Resolute Decision (3)

As I wanted to fight now so I decided to focus on getting healthy first. I decided to sleep but when I lay down, I could not fall asleep as my mind still wondered what should be done. I lay there for a long time trying to sleep when I heard the sound of footsteps enter the door. I knew it was James and I don't know why but I pretended to be asleep as he entered the room.

He sat next to me and didn't do anything for a long while, I tried hard to not let my heart beat get out of control in anticipation. He creased my cheek softly and it was filled with so much love and desire that even though my eyes were closed, I could feel that. He soon lifted his hand and held held my hand as he began to speak "I am sorry for being like this but I am doing all this to protect you, it is not just Cameron that is dangerous, I have to stay by your side because I have to protect you from other creatures too. We didn't have a chance encounter, I made it seem like that. Why don't you accept what your heart says because I don't know for how long I can hold onto my desire, it has already been a while. I pretended to not know about you to make sure that you are safe but I know that you are the princess who ran away. Although I don't know your past, I just want to protect you because I love you. If you keep being like this I don't know what I will end up doing to you."

I felt like crying at the thought that he already knew about me and yet he wanted to protect me because if it were anyone else, I would have been dead by now. My heart trembled with fear at that thought and then I wondered if this person had been protecting me since the time I came here. I had to ask and I didn't care if I looked bad as to have listened to what I should not have. I opened my eyes and he stumbled backwards letting go of my hand, his eyes opened wide with shock "Have you been away all this while."

I nodded and tried to get up but he was quick enough to pin me to the bed "Don't move, tell me what you need."

I looked at him with teary eyes "I am sorry to have listened to it but how long have you been protecting me."

There was a flicker of pain in his eyes but he didn't answer me and quickly got up to go out of the room. I was desperate to know about this so I shouted "If you don't answer, I will start walking around the room and hurt myself and you know I don't care about myself."

He gritted his teeth as he left dropped his hand that was on the door handle and came to stand in front of me "Why are you so stubborn."

I held his hand "Please tell me."

He sat down next to me and said helplessly "The night before Ethan died, he managed to make a call and it was me who he called as I was his best friend. Nobody knew about me not even you and it was to protect you so that I could remain alive to protect you. He made me promise that no matter what happens I have to protect you. He had saved my life once so I could not say no to him but at that moment I hated you for being the reason of his death. I don't know what had happened back then and I just wanted you dead but because of that promise I began to protect you in secret. I saw you cry for him so many times while I was keeping an eye on you, I saw and felt how real your love was for him and slowly I began to like everything about you. Eventually I forgot the hatred and began to love you. I know you are a princess and you hate the life of the castle but think like this you have the power and you can make the changes, you can change the things you don't like."

Tears rolled down my eyes and I looked down at my feet "This time when I was captured, I realized that I was not doing right by just running away and I thought if I made my way out of his grip, I would return back. I want to train harder and make myself stronger to take the revenge and make his sacrifice worthwhile."

James smiled "This time you are not lying and I can see that."

I nodded my head "I am not and I really want to thank you for saving me today."

He smiled "It you want to do that then stay with me and love me."

I shook my head "Please don't make it difficult for me than it already is."

I could see that his expression stiffened as he said "I see, what is it?"

My heart ached for him but I fought with myself that the place in my heart only belonged to Ethan so I said boldly "Now that you know about him, you should know how much I love him and how no one can replace him in my heart so no matter what you do I can not love you back. I have only fallen in love one and I can not do that again. I work hard to get more physical strength but I can never be strong enough to let him go or love again."

I wanted to say so much more but as the horrible memory of his death flashed across my mind, I began to cry. When I was finally done crying he moved away and said "I will leave you alone if you prove to me that what you feel for him is love and not just guilt."