69. Alone At Last

April, 2010

Rick considered running back to Kate once he finally got off the phone with Afaitu and Jim. Considered, but decided that running was just a bit too childish.

Instead, he skipped.

He didn't need any light to guide him back, though he'd been offered a flashlight by Laurent. This path was as familiar to him as his old apartment in New York had been. He could traverse it with his eyes closed, and often had in his mind when he was languishing in Nuutania.

He managed to control himself enough to keep from vaulting onto the porch—waking the children would be an absolute disaster at this juncture. Concentrating on his ninja like skills, coupled with the inky darkness that engulfed the clearing, he entirely missed the fact that Kate was sitting on the porch waiting for him.

Thus, he was grateful the high squeal he let out as he mounted the stairs so stealthily was no stronger than it was.

"That was a long conversation!"

He clapped a hand over his mouth to keep more squeals from escaping and tried to calm his galloping heart as he peered into the black, unsuccessfully. "Kate?"

"No, it's Salesi." He thought the sarcastic tone was uncalled for, given that she'd taken a year off of his life. However, the thought of being alone with her—at long last—kept his mouth shut.

Her voice was issuing from the left side of the porch, opposite of the side with the shower. The side with bench that they usually sat on to watch the sunset. He let out a small chuckle as he moved to join her.

"You startled me. I thought you'd be inside."

"Yeah, the shriek kinda gave you away. Kids went down the minute we got them in bed, so I thought I'd wait out here for you. Took a while."

"There was a lot of information; a lot for us to discuss," he explained as he sat next to her and pulled her into his side. His breath caught; this was where he belonged. Next to her. Side by side they'd overcome so very much together. Without her next to him, he'd been lost.

"Is discussion all you have in mind tonight?" she whispered, running her finger along his cheek.

Suddenly, his heart was galloping out of control once again. But no squealing was involved.

He'd describe it more as a keening moan than a squeal.

Kate stretched languidly next to her husband. They'd been driven off the porch by a light rain, though to be honest they hadn't noticed it for a while. Plus, it had felt a bit soothing on hot, sweaty bodies.

But, as gratifying as greeting him on the porch had been, having him next to her in bed settled her soul back into its rightful spot. She'd felt incomplete while he was missing, and at no time had it been more noticeable than when she was alone at night.

She felt him stir, then suddenly sit up in alarm.

"Holy crap!"

"Shh, Rick, you'll wake the kids. What's wrong?"

He lay back slowly, propped up by an elbow on his side. She couldn't make out his face in the pitch-black night, but the tension in his body radiated his concern, even without being able to see his eyes.

"Kate, I'm so sorry," he groaned. "We didn't think about protection."

She giggled, relieved that was all he was worried about. "No, we didn't. But there's nothing immediate on the island, since I assume you've not had access to papaya seeds?"

"No. I never even thought about grabbing condoms. All of my focus was on getting here, making you safe."

She reached over and stroked his arm. "It's ok, Rick. We'll start using protection when we get a chance, and besides, we're rescued. We're safe. Even if I get pregnant now, this time we'll at least have access to medical care."

"Do you want more kids? We haven't talked about it since Sarah was born."

"I'm not opposed to it. You know that most of the time my pregnancies have been easy, and the deliveries have been straightforward."

"Thank God," he choked. "When I think about what could have happened…what would I have done without you, Kate? Six months apart nearly drove me insane."

"But it all went fine. And you're back now. We're a family again."

"So you want another baby?"

"Noooo," she trailed off.

"No?"

"Not no, no."

"Huh?"

"No, not now, preferably. But if it happens, it happens. Could you have waited until we got back to Tahiti, or wherever we're going? 'Cause we both know your great sea sponge idea was how we got Alex."

"Uh, no. I wasn't sure I could wait until nightfall. Waiting for days really would have sent me over the edge." He leaned over and kissed her deeply before withdrawing slightly. "Lying next to you, being able to touch you, caress you without being able to have you completely? I would have been a delirious, blubbering fool before the sun rose again."

"A blubbering fool?" she teased. "More likely a petrified giant, unable to do anything more than stand and stare at me."

That brought a deeper laugh from her husband. "What can I say, you've affected me deeply from the very first moment I saw you."

"All I could think of was that you must have been mentally handicapped; able bodied physically to work on a ship, but unable to speak."

He captured her lips again before starting a trail of kisses down her neck. "I'll show you just how able bodied I can be, Kate."

"When are we going to talk about the phone call?" she gasped. It wasn't meant to be a protest, at least not against what he was doing, oh, right there.

"Later," he growled, moving his soft lips down past her neck.

Later was fine with her.

"I sure hope the kids sleep in this morning," he murmured, nuzzling her.

