Day 0000 hour 04 - The letter

I sat there in the quiet in a trance from the reality of the world. It was not easy for a person like myself in a world that shunned my societal class. Hope had dried up a couple of years after the death of my family and desire sank in when I realized the lack of information I had about my family. I did not know my father's family nor did he ever speak about it. Whenever he was around, I had a feeling that he wanted to build memories about us rather than speak about something in his past or his current relationships.

My mother was no better than him. She outright denied that she had any living relatives remaining in this world. She did mention something about running away due to a war that engulfed them all before escaping. So as I examined the empty space before me, the stained paper in my hands brought me back from the self inflicted hypnosis.

I unfolded the paper that was now about half my age but deteriorating faster than me. The gentleness, in my handling of it, was not to damage it more than it already is. I could have easily transcribed it elsewhere but I could not bring myself to. Plus, I was too poor to afford the maintenance cost of a reliable phone or computer. So between my vanity and financial instability, I had no options but to handle it with care and keep it close.

"14 down and 22 more to go." I was mummering to myself as air was released from lungs to form a sigh. I drew a line through my 14th attempt at success. This attempt took more time than all of the rest before it. The background noise was probably the only constant in my life so it was normal to have the ability to drown it out. So it did not distract me when I went to read the next item on the list.

From an outsiders perspective, it would seem that I gave up easily but I can assure everyone that I gave all of my ideas a fair shot. Some were easier to dismiss than others since they were thought up by a child that had no idea how the laws of the world worked.

For example, ideas 3 and 7 were the definition of a fairytale plan. Idea 3 would have me catch a flying star and sell it to buy equipment to catch more of them while idea 7 was to learn to fly. Then I would use my new ability of flight to save people and ask them to pay me for my services. I giggle every time I remember the attempts at actually making them a reality.

This was the real world where reality clashes with dreams too big for the deprived members of society. But it did not mean that it was impossible. They were just not within my grasp to accomplish anytime soon. I would have to wait for the right moment to pounce on those ideas.

Then there was idea 13. This was the second most shameful plan I had. I do not even want to talk about the one that entered first place. So this idea had me ask everyone around me for one dollar. If I did that one thousand times a day, I predicted that a ten percent success rate was not impossible. But what I did not account for was the probability of meeting the same person multiple times a week and being known as a beggar within the town and neighbouring neighborhoods. I could have ventured out further but most places already had a syndicate of beggars ready to defend their turf with their lives. It was too dangerous.

And what was even sadder was that the rich always got away with begging on larger scales because they already had money. They would only have to ask behind the mask of charity. So it was not only dangerous for me to try but it was also not a scalable business plan and not to mention the fact that it was out of my league to begin with. So that idea was trashed after a couple weeks of attempting to make something plausible.

My last idea was not too bad and more practical than the rest so far. I would go through the many trash ridden areas and look for things to use in building furniture. For the past four months I have created two chairs and a small table. The last chair was sold yesterday but it was bought from me to be destroyed again. I did not have the skills to make proper items and the money I was using in acquiring the materials were slightly less expensive than the sold price. When I included rent, food and small necessities, I found that I would be in the negative every month. Hence my negative bank balance.

As I stared at the 15th idea, an envelope slid under my door into my room. It was a normal white envelope and this was how the landlord communicated with his tennents. I put my paper down and moved to pick it up. I only wished that it was not bad news.

I wouldn't normally read who it was addressed to but this time it was a little strange. The landlord would write the apartment number on the front but this time it had four letters on there instead.

NEMI

It was not my apartment number but my name. There was one other person with that name in the community so there was a chance that it could have not been for me. On the other hand, it could have reached the person it was meant for.

As I thought of the ramifications of being wrong, my fingers moved to open it without hesitation.