15

"Remember to keep moving. If it catches you, you're toast. Try to flank and strike at the hamstrings. Weaken it first before we go in for the kill. Got it?"

"Aroo!" Zeke says. Which is kobold for 'let's do this.' Fortunately, Ziggy speaks kobold... and every other language.

"Good," Ziggy says. "Let's kick this overgrown chihuahua's ass."

Zeke peels off to circle left, while Ziggy takes off to the right to draw its attention. This area of the Dungeon is about a fifteen-meter radius giving Ziggy plenty of room to wield his weapon and keep the mangy uberfloof at a distance. However, the kobold has other ideas and turns away from Ziggy to charge after Zeke.

"Shit!" Ziggy snarls. He'd gotten complacent with how predictable the monsters he faced so far were. Most monsters will go after adventurers instinctively, and Ziggy never considered that Irregulars might have different priorities. "Zeke, dodge him."

Zeke backpedals as the Irregular charges at him with shocking speed. The giant monster leaps, and Zeke barely manages to tumble out of the way as oversized claws glowing with blood-red energy smash down on the spot where Zeke had just been. The attack is strong enough to kick up rock fragments from the Dungeon floor.

A backhand slap follows the monster's first attack and sends Zeke sailing and skidding to a stop. Ziggy charges forward to take some pressure off Zeke, stabbing his weapon at the Irregular's exposed back, but the beast whirls and bats the attack away contemptuously.

Expecting the counter, Ziggy uses the momentum to spin the weapon around and catch the monster with a shallow slash across the chest. The Irregular leaps back and growls, dropping into a crouch as the blood drips onto the ground.

"Do I have your attention now, bitch?" Ziggy taunts. The beast snarls, exposing the elongated canine fangs. Zeke is big for a kobold, a bit over a meter and a half, but the Irregular has more than twice Zeke's mass and would be even taller than Ziggy if he stood fully upright, with long gangly arms giving him a significant reach with the razor-like claws. There is also that blood-red energy that gives Ziggy a bad feeling.

The Irregular's haunches flex, launching forward with a flurry of red-trailing slashes. Ziggy reading the attack, stabs out his blade as he backpedals to maintain some distance. Ziggy leads the monster around the room, matching its furious pace with quick jabs. Shallow wounds open up on the beast's arms, but despite this, Ziggy can't get a good bead on a vital strike.

The Irregular is just intelligent enough to protect its most vulnerable bits. It tries grabbing Ziggy's weapon, but Ziggy twists the blade and digs the spike deeper into its flesh. Its blood on the haft makes getting a grip difficult.

Suddenly, Ziggy drops into a crouch, bracing the guandao against the floor of the Dungeon, as the Irregular begins a new charging assault. The Irregular's eyes widen, seeing the sudden shift as a trap, and it tries to pull back its momentum. However, the beast forgot one thing.

Zeke's weight slams into the back of the Irregular, forcing the monster forward and impaling it on Ziggy's guandao, but missing the beast's heart as it twists to avoid the blade. Zeke's claws find purchase in the Irregular's hide, and he tears and bites at its neck and shoulder.

The Irregular goes berserk and twists and jerks away, tearing the guandao from Ziggy's grip. The beast throws itself on the ground, crushing Zeke under it, but the plucky little kobold hangs on, worrying at the Irregular's thick hide like a favorite chew toy. The Irregular thrashes around, trying to shake Zeke from his back, and eventually, the haft of the guandao snaps.

Tsk. "Dammit, I liked that weapon," Ziggy says, pulling the kukris from their sheathes. "Well, there goes my reach advantage."

Ziggy circles the rampaging Irregular looking for an opening to finish the job, but he is wary of getting too close and catching an unlucky claw. Finally, Zeke crawls too high up on the Irregular and gets caught by one of the oversized paws. Zeke yelps as the claws dig in, and the beast uses that small opening to rip Zeke from its back and slam him into the ground with bone-crushing power.

Zeke hits the ground so hard he bounces, but as the Irregular reaches back to slash down onto the prone kobold, Ziggy dashes forward, slashing a kukri into its flank, tearing an enraged howl from the beast's throat. Ziggy tries to leap back but still catches a claw across the chest that rips his armor and sends several kunai clattering to the ground.

