My Life Now is Better Than Before

I'm left in tears as Ikuto storms out of the room. The hatred in his eyes, his harsh tone... he hates me. I didn't mean for any of this to happen! I came into this marriage not expecting a thing. Anything is better than life back in that household with Father and Ayato... but is it? Being close to him should be enough... but if he hates me, will it be alright?

Please Nini... please believe me. I didn't seduce you. You came into this room on your own. You poured your pheromones all over me. So why am I being punished?

I swallow hard and hold myself with a shudder. "..." I flinch hearing a knock on the door and see a maid peeking in. Her face is white as a sheet. Ikuto must have passed her on the way out. "U-um... would you like any help washing up?" My body freezes.

No one can know I'm a man! I shake my head quickly and keep myself covered. "N-no! I-I can do it myself." I stammer out. She nods and quickly shuts the door then leaves. I wait for a while before slowly getting up. My lower back aches but it's nothing I'm not already used to.

As I take a shower, I close my eyes thinking of the night before. He was so sweet... the alpha version of Ikuto. He treated me right... but was relentless. A blush forms on my cheeks and I shiver. That will never happen again. I'm just glad I didn't go into heat! With all those pheromones poured onto me, I'm sure I will soon though.

My heat cycle has never been regular and consistent. Father would always get me into heat so that I wouldn't fight him. I hate this body... I hate being an omega and a slave to the pheromones of alphas. It's never made me feel good... well until last night.

Ikuto is a strong, dominant alpha though. I'm sure anyone like me would feel the way I did. With him, I could tolerate it... but that's because I'll love him. Even if he hates me... I'm just happy to be close to him. If he abuses me... neglects me... life here will still be better than it was with Father.

If I do what he says, maybe he'll change his mind. I should be positive but I've never been a positive person. Life has dealt me a bad hand and I don't even know if my fate will be a happy one in the future.

I finish washing myself then come out drying my hair. I eye the tossed-aside nightgown. I'm sure it's wet or stained with my cum. I grimace a bit but take it to wash it out. What would any maid think seeing male fluids all over the insides of it? Would they suspect my gender?

I toss it into a basket for dirty clothes and change into a plain yellow dress. Seeing the bite marks makes me subconsciously touch the back of my neck. Luckily he didn't mark me. His breath had been heavy on it but he didn't bite down. Everywhere else though... how can I hide this? Maybe I should just stay in my room for a while.

I go over to the door and peek outside. No one is around and I hesitate before calling out. "Hello?" I wait for a moment and when no one answers my call, I sigh. I know I should eat since I fasted before the wedding due to nerves and being harassed by both of my family members, but I also just don't feel hungry.

I go back into my room and feel frustrated with myself. What should I do? I can't venture out like this and if Ikuto sees me, he'll be pissed at me. I think about what little clothes I have in this room then find a shawl. It's a little seethrough but it's better than nothing. I'll just go out and find the kitchen. I'll be able to get food that way without running into Ikuto or his wife.

I look around again before I start exploring. I just need to find the kitchen... how hard can it be? As I walk I'm surprised there is no one around. It's completely deserted... I guess because it's obvious Ikuto wants nothing to do with me? Still, they don't have to just avoid me. Luckily I'm used to doing things on my own so I won't be out of my element.

I slowly make my way down the hall and notice a half-open door. I peek inside and realize it's the dining hall. At the table are Ikuto and his wife both holding one of their baby. Seeing Ikuto's warm smile makes my heart ache. He'll never smile at me like that or love me that way. I'm nothing to him now.

I look away tears making my eyes burn. It's not fair but nothing has ever been fair for me. I quickly leave so that I don't bump into them. I see a few maids come out of a door with some trays then walk past me towards the dining hall. That must be the kitchen so I go inside. I look around before walking over to a fruit basket. An apple will do nicely for me. It's not something rich or big so it won't hurt my stomach.

