Pathetic Side

The bright light from the sunlight seeped in through the window, illuminating the room. A lone figure was seated on the bed, leaning against the headboard.

Odette Albinius' features were deadly pale, and the sheet around her was stained in red. The scratches present on her neck, and dried blood tinted them.

The dagger laid beside her, and the cuts she had made on her hand were distinctly visible. While some of the cuts had stopped bleeding, others did not close up yet.

Although it was morning, none of the maids entered into the room. Nonetheless, this did not bring surprise to Odette for it was a common occurrence. Everytime she was poisoned, this had happened.

Her mother had a strange obsession when it came to purchasing poisons, and everytime she got a new poison on her hand, she fed them to Odette in certain quantities in order to make her immune to them. There were no boundaries that her mother would not cross when it came to making her strong.

Since such occurrences were regular to Odette, she could not exactly predict when her food will be poisoned. In her last life, she didn't have the authority to go against her mother and, on top of that, was manipulated to believe this was for her own good.

In her previous life, due to huge abuse done by the poison, she lost the ability to feel pain, and because of how long had it been since she went through the sensation, the torture last night drove her to insanity.

Fortunately, she had enough sense to stop before the mattered became serious. There would be no turning back if she had pierced her neck with that blade.

This time around, Odette could change the trajectory if she wanted. It wouldn't take her much to do so. But reasons made her decide against it— to leave the matter alone.

Reasons that she hated thinking about made Odette feel currently helpless to her mother currently. Odette clenched her hand into a tight fist with burning hatred in them. Soon, she would be giving her dear mother a memorable death.

Odette felt sick being on a path designed by others. It made her feel lowly.

The distant memory of when she was first poisoned flooded inside of her mind. Maybe because of how pathetic she was that day, the memory had been imprinted into her mind regardless of how long had it been.

Odette remembered about the intense pain she went through and how she begged for help. Knocking on the locked door of the cold room, she cried for someone to help stop the pain and comfort her.

However, no one came to her rescue. Her mother did not bother with her, and the maids did not care about what she was dealing with. She was left to her own devices with no one having enough conscience to call for a doctor.

Her four year old self was locked inside that dark and cold room for probably around three days without food or water before finally her mother wanted to look for her.

Back then, her state was terrible. If she was rescued a little later, her life would have been gone. Her mother got angry when she learned of that, and she ordered for almost all the servant in her quarter to be whipped.

She was too naive and pathetic at that time to think that her mother did it for her sake. She had been foolishly happy.

More than being saved, she was happier at her mother showing concern for her. How idiotic was that!

After that, maybe she had cried for help for a couple more times. Although she was not locked in a dark and frightening room any more, no one responded to her calls— not even her mother.

That was when she realized that she was alone. There was no one truly beside her side. Everyone who approached her had an ulterior motive— her mother included.

As expected, she was immensely hurt by it in the beginning, but soon enough, she had grown to become numb to it. Since she didn't care for anyone anymore, it didn't matter to her whether or not they felt concern for her.

That's when her obsession with things she found amusing took root. The self she deemed to be pathetic wanted to show others how she could be completely happy without anyone's love or care and that she was superior.

Even the her right now felt this way. She couldn't be loved. It's fine as long as she was made to make all others cry underneath her.

Pushing the blanket off of her body, Odette Albinius got down from the bed, and a sharp pain went through her forehead causing her to halt in her steps. The pain from yesterday caused her to feel fatigue.

With her wobbly legs, Odette took couple of steps forward while a dull ache remained within her chest. It appeared that the effect of the poison had not subsided completely.

When she took a few more steps forward, her knees gave in all of a sudden, and her body fell towards the ground. Her body crashing against the floor created a loud sound, and pain permeated through her entire body.

Pressing her palms against the floor, Odette sat up straight and leaned her body against the bed. This was how far she was able to use her strength. She was too weak to stand up and make her way towards the bathroom.

"L-Lady O-Odette, m-may we enter in?"

The shaky voice of the maid entered into her ear, and this amplified the intensity of her headache.

Odette gave no reply, making the maid feel on pins and needles.

Odette Albinius had no idea on when she will be able to get her weak self off the ground. Nonetheless, she had to keep on making the effort.

As for the maids outside the room, she didn't want them to be at peace when she was suffering. Maybe this was her being petty. However, this inherently was her. She wanted to punish all of them for experiencing this pathetic side of hers.