Ziggy is sent reeling by the attack and barely manages to stay on his feet. Stumbling to a stop, Ziggy looks at the battered and bloody beast in front of him, a quarter of the guandao sticking out from the right side of its chest, tattered flesh from its arms dripping blood into pools at its feet. That doesn't even cover the mess that Zeke made to its back and shoulders, nor the deep slash Ziggy made to its flank.

"Fucker would have bled out by now if it was a normal creature," Ziggy grouses.

Seemingly in response, the Irregular reaches up to the remnant of Ziggy's guandao and tears the blade from its chest with a savage roar. The monster holds the weapon up and then looks at Ziggy as if challenging him.

Ziggy's eyebrow raises. 'Does this mother fucker want to fight me with my own weapon?' he wonders, but not for long as the Irregular releases a pained howl as the heavily injured Zeke slams into the back of its leg and drives a kunai deep behind the knee.

The Irregular teeters, and Ziggy sees his chance. Charging forward, he leaps high onto the distracted monster's chest, stabbing his off-hand kukri deep into the muscle, severing the ligaments and tendons between the chest and arm and driving the beast to the ground.

Releasing the off-hand kukri, he uses that hand to drive the muzzle of the Irregular up and away, exposing the beast's throat. Ziggy reverses the grip on the other kukri and savagely stabs down into the monster's neck and chest as it tries to thrash and throw Ziggy free, but next to him is Zeke riding the monster's one good arm with his fangs shredding the muscle and tearing the flesh.

The phlegmy yowls of the Irregular cut off as the kukri severs the throat, and blood gushes, spraying Ziggy's chest and body and spattering over his face. Still, he hacks and stabs as fast and hard as possible, driving the blade through the beast and into the ground beneath. Ziggy has one rule about these monsters. Until they burst into dust, they aren't dead enough.

A moment later, that same event comes to pass, and Zeke and Ziggy fall to the ground through a cloud of red dust. The kukris clatter to the ground, and Ziggy takes a long breath. Looking to the side, he sees the prone form of Zeke lying next to him.

One of Zeke's arms is twisted in an obviously broken way, and his fur is matted with blood. His breathing is ragged, and his tongue is lolling out the side of his muzzle. Ziggy frowns. "Zeke, you like shit."

Zeke grumbles in what translates to, "Gee, I wonder why? You're welcome, by the way."

Ziggy laughs and then winces. "Yeah, thanks. You did good," he says. "I wasn't kidding, though; you do look like shit. You should go back and rest."

A little more grumbling from the kobold.

"Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I can still call Ein out if I need some backup."

More growling.

Pfft. "I'll tell Ein you said that," Ziggy responds with a laugh. He waves his hand, and a magic circle appears below Zeke. "Now, go on. Rest up."

Pushing himself to his feet, Ziggy surveys the area before picking up his weapons and spoils, a three-inch-long claw and a tennis ball-sized crystal with swirling red energy. Putting the crystal in his bag, he pats the side. "Not bad," he says. "Welcome to the family, buddy."

Picking up the remains of his guandao, Ziggy sighs. "I liked this weapon. Maybe I can put a new haft on it, and it'll be good to go."

As he's staring at the two pieces, he hears Lili's voice. "It's just down this way!" she yells, and the sound of many feet echoes down the corridor.

Ziggy stretches his sore body. "Well, looks like company's coming."

He winces as the bruise where the Irregular hit his armor becomes more tender as the adrenaline wears off. He looks toward the entrance as five people rush inside. Ziggy's eyes widen when he sees them, recognizing them immediately.

"Where's the monster," a hyperexcited girl carrying an oversized scythe with a blade nearly as long as she is tall yells. Her dark hair with red highlights is cut just long enough for the bangs to occasionally cover up her silver eyes that oddly scream both innocent and battle junkie.

The three others besides Lili that follow her into the room are also instantly recognizable.

The pale snowy-haired girl with the thin scar over her eye, rapier in hand, and the demeanor that screams 'I am a princess,' the sullen dark-haired catgirl that looks like she should be reading Poe while wearing a beret but secretly reads trashy romance novels, and finally the busty golden-haired bruiser, wearing spiked gauntlets and spoiling for a fight.

Ziggy blinked at the sight. After seeing Velvet at the lingerie shop, he knew they were in this world, thanks to the ROBs, but it was a whole different story knowing something and seeing it firsthand. The girls from RWBY really were here.

