Chapter 74: Self Love

Author's Note:

I little info and trivia for you guys about me. So today is my Birthday I was born in the year 1993 so you all can guess what my age is. I was born on the month of April so I always refer myself as a hot baby cause here in Philippines the months of March-May to early week of June is the summer season and usually the temperature rises up from average of 39-42 degrees celsius. Yeah you can roughly get the idea on how hot it is here. So I was literally born in the hot season of the year here. I'm 4'9" tall and I look like 16 year old girl than my real age. Often times I always mistaken as a teenager and I'm flat chested. I used to hate how my body built is because I'm short and I used to wish I was taller and have more curve like of an adult woman, though I love my baby face maybe that's the only thing I'm quite thankful for back then but the rest I quite hate it, which made me envy a lot of people before but as I grew older I learned how to love myself more, I learned how to appreciate my body and how it was built. I learned how to make adjustments to have things around me compliment my body type. It was really hard at first specially finding sizes that can fit me. Finding styles and designs that will fit me. Even with shoes I have been having a hard time finding the right shoes that will fit me caus my feet size is 34.5 it was small really that I always ended up going to the kids section most of the time. But I learned a few tricks as time goes by. The moment I accepted myself is the time people around me start noticing me and appreciating me and that time I learned one of the greatest lessons in life and that is the way how you look and treat yourself is the way how the people around you will look and treat you. Be your own fan.

Anyways this is the reason why I entitled it as self love. I know many have told you about self love before but self love is not something that can be easily achieve. It is an internal conflict and many different level of war within yourself before you can truly win and accept yourself but remember no one will believe in you more than you believe in yourself. So put a little faith in you little by little.

This is my birthday present to you all, I hope you guys like it.

Happy Reading 😊!

**********************

Adrian walked out of the Police station still pulling Nash he then stopped when they reached the parking lot to look over to Terrence direction. "Terrence give me your car keys." Terrence throw him his keys. "Just take a cab back to my place if you still don't want to go home." Terrence just gave him an Ok sign. Adrian pushed Nash inside the passenger seat and he went to the driver's seat. "Where are we going?" Nash asked but Adrian remained silent.

"Are you angry?" Nash asked again.

"Yes I am, why didn't you talk back? Will you just let other people push you over? Will you just let them look down on you?" Adrian is clearly fuming mad at him.

"I have been treating you with care afraid that I might hurt you in any way. I'm even willing to go as far as fixing things with my family first before I introduce you to them cause I don't want you to hear hurtful words from them. Nash Babe, I don't want people to look down on you, you don't deserve it."

"How can you ever understand someone like me? You're beautiful, you have the perfect body. I don't even know why you would choose someone like me." Nash wipe the tears from his face that suddenly dropped from his eyes.

"I'm already contented with how I am, I already accepted that. Sometimes in life if you accepted the things you are lacking it wouldn't hurt as much than the time you tried to deny it." Adrian suddenly hit the breaks. "Adrian, you know that's dangerous!"

"That's it, yeah it's possible. I don't mind how you look right now but the time that you are wallowing to self pity needs to come to an end." Adrian mumble to himself.

"What are you talking about?" Nash asked.

"Babe I think I know what to do." Adrian hold Nash on both of his shoulders. "I will help you, I will make you beautiful not that you aren't. I mean Babe you are beautiful to me but we need to go to the hospital first. Yes right hospital." Adrian shifted back to the steering Wheel.

"Babe why the Hospital?" Nash is getting worried and weirded out.

"Babe we need to check your physical health first." Adrian didn't provided any explanation. When they got in the hospital Nash underwent physical examination with all sorts of tests they found out that Nash is already in the category of Obese class 1 aside from that he has Hypothyroidism which largely contributes to his body not loosing much fat. Adrian keeps on massaging his temples he learned how unhealthy Nash body is and he's not even aware of that.

"Babe are you even having a proper check ups,?" The doctor is giving them both a weird and awkward look each time he calls him Babe and that's only making Nash even more uncomfortable unlike in the place where they've stayed for months never once Nash felt that his relationship with Adrian is weird and not normal in anyway.

"I did for the requirements when I got a job." Nash can see the dismay in Adrian's expression.

"Babe they are only doing basic examinations there. See Babe everything about you is high, your cholesterol level, your blood pressure you're literally hypertensive and yet you didn't even do anything to address this? Even your sugar level is also high, I'm quite surprise that you're not even diabetic yet." Nash wanted for the floor to open and swallowed him whole. He was told that he's already hypertensive but he just let's it be cause he doesn't feel anything and eating sweets is one of his guilty pleasure specially when he's stress out and sad.