"You wish," she snickered, arching into his embrace a little tighter. "At least I'll get a chance to sleep in."

"Huh?"

"Well, it's your first morning back with them. They won't want me getting them breakfast. I figure I'll just lounge in bed, maybe get a few extra z's."

"You've got a point. And I certainly don't mind the image of you lying in bed after the night we've had."

"Well, we do need to get some sleep. But I think it's more important that we talk things over first."

"You're right, Kate. There's so much." He paused for a minute, trying to sort out in his head where to begin. Overwhelmed with it all, he didn't notice that he was breathing faster or how tense he'd become until he felt Kate's gentle touch rubbing his shoulder.

"Relax, Rick. Why don't you start with the phone call and we'll go from there."

He took in a gulp of air, then let out a heavy sigh. "Ok, that's as good as any place to start. I wish you could have heard it too; it was just bad timing for him to call right at the kid's bedtime."

"I knew you'd be able to catch me up on everything. So, what's going on?"

"Well, Tamahere and I told you earlier about taking Ari'i's cargo ship, then rendezvousing with his friend in another cargo ship. Afaitu had discovered that the French Navy was looking for us and he thought that having the two ships would confuse things a little. Plus, the AFP crew had helicoptered to the other cargo ship and needed to join us for the final push with their Zodiac boat."

"That was all Afaitu's plan?"

"Yeah. When we left Mo'orea we had no idea that Grollet would activate the Navy. My only plan was to get to you as fast as humanly possible, so I was intending as straight a line to this island as we could make. You should have seen how upset I was when the boat turned south. Salesi nearly had to restrain me."

"Thank goodness we had so many people helping you."

"Oh, Kate, it's been such a blessing. I can't wait for you to be able to meet everyone, but especially Afaitu. He's been the glue that held me together all this time."

"I'm sure I'll love him, babe. He's done so much for us."

"Anyway, Ari'i's cargo ship, the Vaitiare, is still fairly close. Ari'i could be here in less than a day. The downside is that she's a cargo ship, like the Iriata, and not made for speed. It will take many days to get to our next destination."

"Is there another option? The Zodiac's range can't be too far."

"There is, but I'm not sure what you'll think about it. I'm not sure I know what I think about it," he mumbled, trailing off.

"A plane?"

"Huh? No, not a plane. Actually, Afaitu did mention a sea plane, but I told him I didn't think the kids would handle that big of a shock. I'd like to have a few days on a ship to introduce them more gradually to modern life. Do you agree?"

She kissed him, quickly, grateful at how in sync they still were with each other.

"Completely agree. The boys will be very excited at whatever means of transportation we use, but to whisk them from here to a city in a matter of hours would really be overwhelming. I think a transition by boat is easier."

"So, that leaves us with the other ship as an option."

"The other cargo ship?"

"Uh, no. The Naval ship that was chasing us. The French government has offered to have it come pick us up. There are advantages: it's much bigger and much faster than the cargo ship. I'm sure that the French would much prefer us to come back to Papeete in the safety of one of their modern ships. The positive publicity would help them tremendously."

"What are the disadvantages?"

"Well, for one, we'd be going back to Papeete for sure. My original plan had been for us to go to the Marquesas, where Ari'i is from. I thought we could hide out from Grollet until we exposed him for the diabolical asshole that he is. We don't need to do that now that Grollet forced our hand."

"But hiding out sounds good to me." The longing in her voice was for a future that she knew was no longer possible: anonymity.

"Yeah, but it's no longer possible. You saw the TV program that aired. Afaitu told me it was broadcast in the US and French Polynesia simultaneously. By now, it will have been shown in Europe with the morning news, and he mentioned something about a u tube that allowed people on the internet to watch it. I'm not totally certain what that meant, and it's probably not a big number, but the idea is that the world knows about us now, Kate. They had to for me to be sure we were safe."

"But how does that affect where we go from here, Rick? The Marquesas sound more manageable than Papeete, to me. It'd be much easier with the kids."

"It might at first, but someone will figure out where we are. We have to tell the American Embassy, so we can work on getting the necessary papers. Ari'i lives on Nuku Hiva. I've only been there a couple of times, when I was working on the Iriata. It has an airport, although I was told it was small. But, just think about the chaos that would ensue once the press figures out where we are. They aren't equipped on that island to handle that kind of bedlam. It would be unpleasant and potentially dangerous."

"How would Papeete be any better?"

"Well, they have a much bigger police force, for one thing. Though, ultimately, I'm not sure the police will be all that involved. Apparently, the French government has already pledged to provide security and have even invited us to be housed on one of the bases there. That would provide an extra layer of protection from the hordes."

