Chapter thirty-four - Jonathan's choice

If music was a visible, tangible thing, Jess imagined it would look like the smoke from a recently snuffed candle. Writhing in the air, smooth and sinuous, or sharp and erratic; moved along by the currents and eddies of the dancing notes.

As Gareth concentrated on his guitar, the tune drifted out across the audience, mesmerising like a snake charmer with his flute. The bridge stood out from the verses with a discordant note of sadness and longing, echoed by the mournful cry of the guitar. Jess couldn't tell whether Gareth had his eyes closed or if he was checking his placement on the frets. Whichever it was, he appeared completely absorbed in his music. As were those watching his performance.

To Jessica's untrained and uncritical ears, his playing was incredible.

When the song returned to the chorus, and Gareth retreated from the immediate spotlight, she leaned closer to Jon. "I didn't know he was in a band."

"He isn't. Their regular guitarist is visiting his mum in hospital. Gareth has helped them out in the past, but oh, not for five or six months."

While Rhys strutted around the stage, playing up to his fans and exciting the crowd, Gareth stood off to the right, near the back wall. Either he was consciously trying not to draw attention to himself, or the music had sent him off in a world of his own.

Jess stood on her toes, trying to get a better view, but there were too many people between her and the stage. Now, she could only see Gareth's head and shoulders. Then he looked up, his gaze resting on the front row of the audience. A couple of women called out his name and he smiled back at them. It was a brief, almost shy smile, but the few who saw it shouted and whooped in response. One girl yelled something Jess couldn't understand, but whatever it was made him laugh.

She melted at his burst of unguarded laughter. He looked so genuinely happy in that moment. While they played more songs, Jess found it difficult to tear her eyes away from the stage.

As the last note of the set faded, Rhys thanked their audience for coming and Gareth for his help. The mere mention of him started the girls in the front row off again. One or two screamed and cried out his name. He waved, but in a tight, controlled way. He was being polite, but Jess felt certain he would have preferred the attention on the rest of the band rather than him personally.

As the audience began to disperse, Jon pointed towards a raised area off to the side where a couple of empty tables had opened up. When they sat down, he asked what she thought of the music.

"He's good, isn't he?"

"Gareth? A bit rusty. That's the first time he's been on stage since the fandemonium began."

"The what?"

Jon smiled. "That's what we called the weeks straight after the advert aired. The time where he couldn't buy a bottle of milk without getting mobbed by paparazzi or strange women stopping him on the street. That was why he spent so much time here instead of staying in London. Thankfully, things seem to be calming down a bit now."

"It must have been awful for him." Jess stared across the room. Gareth had stepped off the tiny stage and was chatting with a small group of people. Having only known the calm, slightly shy Gareth before, she'd never seen him quite so animated. But this was the first time she'd been there while he was hanging out with his own friends. People he'd known for years.

She wished he could be as relaxed in her company.

One of the girls standing in Gareth's group was blushing, her hand resting on his arm, her eyes looking up into his like a puppy staring adoringly at its owner. He leaned closer, whispering something in her ear. She flicked back her blonde hair and laughed.

Jess dragged her gaze away from Gareth, a twinge of some unnamed emotion in her stomach. "Fame seems like such a double-edged sword. I'm not sure why anyone would want it."

"He doesn't." Jon shifted in his seat and sipped from his pint. He was frowning at his friend, in close conversation with the blonde. The girl was laughing again. What had he said that was so funny? Or did she laugh at everything? "Poor Gareth," Jon said eventually. "We ought to rescue him."

"From the blonde?" Jess bit her lip. She should have pretended ignorance instead of making it so obvious that she'd scrutinised his every move. "He seems happy enough." Happier than when the reporter had visited him this morning, at least. This time he wasn't standing twelve feet back and didn't have his hands in his pockets either.

"That girl he's talking to is Clare. She's his ex, or one of them at least."

"It looks like they get on well, for exes." Jess thought they were getting on a little too well.

"Oh, he still talks to them all. He's not one to hold grudges. I'm guessing she wishes she hadn't cheated on him with Aaron Harris now. Our Gareth might be a softy, but he's no one's doormat." As another girl joined the group, Jon began to laugh. "This could be fun. Watch."

A raven-haired girl in a cerise top and mini skirt chatted with Gareth and Clare, gradually sliding in between them. It reminded Jess of the time she'd met Gareth immediately following that embarrassing audition. Then, it had been Gareth's supposed girlfriend who had eased herself between them, protecting him, Jess now realised, from a possible crazy fan.

When Clare found herself similarly cut out of the conversation, Jon nodded his appreciation. "Smooth move."

"Who is that?" Jess pointed at the new girl now commanding all of Gareth's attention. The one in shocking pink.

"Hannah? Or maybe it was Anna. I can't remember. She didn't stick around long."

"Another one of his exes?"

"From years ago. We were still at school then. Kids really. Even as a spotty teen he used to beat them off with a stick."

"She isn't a kid any more, and she's very pretty." What sort of man was friendly with his former girlfriends? A good one, her inner voice replied.

"And a fat lot of good that'll do her. As soon as she's done there's another one hovering around, waiting for her chance."

"Where?"

"On the right, standing behind Gareth. The one with the see-through shirt and black bra. He fancied her a few years back, but she wouldn't give him so much as a parking ticket. But now...now he's a bit famous, they're all coming out of the woodwork, so to speak. It's no wonder he doesn't come down here so often. How can the lad have a quiet drink with his mates if they won't leave him alone?"

"Why doesn't his...his ...come to visit? These others wouldn't bother him so much if she was here."

"She's supposed to keep the national media entertained, but she wouldn't work on the locals. They know our boy too well for that. Most of our old friends are happy to let him be, but there's always one or two who only want to be seen with the bloke who had his photo in the Daily Mail. Ghouls, they are. Bloodsucking ghouls."

While Jon went to the bar, Jess observed Gareth from the corner of her eye. On the face of it, he looked like any other man chatting up a pretty girl, laughing and smiling in all the right places. Ms Cerise was flirting up a storm, and it appeared mutual. It was only as she watched him more closely that she recognised how uncomfortable he looked. Gareth's smile was fixed, not quite reaching his eyes. Whenever the black haired beauty touched him, he subtly pulled back, so she never managed to hold onto him for very long.