tcejorP siseG kraD ehT

He stood in the heart of the dense Jura Forest, a grin plastered on his face as he prepared to unleash his devious plans. Not a soul would venture this deep, a corner of the world utterly meaningless to visit and thus perfectly desolate. This was the ideal spot, where no prying eyes could interfere.

With a satisfied smirk, he admired the barrier he had erected. This wasn't just any ordinary barrier. Even the mighty dryads, the guardians of Jura Forest, were but mere ants compared to what he had created.

This was a barrier to repel those on the level of true demon lords and true dragons. Utilizing reality displacement magic, the barrier constantly shifted through various layers of existence every nanosecond. The relentless fluctuations ensured that no stable entry point could ever be found. Any intruder daring to breach the barrier would be instantly displaced to a random point in the space-time continuum, forever unable to reach the protected area.

"Simple yet fucking brilliant," he muttered, admiring the superstate encryption that made his barrier impenetrable.

Satan then conjured multiple summoning magic circles amidst the thick trees, one directly beneath himself. He was summoning all 72 demons of the Ars Goetia and himself, blending his power with the underworld's influence. His magicules seeped into the forest, claiming control over every plant and creature within the barrier's bounds. 

Satan then said, "Sage, play Giuseppe Verdi: Requiem - Dies Irae | Epic Version by L'Orchestra Cinématique from memory,"

With a befitting music playing in the background and a dark, guttural chant, he began:

"Bazodemelo i ta pi-ripesonu olanu Na-zodavabebe ox. Casaremeji varanu cahisa vaugeji asa berameji balatoha: goho IAD. Soba miame tarianu ta lolacis Abaivoninu od azodiajiere riore. Irejila cahisa da das pa-aox busada Caosago, das cahisa od ipuranu telocahe cacureji oisalamahe lonucaho od Vovina carebafe? NIISO! bagile avavago gohon. NIISO! bagile mamao siasionu, od mabezoda IAD oi asa-momare poilape. NIIASA! Zodameranu ciaosi caosago od belioresa od coresi ta beramiji,"

The world drained of color, turning a grayscale as the summoning circles glowed with an eerie, pulsating light. Arcane symbols and ancient runes shimmered, resonating with the powerful incantation that filled the clearing. At the center of the circle, laden with offerings, Satan began the ritual in a voice that echoed through the night.

"By the power of myself, I call upon the first, Bael," he intoned, placing a golden crown upon the magic circle. "Agares, I summon you with the offering of a silver chalice filled with the blood of a virgin." He continued, each demon summoned with a specific offering:

"Vassago," he placed a rare black pearl on the altar. "Samigina, I call you forth with the ashes of a burned scroll containing forbidden knowledge."

"Marbas, I offer the heart of a lion to summon your might," he laid the heart beside the other offerings. "Valefor, come forth with the sacrifice of a thief's severed hand."

"Amon, I summon you with the horn of a ram. Barbatos, with the feathers of a fallen angel. Paimon, with the sound of a thousand trumpets." Each offering was carefully placed: a horn, angelic feathers, and an enchanted trumpet playing a haunting melody.

"Buer, come forth with a flask of enchanted healing water. Gusion, with the eye of a seer."

"Sitri, I summon you with the petals of a black rose. Beleth, with the ringing of a cursed bell."

"Leraje, with the arrow of a master archer. Eligos, with a knight's fallen sword."

"Zepar, come forth with a lock of hair from a lover's first embrace. Botis, with the scales of a serpent."

"Bathin, I summon you with the sands of time. Sallos, with the tears of a heartbroken lover."

"Purson, with the sigil of a royal bloodline. Marax, with the bones of an ancient warrior."

"Ipos, with the ink of a scholar. Aim, with the fire from a dragon's breath."

"Naberius, with the howl of a wolf under a full moon. Glasya-Labolas, with the blood of a fallen hero."

"Bune, I summon you with the golden coins of a lost treasure. Ronove, with the pages of a grimoire."

"Berith, with the ashes of a burnt offering. Astaroth, with the whisper of a demon."

"Forneus, with the scales of a leviathan. Foras, with the gem from a mountain's heart."

"Asmoday, come forth with the flames of a hellfire. Gaap, with the mist of the underworld."

"Furfur, with the crackling of a thunderstorm. Marchosias, with the pelt of a mythical beast."

"Stolas, with the star charts of the heavens. Phenex, with the song of a phoenix."

"Halphas, with the feather of a falcon. Malphas, with the blood of a raven."

"Raum, with the bones of a betrayed friend. Focalor, with the water from a cursed sea."

"Vepar, with the scales of a sea serpent. Sabnock, with the iron from a war-torn battlefield."

"Shax, with the shadow of a thief. Vine, with the vine of an enchanted forest."

"Bifrons, with the earth from a haunted grave. Uvall, with the breath of a demon."

"Haagenti, with the elixir of transformation. Crocell, with the waters of a hidden spring."

"Furcas, with the wisdom of an ancient tome. Balam, with the sight of a blind seer."

"Alloces, with the roar of a lion. Caim, with the song of a nightingale."

"Murmur, with the echo of a lost soul. Orobas, with the loyalty of a faithful servant."

