Do You Love Me?

I shook my head.  "I'm not going to let either of you take the blame.  I was the one who hid him in the sealed classroom, and I am solely responsible for this because I was the only one who had access to that classroom." 

I buried my face in my hands. " I just could not turn him in.  He was so distraught and scared.  I did what I thought was right.  It may not be what's right for society, but it's right for him, and I will take full responsibility for this."

"Woman, that ship sailed away a long time ago." Corwin put his glass down and placed his fingers under my chin, lifting my face up. 

"We are responsible for you.  When you decided to help Tarzan, All the ramifications of that decision ran through my head."

Corwin's blue eyes were steadfast and strong.  "But I stood by you because it felt right.  That was a conscious decision that I made, so you cannot be solely responsible for that decision."

Connor tapped my forehead with a gentle finger.  "Even though we haven't mentioned this to you, Corey and I have talked about this at length and how we will be able to deal with the legal aspects of aiding and abetting a fugitive asset."

His blue eyes were warm and soft.  "We are in this together and we will go with you all the way to the end."

Tears filled my eyes and I struggled hard not to cry. 

The twins were going out on a very dangerous limb to help me and Tarzan, and I had no clue how I was ever going to be able to repay them. 

"Who's making my Nana cry?" Simon's voice crackled from behind.  I turned to him and smiled, even though tears were falling down my face. 

He too, had thrown his lot in with us and faced the very same charges. 

I hoped that if the need ever arose, I could convince the council to abolish, or at the very least, drastically lighten his criminal load due to the fact that he was still underage and technically, a child. 

"Hi Simon."  I greeted.  "It's just me being silly."  I sniffed and wiped the tears from my cheeks with trembling fingers.  Once again, I was the weakest one of the group.

"You guys are just amazing people, and I love you all so much.  So very much."  I pressed a hand to my heart, feeling every word ring true.

"We—ahem"  Simon cleared his throat. "We love you too."

"Yes, we do," Connor agreed in a solemn voice and nudged Corwin.  "Don't we?"

Corwin puckered his face without saying anything, but I could tell he was only pretend-scowling and so I laughed at him, and then looked around. 

"Where's Tarzan?"

"Right here," Simon pointed to a stranger standing next to him. 

The man had a large swarthy face and thick bushy hair the color of bright carrots, his dark brown eyes gleaming with wicked amusement.  Suddenly, he grinned, showing me all his various familiar crooked teeth.

I stared at him for a few moments. 

"No..." I breathed.  "Oh no!"  I started giggling. 

It was just too funny! 

Left to his own device, Tarzan had picked up on a physical likeness of a random guy on the street and used it to transform his own appearance. 

With the exception of keeping his orange-red hair, there was no sign that Tarzan was the orangutan that I had known for years. 

We all started laughing, almost uncontrollably.  Simon doubled in half, spitting beer on the floor while Tarzan cackled and slapped his thighs with mirth.  The brothers guffawed and pounded each other on the backs. 

Holding their beer glasses up in the air, they made a toast to Tarzan and then slam-dunked the amber liquid in one swallow. 

As the noise from our group grew larger, more bystanders joined us.

"Eh, whereabouts are you kids from?"  A man with light brown curly mustache and amber eyes, in white painter's overalls and a smoking cap called out from our right.  He held up a mug of beer in appreciation of our joviality.

"Further south."  Connor responded and raised his mug. 

"South, eh?  To the south!"  The man toasted, to which the twins drank with glee. 

This led to a loud and boisterous series of beer chugging tribute to the four corners of the (roundish) Earth among his similarly-clad friends.   

"Eh, did you guys see that large group of apes that came through here the other day?"  A guy from behind us called out to the man in the smoking cap and laughing in a raucous manner. 

I turned towards the voice.  He was a local, by the looks of his stonewashed jeans and blood-orange jersey with the white number 88 prominently displayed. 

"Yep!"  Smoking cap guy replied.  "They bought out our entire fruit an' vegetable bins.  I had nothing left to sell except for a few bundles of dried seaweed brought in from the coast.  Had plenty of meat left though." 

He drained his mug and asked no one in particular.  "Where did they come from?"

"They came in on the Constellation Rail."  A portly guy in brown overalls sitting at the window booth answered. 

"As far as I know, Constellation Rail only comes through the tunnel once or twice a week, and mostly just to deliver seafood from Summersands.  I had no idea there were so many apes in Summersands!"

My ears picked up the name 'Summersands'.  Was this the name that they gave to Topaz in Azure? 

"Maybe they came to Summersands on a ship and were just passing through."  Orange Football Jersey guy spoke up.

"Maybe, but they were herded by some government folks."  Brown Overalls guy interjected.

"Oh, you mean those scary guys in black suits?"  Orange Football Jersey guy asked.

My eyes narrowed.  It WAS Topaz and the Mage Elites they were talking about.

"They ain't government anything.  They never showed no badges or nothin'."  Smoking Cap man said, shaking his head. 

