Ch.212: Unable to be Perfect; A Heart Filled with Regrets

The mirror reflected was what was on the other side of the wall. On the other side, Yin Yu shook Quan Yizhen vigorously.

"Wake up, wake up?"

Quan Yizhen finally came to and mumbled semi-consciously, "Shihong, who bea me uh jus now? Wha sih ye?"

… Poor Qi Ying, he was so bruised up his speech was now unclear, and Xie Lian felt sympathy in spite of himself.

"Do you think I could've beaten you?" Yin Yu asked.

Quan Yizhen scratched his head, and only then did he seem to recall. "Oh, ih was the emperer who bea me uh." Then, as if he suddenly remembered something, he became pumped-up again. "He snach away your shovo, do you wan me to hel snach ih back?"

"Do you think you can beat him…" Yin Yu asked.

Xie Lian finally figured it out. This was the Palace of Qi Ying.

It seemed Yin Yu was captured by Jun Wu when he came to look for Quan Yizhen.

Jun Wu had circled back to behind his person, and Xie Lian used the chance to lower his head and mouth soundlessly, "Lord Wind Master, are you still there?"

However, it wasn't Shi Qingxuan who responded, but Jun Wu. Jun Wu said from behind him, "Of course not."

"…"

Jun Wu said, "I suddenly remembered that the barrier locking the Heavenly Capital seemed to have leaks. So I've only just barred the Soul-Shifting Spell too."

"…"

Jun Wu patted his shoulder and said amicably, "And to think, it was I who taught you the Soul-Shifting Spell back then. Xianle has been making practical usage of all the things I've taught you, I'm very pleased."

Then, he left. It didn't take long before Jun Wu's figure showed up inside that mirror.

Quan Yizhen was the first to notice. "!"

Yin Yu also whipped around and called out in alarm, "My Lord?!"

Quan Yizhen jumped to his feet ready to fight, but with only a wave of Jun Wu's hand, Quan Yizhen was smacked back onto the futon, and the entire futon collapsed. Quan Yizhen fell back to the ground, his head lolled and he lost consciousness again.

Yin Yu was extremely guarded. However, Jun Wu said, "No need to be so tense. Think of it this way: even if you're on guard it'd be pointless, so why not relax a bit?"

That was certainly true. Yin Yu didn't know what to say and could only smile awkwardly as he had always done, but then it was quickly withdrawn. Jun Wu, on the other hand, appeared to be relaxed and at ease.

"My dear Yin Yu, I don't think I've ever chatted with you like this before in the past, am I right?"

Yin Yu replied cautiously, "…That seems to be the case."

In the past, while he was the martial god that ruled the west, his believer-base wasn't strong, his merits were few, and his rank wasn't high. Even though he wasn't the lowest of the heavenly officials in the Upper Court, he was probably still below average, so he had practically no chances to be near the one highest in the Upper Court, the Heavenly Martial Emperor. In the past, he was probably nervous even if Jun Wu was just passing by the entrance of his palace. Now, he was even more nervous.

He added, "But there are many heavenly officials I've never conversed with before in the first place, and those who didn't know of me."

However, Jun Wu replied, "That's not necessarily true. There are many who know you. Even if they've never met you before, they know of you."

Yin Yu was taken aback. "Really?"

"Because many know of your shidi," Jun Wu said. "And when your shidi is mentioned, the subject of you would often be raised. The one that's a foil."

Those were extremely piercing words. While it was only a colourless description without any emotion, it was precisely because the one describing it was objective, and was only speaking the truth, which made it sting more. Quan Yizhen was still dizzy, not yet back to his senses, and Yin Yu hung his head low, clenching his fists.

Xie Lian could vaguely guess what Jun Wu was planning.

It was a good while before Yin Yu gathered his courage. "My Lord, what do you want? You're already the Heavenly Martial Emperor, nothing can bar you, the greatest martial god of the three realms, no one can shoulder your position. So why are you doing this? Just…what do you want?"

Of course, Jun Wu didn't answer him. He said abruptly, "Yin Yu, do you want to return to the Upper Court?"

"What?!"

Xie Lian was also surprised by this question. What was Jun Wu planning? What was the meaning in coaxing Yin Yu to change sides at a time like this???

"I don't think you actually like being a mere errand boy in the ghost realm in the lower world?"

"…"

Yin Yu finally snapped to. "My Lord thinks too much. Like or dislike, there's not a choice to begin with."

Xie Lian cried "oh no" mentally. "You can't answer like that. Now he'll probably find your weak point!"