Adrian noticed the depressing look that Nash have so he tilted his chin to make him look at him. "Babe I don't want to be a widower I still haven't even married you and yet." Adrian took Nash hand and place it at the top of his chest where his heart is. "You're making me scared. I have never been this scared in my whole life until I saw all your tests results. Babe as much as I love you just the way you are but if I wanted to spend my life with you till we're both grey and old then I must change your life style." Adrian turned his gazed to the Doctor.

"Doctor please tell us what are the do's and don't for his condition, all medicines that he needs to take to address all his health issues. Please refer us to a nutritionist. We will be needing to know what food must he take what else. Please also do refer as to license physiology I want to know what form of exercise and workouts that he can do as a start." Adrian said it all like he's ordering food from a restaurant.

"B-Babe... isn't this a bit too much?" Nash finally said something.

"No Babe this is just right. I won't be a widower without even getting married. You need to exercise Babe and I personally will supervise it." Adrian gave him a meaningful smile that only made Nash gulp in nervousness.

"B-but Babe you just came back... t-there's a lot of things you need to work on and I on the other hand still needs to go to my work." Adrian knows that Nash has a point.

"Work? I thought we both agreed that you will work again for me?"

"I really love to but I don't want to create more trouble. It will be better if I'll just work somewhere else while you fix what you need to fix with your family. Don't worry about the job I landed in, thanks to my previous job background I was able to land a good job. I'll be just fine so don't worry too much."

"I'm not confident with other Alphas surrounding you."

"Babe what do you need to get work up for? I'm marked, you marked me remember?" Nurse who's showing report to the doctor and over heard the conversation dropped what she's holding upon hearing that Nash is marked by him.

Adrian didn't mind what happened and quickly changed the topic by letting Nash with his job."Ok, but for your workout I will have to schedule it. For times I won't be able to workout with you I'll send someone to monitor you but for your food and medicines I will personally going to supervise it." After everything has been settled the two went back to Terrence car and drove till both of them stopped at a high end luxury hotel. Adrian made sure to take only the best and most expensive room in that hotel the whole penthouse.

"Babe why do you have to take this room?" Nash is in total awe of what he's seeing right now. The room doesn't look like a room at all, it is as big as the whole ground floor area of the hotel. It has two rooms, inside jacuzzi and even it's own swimming pool at the veranda overlooking. Everything about the room can be access through a voice command and the room comes with a personal butler that will serve them anytime of the day. A room that has its own theater and many more. It was a first for Nash. He probably wouldn't get a chance experiencing to be in that kind of room if it weren't for Adrian. He felt Adrian's hand circle to his waist and his chin placed on his shoulder.

"Do you like it?" Adrian asked.

"Yes, it's so pretty just like you." Nash said. "I bet you brought a lot of pretty girl and Omegas here." Nash said.

"Nope I don't make that much effort in spending fortune for women and men that I'll just be fucking for one night. I only make an effort and spend that much to you." Nash can already feel the wet kisses that Adrian is giving his neck and shoulders.

"I really do love you Babe."

"Hhhhmmmmmm....." Nash only moan in response.

************************

"Sebastian where's Lander? How come I hadn't seen him greet me?" That's what Lance said the first thing he got home. Lander his son always comes running whenever his Daddy comes home which is what Lance always look forward too. He sometimes remembers Liam through him cause Liam is the same, he would wait and greet him whenever he comes home. Lance knew that it might take a longer time before he can experience it again with his wife specially now that Aiden has no plan to get married. His short comings cause the love of his life to lose faith in marriage. He thought that probably that's his karma but as long as Aiden remain by his side then that would be enough for him now.

"Young master Lander is in his room with Aiden." Sebastian answered his question.

"Aiden is here?" Lance asked.

"Yes he went to visit young master Lander and play with him." Lance almost run Lander's room and when he got there he saw that the door was open so he took a peek and there they are playing trains. Aiden is even wearing the conductor's hat and Lander wears the train driver uniform. They look so adorable playing seriously, Lance will give everything just to have a view like this every single day. If he could only change Aiden's mind he would marry him as soon as possible.

"Mind if I joined you both?" Lance said upon entering, Lance played the passenger. All three of them played till Lander got tired and finally fell asleep. After Lance had put Lander to his room he saw Aiden waiting for him.

