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The Boy in the Mirror- A Naruto Fanfiction

Naruto has never been truly okay mentally, he pushes his true feelings down deep within him, covering it with false confidence and stupid smiles. But what happens when a simple B rank mission is what drives Naruto to the pits of insanity, questioning if he really knows himself and his past as well as he thought he did. or In pursuit of a life of freedom, it appeared Naruto had become chained down with the lives he had stolen.

i_am_very_sleepy · Horror
Not enough ratings
7 Chs

Who am I?

"Who am I?" Naruto questioned, tilting his head slightly to the right. "How do I even answer that?"

The bored expressions on the genin's faces had been the product of sitting patiently in the waiting room of the hokage's tower for a supposed emergency meeting. Two long hours had already flown by, but in doing so Sakura saw the perfect opportunity to finally put to use the many activities she somehow managed to carry along with her. After lots of convincing she managed to rope Naruto, Sasuke, and a few others to take a written personality quiz to see who they were compatible with.

Naruto had already dozed off several times while taking the quiz, and Sasuke wasn't interested in the slightest, as he hadn't even finished the second question.

"Just put good attributes about yourself or something." Shikamaru shrugged, preoccupied with his own test. Naruto let a groan escape from his mouth; lowering his head, he allowed his eyes to trace the variety of cracks in the cement floor. The more time the blonde had to process his thoughts, the more self deprecating they became.

Did he even have any good attributes in the first place? He was a dead-weight and never failed to notice it. He covers up his self-doubt with stupid confidence and bold statements. It was his way of surviving. This harsh world doesn't conform to the wishes of others, especially him. He knew his team would be better off without him. They all excelled in something. Naruto could only dream of having the chakra control that Sakura has. And god he wasn't even close to Sasuke's raw talent, Naruto had trained for the same amount of time, put in the same amount of effort but still, he was just never good enough. The Uzumaki could feel his stomach twist further as his mind continued to compare him with his comrades.

"I'm done with mine." Ino cut in, holding up her paper. "I got a 34, which means I'm a bunny that's compatible with a snake." She giggled, aiming her gaze towards Sasuke. "What did you get, Sasuke?"

Sasuke looked up at the blonde girl. Annoyance written all over his face. He really couldn't care less for anyone in this room, they were all pawns in his big scheme of things. The more attachments he had, the more it would inconvenience him in the future.

"Don't know. Haven't finished yet." Sasuke stated coldly. Naruto chuckled softly as he rushed through the questions, suddenly glad the rest of the questions were multiple choice.

"I'm going to finish before you." Naruto exclaimed with a smug expression.

Naruto had always liked the idea of beating Sasuke. It was satisfying. Sasuke was always such a praised child, even now he was given automatic respect just for his last name, while Naruto had spent years attempting to scrape up any respect the village still had for him, trying desperately to prove he wasn't just a waste of space. Just for the result of his efforts to be cold shoulders and harsh glares.

It wasn't fair. Sasuke was recognized by the village. Naruto wasn't, and would never be.

Slowly overtime Naruto decided to stop feeding the growing hatred he had for Sasuke, as it wouldn't take him anywhere. He tried hard to view him in a more positive light. It proved to be a challenge with no doubt, but eventually he started seeing the many different, softer sides the boy had. However, Naruto was still resentful towards the Uchiha.

"Tch yeah right, I'm already on to the last question." Sasuke argued. Waving his paper in the air. Naruto shot up from his spot, earning himself strange glances.

"What!? There's no way! You were just on the second question, I saw you!" The Uzumaki screeched. Upset by this new found information.

"Quiet down, Naruto." Shikamaru said, leaning back in his chair. "You're drawing lots of attention." He finished. The blonde looked around, finally noticing the many chunin and jonin shooting him harsh glares. He flushed red, sitting back down, reflecting on his brash behavior.

"Okay! I'm done!" Sakura grinned. "I got a cat that's compatible with a tiger!" She was about to open her mouth to say more, when Sasuke cut her off.

"I got a leopard that's compatible with a leopard." Sasuke stated reluctantly. Naruto stared back down at his paper, adding up the numbers, the total being 22. He glanced further down the page looking for the animal next to his number.

"No way." He blurted. Staring wide-eyed at the bold leopard etched into his paper. "You copied me!" Naruto yelled. Fits of laughter filled the room.

"Hahaha! Naruto and Sasuke are meant to be!" Kiba said between laughs, slapping his hand on his thigh. Naruto stood, preparing to protest, when the doors to the Hokage's office were slammed open.

"Who doesn't love a good enemies to lovers?" Choji chuckled, failing to notice the open doors behind him. He opened his mouth to say more, getting cut off by a giant fist hurtling straight for his face. Sakura's menacing aura after throwing that terrifying blow was enough to shut everyone up.

