28 Survival Cooking

John found himself trudging to the school's kitchens with a look of pure horror on his face. Mike had done his best to try and skip this class due to his "injuries", but the teacher was having none of that.

"You're still hurt? Well then, I'll just have to whip up a special rhino dung and honey soup that'll perk you right up." Mr. Pike said with an innocent smile on his face.

His face turning even more pale than it had been after the Panther slammed him to the ground, Mike shook his head frantically, "No, no, you don't need to do that! I'll figure something out, don't worry about me!" John and Steven were snickering just outside the classroom, laughing at Mike's predicament.

"Oh, in that case we'll just have to have a class on medicinal recipes. That way you can both heal and attend your classes." Mr. Pike said, a light bulb going off in his head.

Which is why instead of the jungle classroom learning how to cook slugs and spiders, the entire class had walked to the kitchens.

Opening the door John wasn't surprised to find Ms. Compton, the head chef for the entire school, glaring at Mr. Pike as if he was dirt she needed to bleach off her spotless floor. "What are you doing here?" She said.

"I have an injured student, so I decided to teach my class about medicinal recipes." Mr. Pike said nonchalantly.

"Really now?" Ms. Compton perked up a bit at that, "Then I guess I'll take over for the day."

Everyone in the class smiled, a look of pure relief on their faces as they got ready to eat the most delicious food in the world.

"No, no." Mr. Pike said with a smile, "This is a survival cooking class, I'm just going to teach them how to make a healing recipe using commonly found ingredients in danger zones. If they decide to take advanced cooking then you'll have the chance to teach them."

Ms. Compton's glare returned immediately, "I swear, the only reason the school hired you is to teach the students to survive eating disgusting shit. If they really wanted to learn how to cook properly in danger zones they would've had me teach the class!"

Mr. Pike's smile turned evil for a second before returning to it's original lazy state. "Don't worry about it, I'll use room 6."

Ms. Compton turned back to her cooking and pointedly ignored Mr. Pike as she yelled to one of her assistants, "Make 100 servings of the palate cleanser! No reason to torture the students unduly."

By this point, the entire class was glaring at Mike wishing the Panther had finished him off. Even John and Steven were entertaining thoughts of finishing him off now. They were sure they could hide the body long enough to get through the barrier and feed it to the monsters... Unfortunately for everyone, it was already too late.

"Alright class." Mr. Pike said after they walked into room 6 and he set it on a forest scene. "Gather enough fire wood for half an hour of burning at 150 degrees Celsius, I'll provide the ingredients." He turned to walk out and gather ingredients for everyone while they got to work.

Walking back into the class 15 minutes later, Mr. Pike was happy to see everyone had enough wood and many had already started their fires. "Gather round!" He yelled out jovially, a massive smile on his face. "Class, can you tell me what this is?" He held up a purple and black leaf. Someone from the back of the class raised her hand.

"Go ahead." He said, pointing at her.

"It's the leaf of a mutated poison ivy!"

"Good! Like most normal forests and plains, danger zones are covered in this shit!"

Putting it down, he pulled out another ingredient, "This is the shit of a rank 8 monster. All monsters after rank 9 leave behind concentrated mana in their excrement, processing it we can use the mana in several different ways."

Putting it down, he pulled out a horn. "This is the horn of a rabbit monster. File it down to expose the pores, then place it in boiling water along with poison ivy and monster dung. Let it soak for 15 minutes, then pull it out and dice it up."

Pulling out a hunk of meat he said, "This is the meat of a minion, doesn't really matter what kind or rank of monster meat, just make sure it isn't poisonous. After you've diced up the horn, smash it into a fine powder and coat the meat in it before searing it. Make sure to thoroughly cook the meat, don't want to get any parasites or diseases."

Without another word, Mr. Pike handed the ingredients out to everyone and they got to work. While he was bringing the water to a boil, John said. "This actually doesn't sound too bad. I mean, the monster shit is disgusting but at least we're not eating it as is."

Steve nodded in agreement as he carefully filed his rabbit horn down. "Yeah, I've never heard of cooking like this before. I wonder where Mr. Pike learned this recipe."

Half an hour later, the entire class brought forwards a plate of food for Mr. Pike to examine. He'd had them do this last class. As much as he enjoyed making everyone puke in disgust, he refused to actually harm one of his students. He'd heard one too many stories about what happened to those who did for him to risk it.

"Good. Good. Good." He went down the line nodding his head at each student who made the recipe successfully, "Fail, you didn't let the horn soak long enough." The first student to fail was sent out of the classroom trying to decide if he was happy or sad. Gallandwell High didn't treat people who failed in classes well. On the other hand eating that mess would probably have been worse than having an arm cut off...

Having passed the test, John, Mike, Steven, and Kara all gathered together and stared at the meat on their plates. At least it was a small hunk, a large bite and they'd be done.

"Alright class, eat up!" Mr. Pike said, that evil grin back on his face.

Sighing, John decided to get it over with as quickly as possible. Picking up the entire piece of meat, he threw it into his mouth and chewed the minimum amount to make it go down. At the first bite, his face turned red and his tongue went numb.

Seeing that everyone had started eating, Mr. Pike started going over the properties of the meal. "The mutated poison ivy is an incredible sedative. If you're ever severely injured or need to knock a monster out, gather a bunch of it and mash it up before boiling it. You can coat bullets, arrows, and swords in it to cause enemies to go numb and lose the ability to move. In this case, it numbs the mouth and tongue just enough to keep you from throwing up."

As he spoke, John kept chewing and the taste of shit combined with unseasoned meat was so overpowering it was all he could do not to puke.

"The shit," Mr. Pike kept speaking, ignoring the choking and gagging sounds coming from all around him. "is filled with concentrated mana. By soaking it in boiling water with the porous rabbit horn you gather it's energy in an easily digestible container that nourishes and heals your body. It also aids in cultivation, although you should only use it when attempting a breakthrough as long term use of elixirs in cultivation is harmful to your foundation."

John had finally managed to finish chewing and swallowed. He could feel the meat plop into his stomach acid and sizzle. To his surprise, now that he didn't have to constantly chew the disgusting food, he found himself groaning in pleasure as the energy diffused into his body at incredible speeds.

"The monster meat helps your body digest the horn and energy more thoroughly along with aiding in body cultivation. Before you cultivate, each of you should visit the cafeteria to eat an elixir meal. These will be much more palatable as they'll be using ingredients harder to find in danger zones, whereas you can find these in the vast majority of them. Ms. Compton has finished compiling your physical data by this point and will have devised an elixir meal plan for you. Follow it religiously and you'll find your time in the Body Refining Realm shortened considerably."