Unremarkable & Meaningless

After almost eighteen boring years of life, high school student Yamagata Kyo had achieved so little. His only notable achievement was his first and only ever relationship, but even that only lasted 5 months and recently ended because of his own wrongdoings. His father always told him shitty advice that got him into the worst places in his life, one of those being his breakup, and now Kyo lives with, not only trust issues, but also a deadpan attitude and uncaring outlook towards many aspects of life. He wasn't out of shape, but he also wasn't in shape; He wasn't unpopular, but he also wasn't popular; he wasn't unintelligent, but he also wasn't very smart. There was nothing remarkable about Yamagata Kyo whatsoever.

One week before his 18th birthday, Kyo got home from school as usual, at the same time as usual, saying nothing to his father who was sat on his recliner with a beer in hand, watching a generic action movie, as usual. Earlier that day, Kyo was faced with stares and whispers after his ex-girlfriend and her friend group had spread exaggerated and distorted lies about him around the school, mixed in with a few bits of truth for further humiliation. It didn't bother him, it only made him wonder "Why?", why go through the effort of keeping up a lie about someone you supposedly don't care for anymore, somebody that you also claimed to love in the past, "What could anyone possibly gain from that?" He had pondered in class that day.

Walking to his bedroom, Kyo heard a thud followed by "BOY!" shouted by his father, "Since you owe me, and you're up, quickly go to Momo's and get me another 12 pack will ya?" He passed off a demand as a question, as usual. Saying Kyo owed him, for whatever reason, as usual. Momo was an old acquaintance of Kyo's father, equally a single, alcoholic father. For the past few months, Kyo had typically been sent to his house to buy a case of beers from him to bring home to his father since he wasn't old enough to buy alcohol from a normal store. it was never Momo who answered the door, in fact, it would be safe to say that Momo didn't even know that Kyo bought from him as it were his daughter who answered. She was younger than Kyo, but not by too much, and she always had a gloomy expression. He never knew her name, because he never asked. Kyo only continued to willingly buy the beers for his father because he thought that the money he gave to the girl might have been the only thing paying for her meals and keeping her alive. He thought he cared for her in a way, but really, he just didn't want to feel indirectly responsible for her potential starvation, and was putting the minimum effort possible into his 'care' for the girl. If he truly cared, he would have gone out of his way to help, such as calling child protective services to save her from her environment. Kyo did not care, he didn't care about anything anymore. His idea of caring for others was built on minor self fulfilment and ways to prevent change that could inconvenience him further. Kyo was nothing. his life was nothing. His past, present and future amount and amounted to nothing, He was close to scum - and he realised none of it. He couldn't see past his own delusions. His life was practically set in stone to be meaningless.

Kyo walked to Momo's, as usual, knocking on the door, as usual, having to wait a short while before its answered, as usual. The daughter opened the door, as usual, but what wasn't usual was the black eye she had, coupled with tear marks down her face; yet she still brought the beers before even seeing it was Kyo, knowing that no one else would come to this house at this time. She put the beers on the front step, glanced up at Kyo with an even gloomier look on her face than usual, and gently shut the door. They didn't say a word to eachother, as usual - she had never spoken to him, and Kyo hadn't needed to speak to her for months since he only came there for the same reason each time, paying the same price for the same thing. This time was different than any other time, as Kyo stood there for a few seconds before knocking again. He didn't knock again out of concern for the girl, after seeing clear signs of abuse, but instead out of his false sense of duty. Maybe it was because of the circumstances of this occasion that the payment slipped both of their minds, but once Kyo realised it, he didn't consider just leaving as he was clouded by his self-enforced duty to 'help' the girl with the money he gives her - ironically, he hadn't thought about helping her in any other way, even after seeing her black eye. Kyo barely even acknowledged it.

Kyo waited and waited after knocking, yet there was no answer, so he knocked again, and again, and again, until he heard a loud thud from inside the house. Then there was some shouting, another bang and a thud, followed by more shouting, but Kyo couldn't make out what was being said. Finally there was a sound of footsteps coming to the door, but they were much heavier than usual. Momo opened the door, clearly heavily intoxicated and angry. He was a large man in both height and weight, a complete contrast to his daughter. He glared at Kyo and then looked at the beers on the front step, before shoving Kyo to the ground. "If you EVER show your FUCKING face here again, I'll KILL YA!" Momo shouted at Kyo, who was shocked more than anything else. As Momo was picking his beers back up, Kyo sat up and looked inside their house. His heart dropped. In the doorway between the living room and the corrdior lay Momo's Daughter, unconscious surrounded by blood. Shaking, Kyo looked up at Momo who was walking back inside and noticed his bloody hands; glancing down at his coat where he was shoved, there were bloody handprints. Ig was her blood. "Did he kill her?" Kyo thought, sitting there in a panic, "Did i cause this?", he touched his face, noticing his expression had drastically changed, unusually. "Why did this happen?", Kyo stumbled out of the property.

Kuramoto Shizuka, Aged 15, was killed at the hands of her father, Kuramoto Momo, that night. She was beaten to death after her abusive, drunken father woke up to knocks on the door and a case of his beers missing, concluding that Shizuka was giving them away, which led to his outburst of abuse that left Shizuka unconscious, never to wake again. She bearly made a sound, even when being beaten to death by her own father, she only at curled up in fear, silently crying, waiting for it to end. Yamagata Kyo was the only witness to the crime.