"Hey want to take a walk with me outside?" Aiden asked that Lance gladly accepted. Both of them take a walk without anything to talk about the two enjoyed the night cool breeze and the little light post which accentuates the beautiful garden that Lance mansion have. "This place still haven't changed. It was still the same as before, I remember the time when you serenade me in this very place to ask for an apology. I felt like I was in a fairy tale movie and you are my prince. I didn't forgave you right away cause I was so afraid of getting hurt for the second time but your accident made me realize that I should have never hesitated. That's why when I was given a chance I forgave you and made the decision to start over with you but in the end I was hurt more than I was hurt the first time. Not just my heart was broken, my mind and my body were both shuttered to pieces. In my mind I was calling you and secretly hoping that you can come and save me but you didn't Lance." Aiden stopped walking to look Lance in the eye.

Lance who can't say anything to defend himself felt ashamed and just look down. "I'm sorry, I know I have no excuse for being as shitty husband."

"Yes indeed you are a shitty husband. If I were to ask Lee would have probably much better than you are when it comes to that kind of department. If Dexter had gone missing and then suddenly a dead body was found I'm pretty sure that man will do everything to prove that it's not Dexter at all. Do you know why?" Aiden asked but Lance remained silent.

"It's simple Lee is the kind of man who can't give up Dexter. That's just how much he loves him. He will go through all lengths just to have him. After witnessing that at some point I felt envious, envious that Dexter have someone who won't give up on him."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Tears start falling from Lance eyes he felt like he has been punched hard with every words that are leaving Aiden's mouth.

"When I decided to try again with you I thought preserving our relationship as it is, is already enough but...."

Lance suddenly went to his knees and hugged Aiden's legs. "Aiden don't break up with me, I will do everything! Anything you want just don't leave me again. Don't break up with me, if you really don't want to get married then I won't force you. I will be contented in just being your boyfriend. I can't, I can't lose you again."

Aiden sit to level himself to Lance, he smiled and lifted Lance face so the two of them can see eye to eye. "Lance listen to me."

Lance covered both of his ears. "No! I don't want to listen!" Lance shouted.

"Come on listen to me. Lance you can't protect me, that's the conclusion I have reached and accepted. You can't do that but right now I don't need your protection anymore cause I already can protect myself. I don't need your power nor your wealth cause I already have power and wealth."

"You're really going to break up with me." Lance laughed like a mad man but Aiden kissed him.

"I'm not breaking up with you. You proposed to me twice but this time I will be the one proposing to you." Aiden brought out a velvet black box from his pocket and there inside a platinum ring. It has no design nor stone. It was just a plain band of ring — a blank canvas. I choose this one cause I want us to have a clean start. This time I will be the one to protect our family. Would it be ok with you to relay on me?" Lance nodded vigorously.

"Yes! Yes! I'll marry you!" Lance said as he pulled Aiden to a tight hug. "I don't mind to have our role reversed if that means I can have you but please let me also do my best this time to protect our family too. I won't mess up again, I promise."

Lance response put a smile on Aiden's lips. "Ok, it's better to have two of us working in protecting this family. Just make sure not to get yourself involve with another women or men Lance."

The coldness in Aiden's voice send shiver down his spine and the thought of how Aiden gunned those robbers suddenly flashed to his mind and he knew right there and there that it surely will be a different story if ever another woman will going to get involve with him this time.

"Of course not love, there will never be anyone other than you."

********************

"How long do you plan on staying here?" Axel asked.

"Hey sweety are you throwing your husband out on our second night as a married couple?" Jules asked.

"Not that I'm shooing you away, is just that we need to start doing our job, also I'm missing the kids."

"Just let me stay here till today and after that I'll be home. In two days time after tomorrow I'll be leaving for a mission." Jules said.

"What mission?" Axel asked.

"It's classified sweety, we just need to escort a very important person so don't worry."

"Is it dangerous?" Jules can see the fear and worry on Axel's eyes.

"It won't be dangerous. It's not that hard guarding and escorting someone is it?"

"Hhhmmm." Axel nodded slightly in agreeing with his husband. "Jules I'm planning in covering your mark with a tattoo. Will it be ok with you?"

"But why?" Jules asked.

"I'm an Omega, I can't show any weakness. Specially now that we need to use any weapon that we have. I also don't want them to hunt down my Alpha if ever they'll see it." Axel explained.

"You're not going to sleep around with anyone to do your job right?" Just thinking about it Jules probably would have killed the person who will take a taste of his wife.

