The Angel Drops a Bomb

Exams were returned and results announced, and Amane and the other second-year

students reached a period of relative calm. Club activities resumed, and all they had to

do was prepare for Sports Day, the next upcoming event, in about three weeks' time.

Some students, depending on their scores, had to take supplementary lessons, as well

as supplementary exams for certain subjects. But Amane was in the clear, so during

this brief period of calm, he spent his time taking it easy.

Talking with Yuuta after school, Amane got a strained smile from his friend when he

brought the topic up.

"I don't actually have much down time, though," Yuuta said. "I've got club activities,

and I have to practice for the interscholastic athletics competition."

Yuuta had already become known as the ace of the track and field club in his first year,

and the coaches and managers had more expectations of him. He never failed to put

in the effort to live up to those.

Yuuta had once called Amane "stoic," but from Amane's perspective, that word

described Yuuta more than him. It was probably exactly that earnest effort that made

him so popular and well-liked.

"Oh, that's right, it's still a ways off, but the chance to show off your accomplishments

is coming up, huh?"

"Mmm. With the competitions approaching, I'm gonna need to shorten my times more,

but I don't mind since I like to run anyway."

"Will you be all right? My image of the track club is that it's pretty demanding."

"Maybe it is, but it's not like the club is ancient Sparta or anything. The coach knows

you can't get good results just by going all out every day. There's a balance to it: We

rest during break times, and when it's time for club activities, we work hard."

"Huh… sounds like it's definitely an enthusiastic club."

"I think it does require discipline and motivation, but if it was one of those high-energy

clubs with no time to rest, I probably would have quit already. If I'm just running, I can

do that anywhere. That's probably why Shirakawa quit."

"…Oh yeah, she went to the same middle school as you and Itsuki, right?"

"Yeah, she did. Itsuki and Shirakawa are both so different now compared to back then,

you'd probably be shocked."

Now that Yuuta mentioned it, Amane remembered hearing that Chitose's personality

was quite different than it had been in middle school. He hadn't known any of them at

that time, so it was difficult for him to imagine.

The only version of Itsuki and Chitose that he knew was the cheerful couple and

constant life of the party.

Their past didn't seem like a topic that they liked to discuss much, so Amane hadn't

probed deeply, but they must have changed considerably if it was enough for Yuuta to

mention.

Amane was curious. But on the other hand, with an expression that said he was

worried about upsetting Itsuki and Chitose by saying too much, Yuuta related gently,

"I'm not going to talk about it, but maybe they'll tell you themselves sometime."

Amane had no intention of forcing the information out of him, so he nodded with

understanding. Itsuki didn't butt into Amane's personal life, so Amane decided he

wouldn't go sticking his fingers into his friends' pasts, either.

"Going back to the topic of track and field, getting too obsessed and running

mindlessly only leads to injuring your muscles and tendons. For me, you know,

running track is important, but it's not everything in life. So I'm pretty happy with the

way the club does it."

His smile was so dazzling that Amane had to squint to look at him. Looking a little

embarrassed, Yuuta made an awkward face.

"Well, that's enough about me, right?" he said. "Let's forget about club activities for

now; we've got the day off."

"You're the one who brought it up."

"That's true, so all the more reason to put a pin in that. Come on, let's go home."

Amane laughed quietly at Yuuta, who was clearly trying to change the subject, and the

two of them left the classroom.

Itsuki and Chitose happened to not have any supplemental lessons that day and had

apparently left earlier to go on a date. It worked out that club activities were off for

the day as well, so Amane wanted to seize the chance to hang out with Yuuta. While

chatting casually after school for a bit, they'd decided to stop somewhere on the way

back home.

As they walked down the hallway, Amane spotted a familiar flash of gold farther down

the hall. He looked again, thinking to himself that it would be unusual for her to still

be at school, and saw that for some reason, she was holding a large quantity of

printouts in both arms.

"…What are you up to, Shiina?"

"Oh, Fujimiya and Kadowaki! It's unusual to see you still here at this time. Especially

you, Fujimiya."

"I could say that right back at you… What's up with those?"