Sure enough, Jun Wu gave a small smile. "Did you know that if you answer like this, what you actually mean is 'I dislike it; I'd rather not talk about it.'"

"…"

Indeed. If Yin Yu really felt confident, and if he really liked his current position in the ghost realm, he would've responded with "I like it very much" directly. Yet in avoiding being straightforward, his answer was instead very obvious.

Jun Wu continued, "You've come from a renowned household, an orthodox clan that never traversed the path of evil. You were raised and grew up in the sect, and were told since you were young that to ascend was the ultimate goal in life. A pursuit such as this is very difficult to give up. To fall to the ghost realm could only be said to be a forced situation, an act borne of helplessness. Of course you're not able to say you're satisfied with your current position in the ghost realm, because it wasn't what you wanted in the first place."

Indeed Yin Yu didn't have enough confidence, and said weakly, "Chengzhu has shown me grace, he saved me…"

"I know," Jun Wu said. "He even helped you pacify and send off the resentful spirit of Jian Yu, who died during banishment, am I right?"

"…Yes," Yin Yu said. "So whether I'm satisfied with the current position, it's all…"

"That's dissatisfaction," Jun Wu said. "You are bound by his grace and had nowhere to go, so you are only forcing yourself."

"…"

Yin Yu hung his head and didn't speak. Xie Lian was breaking out in a cold sweat.

He could now somewhat guess how Jun Wu planned to attack, and Yin Yu's every expression, every gesture, from head to toe, was full of weakness!

"Then," Jun Wu said. "Let's turn this around. Let me ask you another question: have you shown Quan Yizhen any grace?"

"…"

Jun Wu continued, "On what basis must you place yourself in a dissatisfactory position, to devote yourself and repay kindness, when someone irrelevant shows you grace, but when you showed Quan Yizhen grace, he made you fall this low?

"Yin Yu, to belittle yourself in order to help others is no good habit. You must know, no one will thank you."

He was pushing on with every step, and each step was trampling where Yin Yu hurt the most!

Jun Wu then continued, "You've spent your entire life desiring to ascend. You desired a good position in the Upper Court, and to join the ranks within the Great Martial Hall. Even after Quan Yizhen made you such an embarrassment—his background accessory, the joke of the heavens—you still endured it and struggled to remain in the Heavenly Capital. Wasn't that because you wanted to stay here?

"You belong here, but Quan Yizhen made a mess of everything, and easily robbed away everything that should've been yours.

"Who does he think he is?

"Have you not given as much as him? No, you've given more than he did. And. When it comes to overall ability, he might not even compare. How come Qi Ying is now alone, with neither aid nor support, in the Upper Court? Because his mind is simple; ignorant and dumb, blunt and savage, he's unable to have anyone respect him. But you. Your mind and wisdom are much

more mature than his, you know the ways of the world better than him, you know when to charge and when to withdraw, and are more willing to put in an effort. If you had his natural talent, his spiritual powers, then your achievements would be many, many times greater than his, and all would respect you."

Yin Yu was starting to grow restless. "I'm not understanding why My Lord is saying all this. All 'ifs' are meaningless, his spiritual powers are his…" Suddenly, he screamed and raised his own hand, crying in alarm. "WHAT?! WHAT IS THIS??"

Pure white spiritual light suddenly burst from one of his hands, so blinding it couldn't be looked at directly.

Jun Wu appeared apathetic and said, "No need to be afraid, it's just a bit of spiritual power."

Only then did Yin Yu calm down a little, and he said in disbelief, "Whose spiritual powers? …Mine? I'm not this…"

His spiritual powers weren't that strong.

"It's not yours yet," Jun Wu said. "But whether it will become yours will depend on what you choose."

Yin Yu exclaimed, "If it's not mine, then whose is it?? Could it be…"

Someone instantly came to mind, and he looked over. Coincidentally, Quan Yizhen, whose lifeforce was stubbornly strong, also became conscious again, looking dumbfounded. It seemed he was confused again.

Jun Wu replied, "That's correct. This is Quan Yizhen's spiritual power."

"Huh?" Quan Yizhen gaped.

"Why are his spiritual powers inside me?" Yin Yu questioned. "How can spiritual powers be transferred like this?? How is this possible???"

"Even fate can be switched, so why not spiritual powers?" Jun Wu said. "There are many things that aren't as difficult as you think. It's only a matter of some words and some brush strokes from great heavenly officials, that's all."

Yin Yu shuddered. "This…THIS…!!"

