Gracious Matt Thomas

A Short Story

by Reading dreamer

Matt Thomas looked at the weathered blade in his hands and felt ambivalent.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his derelict surroundings. He had always hated wild West Boggins with its crowded, confused cliffs. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel ambivalent.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Charlotte England. Charlotte was a clever ogre with pointy toes and beautiful feet.

Matt gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a gracious, creepy, port drinker with brown toes and red feet. His friends saw him as a long, lively lawyer. Once, he had even brought a xanthocarpous baby bird back from the brink of death.

But not even a gracious person who had once brought a xanthocarpous baby bird back from the brink of death, was prepared for what Charlotte had in store today.

The snow flurried like sitting cats, making Matt fuzzy.

As Matt stepped outside and Charlotte came closer, he could see the cool smile on her face.

Charlotte glared with all the wrath of 43 brave dead dogs. She said, in hushed tones, "I hate you and I want a resolution."

Matt looked back, even more fuzzy and still fingering the weathered blade. "Charlotte, exterminate," he replied.

They looked at each other with ecstatic feelings, like two light, little lizards loving at a very snooty bar mitzvah, which had reggae music playing in the background and two greedy uncles walking to the beat.

Suddenly, Charlotte lunged forward and tried to punch Matt in the face. Quickly, Matt grabbed the weathered blade and brought it down on Charlotte's skull.

Charlotte's pointy toes trembled and her beautiful feet wobbled. She looked jumpy, her emotions raw like a hilarious, helpless hawk.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Charlotte England was dead.

Matt Thomas went back inside and made himself a nice glass of port.

THE END