"Of course I won't! What do you take me for? Anyways I won't sleep with them but I might seduce them. Sweety seduction is a great weapon into leading men to their doom."

"Ok, but after everything has been solved you will never going to seduce men ever again." Jules said, he knew well enough that they need to use every possible means to reach their goal. He might be able to take that seduction method but he wouldn't be able to take if Axel will sleep with anyone else other than him.

"I won't, besides I'm marked by you thus my body will just reject those fuckers."

"You really don't have any filters do you? You simply speak those vulgar words. For an Omega that's a major turn off." Jules commented.

"Nya! I'm no ordinary Omega besides not only Alphas have the right to say bad words." Jules laugh at the angry sight of his wife.

"Sweety swearing doesn't suit your beautiful face. But do you really have to go that far?" There's a hint of jealousy in Jules words and Axel can see the sadness and anger linger in his eyes.

"Jules I'll only do that as a last resort, men are weak to temptations. That's what we were taught. How do you think we managed to frame Troy?" Then a flashback suddenly came to Jules mind.

"You! You mean to say, that woman who framed that Troy Sy?"

"Yeah that's me, I disguised myself as Bea and he immidiately bought it."

"Did you slept with him?" Jules expression suddenly darkened, he knows it was in the past and that it happened when he's still out in his life but he can't help it being possessive towards his wife. He doesn't want Axel to sleep with another man. If it can be done he would hunt down all the men he had slept with.

"Nope, Aiden won't allowed me to use my body just to accomplish the plan. Seducing is the only exemption cause there's no better and easier way to get what you want than to lure your prey in your own trap. Even animals uses their pheromones to kill their prey Sweety."

"I think I just got myself married to such temptress, I got hard just by listening to you." Axel begun to slowly back away.

"Hey remember what the Doctor said, you just tore me down there we still need to wait for it to heal." Axel said defensively. He thought that if it were his old job and he needed to sleep with his target and if Jules probably his target then he's hundred percent sure that it will be a mission failed. What kind of assassin who wouldn't be able to throw a kick much less walk properly after they have been pounded by Jules big guy.

Jules just hug him by his waist. "Of course I know, I won't do anything that might hurt you." The two stayed there for a while cuddling with each other laughing. It was like a perfect moment for a normal couple but the two of them knows that they are far from normal.

"Can I choose your tattoo?" Jules asked. "You will be covering my mark with ink, so can I at least choose the design?" Jules asked.

"Of course you can." After giving his permission Jules went out of their room and get back with a pen and a piece of paper with him. He then made some sketches and when he's done he showed it to Axel.

"It's beautiful, simple yet beautiful." Axel was speechless after seeing the image.

"You like it?" Jules asked.

"Like it? Damn I love it!"

"You're like this, I always imagine if ever I will characterize you it will be a Pheonix. A beautiful, strong, fierce bird that rises up from the ashes." Axel wonder his eyes to every details of the drawing, the Pheonix is flying upwards, spreading it's wings in fullness. He run his fingers to every stroke of the sketch. "Don't let your past hold you down, spread your wings and fly up Axel. I want you to be free as that mythical bird."

Axel hugged Jules. Axel never saw himself as someone beautiful, he is far from that kind of person. He always view himself as someone dirty, a tool that is only meant to be used in handling dirty business but after meeting Aiden and Jules they made him respect his self and body more but not enough to view himself as someone beautiful after all he's just a dirty tool to do a dirty job no more no less. He was already lucky enough that Jules loved him even though he's dirty.

"Thank you..... so much, hick....hick..."

"Are you crying?" Jules can feel Axel's body slightly shaking and the wetness that starting to form in his right side of the shoulder.

"Thank you, for coming to my life." Axel said he has been hiccuping and sobbing.

"No I should be the one who should be thankful. My parents has been asking me to settle down for quite sometime now and they are also asking me to quit doing that jobs from the organization. If it weren't for you I'll probably still that lost man, jumping from one bed to another so thank you." Jules stroke Axel's back hair as he continuesly hugged him. " Continue to burn with passion my love just like that mythical bird I want you to fly freely and burn brightly." Jules felt Axel nodding unable to say any words as every words from his mouth are lost with his tears and sobbing.

********************

Adrian pounce on Nash as he take him from the back, bending Nash's head flat on the bed with only his backside lift in the air completely exposed to his lover's hungry sight.