He tossed his hands as if he wanted to toss away some scalding hot yam, but that forcefully-strong spiritual power leapt happily on his hand, blasting wherever his fingers pointed, and abruptly, an entire row of walls inside the Palace of Qi Ying were blown apart by him. The divine

statue collapsed, and the roof was almost going to cave in. Yin Yu became even more shocked and didn't dare to toss his hand randomly anymore.

Jun Wu smiled. "Don't be nervous, take your time, just keep it under control."

Yin Yu held that hand with his other hand, shaken and terrified, both his arms trembling.

Jun Wu said, "Yin Yu, let me ask you again. Do you wish to return?"

Yin Yu panted a few breaths, his eyes red with blood, and he gazed over.

Jun Wu said, "If you wish to return, not only can I help you remove the cursed shackle, I can also transfer all of Quan Yizhen's spiritual powers to you."

Quan Yizhen seemed to never have thought this kind of evil spell existed, and his entire person was dumbstruck.

Xie Lian exclaimed dumbfoundedly, "??? ARE YOU CRAZY??!!"

Jun Wu said slowly, "And from now on, there will never be another who only knows of Qi Ying but not of Yin Yu. Who would dare not to remember your name? Nevermore will there be anyone."

Yin Yu stumbled a few steps back, his mind jumbled. "I…I…I…"

Xie Lian was so high-strung and tense he'd even forgotten he was still tied onto the chair by Ruoye. He held his breath, his hands gripped the chair, his body leaning forward.

There was one thing Jun Wu wasn't wrong about. Xie Lian could tell too. Deep in Yin Yu's heart, he looked up to the heavens more. He had belonged to the Upper Court in the first place. This was something that was planted deep within his mind, hard to change.

And, did Yin Yu really have not a single resentful thought towards Quan Yizhen?

He couldn't be sure.

Between those with so much that had happened between them, it was completely impossible to utter the words "I don't hate you" so easily. This "hatred" could be big or small, and Yin Yu wasn't a determined character; what he wanted to do was probably greatly influenced by those around him. Since they hadn't been well-acquainted, Xie Lian couldn't be sure either just what Yin Yu would do, and could only pray silently in his mind.

Your Highness Yin Yu…watch out!

"I…I…"

Yin Yu was going out of his mind for a long while, and he sat down, covering his face with his hands. A moment later, he finally looked up, and his eyes also grew cold and somber.

He stared at Quan Yizhen, who had been beaten to a pile of trash, for a long time before whispering, "…My Lord, are you, really…able to give me all of his spiritual powers?"

Xie Lian's heart sank while Quan Yizhen gaped, his mouth wide open. "…Shixiong?"

"Why don't I give them to you now, so you can see for yourself whether I am able," Jun Wu said.

Yin Yu still seemed to be concerned and asked, "Then…can he still steal them back? They're his own spiritual powers after all, so if he wanted to steal them back…"

"Unless you yourself are willing to return them to him, or unless you die, then it would be impossible for him to steal them back," Jun Wu said.

Yin Yu hesitantly asked, "Then if his spiritual powers are transferred to me, will Quan Yizhen…die? Or would something else happen…"

No matter what, he probably still didn't want Quan Yizhen to die by his hands.

Jun Wu replied, "Nothing will happen, it's just the process that's a bit painful, that's all. But who hasn't suffered pain in this world? How you want to deal with him afterwards, whether he lives or dies, will be all up to you."

Yin Yu then asked, "What about the other heavenly officials? There's so many heavenly officials in the Upper Court who saw what happened at the Great Martial Hall, if it got out…"

Jun Wu smiled. "So what if they know? They're all ants that can be squished with but one hand. Annihilate them all, bring up a new batch of heavenly officials, change your face and your name, make up a new background; who would be the wiser?"

When he said this his expression was nonchalant, as calm and easy as if he was saying the tea in the cup had gone cold, to pour it out and change a new cup.

Finally, Yin Yu asked, "In the new Upper Court, me, what…would be my new identity?"

"Ling Wen is my left hand, and you shall be my right," Jun Wu said. "There will be no others above you besides me."

Yin Yu gritted his teeth, and finally, he said, "…Very well!"

Then he said darkly, "Pray My Lord will remember the promise made to me today. Then, now…"

He didn't continue, and only moved his gaze to Quan Yizhen.

Jun Wu replied, "As you wish."

The moment those words left his lips, Quan Yizhen suddenly started writhing. His face was twisting and he screamed, blood flowing from all of his orifices as he clutched his head and rolled around, seeming to be in great agony. As for Yin Yu, a sudden spiritual light emitted from his body.

