediately said "Nothing's wrong."

but I guess it really has no effect on her, she really tell how or what i'm feeling.

"Sister, it's bad to lie!" my little spoke.

I was shocked by what she has said and how she kept nagging about how i don't speak my feelings to her. I laughed at her after she nagged at me, she glared at me and said,

"Sister, stop it!" but i ignored it and just laughed.

Days passed, I draw a big portrait of myself and a portrait of my little sister with mother.

I heard noises from downstair, I went and look what's the commotion. A thief came inside the mansion.

My tears fell as I saw what was happening, my little sister laying on the floor with almost 15 stabs on her body. I feel like my whole world crushed.

I looked at my mother, she was crying, everyone was panicking. It was noisy. I hate it, I ran inside my room again and locked myself there.

I hated myself for running away when my little sister was dying.

"I wish I was the one who died..."

I whispered. I fell asleep after crying. I woke up by a loud bang in my door. I open my door in hurry and saw my mother, she raised her hand and slapped me,

"WHERE WERE YOU?! YOUR LITTLE SISTER DIED AND YOU'RE JUST IN YOUR MESSY ROOM?!"

she shouted at me. I didn't speak, she kept slapping me and yelling at me. I can't argue with it, I'm a bad older sister, I let my own sister died.

The butler took my mother away from me. My nose and mouth were bleeding, I went inside my room and lock it again. I cry the whole night; in the morning I feel numb I couldn't feel any emotions.

I tried to paint again, but it felt like something is missing.

[Why didn't I helped them?! Why?! Why did you went back to the room?! Why did you leave when your little sister needed help?!] I kept asking myself.

I lay down to the floor again and tears were rolling through my face.

I close my eyes and dream of a place where no one was there a peaceful and calming place.

When I woke up, I was somewhere, it's not somewhere, it's the place that I've always dreamed of. I looked up in the sky and saw my body.

[did I die? Where am I?] I asked to myself.

I watched my body for the whole day and night. No one came to see if I was fine.

Days passed I saw my own self, my own body already rotting, it was hard to watch.

Someone finally came in and saw my body. The maids were shaking, some are calling someone to remove my body. But I never saw my mother.

[my heart, it hurts…] I whispered.

I watch them again, as my heart ache everything was like in slow motions.

I saw them holding and carrying my dead body. I finally saw my mother; she was emotionless as she looked at my body.

I burst into tears, I thought that she would at least be sad that I died, but she didn't show any emotions. It broke my heart.

I wish I didn't look for her. A few moments later I fell asleep.

When I woke up, I saw the stair, the maids and butlers. I realized I was inside my own painting.

[Did mother hang my paintings in the wall?]

I was so curious and happy, I burst into tears again.

I saw everything that's happening, listened to people's conversation.

I saw the changes that happens, I saw how the mansion got abandoned.

The more the less the people in here the more that I can get out freely from the painting.

One day I finally get out from the painting, I saw my mother's portrait and cry.

[how long has it been?] I asked myself.

I change everything in this mansion and made it look like an art museum, every day I paint in the middle of the inside of the mansion.

One day a young lord came saying that he is lost, he was mesmerized by my paintings and want to buy one.