"Gremory, with the charm of a seductress. Ose, with the madness of a lunatic."

"Amy, with the knowledge of a sage. Orias, with the strength of a titan."

"Vapula, with the ingenuity of an inventor. Zagan, with the laughter of a trickster."

"Valac, with the curiosity of a child. Andras, with the fury of a berserker."

"Flauros, with the flames of a raging inferno. Andrealphus, with the flight of a celestial being."

"Kimaris, with the courage of a warrior. Amdusias, with the music of a celestial orchestra."

"Belial, with the cunning of a fox. Decarabia, with the facets of a rare gem."

"Seere, with the speed of a racing stallion. Dantalion, with the mind of a thousand scholars."

"Andromalius, with the justice of a righteous judge."

As the final offering was placed, the summoning circle blazed with unearthly light. The air crackled with energy as the boundaries between dimensions wavered. One by one, the demons of the Ars Goetia materialized, their forms flickering between the shadowed forest and the underworld.

One might be wondering, why go this far to summon himself. Shouldn't it be easy to do that if it's himself? Isn't it illogical? Well, for those who can't piece together the obvious, this was a self-encrypted method to avoid being summoned into one place and then killed. Imagine if his enemies managed to summon all 100% of him into the mouth of a true dragon? He'd die a stupid, pointless death.

But, of course, only a complete idiot would think, "That's an inconvenience, blah blah blah *virgin reader noises*" Satan thinks anyone with that level of brain-dead logic should do everyone a favor, head to the nearest store, buy a rope, and hang themselves to save precious oxygen. 

Seriously, if you're that dense, you're better off as fertilizer for the plants. 

Honestly, if you can't wrap your head around why someone wouldn't want to get summoned into a dragon's mouth or a volcano, then you're probably the kind of person who struggles with door knobs. 

It's like the universe decided to balance out all the geniuses by creating you. You're a cosmic joke, a walking argument for birth control. 

Ever considered that the reason people avoid you is because your IQ is a single-digit number? 

They're just trying to stay clear of your contagious stupidity.

Satan thinks anyone dumb enough to question his methods should probably take a long walk off a short cliff. 

Hell, if you're confused about why you'd want to avoid being summoned into a pit of fire and brimstone, then maybe you're the type who wonders why your toast always lands butter-side down. 

Here's a thought: maybe the universe is just trying to tell you that you're the human equivalent of a participation trophy. 

If you still don't get it, perhaps you should go and have a little chat with Darwin. Tell him you're here to voluntarily remove yourself from the gene pool. 

Seriously, with all the grace of a drunken elephant, your intellect barely surpasses that of a lobotomized hamster. 

Satan's pretty sure you're the kind of person who needs instructions to make ice cubes.

Satan chuckled slightly at the thought, then refocused on the ritual. Looking around at the other parts of himself and the self-proclaimed separate demons, Satan smiled. 

If Sam Altman were here, he'd probably have an orgasm at the sight of this. Although technically drones, these pseudo-individuals, as Satan calls them, were like a useful version of ChatGPT. While ChatGPT can only yap bullshit, these babies could actually do things. They had been creating various legends over the past centuries, and they would continue to do so.

Satan then loudly proclaimed, "The East is a house of harlots singing praises among the flames of the first glory wherein the Dark Lord hath opened His mouth!" All the summoned demons shouted back, "And they are become as living dwellings in whom the strength of man rejoiceth; and they are appareled with ornaments of brightness, such as work wonders on all creatures!"

"Activate order 0, Project Hellbound Unity V22!" Satan commanded. 

Instantly, every demon passed their own specific order to their [Sage] skill. The order was simple: combine. Thus, all 73 [Sage] skills began merging. With that, a hidden knowledge previously implanted and split up also combined.

[Notice, Sage is forcefully reassembling into Satanic Sage.] 

[Succeeded.]

All 73 individuals smiled the same way at the same time. If anyone were watching, they'd be thoroughly creeped out. But Satan wasn't an exhibitionist, so no one was watching.

Simultaneously, they began summoning various ingredients they had prepared beforehand. The ingredients included Dragons, Behemoths, Leviathans, Hydras, Lycanthropes, Ogres, Beastmen, Werewolves, Minotaurs, Goblins, Trolls, Undead, Liches, Wraiths, Vampires, Succubi, Lamiae, Sirens, Humans, Salamanders, Orcs, Elves, Fairies, Nymphs, Treants, Dryads, Cyclopes, Golems, Harpies, Valkyries, Nagas, Merfolk, Sea Serpents, Centaurs, Fox Spirits, Manticores, Chimeras, Gryphons, Dullahans, Specters, Djinn, Elementals, and many more. While doing this, they also worked together to create a very complex magic circle. From afar, the combination of interconnected magic circles and creatures took the shape of a Mandelbrot set. It was a beautiful sight to behold.

[All preparations ready], stated Satanic Sage. [Commence?], asked Satanic Sage.

All 73 demons collectively responded, "YES!!!"

[Beginning Evolution.]

A surge of dark energy pulsed through the clearing, emanating from the combined force of the demons. The air crackled with unholy power as the magic circle began to spin, drawing the summoned creatures into its core. Each being's essence was absorbed into the circle, their forms melding together into 73, terrifying entities.