"Aaahhhhh harder Babe, aaahhhhh deeper." The sound of his lover's begging is riling Adrian even more that he thrust in harder until he felt that Nash's body start shaking and his walls tight up then soon after he felt his own release. He pulled out from Nash and all his seed ooze out. Nash lied on his back flat after he felt that his lover finally pulled out after cumming to him a few times and the thought suddenly made Nash sit right up.

"We didn't use any protection." He whispered enough for Adrian to hear but Adrian didn't even response at all instead the man got up naked and went somewhere, so Nash have to shout. "Babe we didn't use any protection!"

Adrian came back with two glasses of water in his both hands, he handed the other one to Nash and he drink the other one by himself. "Didn't you hear me?"

"I heard you clearly Babe, it doesn't matter if I use protection or not. If you got pregnant I will take responsibility of it. It's not like I'm still a careless teenager who would jerk and spill his seed inside every person who he wants to fuck. I'm not getting any younger, my friends almost all of them already have their own babies, I also wanted to have my own too. Why don't you want too? If you're not yet ready then I can wait."

Nash shakes his head no, before he went away he was secretly hoping that he's pregnant with his baby at least he'll have some part of the man he ever loved so when that one mistake didn't bare him any child he was sad but he also accepted that maybe that's not for him. So when he heard him he's overwhelmed with happiness to think that the man he loves wants to have a baby with him.

"What about your parents?" Adrian pretend to think.

"There's nothing really they can do. I want you and what I want is what I always get. Just give me more time I'll definitely going to fix everything." Adrian kissed Nash on top of his temple while his other hand is tracing Nash's mark that Adrian left before.

"Why do you keep on touching that?"

"It's because it's the greatest reminder I have that tells me I'm not dreaming and that I have you tied up with me." Nash blushed after hearing it. "Come on it's time to take a bath now." Without waiting for Nash's words he carried Nash and took him inside the gigantic wash room with a gigantic bath tube that looks more like a pool than a bath tub inside.

"Put me down I can walk." Nash demanded.

"No can do Babe, today I will be spoiling you cause tomorrow and the next day I know it will be a torture to you but it will be for your own good so just relax and enjoy today." Adrian brought Nash in and have him seated on top of him. The two enjoy the soothing sensation brought by the warm water and fragrant scent that it has.

"Hey I can scrub myself and why are you hard? We just did it many times earlier." Nash complain.

"Can you blame me? I hadn't had any Nash for a couple of days of course I'll be this horny! Come on babe let me scrub and wash you." Adrian said placing small pecks of kisses to his nape and shoulder that made Nash moan when Adrian bit his skin a little. Adrian's pheromones is not helping as well. It's only making him more turn on. His body start burning up and his insides are quelching with thirst that only Adrian can fill. Adrian hands starts playing on that sensitive part which made Nash burn with desire. And just like that he felt that Adrian lifted him up a little only to find Adrian's manhood inside him once again.

"I really miss this, I can't get enough of you. Move on top of me Babe." Nash starts to move his hips riding Adrian while having his back face him. Nash is quite happy to do this in reverse as the Alpha wouldn't be able to see his lewd expression. Nash was about to reach his peak when Adrian stopped him and pulled out from him only to have him face him. So now Nash is sitting on Adrian's lap facing him.

"Now ride me Babe, I want to see that horny look on your face as you cum." Nash feels like his whole face is red now but being an obedient person that he is, he hold Adrian's manhood and place it on top of his entrance before putting his weight and let it sink deep within him only to have himself pulled back up and pushed back down. The rhythm start slow at first but as Nash get his momentum back the pacing starts increasing.

"Fuck you're doing great Babe, Unman your alpha. You're the boss today Babe." Adrian praises gave Nash the confidence to do it harder and faster he felt like he has been given the chance to take over the wheel, he felt like he's the one who's in control and with that in mind when he felt like Adrian's thing it twitching which indicates that he's almost near Nash stopped and made his pacing slow teasing his lover.

"Babe?" Adrian asked, feeling the wanting to cum but was deprived of the very momentum but instead of answering him Nash let out a sexy moan which only made Adrian frustrated so he carry Nash's body and have them switch places.

"Sorry Babe I think I should take over." Adrian's statement only made Nash laugh and that laughter was replaced by loud moans as Adrian encourage him to let out his moan. Adrian is happy that his lover is becoming more and more open and less shy around him. He wanted that, he wanted Nash earn confidence to himself even little by little soon people won't look down at him and he will make sure of that.