"Excuse me," the plucky girl with the giant-sized farm implement says. "Have you seen a big ugly monster somewhere around here?"

Ziggy smiles. "You just missed it."

"Oh, no," she says with a sad pout. "Well, which way did it go?"

Ziggy finds himself stuck between a frown and a smirk. "Well, it sort of shuffled off its mortal coil."

"Huh?"

Sigh. "He's saying it's dead, you airhead," the princess says.

"Oh," she says. "Then why didn't he just say that?"

Ziggy shakes his head. "You're right. I tried being funny, and it just didn't work."

"Ziggy!" Lili says, running into the room. "You're alive!?"

Lili stops herself from launching herself at him, and a part of her brain balks at the idea that she considered doing so in the first place. 'What am I thinking? I just met him. So what if he has a pretty face. I hardly know anything about him other than that he's already drowning in women. Not that I'd be interested in that anyway.'

She shakes those thoughts out and looks back up at Ziggy. "What happened? I've only been gone like ten minutes."

"Yeah, I'm impressed you got back so soon," Ziggy says. "I was about to head back up, myself."

"Wait," the emo catgirl says. "Your name is Ziggy? Are you from the Xuannu Familia?"

He nods. "That's right. And you are?"

"Oh, we're from the Cainu Familia. I'm Ruby; that's my sister Yang with blond hair, this is Weiss, and the one that asked if you were from the Xuannu Familia is Blake. It's nice to meet you," Ruby says with a cheerful smile.

"Oh yeah," Yang says, drawing out the sounds like she just thought of something. "You do that morning exercise thing, right?"

"Yep. Morning Yoga and exercise. It's a good way to start the day and keeps your mind in tune with your body."

"So I've heard," she says. "I hear even the Sword Princess comes?"

"Oh, yeah, Ais is testing it out to see how it affects her growth and development," Ziggy says. "So far, the results are good, but I'm still concerned that at her level, she could be under the illusion of the placebo effect."

"Um. A what now?" Ruby asks.

"A placebo effect. It's where something isn't really affecting you, but you believe so hard that it is that you still see the desired results," Ziggy says.

"How is something like that possible?" Yang says.

Ziggy shrugs. "The mind is a strange and wondrous thing. People often underestimate exactly how much control it has over our well-being. Let's face it, it is our mind that allows us to bend the laws of the universe and cast magic, isn't it? And the gods can do even more than that. What's a little extra muscle tone compared to those miracles?"

She smirks. "I guess that makes sense. Maybe I'll join your exercise group. How about it? Will you help me work up a sweat?" she asks, dripping innuendo.

Ziggy turns to the tease. "I'd be happy to run you through the paces and work your body hard. By the time I'm done, you'll be absolutely drenched..." he says with a knowing smirk. "In sweat."

Weiss frowns, not liking the open sexual overtones of the conversation. "Can we please be serious here?" she says.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Yang. You weren't being serious?" Ziggy asks, blinking in mock confusion.

Yang smirks. "I have no idea what Weiss is talking about; I was being completely serious. I think a good workout would do wonders for our training."

Tsk. Weiss frowns and turns away from them.

"Alright," Blake says with a dry tone. "Could we maybe stop teasing Weiss and focus on what happened here?"

Yang shrugs, and Ziggy just smiles at the catgirl. "Of course. However, I was perfectly serious about the morning exercise if any of you are interested."

'And the evening exercise as well,' he thought with lewd intent.

"So, what happened here?" Ruby asks. "Lili here says that an Irregular was coming, and you stayed behind to hold it off until reinforcements could arrive."

Ziggy nods. "Yeah, that's about the short and skinny of it."

"So, how did you beat it?" Yang asks.

"With a little effort," Ziggy says, shaking his head.

"Oh, come on! Was it really an Irregular? They're supposed to be super strong, and I know you're brand new. There's no way you should be able to take it down," she says.

"We're only on the third floor. What are you expecting? A Goliath?" Ziggy asks incredulously. "It was just a bigger, tougher, and smarter version of a kobold. If I had to guess, its stats were probably in the C or B range, tops.

Maybe it was at the level of something on the tenth or eleventh floors, but with some care and using my brain, it wasn't that terrible. I wouldn't want to fight them regularly yet, but a level two would have spanked it in a couple of seconds."

