You love it don't complain

We spend some of the day out of his house, Matty drives us too our local shopping centre. On a ploy to get lunch, Italian to be precise in a small cafe that he swears is the best for food. He's right of course.

Walking around the shops I realise it would be wise to get myself a few essentials like underwear seen as I'm heading out with him later. He looks at each piece I pick and grins cheekily.

"White would look good on you" he says. I bag the white underwear set, it has white hold ups not sure when I will wear them but they come with it.

Just then my phone beeps, it's Rhea. She's texted me back about the party.

'fancy dress angel? That is def you, make it a slutty one lol. I'll be a devil xxx'

I mention it to Matty. He's had a message from Ross and Ryan too.

"If you go, I'll go with you babe" he sounds resigned

Okay, not an overly positive response, I leave it at that and concentrate on the rest of today.

"I'm gonna grab some outfit ideas while were here"

I pick a super short white square neck bodycon dress, nude heels as I'm getting so much more confident wearing them. I'll get some dress up stuff in Ann summers I decide to complete my "slutty angel" look.

I even see a perfect black dress for tonight which I bag.

We head back to the car. He buys food from the shop and asks me what snacks I like, which I find undeniably cute. He gets my chocolate and some drinks to take back with us and of course tobacco.

By the time we get back it's late enough to begin getting ready for tonight.

Having showered I borrow Kim's hair dryer and styling tools to do my hair, I even put some serum in it and it looks amazing. I make a note of the serum and decide to get some of my own. I had some lipstick in my bag from our date and I topped up on some makeup supplies when we went out earlier. I use them and go for a minimal yet pretty look. I leave the makeup on Matty's side, I hope he doesn't mind.

It makes me wonder, what are we doing here? I decide it's something to just go along with and see how it all turns out. I don't want to corner him and end up scaring him at the same time.

I'm deciding between my new dress or some skinny jeans when he pops his head into the room.

"Ohhh I think you should go like that" he laughs clearly finding himself funny as I'm standing there in my new black underwear.

"What I mean it" he protests laughing

He strides over to me, he's just had his own shower his hair is still wet and he's just wearing his boxers.

Not sure that I've ever found any man this attractive before.

He swoops his arms around me and goes to unhook my bra.

"We're supposed to be getting dressed not the other way, not sure if you know how this works?" I tease him yet I can't resist his touch.

He's so quick he has it undone and his hands on me within seconds.

"You love it. Don't complain" he says. I can't deny how much I love him touching me.

We stay like that for a few minutes, I look up at him.

"I hope your mum likes me" I say feeling suddenly nervous.

"I'm not confident or forward like other girls and I just hope she likes me" I explain.

"Firstly, I know she will like you. Also you're the only girl I've introduced to her okay? This is a first for me too. You're gorgeous, if anything she will most likely be so shocked that you're willingly hanging around with a guy like me" he laughs.

" a guy like you? What do you mean" I ask, he's just standing holding on to me now.

"Look I'm not a pretty college boy, I'm a bit rough around the edges" he laughs back.

"You really see yourself like that?" I ask him.

"Babe I'm shocked you're still here. I thought you would have realised by this point and up and left to find a clean cut, intelligent boy." He says running his hands through his hair which has dried perfectly of course.

I can't believe he doesn't value himself or even see himself for who he is. I'm truly baffled when I first met him I thought it was a case of him thinking he was too good but in reality actually it's the opposite.

"Matty you know you're like a cut above the rest of all other guys right? I'm not just saying that. I thought when I first met you that you were stand offish because you knew just how good looking and hot you were" I say to him.

"I'm proud to be hanging out with you Matty" I say and leave it at that.

He pulls me into him. It feels great. He just holds onto me without speaking. I turn my head to fit into his neck and kiss him there.

"I mean it Matty I'm not just saying that".

He pauses for a second sighing.a

"I haven't been a good guy before to any girls I've seen, I don't think I deserve you. You're honest and so so talented Taylor and I'm just being real with you could be with any guy you like. And not just that you're going to have so many opportunities in life. Im just a guy that can sort of draw" he laughs

"I don't want you to feel disappointed when you realise I'm not who you thought I was" he says looking at me.

Instantly I'm so annoyed with him and I fight to defend him.

"Don't write yourself off like that" I say looking at him into his green eyes.

"You're a catch, I feel like I need to slap myself to check this is really happening that you're going out with me" I laugh. Maybe I shouldn't have said going out with me, eek. It just tumbled out before I could stop myself.

"You would actually exclusively go out with me?" He asks, seriously.

I suddenly feel really self conscious, maybe I've said the wrong thing. I didn't want to make him define our relationship if that's what this is.

"Honestly I would Matty" I say simply and brace myself for his response. He'll probably laugh.

He searches my eyes with his, for a moment looking at me incredulously.

"You don't have to say anything back" the words tumble out of my mouth, I'm trying to reduce the damage here.

"It's all good" I smile trying to be reassuring.

***Matty's POV***

Time is elapsing and I do need to say something. Anything.

"Babe, I would be honoured to see you and to be with you" I say to her, feeling so scared and vulnerable for the first time ever in my life.

She has so much control over me it's unreal.

This is happening so fast, I haven't had any relationships before, she has with Tom. But I do not have anything to compare this too. I feel like I'm stumbling in the dark navigating my feelings and what her expectations might be. What is too soon? How do I let her know I like her without being too keen or pushing her away? There's so much to consider.

She's standing in my arms, her head tucked into my chest. I love her being there, feeling her skin touching mine. I lower my arms down her back. I'm just going to wait to see what she says next. I kiss the top of her head, I'm never ever this affectionate to any girls.

"That means a lot to me" she says finally.

"I just want you to know I didn't say all that stuff to force you into any kind of decision about me" she says insecurely.

I want to make her happy, I have never had these kind of intentions with a girl.

Impulsively I lift her up and place her on my bed. She leans back and I kiss her passionately. They say love takes you by surprise, it's all encompassing and uncontrollable. Above all else it's disarming.