His entire face was shining and illuminated, and he raised an arm, swinging it above; the entire Palace of Qi Ying collapsed with a rumble!

A giant hole appeared upon the golden palace. Standing among the wreckage, Yin Yu bowed his head to look at his hands, slowly clenching them into fists. Jun Wu's expression was like he was watching a small child playing with his new toy.

"How do you feel?"

It was a moment before Yin Yu replied, "…I've never possessed such strong powers before."

He gazed at Quan Yizhen, who was howling on the ground on the side, his expression complicated. "My master once said, Quan Yizhen was someone born to ascend, his ability gifted by the heavens. Is this the power bestowed by the heavens?"

"From now on, it's yours," Jun Wu said.

Yin Yu slowly nodded.

Then the next moment, he raised his palm and blasted.

This blast used all of Quan Yizhen's powers, its strength terrifying, and a white light erupted from the mirror. Soon after, Yin Yu drew a giant circle in the air with his right hand, then grabbed that circle from the air and hurled, trapping Jun Wu. Jun Wu looked at the circle of light around his feet, frowned slightly, seeming to be wary and cautious not to touch it. Then he looked at Yin Yu who was pulling at Quan Yizhen on the ground, appearing indifferent.

"Yin Yu, to renege at the last minute, are you not going to give me an explanation?"

"…"

Yin Yu had his back turned to him as he carried Quan Yizhen on his back, and didn't respond.

Jun Wu said, "What you're doing is certainly worthy of praise, a man of class. However, is this your true heart? You've endured and aggrieved yourself for hundreds of years, are you going to keep enduring?"

"…"

"Do you truly not resent the one you are saving right now? Even if you do not resent, do you not hate?"

"…"

Yin Yu finally couldn't take it anymore. He clenched his fists tight, his knuckles cracking, and he whipped around. "I DO RESENT HIM! I DO HATE HIM!!! BUT, SO WHAT??"

Quan Yizhen was flustered and ruffled, speaking as blood spewed from his nose and mouth, "Shixiong…"

"SHUT UP!!!" Yin Yu shouted.

He then turned to Jun Wu again. "My Lord…My Lord…YOU! WHY MUST YOU REMIND ME OF THIS?? SAYING IT LIKE YOU ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND ME OR SOMETHING?! YES, I HATE HIM! BUT, SO WHAT?? HE'S GIVEN ME SO MUCH TROUBLE, OF COURSE I HATE HIM??"

"…"

Xie Lian's sunken heart was suddenly thrown high from the deep valley once again, not knowing whether to laugh or cry, almost falling over. What kind of messed-up logic was this??

Then, Yin Yu continued, "…BUT…But I only…I only wanted to just hate him, it doesn't mean I have to hurt him. What's that 'should've been mine'? Other than natural talent, there is nothing that belongs to anyone from birth. OTHER PEOPLE'S POSSESSIONS, I DON'T WANT THEM!!"

Xie Lian's eyes lit up and he shouted, "WELL SAID!"

Yin Yu continued, "I do want to return to the heavens, I do want to be ranked in the top ten! BUT! If I didn't manage all that on my own, then it's completely meaningless! I'm unlucky, I accept it! If I'm not as powerful as him, then at the very least I can admit I'm not as powerful as him! ADMITTING THAT I CAN'T COMPARE IS NOT THAT HARD!"

Such pride!

In that instant, Xie Lian finally saw once again on Yin Yu that glorious shine and pride of his youth.

"WAH!" Quan Yizhen burst out in tears on his back. Blood mingled with tears and snot all spewed, splattering Yin Yu with a face full of it.

Yin Yu broke down, shouting, "STOP THAT!!!"

Quan Yizhen sobbed and moaned, "Shixiong, I'm sorry!"

Yin Yu couldn't endure it any longer. "You don't need to apologize to me anymore, either! Either way, you won't understand no matter how much you say sorry. I've really had enough of you…"

Jun Wu sighed and rubbed his temple.

Yin Yu added, "Besides…besides, I'm not completely useless either. You've said it yourself. When it came to overall abilities, he might not compare to me. I've got my own…"

Oof.

Jun Wu turned around and casually swept a hand. "Exhilarating. I imagine you and Xianle must get along very well."

…

What?

What happened?!

Xie Lian was still tied onto the chair, but his heart was pounding so hard it was going to jump out of his chest. What happened to Yin Yu?

