Her Darkest Times

Chapter with trigger warning: Mention of suicidal.

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Her life was shattered by the news. Her beloved person was gone. The only protection she got. The only person who would always love her unconditionally is now gone. It's been a week and Grace couldn't leave her bed. She had no family again. All her uncles and aunties tried to put their hands on Arthur's wealth instead tried to hug her . 

After the burial, they didn't even take a glance at Grace. Everything they said was about the division of property. Arthur had not yet drawn up his will. There was no legal record of who would inherit his wealth. Grace herself didn't know what to do. Like a ship that had lost its captain, Grace could only stand still on the waves of the sea. Waiting for the waves to take her where they will.

Her eyes were still swollen. Her head felt dizzy because she hadn't eaten all day. Grace walked weakly to the refrigerator and saw a tomato. It was the last tomato. There was nothing else. She saw how messy her life had become.

As for Agnes and Fillo... they had gotten engaged. They got engaged on the day Grace had to bury her father. They were happy on top of Grace's sadness. The girl bit her lip. She squeezed the tomato in her hand until it broke.

Arthur Norma's death was sudden. The local police said it was a suicide attempt. But Grace didn't believe it. It couldn't have happened. Her father couldn't have done that when just hours before he had said he would live with her forever. To always live happily.

But Grace was troubled. She contacted her family's lawyer and he too said that they couldn't do anything because it was in another country's jurisdiction. 

All day Grace just screamed and swore at everyone. It was the first time she had ever cursed anyone. The family lawyer could only help Grace by bringing Arthur's body back to New York to be buried close to his family, his wife.

On the same day, big news broke. The daughters of the Ambrose family had gotten engaged in the Maldives. Grace seeing Agnes and Fillo's faces in the newspaper made her feel sick.

And then her aunt and uncle showed up. They had only come to offer their condolences and then in the living room of her house, they impolitely argued for the title to Arthur's house and some of his wealth.

"I can't go on like this. I have to do something."

Grace, who had lost a lot of energy, almost fainted, straightened up her body. Fortunately, her family's lawyer arrived at the same time. He helped her to sit on the sofa. A also brought some food because he knew Grace's condition was devastating after being left by Arthur suddenly.

"Sir Clark, I'm an adult now. I'm twenty-one years old. I want to legalize my name for my father's wealth and property. Can that still be done? Before uncle and aunt gnaw on it all."

Clark Tomlinson was one of Arthur Norma's close friends. He was trusted to be her family lawyer. And now the mansion was occupied by just one girl. And it was being fought over by many people.

"I will do my best, Grace. I won't betray Arthur's precious trust. Once you get it, what will you do?" Clark asked.

"I intend to sell it. This house... it's too big for me alone. And I'll probably leave New York when it's all over."

"Where? All your family is in New York."

"I don't know, but I don't want to see my uncle and aunt anymore. I want a quiet life. Just like I've always wanted, so that I can live happily. And the first step is to leave New York."

It's just too crowded. Everyone always wants to visit New York. They say New York is the perfect place to fulfill the American dream. But after growing up in this metropolis, Grace began to feel a sense of emptiness. There was no longer any reason for her to stay.

Agnes and Fillo were here. The Babel family business was here too. Her greedy uncle and aunt were here. Everything would only be toxic to Grace if she stayed here.

Thinking about it made Grace feel sick. The girl held her mouth to stifle the nausea that rushed through her.

"Excuse me, Sir Clark."

Grace walked quickly to the kitchen where she vomited the contents of her stomach into the sink. Nothing came out because Grace hadn't eaten since yesterday. She had only filled her stomach with a piece of bread and milk. After that she chose to sleep all day drowning her sorrows.

Her mouth tasted bitter. Her stomach also became painful as it was forced to expel non-existent contents. Her dizziness was getting more intense.

"Grace? Are you okay?" asked Clark who felt sorry for the girl. He also had a young daughter. Seeing Grace endure alone made him think of his daughter and it hurt his own heart.

"Do you want to go to the hospital?" asked Mr. Clark as he got the girl some water.

Grace shook her head. "I'm just going to rest and eat."

The morning sickness kept her up for the next few days. She had no one else to help her. Mr. Clark himself only came by occasionally to inform Grace of the legalities of her father's estate.

Mr. Clark came again to inform her that her uncle had volunteered to take care of Grace but Grace refused because she didn't need a guardian now. She's twenty-one years old. And they tried to take the route of saying Grace was mentally unwell and still needed a guardian to protect her.

"Are they crazy! I'm not mentally ill! I'm fine!" Grace shouted in frustration.

Clark nodded.

"Calm down, Grace. We just need to show you your medical papers. We'll make an appointment with the doctor. For now please take good care of your health, okay? If you need anything then you can call me."

Grace plopped herself on the sofa. She was exhausted. She needed a rest from all of this. Her body was getting thinner and her morning sickness was getting worse. If her father was still around… maybe he had already called the doctor since her first morning… sickness?

Morning sickness? Wasn't it one of the symptoms of being pregnant? Grace tried to calculate her period. Last month she didn't get her period. Maybe because she was too stressed by her situation. And this month too… 

Shoot. Shoot. Shoot. Stupid. Foolish. What a fool.

Grace slapped her head a few times. No protection. How was she so reckless? Her hand was shaking. Shetrie to grab her phone and called Clark but she put it down again. Who would she contact at this kind of time? Her relatives? No way, they would use this situation to make her sign the guardianship.

No no no no. She needed to confirm it herself.

Grace quickly grabbed her jacket. She bought various kinds of testpack.

She had always been a religious girl. Her grip on her cross necklace was getting tighter and tighter. Waiting patiently for all the testpack revealed the result.

Graces chatted some kind of prayer. She wished it was all her sickness for being depressed this past few weeks. She hoped she was infertile instead or maybe Gabriel too was a barren man. She hoped for all the bad things to happen but the two lines on the various kinds of the testpack she bought showed her that her prayer didn't work.

"Ah… what should I do now?"

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