"They look like a buncha businessmen, making some deals.  Them apes are probably their payload, although I have no idea who'd want to buy them, and for what." 

"Meat?"  Orange Football Jersey called out.

From behind me, I heard Tarzan growl, a low, menacing sound.  Corwin whispered a calming Command at Tarzan while Connor spoke up.

"Who'd wanna eat apes?!  I'd rather have steaks!"  Connor raised his mug.  "To steaks!  Medium rare!"

"Steaks!"  All the men roared and drank their beer. 

By the time dinner was ready to be served, everyone in the house was completely drunk off the sudsy dark draft. 

Everyone, that is, except for us mages and Tarzan. 

We were in dangerous unknown territory and could not afford to be mentally incompetent, even if it was just for a night.

We ended up magiking the alcohol out of our bloodstream even as we drank alongside everyone there.  The result was a less than comfortable full belly with no satisfying head buzz. 

We ate what we could, and then retired early, pleading pounding heads and lily livers unused to the local brewery.

Once in the relative safety of my room, I re-checked my bags to make sure I had everything that I would need for the journey across The Wastes, and then I crawled into bed. 

As soon as I closed my eyes, there came a pounding on my door. 

I pried my bleary lids apart and winced as the sunlight hit my face.  How could it be that between the few seconds which separated closing my eyes and the pounding on the door, an entire eight hours had passed?

"Time to get up sweetheart," Connor's voice called through the doorway.

"I'm up, I'm up," I called out in a groggy voice. 

I struggled to untangle myself from the covers and managed to stagger to the bathroom for a morning shower.  Once I was cleaned and dressed, I went knocking on the guys' door. 

Simon opened up, hair dripping from what looked like a very recent shampooing. 

"Nana!  Glad you're up.  We're almost done."  He waved his hand and pulled the door open wide. "Come on in."

I looked in through the open doorway and saw one twin without a shirt and the other wearing nothing but a towel.  I felt my face heating up as Simon laughed and called me a prude.

The twin wearing the towel snarled at Simon, then poked his still-damp head out between the door and the jamb.  "Sorry Nana.  We're not quite ready yet.  Give me a couple of minutes to throw on some clothes and I'll help you get your gear out of the room." 

I nodded, then fled the scene.

True to his word, within five minutes, he was at my door, looking much less exposed and dressed in rugged cargo pants and a white tee-shirt. 

"Hi Corwin.  I wasn't expecting you so quickly."

"Why not?  I told you I'd be here in a few minutes."

I shrugged.  "All you had on was—never mind.  Where is Connor?"

"Downstairs, meeting with the driver that you made arrangements with yesterday.  He said he was going to manage the process because I tend to scare people away with my intense personality, so I'm here to help you." he trailed off, looking away with that ubiquitous scowl.

"Well, thank you."  I looked away, not sure what else to say.  He seemed to be in an awful mood and I couldn't put my finger on the reason why.

"Did you…" Corwin trailed off. 

"Hmm?"

"Did you mean what you said yesterday?"

I turned to look at him.  My mind ran through all the things I said yesterday and I couldn't figure out exactly what he was alluding to. 

"I always mean what I say, but I said a lot of things yesterday.  Remind me again what it was that I said."

"You said you loved us.  Did you mean that?  Do you?  Love us, I mean."  He glared at me with an intensity that was almost frightening.

I looked away.  "Of course I do!  You guys have saved my life several times and we've literally been through hell together.  I am extremely grateful to be here with all of you."

"So it's not love that you feel, it's gratitude."  The corner of his lips turned downward.

"No, it's not just gratitude."  I turned back to face him. 

"We've been through so much together that when I think of you and Connor and Simon, heck, even Tarzan and Max, I get this feeling that we're more like a very close family."  I smiled with what I hoped would convey to him warmth and caring.

He turned away with disappointment.  "So you think we're like your brothers?"

I shook my head, thinking of the five much older brothers I had who I rarely ever talked to and barely even remembered. 

"No.  We're even closer than that.  More like partners and best friends."  I frowned.  "Why are you asking me about this now?"

"Because yesterday, Connor asked me a question and I never answered.  Do you remember the question?"

I shook my head, not sure where this was leading up to.

Corwin closed his eyes.  "When Simon said we all loved you, Connor confirmed that he did and then he asked me if I did too.  I never answered him." 

"You don't have to, Corwin.  It's ok--"

"Wait…" He held up a hand.  "I wanted to be perfectly clear with you--" 

"I understand you."  I interrupted, glancing at his troubled expression.  "Really.  I do understand."

"You do?"  He seemed relieved.

"Of course.  I know you don't hate me, but you don't want me to misunderstand your intentions as anything more than friendly."

"Ummmm."  He muttered, looking somewhat crestfallen.  "Nana--"

I grabbed his arm.  "Well then, since you've cleared it up with me, let's go.  They are all waiting for us." 

Corwin nodded, looking as if he wanted to say something more to me. 

"Come on." I yanked him along.  "We can talk about this later when we get another chance."