Amane pointed at the printouts that she was struggling to hold with both hands, and

gave a small, wry smile.

"The teachers asked for students who had time to help staple together printouts for

next month's Sports Day. I couldn't say no… they just gave them to me."

"…You don't feel like you're being exploited for free labor?"

For better or worse, the teachers depended on Mahiru as much as the other students.

Amane had witnessed her getting constantly saddled with odd jobs, and this seemed

like one of them.

Mahiru was a prodigy who did well in school and at sports, but she wasn't a member

of any school clubs, so she was often given work from teachers who thought she had

an abundance of free time. They probably knew she could never turn down a favor

due to her kind nature.

"I do have time to spare, so… I'll be done with this pretty quickly. This is the last bunch

that I'm taking to an empty classroom, and once I've carried it all over, I just have to

staple them, and then I'm done."

"What does the school have secretaries for, then?"

"Well… it's fine. Despite what it looks like, I'll be done in a little over an hour."

"But you're talking about voluntarily giving up over an hour of your own time!"

Amane had some complicated feelings about Mahiru being a model student and

getting exploited by the teachers in situations like this. But Mahiru either didn't mind

or was just used to it, so Amane relaxed and gave her a weak smile.

"Anyway, that's why I wanted to let you know I'm going to be a little late getting home

today, by about an hour or so. But the sun has been setting later, too, so I'll be fine."

Mahiru said this like it was nothing, and Amane sighed softly.

"…Sorry, Kadowaki, could we push today's hangout to another day?'

"What a coincidence, I was just thinking that."

It seemed the two had been thinking the same thing.

Amane and Yuuta looked at each other and smiled, then casually grabbed the printouts

from Mahiru's hands.

Mahiru must not have been expecting it. She blinked several times, stunned, and

seemed to take a minute to understand what had happened. Then, she grabbed

Amane's sleeve in a panic.

"F-Fujimiya, give those back!"

"Where are you taking them?" Amane asked.

"Umm, to an open classroom on the second floor… but that's not the point!" she

insisted. "I was asked to do this."

"It's not like they have anything confidential written on them, since they gave them to

a student," he said. "And anyway, they didn't say you couldn't have help, did they?"

"Th-that's true, but… say something, please, Kadowaki!"

"Ah-ha-ha! Fujimiya, you can't do that," Yuuta mock-scolded. "You have to let me carry

half."

"Here ya go."

Smiling at Mahiru's grumpy look, Amane handed half of the papers to Kadowaki.

Mahiru seemed to realize that it was pointless to protest any further.

Amane could feel her reproachful eyes on him but let her gaze slide right off as he

headed for the classroom she had indicated.

"…I didn't mean to steal your time from you," Mahiru muttered.

"Nobody's stealing my time. I'm using it as I please."

Amane was doing it completely voluntarily. There was an argument to be made that

he felt compelled to do her this favor, but it was better than Mahiru toiling away alone.

Yuuta was smiling calmly and seemed to agree, so she ultimately gave up on saying

anything else. She glared at Amane with a tiny bit of resentment, which he pretended

not to notice.

Despite it all, Mahiru didn't stop them. He figured she probably just didn't know how

to respond to the favor.

"…You dummy."

She insulted him outright in an adorable way that he had never seen her do at school

before. Both Amane and Yuuta burst into laughter.

Mahiru, whose angel mask had slipped off a little bit, narrowed her eyes as she walked

beside the boys—

"So not only does she curry favor with the teachers, she's flirting with boys, too. All

while telling us that she's got an 'important person' or whatever."

"Seriously. She's such a suck-up."

Amane heard voices from somewhere, and he felt his body stiffen as he walked. He

glanced around but couldn't see any girls who might have been the voices' owners. He

decided they were probably somewhere behind him.

Beside him, Yuuta's smile didn't change, but the look in his eyes was serious. Amane

remembered him confessing once that he absolutely hated people who spread gossip,

so it didn't seem like he would be able to forgive what they just heard.

Even Amane was on the verge of saying something, but he knew that would just make

things worse, so he kept his mouth shut and peered over at Mahiru.

