Chapter 36 : Only You

Sobrang tahimik pa rin nila at hindi ko alam kung bakit! Hindi ko naman kasi sila matingnan dahil nananatili kaming nagtititigan ni Chal Raed.

Hay, tama na nga! Sobrang naiilang na'ko.

"G-Gutom na ako, kayo ba?"sabi ko nang matigil na rin 'tong katahimikan.

"Oh, I'm sorry, let's eat," nakangiting sabi ni Chal Raed. Kumuha na rin siya ng kung ano-anong mga pagkain at inilagay 'yon sa plato ko.

"Wow! That was the first time I heard, Raed, said I love you to a lady," wala sa sariling sabi ni Tita TS. Si Spade naman ay todo ngisi at si Third ay nakangiting nakatingin sa'min ng Kuya niya. Jusko, parang botong-boto naman sila sa'kin, oy.

"Well, this is also the first time I fall in love, sincerely," sagot naman ni Chal Raed na kasalukuyang kumakain na. "And, this will be the last," dugtong pa niya. Hindi ko tuloy maiwasang mapatingin sa kanya. Hanggang ngayon ay naloloka pa rin ako, nahihirapan pa rin akong isink-in na mahal niya na raw ako, nag I love you na, eh. Akala ko gusto niya lang ako, pero huta, lumevel-up na pala. Legit real quick! "Eat...and you can just stare at me later," pakiramdam ko namula ako sa hiya nang sabihin niya 'yan. Hindi ko naman kasi namalayang titig na titig na ako! Mighad! Nakakahiya lang, todo ngiti na nga 'yong tatlo, eh, nakakahiya talaga! Ikakain ko na lang 'to!

***

"Maundy, bumabalik-balik ka lang dito, ha?" nakangiting sabi ni Tita TS. Kung pwede lang, eh, kaya lang dapat isama ko 'yong mga Kuya ko nang mapanatag 'yon kung saan-saang lugar ba ako pumupunta. Yes, matanda na ako, pero mind you again super OA ng mga Kuya ko, okay? Okay.

"Opo, Tita TS, thank you po sa free lunch," nakangiti kong sabi at bahagya naman siyang natawa.

"If you'll come here again, Monang, please bring Joy," biglang singit ni Spade. Feel ko talaga nagkakamabutihan na ulit sila, tsaka panay ang pagngiti-ngiti ng Bruha at mukhang in love na in love talaga 'yong awra niya. Minsan nga magkaconduct ako ng meeting nang mapag-usapan namin 'tong pagbabagong nangyayari sa mga buhay namin.

"And, bring Clarice, too," sabi naman ni Third. Isa pa 'tong in love na in love. Haaay! Romance na romance na 'yong story.

"Sige ba," sagot ko na lang para wala ng follow-up habilin 'tong mga 'to.

"Can I get her now? We still have work," biglang singit ni Chal Raed sabay hawak sa kamay ko—chansing!

"Okay, you can go now, please take good care of her," nakangiting sabi ni Spade.

"I will and will always do," sagot naman ng Kuya niya. Always, ha, let's see.

"Take care!" pahabol pa ni Tita TS at kumaway na rin ako sa kanila.

"Let's go?" pinagbuksan niya na ako ng pinto at ewan ko ba, basta lihim akong napangiti, "bye, Miss TS, bye crazy and silly Baby Bros," pang-aasar pa niya saka siya nagpuntang driver's seat.

Buong byahe ay nagkwentuhan lang kami, tungkol sa sasakyan ni Third, hindi naman daw niya talaga ibebenta 'yon, inaasar niya lang talaga 'yong kapatid niya. Napag-usapan din namin kung gaano kabait si Miss TS at kung gaano ito kung mag-alaga sa mga anak niya. Haaay! Sarap magkaroon ng nanay. Pero, alam niyo bang hindi namin napag-usapan 'yong I love you niya? Hindi rin naman niya inopen-up kaya hindi na rin ako nagtanong.

"Do your work now so you'll finish it early," aniya nang makapasok kami sa opisina. Akmang pupunta na ito sa opisina niya, pero agad ko siyang tinawag.

"Iyong...tungkol sa sinabi mo," ewan, basta gusto ko lang talagang klaruhin kung totoo ba 'yon o chinacharcharan niya lang ako, "totoo ba 'yon?"

"Ang alin? That I love you?" tanong niya at nyeta, medyo nahiya ako. "I mean it, Maundy, I love you," sinsero niya talagang sabi. Hutaaaa! 'Yong tibok ng puso ko, naaaning na!

"B-Bakit? I mean, akala ko kasi nahulog ka lang sa'kin, ibig bang sabihin no'n in love ka na sa'kin? Hindi na ba 'yan gusto? Sandali, medyo naguguluhan kasi ako."

Huta talaga! Saan na 'yong laude-laude natin, Maundy? Nabobo na yata tayo, eh!

"Hinangaan na kita, ginusto na kita, ngayon mamahalin naman kita...hanggang sa wakas," lumapit siya sa'kin at hinawakan 'yong kamay ko, huta lambot talaga, "makinig kang mabuti, Maundy. Oo, isa akong Bakla, pero may puso pa rin ako. Oo bali 'yong meter stick ko, pero kaya kong ipa-straight 'to, ora mismo! Kung para lang naman sa'yo, handa akong magbago. This may super duper unexpected to the highest level raises to 9 times 9, but the Baklush has fallen in you, Lady, fallen in love to be exact. I don't know when it was started, but I am certain, I love you, I really do," sobrang seryoso niya talagang sabi at lahat 'yan biglang tumambay sa isipan at puso ko! Korni, pero totoo.