"I don't know, Rick. I think I'd feel more imprisoned if I were on a base. I'm surprised you'd be ok with it." She was absently tracing patterns on his skin, offering what little comfort she could. There was no doubt that prison had affected him—how could it not? She was truly amazed by what he'd suffered to protect them all.

"I'm not ok with any of it; I wish it weren't necessary to think about at all—we could just go live with Ari'i for a while and be able to introduce the kids to modern life at our own pace. But, we have to be realistic, too. Would I want to be sequestered on a military base? No, not after months in prison. But, I'll do it if I have to; if it's what's best for our family."

"I know you will," she whispered, kissing him again. "You've been through so much, it seems surreal to me. But I need to be as strong as you've been, when my first instinct is to run away."

"We'll do it together, Kate. We can do anything together—we've proved that over and over."

"Does it have to be on a base, though?"

"No, I imagine Afaitu could find us a hotel or house to rent. If the French are serious about offering us a security presence, we wouldn't have to be on a base. We'll just have to see how it shakes out."

"So, it seems that the Naval ship might be the best option? They could be here tomorrow as well?" She felt him tense again at the question.

"They might be able to be here tomorrow. There's another factor at play with the Naval ship, and it might interfere with when they could be here, not to mention whether we want to be on it."

"What do you mean by that?"

"They've been tasked with hunting down Grollet and bringing him back to Papeete to face justice. If they're successful, and let's face it—Grollet has few resources at this point—then he'd be on board as well."

Kate collapsed onto her back and stared, unseeing, into the dark ceiling. "Wow, that's—wow. Talk about a full fucking circle."

Rick reached across her body and stroked down her arm so he could entwine their fingers. "He'd be the one locked up, this time. The one who faces prison."

"I just don't know if I'm willing to put myself that close to him, or the kids."

Rick was silent, and she wondered what he was thinking. Perhaps he was anxious to get back to Papeete, but was afraid to tell her. She was about to speak when his harsh whisper broke the stillness.

"I've seen him, you know. Grollet. Had to shake his hand."

Kate's breath caught, not only at the words but the raw hurt and anger she could hear behind them.

"I didn't have a choice. We didn't have time to tell you this afternoon, but after Afaitu brought my mother to Nuutania, they essentially held a small press conference in the parking lot to announce who I was and that she was there to get me released. She begged him, through the media, to let me out. And it worked; by the next morning the press had descended on that little parking lot, and I was called out of my cell and told I was free to go. I cried when the bag containing all the possessions they'd seized from me was opened and I saw my wedding ring again. My mother took it from me, hung it around my neck and told me that you were out there, somewhere, waiting for me. It gave me the strength to get through the next few hours."

Kate's eyes welled up with a few tears of her own. She'd been devastated by his disappearance, by the stupid accident that had taken him from her. Yet, she'd had the kids. She'd still had their family. How much worse it must have been for him, with no one to love him. Locked away no better than a caged animal, knowing that the people in charge simply wanted him to disappear.

"I was sent to shower and shave. When I got back to the room where Afaitu and Mother were waiting, he came sauntering in. And I remember that he said something about being glad to see me again, and I had to lie through my teeth and answer back that I was happy to see him as well."

His voice, which had been a harsh whisper when he'd started speaking, had picked up in volume as he relived that day. Kate could feel his rigid muscles beneath her hand; feel his jagged breaths on her skin. She even thought she might hear his heart hammering away in its bony cage.

Or perhaps it was her own that she heard.

"I had to stand in front of those cameras with him and smile; pretend that there was no better man in the world than he for commuting my term. My term, when he'd been the one responsible for putting me there in the first place!"

Kate rubbed his chest, trying to calm him, but he was lost in the black void of his memory from that day. They'd shown a few clips of his release from prison in the montage that had been part of the Sixty Minutes broadcast that day, so she had some idea of what had happened.

"And then," he choked, "and then…I had to shake his hand. I had to touch that slimy snake that had tried to kill us both so long ago, and then tried to do it all over again when he had them throw me in jail. I can hardly remember what else I said, but I know all I was thinking about was how I was going to kill him if anything had happened to you or the kids. I had to touch him, when all I wanted, all I needed, was to find you."

She could feel his tears dripping on her skin, mixing with her own. Gathering him in her arms, they sobbed against each other until exhaustion gave way—but not before they'd exchanged a few gentle kisses and they'd both given thanks that the man who'd accidentally brought them together hadn't succeeded in permanently separating them.

He was being watched. He wasn't sure how he knew this, beyond the unsettled feeling in his stomach and the little hairs on the back of his neck standing up, but he was sure of the fact. He was under surveillance by an unknown force.