Mahiru didn't seem to think anything of it and had on her usual calm expression, as if

she was accustomed to such treatment.

That expression made him uneasy, and without meaning to, he found himself staring

at Mahiru. She must have noticed, because she put on a gentle smile and said, "Thank

you ever so much for helping me. Let's finish this up before it gets too late, shall we?"

Her voice was calm and collected, and both Amane and Yuuta nodded, unable to say

anything further.

The three of them worked in awkward silence, and once they had finished the job,

Mahiru left for home first. After waiting a while to stagger their times, Amane headed

back as well.

When he returned to his apartment, he took a long look at Mahiru's face.

Her expression was the same as always, and no sign of hurt or anger darkened her

beautiful face. Instead, it was Amane who felt irritated as he recalled those girls'

words.

Mahiru noticed the sour look on Amane's face, and she quickly gave him a bitter smile.

"Are you perhaps worrying about what happened at school earlier?"

"…It's bothering me."

Of course, he was going to get angry at people who wouldn't say anything to her face

but snuck around in the shadows bad-mouthing her.

Amane sat down beside Mahiru and took another long look at her; she was smiling at

his behavior like she always did.

"That kind of stuff doesn't bother me so much. I expect that degree of gossip, actually;

it would be stranger not to hear it."

Amane was the only one who was bothered by it and by Mahiru's total, nonchalant

acceptance of the idea that some people hated her.

He knew the reason why Mahiru conducted herself as an angel, so it was surprising

that it didn't upset her, and his awkward expression showed it.

"I-is that really how it is?"

"It's only natural, right? It's not like everyone is going to like me, you know. It would

be kind of scary if a person like that existed," Mahiru said quietly and dispassionately,

twirling a piece of hair around her fingertip as if she was bored.

"I think that I make it easy for people to like me," she continued, "but I doubt that

works for every single person in school. It's just that all the kind voices are usually

louder and easier to hear. The supportive voices of kind people just help block out the

hate. I mean, even you didn't like me that much at first, I think."

"…It truly pains me to hear you say that, but…"

Sure, before he had gotten to know Mahiru, when he had only known her by her

reputation, Amane had thought of her as someone who excelled in everything and was

beautiful. He knew that she was desirable due to those traits.

But he would say he fell into the category of people who didn't particularly care much

for the angel, at least not on a personal level. When everything about her had seemed

too perfect, he'd found her almost unapproachable.

"Especially among the girls," Mahiru said, "there are people who act friendly on the

surface, when they actually hate me. Since so many people admire me, they bad-mouth

me to mask their own insecurities. I just try to get along with as many people as I can.

It makes everything easier, you see."

Mahiru matter-of-factly evaluated her position relative to the people who hated her.

Amane wasn't sure what he could possibly say in response.

He figured that girls and boys must live in different worlds, with different rules for

human interactions. If Mahiru was telling him this, it probably meant that there were

people out there who shunned her, and she had really heard them say such things

before.

He wasn't able to come up with the right words and couldn't do anything but sit there

uneasily. Mahiru must have noticed, because she relaxed into a smile.

"There are way fewer of them now, but there have always been a certain percentage

of people who hate me, so I'm used to it. I'm careful to conduct myself in a way that

reduces that number as much as possible, but it will never be zero. There are some

people who detest me because the majority likes me."

"…Isn't that painful?"

"Well, I'm sure I wouldn't like it very much if anyone ever said it to my face, but to date,

no one has made such a declaration. Besides, I'm sure that people like the ones today

who say they hate me aren't talking about the real me; they just resent my outward

appearance and social standing. There's not really anything I can do about that, so I

don't plan to try."

"That's very pragmatic…"

"If I wasn't pragmatic about it, I wouldn't be able to stand acting the way I do at school."

Mahiru, who was more disciplined than anyone Amane knew, had a quiet, thoughtful

look in her eyes. A small sigh escaped her lips.

"I am aware that, objectively, I have more attractive features than many other people,"

she said. "Some of it is genetic, but I also put a lot of work into my appearance. There

are people who find me superficial just because I value that."