"There are adventurers who take months, sometimes more than a year, to make it to the tenth floor. The monsters there would destroy most new adventurers in a second, and you're telling me that this thing was on par with those, and you defeated it without a scratch? I don't buy it," Weiss says.

Ziggy holds out his hands. "Hey, now. I got scratched. Look," he says, pointing at the damage to his chest armor. "I got too close after it broke my guandao. See?"

"Come to think of it," Lili says. "Ziggy was effortlessly slaughtering monsters at will on our way down here. I'm not sure how much stronger the Irregular was, but I'm not sure I'm surprised anymore that Ziggy could beat it."

Ziggy smiles. "Thanks, Lili."

The distant sound of a CRACK catches all their attention. Ziggy steps over to Lili. "Lili, I think I'll go with the sword and shield combo for now."

"Oh, hey," Ruby says, perking up. "Some of our other teammates use a sword and shield, but I thought you used that other thingy. Why not just bring a backup one of those?"

"Well," Ziggy says, hefting the shield and getting accustomed to the weight. "I originally came here just for some combat practice with a few different styles to see which ones I preferred. I used the guandao against the Irregular to keep some distance. I would have gone with this combination if I didn't think it would be significantly stronger than me."

"That makes a certain amount of sense, but isn't it going to be difficult to carry around a lot of different weapons in the future?" Blake says.

"Well, like I said, I want to narrow down my choices," Ziggy says, shrugging. "The problem is that pretty much every weapon combination feels good."

'That must be his Skill helping him to understand the weapons,' Lili thinks.

"Too bad your weapon couldn't transform into another when you needed it too," Ruby says, gesticulating the use of different weapons. "Then you could be like, BAM, WHAP, TWANG, and then stab."

Weiss performs a quintessential facepalm, and Ruby's other two roommates shake their heads with knowing smiles.

"You've been talking about that forever. Give it up, sis. You aren't going to find a smith to even attempt that," Yang says.

"Well, then, she's just going to have to do it herself. Right?" Ziggy says.

The five women stare at Ziggy until an excited smile blooms on Ruby's face. "Do you really think I can?" she says.

"I don't see why not," Ziggy says, but as he's about to say more, a screech echoes through several of the adjoining corridors. "Well, it looks like the Dungeon got sick of our lollygagging."

Lili coughs.

"Lili, if you could keep an eye on the hall behind us so we don't get boxed in," Ziggy says as monsters from the other three corridors rush out. Ziggy sees a few Dungeon lizards walking along the walls and ceilings.

"Ladies, do any of you have any ranged weapons?" he says, punching a goblin in the face with the edge of his shield, cracking its skull.

"Weiss," Ruby says. "They're yours."

Weiss rolls her eyes and leaps into the air as a silvery rune appears, and she lands on it. More appear in front of her, and she starts running up towards the lizards trying to flank the group.

"That's a neat trick," Ziggy says. "Is that quick cast magic?"

"Nope," Yang says, crushing a kobold's face with a brutal right cross. "Believe it or not, that's her Skill. Runs in her family along with her white hair."

Weiss slashes her rapier through the tongue of a lizard that tries to stop her and leaps forward to stab it through the eye, causing it to burst into dust.

The Dungeon was apparently unhappy because the monsters kept coming; even after more than two dozen monsters stormed the room, there were more. Eventually, monsters started coming from the other corridor that Lili was watching.

"Ziggy!" she shouts, and Ziggy glances over his shoulder to see three goblins rushing through the door.

"Shit!" Ziggy shouts. "Ein! Protect Lili."

A glowing magic circle appears behind him, and Ziggy's second kobold summon leaps forward over Lili and crashes into the goblins. A monster's sudden appearance in the middle of the group has the expected reaction of freaking everyone else out, except for Weiss, who, after seeing it shouts, "It's like my sister's spell. It's on our side."

After several minutes the rush of monsters slows, and Ziggy notices that the others are starting to tire. "I think we've had enough fun for one day," he says, just as Weiss misses her timing and falls from one of her glyphs. Yang manages to catch her before she hits the ground.

Weiss is breathing hard, and her eyes have a glazed look. "I'm just about tapped out," she says.