Friend or foe, he'd have to deal with it one way or another.

Peering to his side, he spotted them immediately. Two of them.

Though, to be honest, they didn't appear to be trying to hide from him. He was theirs to control: they knew it and he knew it. Wishing for a few more hours of autonomy was not in the cards.

He threw up his hands and stood up from the sand where he'd been sitting, staring forlornly at the saline lake. Wondering how long it would take to kill him if he drank from it.

If it would be an especially painful death.

At his core, he was a coward. Though his mouth was parched as dry as the Sahara, he had somehow resisted drinking from the tempting blue waters.

He'd spent the night terrified. Alone on this island—there might be some terrible predator out there, hunting him. It was so dark, he would never know it approached until its sharp teeth sunk into him.

In his more rational moments, he knew he was being ridiculous. After all, his own tourism department bragged about how there were no dangerous animals or insects in French Polynesia.

Still, perhaps some wickedly clawed jaguar had escaped off a ship that had foundered nearby. Or a tiger, off a circus boat.

His imagination had built the images from there, until he was paralyzed with fear, unable to move from the rotting floor of the rotting building he'd picked to spend this ghastly night within.

His guttural panting had contributed to his fluid loss, so when morning finally dawned, after what seemed like twenty terrifying hours, he was near crazed from thirst.

Though some might argue that he'd been crazed prior to being dehydrated.

Somehow, he'd found enough self-control to curb his desire for water until noon. Little did he realize that sitting on the beach with the lake right in front of him was flirting with danger.

The fact that he'd flung some perfectly ripe coconuts in anger into those tantalizing waters never registered more than a slight satisfaction at the splashes they made.

After all, he couldn't hear the sloshing of the coconut water inside when it impacted the lake so far away from him.

But now, just as he was approaching his breaking point and was ready to give in to the siren call of the beautiful blue waves calling him forward, he'd felt the eyes on him.

And though it was clear that he didn't know who they were, and thus they must not be friendly, he was still glad. For people meant water.

He'd give his left arm for a drink.

In the end, it only cost him a kingdom.

"Henri Grollet, you are under arrest by order of Nicholas Sarkozy, President of France. Please stand and come with us."

He was being watched. He wasn't sure how he knew this, beyond the unsettled feeling in his stomach and the little hairs on the back of his neck standing up, but he was sure of the fact. He was under surveillance by an unknown force.

Friend or foe, he'd have to deal with it one way or another.

Peering to his side, he spotted them immediately. Two of them.

Though, to be honest, they didn't appear to be trying to hide from him. He was theirs to control: they knew it and he knew it. Wishing for a few more hours of autonomy was not in the cards.

He threw up his hands and sat up from the bed. "What do you want, boys?"

"Daddy, Daddy, it's time to get up! I'm hungry!" Patrick squealed.

Rick groaned at the volume. He would have loved a few more hours of sleep.

Kate giggled next to him, though the traitor didn't bother to sit up. "Welcome home, Daddy."

"C'mon, Daddy. We need to go see if Salesi and them are all ok," Alex added.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," he said, stretching as he stood. It might have been for fewer hours than he was used to, but it had still been the best damn sleep he'd had in months. A few minutes in the arms of Kate was worth hours without her.

The boys ran ahead of him, pushing each other in their eagerness to get to the kitchen before the other. Rick turned back to Kate, who was still relaxed in their bed. The sight was more than enough to bring a large grin to his face.

"Are you going to get up today?"

"Oh, I don't know. I could go for a big, strong man feeding me while I lounged in bed."

"Ok, I'll send Salesi up after we eat, then." He ducked the pillow she threw, though it had been a half-hearted toss. "Seriously, anything you want to eat?"

"There should be plenty of eggs. It's Patrick's turn to gather them. Alex can go get more coconuts. You know what we like. Just make plenty, as I imagine those friends of yours can eat a lot."

"Got it. Lots of food."

"I was thinking we could kill some of the chickens for dinner. No need to conserve the population, after all."

"Hmm, I hadn't even thought about the chickens. Man, there's a lot to consider. Ok, I'll get breakfast going and after we need to start deciding what stays and what comes with us."

"I'll be down once Sarah has woken up and nursed. There's no rush, Rick. Even if we have a ship anchored off the island later today, they still have to wait for us. It's not like they're gonna leave without us."

"You're so wise, my lady," he murmured, leaning down to kiss her. "See you in a bit."

As he walked out of the house to join his waiting sons, he couldn't help but bounce a little. This was one of the happiest mornings of his life. He'd sacrificed his freedom to save them, at a cost he'd have paid in blood if needed.

It was a price he'd been willing to tender, but perhaps unfathomable to those who lived without the love that poured out of his soul.