Her words weren't an exaggeration or presumptuous in any way; they were the

foundation for her self-confidence.

Certainly, Amane was not about to deny her natural beauty, especially having seen her

mother, who she took after.

But Mahiru's charms didn't lie in the features she had inherited.

Her demeanor and conduct, the way she wielded her gaze and her expressions, the

very atmosphere that surrounded her… she had not been born with any of those

things, but they were what made her truly lovely. Amane thought that her remarkable

intelligence and personal character were more beautiful than even her outward

appearance.

…Still, she is very pretty…

Mahiru's willpower was so brilliant, it seemed like he would be burned by the

radiance. Mahiru herself seemed like she also might be scorched by that light, and it

was a little scary.

"I put a lot of effort into things you can't see on the surface, you know. That's why some

people who can only see the end result assume that I must be cheating somehow. And

their feelings of envy aren't my responsibility. Of course, if I was able to correct one

thing, I think it would be the way people talk about me and Kadowaki. We get along

well, but there's absolutely nothing romantic going on between us. People

misunderstand that and get jealous, which is bothersome."

"I… I see…"

"I mean, have I ever behaved like I was into him? I think he's a considerate and likeable

guy, but I don't have any romantic feelings toward him at all. But people start

speculating if I so much as talk to him, and it's annoying."

What seemed to really bother her was the sheer frequency of the rumors.

Mahiru and Yuuta, who had been transformed into idols of sorts by their schoolmates,

were often paired up in people's minds, since they were both role models to their

respective sexes.

In reality, they barely interacted. When Mahiru had made Amane's acquaintance, she

at best knew of Yuuta as a popular guy on campus but hadn't known him personally.

They only became friends when Amane started hanging out with him.

Amane had never suspected that Mahiru had any romantic feelings toward Yuuta. She

had always treated the "prince" of the school with impartiality.

"Maybe to the girls crushing on Kadowaki, it looks like he's already taken," Amane said.

"Most guys, if you approached them, Mahiru, would go crazy for you."

"Hmm, it doesn't seem like you're in that group, Amane."

"…Well…"

He was already completely infatuated, no approach necessary. He felt like nothing she

did would change how deep his feelings of love for her were, but he couldn't tell her

that.

Amane glanced nervously about as he tried to come up with a response, but Mahiru

was staring directly at him.

He couldn't stand the pressure, so he looked away from her, but he saw her sigh from

out of the corner of his eye.

"At any rate, Kadowaki isn't my type. Objectively, he is very handsome, and quite the

well-mannered gentleman, too, but… how do I put this…? In some ways, our situations

are similar, so I'm happy to have him as an acquaintance or friend, maybe even as

someone I can look to for support. But I don't feel like any of that is leading toward us

falling in love."

"…I guess when you think about it, you and Kadowaki do have some things in

common," Amane agreed. "Though there's not such a big difference between his public

and private self as there is between yours."

This was something that Amane had come to understand recently as he'd gotten to

know Yuuta better. Like her, Yuuta also tended to try to act the way that everybody

expected him to. However, it wasn't as obvious as when Mahiru did it, and he usually

let some of his real personality show through.

Mahiru had no choice but to act the way she did because of her family background.

The reason she did it and the degree to which she had to maintain the act were

different, so they were similar but not the same.

"You make it sound like I have a split personality… A-are my public and private selves

really that different?"

"They are, but how can I put this… Your true self is much cuter than your angel

persona. At first, well, you seemed cool and serious, but once I got to know you, I found

you to be an honest person who's much shier than I expected. The way you express

emotions with your words and actions is completely different, too, so… yeah, there's

a difference, you know?"

"Wh-who exactly do you think is making me act like this?"

"…That's, well, hmm. It's not on purpose."

It wasn't that he was doing it intentionally. It was just that Mahiru got embarrassed

easily whenever someone gave her an honest compliment.

Amane understood perfectly well that she had always been a hard worker and very

disciplined, so he had been trying to give her frank, genuine praise as often as he could.

If that brought out her bashful side, well, it was too late to do anything about that.