I take a bite and chew before someone grabs my arm. I let out a gasp and nearly drop the apple. A chef is glowering at me. "What do you think you're doing?! Eating on the job! Why aren't you in your uniform?!" I blink dumbly at him before I'm shoved. "Get to work!" Does he think I'm a maid? I know my dress is plan but doesn't he know I'm the king's second wife?

"How useless can someone be?!" He grabs the apple in my hand and throws it away. "Don't make me tell the head maid what you've done! You're not being paid to stand around and steal food!" His voice is harsh and hateful. Is he having a bad day or is this just how he treats people?

"I-I'm sorry sir but I don't work here..." When he raises his hand, I pale and immediately shield my face. "What the hell is going on in here?!" I freeze. No... it's no way! Why is he here? I lower my arms and see Ikuto glaring darkly at us both. "You're just in time my king! This little rat here is slacking off and stealing food!"

I hold my breath as Ikuto storms over to us. Is he going to hit me? I take a step back and brace myself for fear overcoming my common sense but he goes past me. He grabs the chef by his collar and slams him against the wall as the chef lets out a startled gasp. The violence makes me flinch and just stare frozen in place.

"What did you just say?" Ikuto asks lowly. "That woman there is my second wife. Treat her with respect. If she wants to eat something in here, then let her eat. So you understand me?" His voice sounds dangerous which makes me tremble. I've never seen him so angry before and it triggers me.

The chef pales. "I-I'm sorry my king I... I didn't know." He stammers before Ikuto tosses him to the side. He then turns on me. "Why are you eating in here instead of in your room? I thought I told you not to appear in front of me ever again."

I suck in a shaky breath as my eyes meet his. They are icy blue right now meaning he isn't in control of his ice powers. "I-I..." I start to shiver from the cold goosebumps appearing all over. "I... t-there was no one around... I called and called so... I-I just decided to... to get my food." My voice is shaky as I stammer out my answer.

Ikuto pauses and frowns. "That's... valid..." he grumbles and eyes me up. The events of last night flashes in my mind making my face flush. Why did Ikuto have to be so handsome? His longish hair suits him too. He grabs me by my chin and I shiver from the cold. His hands are like ice. "I'll make sure you get your meals no matter what." He says after looking into my eyes and then lets me go.

I rub my chin. "T-thank you," I whisper and lower my eyes. I guess he wants me to stay in my room all the time. "Come on then." He sighs. "Come to the dining hall. My wife has left to do other tasks and errands." He glares at the chef again. "Make sure she gets a healthy and filling meal. If I find out you didn't follow my orders you will pay. Understood?" The chef gulps. "O-of course my king!"

With that, he grabs my arm and drags me away. I stumble after him and wonder why he's doing this. I'm fine in my room! He takes me to the dining hall and makes me sit down before he does the right across from me. He stares me down making me uncomfortable. What does he want from me? I shift and keep my eyes down while he continues to stare.

Soon maids come in and put several dishes in front of me. I can't eat all this! I look at Ikuto who is still watching me. "Eat." He orders. I frown and look down at the food. It's all too rich for me and it will make me sick. The only things I can eat are the fruit bowl and the potatoes so I start to nibble on them. The maids remain and they start to whisper about me.

"Maybe the king likes her?"

"No, I doubt it. I bet it's all for show."

"Who would like her anyway? She's nothing special."

"I bet the king feels sorry for her."

"I bet it's all for show so he can break her."

I swallow hard and look down feeling a lump in my throat. He doesn't care. I can tell by the look in his eyes that it's all an act. He probably wants me to put my guard down so he can tear me down. That's right Naki... don't fall for it. He's not the same Ikuto I know. He's someone different all together. His eyes are calculating as he watches me too. There's no way he'll ever love me... I merely want to create a false image of himself so that he can use or hurt me. I'm not stupid... but I fear I'll end up falling for his acting and then be crushed when he reveals his true colors.

Oh, Nini... I wish he remembered me and our promise... then maybe we could be friends instead of enemies. I love you Nini... so why do hate me so?