An angry Shizune appeared in the doorway, obviously annoyed by the ruckus that had just taken place. "You may enter now." Shizune announced, with a strained smile. The group of young teenagers started migrating inside of the office, feeling the uneasy shift in energy. Even an idiot could tell that it was a serious matter. Once the old door had shut, Lady Tsunade began laying out papers and folders. Her hand was drawing circles on her forehead, revealing to everyone this was going to be an intense mission.

"There has been a series of murders in our area. Horrible ones. You have been carefully chosen to help out on this mission. We already have a list of suspects, But the list is far too long. Each team has been assigned targets and we need each of you to be on the lookout for anything suspicious. You will all be given a file with all the information you need. This is a B ranked mission, So I expect you all to take this very seriously." She concluded, leaning back in her chair. The room was heavy. Everyone stood still, waiting for someone to break the insufferable silence.

"Ugh, this is so stupid." Naruto grumbled. Earning the Hokage's attention, he continued. "Basically we're just gonna sit around all day stalking people? Where's all the action!?" He complained. The whole group stared at Naruto in awe. The audacity this boy had was unimaginable. They had all been trusted enough to be a part of something as serious as a B ranked mission. And Naruto was complaining?

"Would you like to lead the investigation yourself then, Naruto?" Lady Tsunade hissed. Veins popping through her forehead.

"Well I could probably do it better than you old farts." Naruto commented, crossing his arms. Lady Tsunade rolled her eyes, too exhausted to keep up with the blonde's antics.

"You're dismissed." She stated, opening a new bottle of Alcohol. Just before the large group made it outside of the office, Shikamaru opened his mouth.

"Grumpy much, you sleeping alright?" Shikamaru questioned. Directing his question at Naruto.

"Actually, it feels like I haven't slept in ages." Naruto revealed, letting out an over exaggerated yawn. Surprisingly, he wasn't lying. He really hadn't gotten any sleep recently. The blonde had been waking up in the middle of the night for weeks straight now. He'd been stuck alone with his thoughts far too many times, the only successful solution being sleep, but he rarely got any of that anymore.

"Aw, might I need Kakashi to come read you a bedtime story?" Shizune intervened. She had obviously overheard Shikamaru and Naruto's small conversation.

"I think I could fit that in my schedule. Would you like me to bring a blanket and some warm milk as well?" Kakashi probed, tilting his head.

Naruto stepped back in awe. "I'm not some goddamn baby!" He yelled, embarrassed by this whole conversation.

"Well maybe if you didn't act like one we wouldn't be having this conversation." Kakashi teased. Turning another page in his book. Their slightly heated argument continued, while Lady Tsunade grew more and more irritated with the two ninjas.

"Oh for god's sake get out of my office!" Lady Tsunade interrupted. She had work to do, cases to solve, and alcohol to drink.

"You can't tell me what to do." Naruto mumbled, turning around.

"Excuse me?" Lady Tsunade seethed. Chakra slowly moved to her fists.

"I said you can't tell me what to do you old hag!!" The boy screeched at her. He had more he wanted to say but was quickly dragged outside by Shizune and Kakashi.

"YOU-"

Sakura quickly slammed the door shut, preventing any further embarrassment and injury.

"Naruto, look at what you did!" Sakura scolded, stomping her foot. Naruto sighed, he had become well accustomed to sitting through Sakura's earfuls. The blonde learned to let all of it go in one ear and out the other. However, Kakashi who also wasn't in the mood to deal with an angry Sakura, decided to quickly avert the topic before the girl gets to the reasons Naruto should get kicked off the team.

"Why don't we all get some ramen? My treat." Kakashi probed, flipping another page in his book. This book was finally getting interesting, it had had taken 17 chapters just for the first kiss but the Hatake definitely didn't expect that kiss to turn into-

"Yeah! Let's do that!" Naruto shouted, pumping his fist's in the air. "Race ya there!" The boy yelled, getting into his running stance.

"Now, now Naruto before you go we have to talk about our plan for the upcoming mission." Kakashi said, picking him up by the back of Naruto's jumpsuit. The copy ninja scrunched his eyebrows, silently noting that he had less of a challenge picking the blonde up than he did before. It was hard to tell from the baggy bright orange jumpsuit he practically bathes in everyday, but he definitely was lighter, that being a result of his training or..something else.. He hoped things all along those lines hadn't gotten to any of his students yet. Especially Naruto. He was the beam of light for their team. The lovable knucklehead. But then again, the world is a cruel and harsh place. And no one knew that better than Kakashi Hatake himself.

"Ughhh" Naruto groaned. "Can we talk about all this at the ramen place, I haven't even eaten breakfast yet!" Kakashi sighed, letting go of the blonde.

"For once, I agree with Naruto, the power of youth cannot grow without the proper nutrition!!" Rock Lee stated, shoving his fist in the air.

"Ramen isn't even healthy, Lee." Tenten chuckled.