"I think it's even more wicked of you to do it not on purpose, though."

"You could say the same thing about yourself. You're the heartless one, Mahiru."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"…In your case, you've been getting more and more touchy, and it's hard to deal with."

Mahiru especially had no room to criticize Amane. She had a talent for making people

blush and used it quite often. To make matters worse, she often carried out surprise

attacks, forcing Amane into difficult tests of willpower on a daily basis.

At the word "touchy," Mahiru's large eyes opened even wider, and she blinked several

times. Then she gasped, and her lip started trembling.

Amane couldn't help but notice a deep red slowly staining her cheeks.

"I-it's not on purpose." Once she'd reached a lovely shade of cherry, Mahiru offered

this excuse in a wavering voice. "There are times when I do touch you on purpose, but

I never meant to make you uncomfortable."

"I have several questions about your definition of 'on purpose,' but I know that you

didn't really mean anything by it. You should just be careful, though, because if a girl

does stuff like that too often, someone could get the wrong idea."

"…I only do it with you."

"I know that, too. That's why I'm telling you."

Amane couldn't be certain what kind of feelings Mahiru had toward him, but he knew

she thought he was special, and that she liked him.

Still, he was a guy, and her thoughtless contact often troubled him. He thought he'd

appreciate it if she toned it down a little, for his sanity's sake if nothing else.

When he looked in Mahiru's direction, Amane noticed that her face was still very red.

Mahiru smacked his upper arm playfully.

"See? That's what I'm talking about," he protested.

"That time was on purpose."

"Okay…"

Mahiru gave Amane a bit of a scowl. He didn't understand what he'd done wrong. Even

though she was glaring at him, the expression on her face and the embarrassment in

her eyes made her look nothing if not adorable.

Amane got the feeling that if he told her she looked more cute than scary, she'd

probably be even angrier.

So, he didn't say anything at all, and Mahiru cleared her throat and straightened up.

"Anyway, back to what we were talking about earlier," she said. "It doesn't really bother

me that some girls hate me. It's a childish dream to think that everyone will always get

along, after all, and I know it'd only cause more problems trying to force it, so I've

accepted that certain people just won't like me."

"…Mm-hmm."

"This contradicts what I was saying earlier, but after pretending to be nice and acting

the part of the angel that everyone adores for so long, recently I've started to think

that maybe I've had enough."

"Really?"

Amane never expected to hear those words from Mahiru, who maintained her angelic

persona with such tireless consistency, and he thoughtlessly repeated her words back

to her.

Mahiru smiled faintly. "I've been thinking, maybe I don't need to be such a good girl…

I've always tried to keep up an act so that everyone will like me, even though I knew it

wouldn't work on everyone. But if I had someone who could discover the real me, and

really see me for who I am, I could be happy just being myself, I think."

Mahiru's eyes wavered with a certain lonesomeness as she thought back on her past

self, and soon her caramel-colored eyes shone brightly.

"You said you wouldn't take your eyes off me, right, Amane?"

Anyone could have seen that the light contained joyful hope for the future. It wasn't

sparklingly radiant, but gentle and kind, the sort that had real warmth and affection

in it.

As she gave him a look filled with such brightness and emotion, Amane gulped loudly.

"…I made a promise, so…"

"Yes, you did."

Mahiru's face melted into a broad smile at Amane's affirmation. Her expression

seemed dazzling and vibrant, different from the calm in her eyes, and he found that he

couldn't look away from her.

As though from somewhere far away, Amane felt his heart pounding hard as he tried

to sear the image of her smile into his memory.

"So that's why I don't have to get too worked up about anything. I'm not going to go

out of my way to change how I act at school, and I'm not going to worry too much

about it, either. It's all right, because I've got someone who sees me for who I am and

accepts me."

"…I see."

Because Amane had discovered the real Mahiru who had been huddled up inside, and

he was looking at her for who she was.

That was what let her stay calm.

Overwhelming feelings of joy and love welled up inside him, tickling his chest.

But a small lump also formed there, blocking that feeling just a little bit.

