A Step Closer

It was getting so much colder that week. The next time Samantha visited again, the snow began falling. They walked around the garden of Rainier's private palace after lunch, clad in fur coats and gloves.

"Am I wrong to--feel attracted to him?"

Samantha chuckled at that.

"I just thought of five different answers and point of views to answer that question. I have to say, My Queen, you are a delightful patient. You always keep my brain well-exercised."

Gwen narrowed her eyes at her.

Rainier spent his free time solving sudoku puzzles, or complicated math problems that seemed to never end. He had a small desk beside his main desk filled with papers of his counting.

She found Samantha similar to Rainier. Perhaps their brains were both really scientific. They were both so to the point, smart and a little insane.

"First, logically, it's normal for women to be attracted to the king. He is handsome, smart, rich and well, he's the king. Plus he knew what to do to seduce women. Secondly, as his cousin, I really want your relationship to improve. So by all means, be attracted to him, the more, the better."

"Third, as a psychiatrist, I think that you are lonely in this place. You know very few people. It's only normal that you feel an attachment to someone who brought you here, who shows a very deep interest in you, and even shows that he needs you. You tie the validity of your existence with him, and that is really human.

Fourth, going with the flow is always easier than fighting the current. In your situation, it's easier to fall for him rather than continue hating him. So why not just go with the flow?

And finally, I have always wanted for my cousin, the king, or Ray, to settle down with a good woman. Someone who has a good character and could be a good queen. Furthermore, someone who could make him be a better person. Someone who could cure his pain and his fatal point of view of life. That person is you, I'm sure."

Gwen listened to Samantha's speech in awe. She spoke quickly, melodiously, with conviction in her tone, and grace in her attitude. Definitely the daughter of the Hansen Royal Family.

"Did they teach you how to speak this well?"

"I was trained in public speaking since I was seven."

"Rainier as well?"

"Of course. We went to the same school until high school level. I am five years older than him. For royal duties, I had the same tutor as his until I graduated high school. However, for me, the royal education stopped when I entered medical school. For him, it continued until he graduated from college."

They were silent for a while, as Gwen was lost in her own thoughts, imagining little Rainier and Samantha studying together. Was Samantha happier than Rainier?

"Would you be the queen? If you have the chance?"

"With all my heart, I hope I will never have to. I won't be able to shoulder the burden. I'm not King Rainier. Besides, the only condition I should be the queen is if he dies without a son. I don't want that to happen."

Gwen peered into her face, and she only saw an honest expression.

"I'm happy with my job. I excel in it. It's my expertise. Leaving it to lead this kingdom is unimaginable. I hope Rainier can be the king for a long time, and be replaced by his son."

"Then why did you get the royal education as well?"

"Because we always have to prepare for any emergency situation. Aunt Yelena had it too. She's the sister of the previous king. When the previous king passed away, she refused to be the regent. So Rainier, who was ten years old, began his rule with five advisors."

The five advisors that he killed, Gwen thought, but she didn't say it out loud.

"Above all, although this is cliche, I really suggest for you to follow your heart. Don't label your feelings. Just do what makes you happy, My Queen."

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On Christmas Eve, Gwen finally finished wrapping gifts for Rainier, Samantha, and Aunt Yelena.

She didn't hold money, but Rainier gave Sally a credit card for Gwen to use. With his permission, she went to the biggest mall in Broadstower with Sally, Ingrid and Jeremy.

It was really such a complicated trip for something so simple. Ingrid and Jeremy emptied each shop that she visited, and people were all taking pictures and videos of her from a distance. She didn't enjoy being the center of attention.

It was the first day of fan photos and fan videos of the Queen of Galsbourg. Gwen had no other choice, because she had to buy some gifts.

She had known the Hansen family so briefly, and was confused of what to give them for Christmas presents.

Finally, she decided to buy a fountain pen for Rainier. It was engraved with his name. For Samantha, she bought a leather-bound journal. For Aunt Yelena, she bought a high-end hand cream.

She wrapped them all prettily and wrote cards for them.

Once everything was wrapped and the cards were put on top of each gifts, she felt that those were so simple and humble compared to everything they owned.

Still, at least she was not empty handed.

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Thinking and the reality of her relationship with Rainier never matched. Ever since they returned from Piercedge City, they slept together in one bed every night. It was originally his bedroom.

She's a bit worried that he'd want sex everyday. She didn't feel she'd be able to handle that. She's always so emotionally affected after they did it that doing it often would, she was sure, ruined her sanity.

But so far, he hadn't initiated it, and she's relieved for that.

However, there was an awkwardness between them. They didn't talk much. And there was tension in the air.

From her part, it wasn't hatred anymore. No, she had overcome that. Yet she knew very little of him, except what she read about him. Even when she started a conversation, he's someone who'd answer her briefly and straight to the point.

He wasn't being mean or unkind. It was just the way he was. It was his character. He hated to speak about himself. Meanwhile, Gwen believed they needed to talk more to each other.

From her point of view, they skipped so many important stages of a relationship.

They had sex before she even understood who he was. He declared they were married when she still hated him. And they lived under one roof and slept in one bed before they even had a cup of coffee together at any cafes.

It was all really frustrating. The normal order of a relationship never happened for them. It was so jumbled.

"What's bothering you?"

Gwen was so shocked because he suddenly spoke, until she nearly jumped out of her skin.

"I'm--just something."

Rainer lowered his iPad and scrutinized her.

"What is this something?"

She sighed, "I'll tell you tomorrow."

"Why won't you tell me now?"

"I don't want to tell you now. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

With that, she turned off the lamp on her side and pretended she's going to sleep.

Rainier stared at her for a moment, before turning off his own lamp on the bedside drawer, and lied down.

The next day would be his first Christmas with Gwen. He had to admit, it was the first Christmas he looked forward to since his father died.

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