When Kyo got home, his father was asleep on his recliner, as usual. His reason to go and buy those beers in the first place was always meaningless. His father would always fall asleep in the time it took for Kyo to go get the beers, knowning this, Kyo's only real reasons for even going in first place was to avoid any hassle and to fulfil his false sense of duty to Momo's daughter. None of that mattered anymore.

Kyo didn't sleep that night.

The next day was another school day. From one hell to another, Kyo walked there, passing by Momo's house on the way. It were as normal. No police cars or investigations taking place. He was the only one who knew of the crime at this moment in time. Yet he said nothing, passing by the house with a troubled look on his face. Kyo was changed by what he saw that night, but not enough for him to report the crime. He was scared, or at least that was his excuse, as he blamed himself.

At school, he barely noticed that he was being made fun off the same as he were the day before. Kyo was too focused on nothing, staring blankly out the window, thinking of almost nothing.

"I wonder if the police will be there when i walk home" is the only thing he considered, in the manor that they would have be at his door waiting for him, not at Momo's. He believed he deserved as just punishment as Momo himself did. Kyo was willing to accept that, if it were to happen, as he thought it was his duty to pay for his actions, or lack there of.

When he passed Momo's house on. the way home, there was still no sign of the body being found, nor were there any police at the Yamagata house. It took 3 days for Shizuka's body to be found. It was exactly where Kyo saw it. Momo drank himself to death that night, he died in the sofa a few feet away from his daughter that he'd just murdered, Kyo was made aware of this on the news in the morning after the bodies were found.

Kyo didn't go to school that day.

He didn't feel like going to school for a while.

A long while.

His father didn't care, he briefly tried to get Kyo to go into school at the beginning but ultimately wasn't bothered, they left eachother alone. Kyo would only leave his room to use the bathroom or get food at night when his father was asleep. He spent his 18th birthday rotting in his bed. This was how he lived day by day for a year. He didn't feel like doing anything else.

Filled with blame and regret, Kyo was changing for the worse. It had been a long time since he'd last smiled. The deep depression he was in had him lying in bed most of the time, finding comfort in watching movies and anime, playing fantasy games and listening to music.

Sometimes he wished he was in those worlds instead of his own.

He hated himself and what he had become, but he couldn't change. He didn't have the will to make a change.

Kyo had realised during his reclusive year just how little he mattered. No one came to check on him after the first week, not his father, not anyone else. It was like he didn't exist. The only implication that his existence was being acknowledged was his father still buying enough food for two. His mother left when he was young, she couldn't handle being a teenage mother, but his father didn't want him either. "At least he stayed." Kyo used to think to himself, using it as an excuse to justify the way his father treated him.

By the time it came to be one year since the incident, Kyo felt the same guilt he felt on that day all over again.

He didn't eat that day.

He didnt do anything that day.

Alongside this return guilt, however, was finally a desire to change, but Kyo felt as though he were missing the opportunity to re-integrate back into normal society.

So he waited.

He waited too long.

Kyo had noticed that he hadn't heard or seen his father whatsoever in a few days. The fact that the food in the house was no longer getting replenished backed up the fact that he was gone. Kyo decided to actually explore his house properly for the first time in a while.

There was no trace of his father.

He had packed up and left.

All the desire in Kyo to change had diminished. Now everyone and everything had abandoned him. The only things his father left behind, surprisingly, were a 12 pack of beers that Kyo wouldn't have dared to touch, a half-empty carton of cigarettes and a lighter. There was so little food in the house, yet these remained. Kyo smoked and drank for the first time in his life that night. He wanted to feel something, and even when he did, he didn't stop until he'd drank every last beer and smoked every last cigarette. He was ready to pass out - not the best time to go outside for the first time in a year.

Kyo did it anyways.

He stumbled outside, reeking of what he had just consumed, barely even thinking at all.

He subconsciously walked to the Kuramoto house, he lurked outside, it was empty, up for sale. He couldn't help himself. The laughter came out of nowhere and wouldn't stop, it turned from laughter to tears, from tears to screaming, punching the floor while on his knees, grasping his head, he felt like he was losing his mind.

Kyo found himself lying in the middle of the road, staring at the stars in the sky. A truck came. It stopped just in time. The driver got out and looked at Kyo, he was talking to him, probably asking if he was alright, but Kyo wasn't listening, he just stared at the man. He only thought of the video games he loved to play so much, he missed them. The man got Kyo into the passenger seat and was taking him to the hospital.

Kyo just accepted anything at this point. Staring out the window on the motorway, he saw the truck fly by someone. In that moment, it was as though time slowed down for Kyo, and he saw Kuramoto Shizuka, stood on the side of the road.

In reality, there was nothing there.

But Kyo knew no different.

Seemingly out of nowhere to the driver, Kyo unbuckled the seatbelt, opened the door and chucked himself out of the truck, right into the next lane on the motorway road. Ignoring the pain, Kyo looked up to where he saw the girl, crawling towards it, but there was nothing there. Once he'd realised it, there were already two bright lights headed straight for him, and they weren't slowing down.

Yamagata Kyo was found deceased as a result of vehicular manslaughter in the early morning of his 19th birthday. He didn't have a funeral.