"…You look sort of dissatisfied, don't you?"

Mahiru had noticed that something was bothering Amane and turned to him with a

troubled, anxious look on her face. He couldn't say for sure that it was dissatisfaction

he was feeling, though.

"N-no, it makes me happy that you've started feeling that way. I think it's a great thing.

But it's just, well, I've just… got some thoughts."

"What is it? Tell me now."

"Ah, no, it's—"

"I'm not going to get mad or anything! I can't even imagine you saying anything to hurt

me."

The pressure of her eyes staring directly at him was enough to tell him he wouldn't

have the chance to refuse.

After all, Amane had also said some things that could be misinterpreted, and knew he

should explain himself, but—

He also believed that if he put what he was feeling into words, he might be setting

himself up to be teased for his immature emotions.

"Fine. D-don't laugh, okay?"

There was no way that he was going to get out of telling her, so he tried to warn her

first, and she nodded obediently. He found it unbearable to look at her directly, so

Amane averted his eyes somewhat from Mahiru and opened his mouth to continue.

"Now, you said you wouldn't get worked up…"

"Right," she answered.

"The thing is, sometimes you let your guard down and show your real self without

meaning to…" He made it that far, then hesitated to say any more, but it was too late to

stop, so Amane took a deep breath. His lip quivered as he carried on. "…And when I

think about another guy seeing you like that… I dunno, it makes me feel… conflicted."

He paused for a moment before reaching the conclusion of that thought, because he

knew right away how childish he sounded.

He was glad that Mahiru had accepted herself and was starting to change the way she

thought about things, and he was happy that she had extended a hand to him, after

spending many years wearing the same protective shell.

He was also happy that she had placed her wholehearted trust in him.

And he was overjoyed that she seemed to be coming to feel that she could be herself,

without keeping up false appearances.

He should have had no complaints, and yet he hated the idea of Mahiru—this

completely ordinary, sensitive girl, who always worked hard despite difficult

circumstances, who got lonely with surprising ease and was bad at depending on

others because she tended to put on a show of courage—he hated the idea of all the

other students at school getting to see that girl.

I know that it's just possessiveness and jealousy making me feel like this.

But that was what he truly felt, despite knowing that she didn't belong to him and that

he had no right to feel the way he did.

"L-look, I know that this sounds presumptuous, and that you'll probably want to tell

me off, but—"

Amane pursed his lips in self-derision, marveling at how shamefully pathetic he must

be. Mahiru looked at him, blinking her round, cute eyes in surprise, clearly taken

aback. Gradually, both corners of her lips started to curve upward.

By the time Amane noticed, she was already grinning, and her demeanor had changed

to something warm and cheerful.

"I—I thought I told you not to laugh!"

"Heh-heh, sorry!"

When Mahiru apologized with a wide, defenseless, cherubic smile completely free of

any ill will, it was all Amane could do to catch his breath. He couldn't offer any further

complaints.

It was a different type from the one she'd been wearing before, an expression in her

eyes of pure joy and affection that surpassed anything he had seen. It left Amane

speechless.

Mahiru let her smile drop just a little bit and fixed her eyes on Amane again. "…You

don't have to worry, Amane, I'm not going to show anyone else the kind of faces I show

you. There's no way I would feel comfortable enough with people I'm not close with."

"I—I see."

Amane was understandably relieved and became keenly aware that his emotions were

plainly visible on his face.

Usually, he was better at hiding his feelings, but when it came to Mahiru, no matter

what he did, the things he tried to conceal showed up on the surface.

"…You're such a cutie, Amane," Mahiru said, while smiling like something was funny.

Amane bit the inside of his cheek and squeezed, keeping his facial muscles locked in

place. "Stop that. You're making fun of me, aren't you?"

"I mean it," she insisted.

"That's uncalled for; quit it."

"You quit it, stop showing me such a cute side of you."

"I'm going to have to challenge that. I mean, what about me could possibly be

considered cute? And why would you say that to a guy?"

As someone who prided himself on shedding all his adorable traits, Amane didn't have

a clue what she meant.

