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Technoblade Never Dies: A New Adventure

After losing the battle to his stage 4 cancer on 1 Jul 2022, Technoblade finds himself getting transported into a world that he is very familiar with. Looking at his reflection, Technoblade realises that now he was a character of the very game he held legendary records for - Minecraft. As a pig with his crown, Technoblade has to start his new life in a world far from his fans, using all the knowledge he knows about the game to beat the newest update from the gaming gods. With the blessings of his fans, can Technoblade find happiness in his new life? AN: I'm grieving very badly over the sudden loss of a genius content creator who died at the tender age of 23. Leave the hate out of this. It's my coping mechanism with the loss, you don't have to read it. People are not lost when they die. They are lost when they are forgotten.

Destiny_Aitsuji · Video Games
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44 Chs

Unicorn Steak

He'd eaten beef, pork, mutton, chicken and fish before. The quirkiest thing was probably turkey, but eating horse meat was something Technoblade did not think he would be doing – if a unicorn was a horse.

The flower forest was not very far from his mountain, and the mushroom meadow was in the vicinity. Technoblade liked how magical the new biomes felt compared to the boring Minecraft versions. There were bees in the flower forest that Technoblade left alone. He wasn't going to risk angering a hive of bees just for honey because he watched how a bear who tore open a hive for honey became stung to death.

Yes, there were honey bears. Technoblade was excited to meet some Aftercraft pandas when he finally found a jungle. He wasn't sure if a tropical jungle was the same thing as a bamboo forest type of jungle, but it was a nice thing to have around.

Apart from trees, plenty of flower variants and animals, the flower biome came alive at dawn, and Technoblade found out that the biome was charged with magic. The bee turned into fairies at dawn and created fairy circles out of mushrooms in the nearby mushroom meadow before turning back into bees in the afternoon. Nearing evening, the biome would be covered in a layer of fog, and that was where Technoblade saw it.

From afar, the shape looked like a horse. Technoblade had no idea what came over him. However, he took aim and shot at it. In one shot, the overpowered bow killed the horse in the mist, and Technoblade hurried over to collect his game.

The horse looked horribly gay. No, literally. Its mane was the colour of a pride flag. If it weren't for the horn in the middle of its head, Technoblade would have doubted himself. The horse that he killed was actually a unicorn, and while he had no idea if they were rare or hostile, he decided to do the logical thing – cook it.

Using his system to grill it over an open fire, Technoblade slept the night off and awoke to tasty hor-unicorn meat. Aftercraft's system dubbed it a medium-rare unicorn steak. Technoblade wasn't going to argue over it. Curious and slightly apprehensive about the edibility of a magical creature, Technoblade wished there were cows nearby. Milk was the drink he needed to cure just about any negative effects.

"Here goes nothing," he inhaled deeply and took a huge bite out of the unicorn steak.

An imaginary firework show exploded in Technoblade's mouth at this strange steak. Unicorn meat tasted like beef but sweeter. It constantly changed flavours as Technoblade chewed, reminding him a little of the bubblegum meal Willy Wonka made. Uncaring of the consequences, Technoblade finished the rest of the steak forgetting his guilt. It was delicious!

"That has to be the most flavourful thing I've ever tasted in Aftercraft," the Potato Lord smacked his lips in satisfaction and looked around. Should he wait for another night to hunt another unicorn?

Thinking about it, Technoblade laughed. The unicorn had to be a trap if the cake was a lie. He had eight more biomes to locate on foot. The closest was a few thousand blocks away.

"We will meet again if fate permits," he reluctantly bid goodbye to the flower forest and mushroom meadow.

Honestly, this was probably the highlight of his Aftercraft life. Anyone with the money can brag about eating caviar or truffle. But what were the chances of someone else bragging about tasting unicorn meat?

Feeling better already, Technoblade dodged low-hanging leaves in the new patch of birch forest. He wanted to get to the new mysterious biome past this huge mountain range in the distance.

After three days of running, Technoblade finally reached the top of the tallest mountain he could find. It was a little snowy at the peak, but Technoblade need not worry about temperature differences with his [Thermoflux] skill. [Fast Traveller] and [Weightless] saved Technoblade a lot of time descending mountains. Even without the MLG water bucket clutch, he suffered no damage flying off cliffs.

"That looks like a snowy taiga biome. I already explored that, but I suppose going ahead will lead me to the glacier biomes."

Looking at the unexplored biome list, Technoblade guessed he was first finding either the snowy mountain or ice ocean biome. It was a shame because he really wanted to find the desert. There would be an abandoned pyramid full of treasures to loot. Technoblade wanted to know if Aftercraft's version of a desert temple would resemble the adventures of Lara Croft in Tomb Raider. If the desert temple was boring, the jungle would be boring too.

"Whee!" launching himself off the mountain peak into the direction of the snowy taiga, Technoblade kept his eyes peeled for unique animals in this biome.

Hop! Hop!

The first animal that crossed Technoblade's path was a baby bunny, and the Potato King groaned. He liked rabbit stews but killing a rabbit was hard. These little creatures had little meat, jumped too fast to shoot and could burrow underground to avoid attacks. Maybe he should leave it alone. The fact that he could get rabbit hides but required nine times the amount to craft the same set of leather clothes for his villagers made Technoblade reconsider killing them.

Was it really worth it?

Lowering his bow, Technoblade watched the terrified baby bunny hop away and disappear into a burrow. It will live for today.

The snowfall became heavier as he ventured deeper into the taiga forest, and Technoblade struggled when his feet became stuck in snow pits. Thankfully, he was able to dig himself out with a shovel. Without the temperature regulating skill, he might not survive this blizzard.

"Do blizzards pass in Aftercraft?" he wondered. Minecraft had random weather events from time to time, such as rain and thunderstorms. Maybe if he waited it out, this horrible snowstorm would pass.

Just like that, Technoblade spent two days in a foreign land exploring caves and following rabbits. Part of him felt like Alice from Wonderland when he failed to catch the rabbits. The fact that there were only white rabbits in this snowy biome made him cringe at how he tried to squeeze through holes to get to the bottom of the mystery of rabbits in Aftercraft. Eventually, he lost his way chasing rabbits and decided to explore a cave that ran deeper than his hatred for beets.

Somewhere, somehow, in this deep and twisty cave, Technoblade found himself discovering the snowy mountain biome without the snow.

"I'll call this profit," he laughed while mining some diamonds in the cave and decapitating zombies faster than they could walk over.

With three discovered biomes, Technoblade started feeling more optimistic. The overworld compass was pointing in a different direction, and Technoblade decided not to waste any more time getting sidetracked. He only had seven more biomes. Surely it would not be very difficult to find them all, right?

It's my birthday!

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