The run-down ramen shop slowly started to appear in the distance. It had always been such a relief for Naruto, every time the ramen shop came into view. It was his only true home. He felt truly respected and listened to each time he was welcomed into the shop. The closer they got, the stronger the scent of freshly made noodles and seasonings filled the afternoon air, it was such a nostalgic smell for Naruto, one he could never forget. The large group slowly approached the building making sure everyone was all together, once the jounin confirmed everyone was accounted for they walked in.

"Welcome!" Ayame greeted, a warm smile painting her tanned face. She motioned for them to take a seat. Moments after, Teuchi made a sudden appearance.

"Ah Naruto! How've you been, my boy?" Teuchi questioned, smiling. A warm feeling attacked Naruto's heart. Every time he sat down at this restaurant he felt prioritized and worth something.

"I've been good! These missions are super boring though." Naruto complained with a slight smile, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I'm guessing your usual?" Ayama questioned with a wink.

"You guessed it." Naruto chuckled, giving a thumbs up. The two continued on, asking everyone for their orders while Kakashi began laying out papers.

"Team 7 has been assigned file A, Team 8 has been assigned file B, Team 10 has been assigned file C, and finally Team Guy has been assigned file D." Kakashi stated, passing the files out to each team. Sakura divided the papers and handed them out to Sasuke and Naruto.

"Hey! Why did Sasuke get more papers than me?" Naruto asked, annoyed at the obvious favoritism.

"Would you just shut up and read?" Sasuke intervened, his eyebrow twitching in annoyance.

"You wanna say that again?!" Naruto growled, standing up.

"Naruto, sit down and finish reading. Or would you like to pay for your ramen?" Kakashi questioned, crossing his arms.

Reluctantly Naruto sat back down, eyes studying the folder. He was hesitant to open it, as the shocked expressions from his teammates added even more of a reason not to. Things like this never sat right with him. Meaningless murder, ending someone's life as if it meant nothing. Failing to see the value of a human life. Naruto saw life as a precious thing, even if he barely valued his own. It was something to be nurtured, not thrown away. Yes, he's a hypocrite and aware of it.

"Oh my god, look at this guy, doesn't he just look like a murderer?" Ino giggled, pointing at the paper.

Grabbing the paper from Ino's hands, Sakura agreed. "You're so right! His nose is so hideous I know he's the murderer!"

"Look at this guy!" Kiba interrupted, looking over at the two girls. Shoving his paper in their faces. They continued on as Naruto looked back down at his papers, glancing at the pictures that went along with the seemingly never ending paragraphs. His eyebrows scrunched. They all seemed pretty average to him. None of them had such a 'distinguishing feature' that could point to them being a murderer.

"Ahem, the suspects don't just consist of weird looking people, the murderer could be anyone, in fact it could even be one of us. You really never know." Kakashi intervened, silencing the groups. Hopefully they processed the impact of his words.

"It's you."

A smooth voice said in Naruto's left ear. He shot up from his seat, startled by the loud voice.

"W-what're you talking about! It could never be me!" He exclaimed, looking around searching for the perpetrator, only to be greeted by confused faces.

"Nobody's pointing a finger at you, Naruto." Neji stated, rolling his eyes.

"But someone just sai-"

"Naruto, I think your lack of sleep is really catching up to you." Shikamaru cut him off, causing the group to erupt in laughter. Successfully lifting the mood.

As their laughter faded Naruto continued to ponder what he heard. At least what he thought he heard? He understands that he can come off as annoying at times but most definitely not a murderer. Naruto being a murderer, that's laughable. He would never bring himself to do such a thing.

"Here ya go, Naruto!" Ayame said cheerfully, placing the bowl of ramen in front of Naruto. The boy flashed a cheeky smile and picked up his chopsticks. He stared down at the bowl, eyeing the noodles and fish cake. The broth was almost a burgundy color, strangely reminding him of blood.

After only a few bites, a wave of nausea washed over him. He felt dizzy. The craving he once had for ramen had rapidly decreased. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, placing his chopsticks back down. This had been the fourth time this week he got nauseous eating something he considered to be his favorite.

"You good, Naruto?" Choji asked, mouthfuls of ramen occupying his mouth. His sudden comment caused the group to look towards the blonde boy. Naruto quickly threw his hands in the air, waving it off.

"I think my stomach's just upset from something I ate this morning." He chuckled awkwardly. Kakashi slightly tilted his head, uncovering the lie as Naruto just said earlier he hadn't eaten this morning.

"What? Did you drink some bad milk again?" Sasuke teased with a smirk. Naruto shook his head, appalled at the memory.

"No I didn't. But if my milk went bad I know yours would be ten times worse! Not to mention moldy and disgusting!!" Naruto argued proudly. The petty banter continued back and forth.

By the end of it the room was full of laughter. Smiles on everyone's faces. Although Naruto's stomach still hurt he smiled to himself. Looking at the people he had somehow managed to grow close too. He's aware they might not all be fond of him, but he's glad he's finally found people that will fight besides him, and somewhat tolerate him.

It took him so long to find, after years of loneliness it feels good to finally be laughing and surrounded by friends.

I wish it could always stay like this.