Women and children could accept the word as a compliment, but Amane was a guy

and had no desire to be cute, so he could only take it as simple teasing.

He frowned and protested with his eyes, but Mahiru let out a little giggle that told him

her evaluation wasn't going to waver.

"Everything about you is endearing."

"I can't trust it when a girl says that, and I don't agree."

"What an awful thing to say. Well, you have to understand the fact that a girl's

definition of cute isn't just based on appearances but is more a sign of whether she

finds something likable in a broader sense… That's why you're definitely cute,

Amane!"

"Guys aren't happy about being called that, you know."

He did not appreciate the girl he liked choosing this way to compliment him.

Nonetheless, he was happy about the fact that she was praising him, but Amane would

never call a guy like himself adorable.

He thought about asking her why she thought he'd be happy that she called him cute,

but he got the feeling that she hadn't been trying to compliment him specifically so

much as just to state her own opinion, so there didn't seem to be any point.

Amane pressed his lips together tightly and looked at Mahiru, but she was still smiling

joyously. If he hadn't been able to see the affection in her eyes, he probably would have

pinched her cheeks right then.

"…Is there nothing attractive about me?" Amane grumbled quietly, without meaning

to.

Mahiru stiffened up and fixed her eyes on him, which made him immediately regret

his words.

Even for a pitiful loser like Amane, begging for compliments was too much. Anyway,

there was no chance that Mahiru thought of him as someone who was cool when he

had been told by plenty of other people that he was a lazy, pathetic late bloomer.

Amane averted his eyes, concluding that it was a mistake to even expect such words

from her. But Mahiru did not look away.

"You are attractive."

Amane couldn't believe his ears when he heard these clearly enunciated words.

"To be honest, you are cute, but you're also cool. More than anyone else, in my eyes."

"…You don't have to force yourself to flatter me."

"How rude. What would I get out of lying to you? I'm just saying what I think."

"…You're overstating it, and you have no taste in men."

Amane was working on becoming a better version of himself, but he didn't think he

was especially desirable. So even when Mahiru praised him, he couldn't let himself

believe her. Especially after she went on and on about how he was cute.

"So what is your definition of 'cool,' Amane?"

Amane was frowning, and Mahiru gently gazed at him.

"For me, I think to view a guy as charming, you need to take everything about his

personality into account, from the aura around him, to how he carries himself, to his

words, actions, and expressions. Thinking that attractiveness is only a matter of

appearance seems very superficial to me."

"W-well, that's true, but—"

"Looking at you objectively, I wouldn't say you're handsome enough to captivate

everyone who looks at you. But your face is well-proportioned, and like I said before,

appearances aren't the only thing that make someone appealing. You're maybe a little

sarcastic, but you're always polite, and you're well-mannered and gentlemanly and

kind. You're always reaching out to those in need even though you put on a show of

being cold and distant. You're cautious, but you're dependable when you need to be.

Looking at you all together, you are attractive, Amane. Of course, I can't deny that my

subjective opinion and personal preferences factor into that assessment, but you're

very cool, so please have a little more confidence."

"Th-that's enough, I get it, I hear you, so—"

"You don't get it. You don't have any self-confidence, so if I don't get serious and tell

you—"

"I said that's enough!"

Mahiru had gotten more insistent as she spoke, and before she even finished, Amane

had found himself groaning with embarrassment. If Mahiru flattered him any further,

he felt like he would burst into tears of shame, so he had to do something to stop her

from continuing to list his various merits. He took a deep breath to try to somehow

calm his heart, which was sending heat radiating up to his face, as if he wasn't

embarrassed enough already. He felt like his cheeks probably looked as red as ripe

apples, and that even Mahiru, who had just been praising him, would find it pathetic.

The fact that Mahiru held Amane in high regard had somehow sunk in—it was clear

to him, so he didn't need her to continue in any more detail. Her compliments only

made him heartsick. He felt such joy and shame at the idea that she valued him at all

that he couldn't stand to be there any longer. He wanted to run away.

Amane's eyes darted around as he desperately tried to shake off the heat and

humiliation that had overtaken his body.