"You don't have to change yourself hurriedly, Chal Raed. I will accept you no matter who you are, mabakla ka man o lalaki, tanggap kita. I may not be certain of what I am feeling, but I know, I'm happy every time I'm with you," I said out of myself. Huta! Napa-english pa ang lola niyo, oh.

"Mas masaya ako," grabe, ang lagkit ng tinginan niya. Haay, tunaw na ako, charot, "let's not rush things, Maundy, I can wait until you're certain of your feelings. But for now, let's work first because we need to do something later," iginaya na niya ako paupo sa swivel chair. Binigyan niya pa muna ako ng isang ngiti saka siya tuluyang pumasok sa opisina niya.

Haaaay! Mother Earth, kakaiba rin ang kamandag niya.

Chal Raed's POV

I had placed my table near the window so that every time I needed an inspiration I'll just stare at her, endlessly, and then charan! I am fully charged!

I can clearly see Maundy from my position, she's doing something on her laptop. I couldn't help myself not to smile while staring straight at her. She suddenly stopped and had a glance at the red tulips I gave earlier. I don't know what's in her mind right now, but I hope, it's me, my feelings, me, me, and me.

I let out a deep sigh. I can still remember the words I uttered to her a while ago in front of my family. It's really not intended, but it's what my heart and my mind had been telling me to say. I knew that it was very surprising, but I just couldn't stop myself. Gusto kong sabihin sa kanyang mahal ko siya kahit hindi ko alam kung kaya niya ba 'yong suklian, basta gusto ko lang maging totoo sa nararamdaman ko.

But seriously, confessing my feelings for her was planned already, kaya lagi ko siyang sinasabihan na maging ready na siya sa mga mangyayari the next days, pero hindi ko inaasahang mapapaaga. Wala, eh, selos na selos na ako. Hindi ko mapigilan, kaya kahit mga kapatid ko and my best friend, pinagseselosan ko. I am afraid na baka biglaan siyang mapunta sa iba. Thanks to Jazz for waking me up, kasi kung hindi pa rin ako nagising at patuloy lang na kampante, she'll probably in the arms of another guy in the future. Kaya ngayon, sinusunod ko na lang 'yong puso at isip ko and I always ask for God's guidance na sana tama 'yong ginagawa ko.

I remember what she'd said that I don't have to change myself so soon, she'll accept me no matter what kind of sexuality I have, but I really am wanting to change, I want to become fully straight, a real man...but I still can't avoid my gestures, it's still girly!! But, God knows how I badly want to change myself just for her. Siguro dadahan-dahanin ko na lang. I know someday soon, I can be the man she's seeking as her future husband.

'God, if ever this woman will give me her sweetest yes, I won't ever let go of her till the end. I'll always hold her hand, hug her, kiss her on her forehead, eyes, nose, cheeks, lips, everywhere, I'll respect her, value, and will always love her till my last breath.'

"So, just be mine, Maundy, I swear, I'll give you my all," I uttered out of myself as she turned her head at me and our eyes met.

She waved, and my smile never fades. She gets her phone and I received a phone call from her. "Oy," she said as I hit the answer button. "Akala ko ba work-work na muna, nakatitig ka lang yata sa'kin, eh," and that's how feeler she is—kidding!

"How did you know that I'm just staring at you, eh nakatalikod ka nga sa'kin," I saw how she pouted when I told her my reply, "may mata likuran mo?" I pulled some joke, but she remained poker-faced.

"Oo na, sabi ko nga 'di mo ko tinitingnan. Magtrabaho na tayo," she turned her swivel chair and faced her laptop, "bababa ko na," she was about to end the call, but I stopped her immediately.

"I'm staring at you, the whole time," I said. "I'm thinking about you...only you," I added with my whole sincerity. Muli niya akong tiningnan at sumibol naman ang loko-loko niyang ngiti. Her smile seems like it's teasing me.

"Yiieee, ang mais!" sabi na, eh, tinitripan niya ako kung saan I'm damn serious! "Charot! Kinilig ako ng slight," she said with a smile. Pakiramdam ko parang napawi 'yong konting pagka-asar ko.

"Let's end the call, I need to tell you something," she nodded and I went out of my office right away.

"Ano 'yong sasabihin mo?" tanong niya matapos kong maupo sa harap niya.

"I'll send you home later," I answered.

"H-Huh? B-Bakit?" she seems worried, but I didn't bother myself asking baka naman mali lang ako ng pagkakaintindi kung ba't siya nautal.

"I want to meet your brothers."

"Ano? Ayoko! Haharutin mo lang sila," that's it, kaya pala siya nag-aalala kanina. Tsk!

"Come on, Maundy, I'll only do harot to you," sabi ko with my serious tone, but I'm just kidding, honestly. "I want to meet your brothers to personally and formally ask for their permission to court you. I want my courtship to be legalized."

She was startled and she didn't give me an answer right after I told her the reason why I want to send her home and meet her brothers. I honestly am feeling nervous, this will be my first time to go to someone's place just to have a proper courting. First-time ko nga kasing manligaw ng babae.

Wish me luck and may God bless me!