Chapter 112

I'd cried since Dan left. I couldn't hold on to anything without killing it. Anything that depended on me would be sorely let down. He was a cat. I shouldn't be crushed, but it was almost as painful as losing Joshua. In some ways, I was like a recovering addict. They're not supposed to be in romantic relationships until they've completed a year of sobriety, and then programs suggest trying to keep a house plant alive for a year before embarking on a pet. I had done it all. I wasn't an addict, but I'd endured months of extensive counseling-I'd followed the rules. First Joshua, now my cat. It just didn't make sense except I was toxic to anything dependent upon me.

The beating on my door scared the crap out of me. I was hesitant to go to the door at almost midnight. I approached quietly to see if I could see who was on the porch before I turned on the light.