25| silent

Damon

"Oh no here we go again, fighting over what I said, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Bad at love? No I'm not good at this,"- Demi Logs to, Tell me you love me.

***

"Why do you always think I'm lying?!" I yelled and luckily no one was at home at all today. We were grateful that no one was home, otherwise they would've heard everything. Or maybe even nothing. We would've bottled it up all inside. Which would've far worse.

I was hurt that she actually thought I was lying about what I felt and my truths. It hurt that she didn't believed that I loved her, I loved every part of her. I loved her despite hurting her a number of a times. I knew I didn't deserve her.

"Because that's just what I see! And because that's what you have shown me. When I have you the opportunity to actually be with me you never took it. You never even gave a reason. You could've told me why and it would've been easier for me to make peace with that. But instead, you just tell me things but you never show. And if you do show, you go all bipolar and I'm supposed to fucking figure you out. How am I even supposed to figure you out when you don't even let me in? You don't tell me anything you just simply shut up. Tell me how an I supposed to deal with that? Where's the communication. If you loved me that  much, you'd do that for me. For us. But because of you, there is no us. And you just have to pay for own mistake,"

"Melinoe-"

"You've lost me Damon." My heart beat was racing and by the second, It did feel like I was losing her. And I couldn't take it because I didn't want to lose her. I didn't know what I'd do if I'd lose her because of my stupid self.

"You have already lost me." She bit out. "By being a coward." Her retort was felt like daggers inside  of me and I didn't know how I still standing. I could see the pain in her bloodshot eyes, her anger and sadness were clouding my favorite pair of eyes and it was all because of me. Me and my stupidity. I needed to hear those words, no matter how many times they hurt me. I've probably hurt her far worse. I needed to hear them, let then sink in and think of the person I am.

"You'll lose me." She stepped forward. "Just like I  lost  a baby that had a baby," I heard her say

"-what?"

"It had been living in me for almost two months and I had already grown fond of him. He was still growing, I was ready to take care of him for mine months without any body knowing but all he got was too survive was 8 weeks."

"Melinoe-"

"And it was a baby, my baby that had your DNA."

Silence crept in. The only noise I could hear, was the one my heart was making and it almost felt like she could hear it.

I was still busy trying to process what she had just told me. A baby?

My baby?

"Our baby Eli?" I looked up to her with hot tears, waiting to be released. "Our baby," I whispered back and it was like a moment of realization. I began inhaling and exhaling heavily as it felt like I was running out air.

It was our baby.

"What happened to him?" I asked. "I miscarried,"

"When?"

"Just a few hours ago," my heart dropped and it felt like I was being deprived of oxygen. So that had meant that I was close to him. He was right in front of me and I didn't get the chance to even see him. How I had the opportunity but I never connected with him in any way.

But one thing was still on my mind.

A few hours ago she miscarried... That had meant that- our argument. Nichola rushed her out of the room and my eyes caught a sight of blood but I thought it was something else. "I'm sorry," I choked out.

I dropped down on my knees and hugged her legs. Which she was now dressed in a pajama pants as I cried. "I'm a murderer. It was all my fault! It was all me and I'm sorry!" I roared.

"I'm so, so, so sorry. His not here because of me. Melinoe forgive me," I didn't hear anything for her. But I felt a pair of arms engulf me in a hug and I matched her actions, crying on her shoulder. "Let it all out," I heard her say and I felt a hot tear of her own make contact with my skin.

And we just grieving and crying together.

I didn't know how long we had sat there in each other's arms but it was what I missed. I would've wanted nothing more than for her as the mother of my kids. "Forgive me,"

"Shh," she put a finger on my lip. "It wasn't your fault. Everything happens for a reason and this is no different. You can always be a father, just not the father of mine." Once again it was like she was killing me slowly.

But then the next thing she did, surprised me. Her soft lips connected with mine and I immediately responded back. Our lips moved in sync as I cupped her cheek, only to feel the wet spot that had her tears. I didn't stop feeling the hot liquid and she seemed like she didn't realize it.

Her hands gripped my hair softly as she deepened the kiss. Her warm tongue made contact with mine. But we kept it at a slow pace, that until she pulled away slowly.

Her eyes were still closed as I caught her biting her lip before her eyes fluttered open once again. I finally came into contact with her those beautiful hazel green orbs, my favorite pair from my favorite person.

"But I'll always love you,"