"Yeah, time for a tactical withdrawal," Ziggy says. "Hey, Ruby. Do you want to take point with Ein and lead us out of here? I'll take the rear guard if Miss Blake wouldn't mind helping me out a little."

Blake nods and starts slowly backing her way toward Ziggy.

"What about me?" Yang says, still supporting Weiss.

"You rescued the princess," Ziggy says with a smile. "You have to take responsibility for her. Stay in the middle with Lili and help Weiss. Keep alert in case the Dungeon pulls some shit."

Tsk.

"On three, Ein and Ruby rush the exit and clear us a path. Lili, Yang, and Weiss stay close but leave them enough room to fight. Move quickly, so Blake and I can plug the hole before anyone mobs sneak in between us. Ready?" They nod. "Three!"

Ruby kicks back and slashes through three kobolds in front of Ein, and he dives under the blade to tackle a goblin just under the arc of the scythe's swing. Everyone rushes back toward the entrance to the second floor.

.

.

.

Ruby plops down on the floor outside the entrance of the Dungeon. "That... huff... was awesome," she says with a smile.

Pfft. "I wouldn't say awesome," Ziggy says with a snort. "We did leave behind something like fifty crystals on the third floor."

He looks over at the silver-haired girl leaning against the wall. "How are you feeling, Miss Weiss?"

"A bit better, thank you," she says stiffly. "I have no idea how you maintain your summons so long. You must have an outrageous Magic stat."

Ziggy smiles. "Believe it or not, there isn't much upkeep on it once summoned."

"I'm guessing that is how you were able to defeat the Irregular," Blake says.

Ziggy nods. "I had my other summons, Zeke, harry it while I poked at it to keep it at a distance. Well, that was the plan anyway. The prick threw that to the side when he started after Zeke first thing, and I ended up trying to pull it off him."

"I can't believe the Dungeon threw a Monster Surge at us immediately after an Irregular," Lili says.

"Nah," Ziggy says. "I don't think that was a Monster Surge. Not enough monsters to truly overwhelm us, and monsters didn't start coming from our back until a few minutes into the fight. We could have left earlier if we wanted."

"So, what do you think it was then?" Blake asks.

"I think the Dungeon was trying to kill or drive the Irregular out," Ziggy says. "I think the Dungeon isn't fond of things that break its order. Whether that's adventurers or monsters that get too big for their britches."

"That's an interesting theory," Weiss says. Everyone is a little quiet and just rests for a few minutes.

"Hey, Ziggy?" Ruby says slowly.

"Hmm?"

"Do you really think I can make the transforming weapons?" she asks.

"Sure," he says. "Are you wondering how to go about it?"

She nods emphatically.

"Do you have anyone in your Familia that is a blacksmith or maybe an item crafter?" he asks.

"Hmm..." Ruby hums as she tries to remember.

"Captain Goodwitch is able to create items," Blake says.

"And Miss Laminitus in the Sunu Familia made my weapon after my previous one broke," Weiss says.

Ziggy didn't recognize the second name, but that first one certainly piqued his curiosity. He shakes it off and refocuses on Ruby's question. "Well, I'd talk to your goddess and see if she can get Miss Laminitus to teach you the basics of blacksmithing and then talk to Captain Goodwitch about item crafting. You're going to need both to make what you want.

Maybe if you really focus on it, you'll develop a Skill or Development Ability through your Falna to help facilitate your dream. Beyond that, you'll have to experiment. It's going to be a lot of work and studying."

Ruby deflates a little. "I'm not all that great at studying," she says.

"Just remember that all the studying you do is to make the weapons you really want," he says. "It'll pay off, and you can always come to me if you need help with something. Whether it's to bounce ideas off or test some crazy weapon, it sounds fun. Just remember to give me a discount when you're a famous weapon designer."

"Ooo, Weapon Designer. That sounds so cool!" She says, her energy and excitement cranked back up to eleven.

"Ut oh. You did it now," Yang says. "She's going to be on you like stink on a goblin."

"I can think of worse things than a cute girl craving my attention," Ziggy says with a wink.

Weiss rolls her eyes. "Come on. We have to report the Irregular to the Guild."

The group pushes their tired bodies to their feet and begins the trudge toward the Guild.

'I hope Rose isn't too upset about me taking on an Irregular,' he thinks. 'I'm going to have to have a talk with her eventually.' Sigh.