He had stopped talking, and his expression also turned odd. As for Jun Wu, he rested his hands behind his back and calmly crossed over that seemingly-powerful circle of light, not feeling the restriction in the least.

"I had pretty much guessed that was how you would respond. So, I didn't remove your cursed shackle beforehand."

Cursed shackle?!

There was indeed a cursed shackle on Yin Yu's arm! Xie Lian quickly looked over, and Yin Yu also raised his wrist. That band of cursed shackle had tightened greatly, so much so that it

looked like it was going to snap Yin Yu's hand. Yin Yu's entire arm had already turned tragically pale like paper, and that whiteness was spreading.

That cursed shackle was sucking his blood!

Xie Lian lunged forward, and his entire person along with the chair fell over on the ground in a heap. Now, he couldn't even see the mirror. He struggled crazily on the ground but it was useless, and could only hear the sound of crazed beating from the mirror.

After a good while, a pair of white boots appeared before his eyes. It was Jun Wu, who had returned.

In his hand was a dark crimson cursed shackle that was sucked full of blood, probably removed from Yin Yu. He crouched down and petted Xie Lian's head.

"Go bid your farewells to your little friend."

Ruoye's dead knot was finally untied. Xie Lian crawled to his feet and threw a punch to his face. Of course, the punch didn't land and he almost fell over himself, but he didn't actually expect to hit Jun Wu anyway and was only venting. He dashed madly to the hall next door.

Yin Yu was lying on the ground, dried-up and shriveled, white and thin like a paper doll; even his cheeks were sallow. All the spiritual powers in his body were gone, returned to the bruised and beaten Quan Yizhen, whose face was now completely unrecognizable. It seemed, those spiritual powers had returned to their master.

Xie Lian rushed over. "YOUR HIGHNESS YIN YU!!!"

Yin Yu blinked with a pair of eyes that were more gaunt than before, and when he saw him, he croaked, "Your Highness…"

Quan Yizhen was clinging onto the ground, crying at the top of his lungs, screaming to the heavens. "I'M SORRY SHIXIONG, I ONLY KNOW HOW TO FIGHT, BUT I CAN'T BEAT HIM!"

The blood from his mouth and nose splattered onto Yin Yu's face and eyes again, and just watching it looked miserable. Veins popped on Yin Yu's forehead, and he shouted with the last bit of his life, "I TOLD YOU TO STOP THAT!! Sigh! Nevermind…just drive me to my death…"

He lost his vigour once again. Seeing this, Xie Lian couldn't tell if he wanted to moan and groan or cry, or perhaps he wanted to break out in laughter.

Suddenly, Yin Yu's dried eyes were filled with tears. He whispered, "I knew."

He said, "Yizhen is a genius, I'm a commoner. The highest I could climb was only so high. I knew this."

A sense of powerlessness and pain swarmed Xie Lian's heart.

"Even though I knew, I still couldn't accept it," Yin Yu said. "In truth, I thought the same as Jian Yu. I felt even more indignant than he did. It's not that I've never felt resentment, it's impossible not to feel resentment. After the incident, I never dared to think why I told Yizhen to go die even though I knew he was wearing the Brocade Immortal. Was I really just driven to madness, or did I really want him to die?"

Xie Lian hugged him. "It's alright, it's alright. These are all small matters, really. Your Highness Yin Yu, just live in this world for another few hundred years and you'll know that none of that really matters. Either driven to madness or really wishing someone would die, whichever. Who in the world has never had such thoughts? I've even thought of massacring all in the world who had wronged me, it's true, and no lie, I'd almost done it. But look at me, haven't I shamelessly lived until now? You haven't actually done anything in the end, and that's the most important thing."

"But…in the end, I…still think…it's so unfair," Yin Yu sobbed. "If I was already destined to be no one remarkable, then at the very least, I…wanted to be a kind and perfect person. But…I couldn't even do that. It's really…so unfair. And truth to be told, even in this moment, just thinking that I'm dying for Yizhen, this little dummy, I still can't get over it. I can't even let go and die with a heart with no resentment and no regrets, what is that."

Xie Lian comforted softly, "Your Highness, you've already worked really hard. And you've done very well. You're already much, much better than most people."

Yin Yu finally gave a small chuckle arduously. "Better than most people, huh?" After he stopped, he sighed, and the sound of his last regret passed along with his soul as he mumbled, "But, I wanted to be a god…"

Xie Lian bowed his head deeply. "But, Your Highness Yin Yu, there is actually no god in this world…"