Mahiru looked at him and smiled broadly, obviously delighted. "…That is what's so cute

about you, Amane."

It was a little late, but Amane finally understood what Mahiru was trying to say. He

glared at her; his face still flushed red.

"If you try to say anything more, I'll have to stop you somehow."

"…Oh, and how will you do that?"

"What do you mean, how? I'll manage, I'm sure."

"Well, you don't scare me one bit."

Mahiru didn't look like she was going to restrain herself. Still smiling, she gently

reached out toward Amane's face.

He could feel Mahiru's chilly fingers pressingagainst his feverish cheeks. Gently, she

turned his face so that he was looking directly at her.

"…No matter what you say, even if you don't think it's true, to me, you are attractive,

Amane. You don't have to worry about it; I can see all the best parts of you."

She was very close to him, and her voice was bright like the rays of the spring sun,

refreshing and clear. Her words slowly caressed his heart as she softly praised him.

The warmth and affection in her caramel-colored eyes took his breath away, as they

reflected him and him alone.

…I can't…

Amane felt a heat that he'd never experienced before. He couldn't so much as manage

a groan, or even to avert his eyes. He just stood there, basking in Mahiru's radiance.

Then, suddenly, Mahiru's smile changed to something much softer.

"You're adorable."

The moment he heard her sweetly whisper, a pleasant tingle ran up his spine, and the

warmth heating Amane's whole body grew even stronger under Mahiru's gaze.

Before he realized it, he had grasped her delicate fingers and taken them off his cheek,

and in a single, smooth movement, had pressed Mahiru against the back of the couch,

bringing his face very close to hers.

There was only a palm's breadth of distance between them.

Amane had kept his word, closing Mahiru's mouth shut with his hand against her lips

as he stared down at her.

The caramel-colored eyes peeking through long eyelashes that almost looked like a

hazy curtain were open wide in surprise.

That was close, Amane thought.

If she had looked at him with those eyes, if she had stirred him up any further, he might

have lost all restraint for a moment. If he didn't exert the small amount of self-control

he had in order to stop her, they both would have given up their first kiss.

As much as he would have liked to keep going and gradually chip away at those "firsts,"

Amane was brought back to reality by the urgent alarm bells of reason ringing in his

head. He was grateful that he had chosen a course of action that he wouldn't regret

later.

Mahiru, who had been calm and collected until a moment prior, stiffened when he

touched her lips, and a light crimson color spread over her cheeks in an instant.

Amane smirked when he saw that she hadn't gotten any better at dealing with sudden

surprises. Slowly, he lifted his hand from her lips.

They were still close enough that if he'd wiggled his fingers a little, they'd have

brushed her face, but instead of pulling back a little, he slowly put his lips near her ear

and whispered, "…If you say something like that again, I'll pull my hand away, and

really shut your mouth."

Though he couldn't see her face, Amane could feel Mahiru shudder.

However, she didn't push him away or try to block him. Feeling relieved, Amane

gradually backed away. He was suddenly embarrassed at how much he wanted to see

Mahiru's face, and he guiltily looked away.

In fact, he was already feeling intensely ashamed over his sudden, reckless boldness,

and he moved to rise from the sofa. He knew that he wasn't thinking straight, and that

what he needed was to get some actual, physical distance from her for a moment.

But when he started to stand, he felt some resistance. He looked down to where he felt

something pulling on him, then the next moment, a sweet smell filled his nose.

In the blink of an eye, threads of shimmering gold danced past him, and he felt

something soft graze one of his still-flushed cheeks.

Then he heard the sound of slippers on the floor and the echo of footsteps that were

wilder and more restless than they were nimble. Mahiru was gone, and it was like

everything he had just felt had been an illusion.

He recognized the bang of his front door slamming shut, and Amane brought his hand

to the cheek where something soft had touched it.

"—Why?" he mumbled, but naturally there was no answer.

Sapped of all energy, spirit, and composure, Amane sunk down into the sofa and stared

down the hallway where the flaxen whirlwind had disappeared.

Mahiru did not return to Amane's apartment for the rest of the day