C85 I'd Tap That Ass...

(Suffient Nanites acquired)

(Begging host's bodies restoration)

(Host body restored to 100 percent)

(Warning!Warning!Warning! Detected multiple augmentations)

(Running diagnosis)

(Diagnosis completed)

(Begining host body's optimization based on secondary operational protocols)

(Detected redundant artificially created organ, removing the bioengineered cells responsible for coagulation and scabbing together with the artificially Implanted organ)

(Detected surgical augmentations In the brain)

(Calculating, all brains surgical augmentations had been deemed useful for Increasing combat effectiveness)

(Detected surgical sterilization)

(Warning!Warning!Warning! Detected indirect breach of Milky Ways Federations founding species know as homo evolutis preservation and mandatory war efforts laws, article 1, section 2, paragraph 3, all homo evolutis citizens are required by law to produce an offspring once a year once they reach the age of 18 until they're physical condition doesn't allow them to.)

(Regenerating surgically disabled parts responsible for fertilization of hosts s*rm)

...

Just as the reanimate orc war chief was about to smash seargent Mirovs who was covered In grosteque wounds from head to toe head Into meat paste with his power hammer.

The corpse collapsed to the ground like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

For a second seargent Mirov continued to lay on the ground while looking at the corpse expecting It to spring to Its feet the next one.

Only to hear his battle brothers confused comments reverberate through the battlefield In which the forces of the living and the dead duked It out just moments ago.

"Are they dead for good this time or what?"

One of the cosmic marines asked out loud as he emptied the last rounds in his smart assault rifles mag at the corpse that left a deep gauge In his neck.

"I say we slice them up and Incinerate the pieces for good measure"

A death marine whose chest armor plates had been practically torn open commented as he started doing just that, the man got down on his armored knees and started slicing and dicing the corpse Into pieces with his laser edged combat knife.

"Hotel Quebec this is delta mike..."

Seargent Mirov began as he stood up with difficulty while scanning the battlefield.

...

The Fenrir's den was deathly silent to the point that you could hear the sound of a needle hitting the floor.

As every officer, NCO and soldier stared at death marines and seargent Jagers cosmic marines squads helmets visors live holographic video feeds.

Practically everyone had the same thought in their minds.

First a space anomaly out of nowhere, then EMP, followed by orcs straight out from a fantasy book, a f*cking space vampire necromancer that literally s*xually violated their Imperator, and unkillable zombies that dropped dead all of a sudden, what the f*CK the was going on?

At this point, they wouldn't be surprised If literal g*ds started appearing like mushrooms after rain.

Even the take off requests for dropships pilots that were fully loaded with cosmic marines waiting on Nova Romas airbases tarmac went unanswered.

"XO just give the order and my men will Incinerate the corpses and the xeno b*tch"

Hans suggested already holding his finger over the holographic transmission button.

"Absolutely not! Those corpses and the xeno female could advance our Imperium by years!"

Captain Frank vetoed at once his eyes sparkling with scientific curiosity.

"I'll have to side with captain Frank on this one XO, as we all saw the moment the xeno female kissed our Imperator his wounds started healing at naked eye visible speed"

"Now I'm not sure If this can be explained by science or if Is this straight In the supernatural category"

"But the fact remains that we can't risk our Imperators life not fully understanding the situation for all we know the moment we kill the xeno female our Imperator will never wake up even after transferring his consciousness Into his backup body"

Captain Jameson sided with Frank as he explained his point of view.

Wolf remained silent as his brain worked overtime only for Seargent Mirovs voice to reverberate Inside the underground command bunker.

As he did Wolf closed his eyes and took a deep breath only for his lips to curl Into a grin as a memory of his dead drunk Imperator telling him about what kind of women he liked replayed Itself I'm his mind.

"I like... burp... them hourglass shaped, shorter than me... burp... as crazy as me, and..."

The Imperator paused as he took another swing of his vodka almost falling off his chair In the process.

"...I absolutely dig goth vampire chicks man... burp... I'd tap that kind of ass all day, night long until my hips break"

No matter how I look at It that xeno female although 20 centimeters taller than the Imperator's Ideal height Is a perfect fit for his tastes.

Wolf who had always been a bit different from his battle brothers, as Dracula would have put It more human and that was because Dracula had created him In the Image of his best friend who although wasn't related to him by blood but was considered by him as more of a brother than a real one thought as he opened his eyes.

"Captain Jameson and Frank head to the medical complex ASAP to receive our Imperator at once I don't care what you have to do our Imperator must come back to us"

Wolf barked with a tone that didn't allow any failure.

"Yes sir!"

The good and bad doc answered In unison as they clicked their heels together, straightened their backs, and performed modern military salutes.

"And Hans without our Imperators say the xeno female Is not lose even a hair of hers got It?"

Wolf asked as he focused his eyes on Hans cold ones devoid of any emotion.

"Yes sir!"

Hans answered In an emotionless voice as he too snapped to attention and performed a salute.

...

"...copy over"

Sergeant Mirov finished listening to Wolf's direct orders while senior privates Han and Rob were once again evaluating Dracula's condition.

"What the... f*cking green skins they must have f*cked up my helmets visors"

Senior private Rob muttered as he once again put Dracula on a new stretcher with the help of another marine.

"By any chance, battle brother Rob are your scans also showing that our Imperator just grew by one millimeter?

Senior private Han asked with a funny sounding voice.

"So they f*cked up you're helmet too... wait... oh for the love of the g*ds, first zombies now this?!"

Senior private Rob cursed realizing that It was Impossible that two helmets visors were having the same malfunction at the same time.

As he once again covered Dracula with a new thermal blanket and secured the stretcher's straps.

"We're moving now!"

Came Seargent a Mirovs roar.

"F*ck let the big wigs figure out just what the f*ck I's going on!"

Senior private cursed as he motioned for three cosmic marines who Immediately ran over.

"3,2,1 up!"

With senior privates Robs command, he and the other three cosmic marines stood up while pulling up Dracula securely strapped Inside the stretcher from the ground In one go.

"Go!Go!Go!"

...

"Well, that was anticlimactic..."

Desire chose to break the awkward silence.

"You know you call yourself knowledge yet you forgot to mention that you used our own nanites to create Vlad and Vanessa"

Civilization said In neither a funny nor sad voice while focusing his eyes on the red as a tomato from the embarrassment he was feeling knowledge.

"Cough*Cough* It was thousands of years ago guys, cut me some slack will you?"

Knowledge said meekly with a lowered gaze after coughing a few times to mask his embarrassment only for War to star laughing like a maniac.

"Hahaha, I can't... Pfft... I can't... hahaha... I... I can already Imagine the look on Ragnarok's face then one of his minions gets their asses f*cked... hahaha...!"

The livid war laughed her ass off to the point that she fell of her throne while clutching her stomach as tears leaked out from her eyes from how hard she was laughing.