Chapter 35: Cinder Fall

He had a dream, A surprising one really...

He was sitting on the porch, of a Snow Covered cabin...

Two energetic kids playing in the snow, He had no idea what was happening, but he knew it was a dream.

He was drinking Hot coco, as he watched the kids loiter, It brought a smile to his face and he doesn't know why, he had a feeling of accomplishment and pride as he stared at the two kids.

Then the door opened, he looked behind him and saw a beautiful lady covered in her winter outfit.

The lady went near the kids, wiping the snot from their faces, softly reprimanding them.

Laughing, the kids ran at him... they were grinning from ear to ear as they approached him, it must be something his wife said.

He knew it was his wife, Because even without words he understood what she told their kids...

The boy Climbed on his lap the girl climbed on his shoulder.

They called out 'Daddy~ hehehehe, mommy said we're going to beacon!'

He laughed as he rubbed both of their heads...

Of course he agreed to take them there, His wife added, "That's where your father and I got together you know..."

The kids giggled. 'We know mom~ you've told us this so many times already~ hehehehe.'

He knew this was bliss, But he also knew this was just a dream...

This is what it felt like to be content, The comfort of home, a different kind of comfort...

He remembered the man from his childhood, his first kill.

This must be why he felt so happy, why he was compelled to do those horrible things...

And yet I Took it from him...

What he has done is evil...

But what I did was worse...

Evil is evil, lesser, greater, or middling, it makes no goddamn difference...

The degree is arbitrary, the definition's blurred.

But as he stared at his two kids he understood one thing, his worries would be blown away as long as he could see those smiles.

So fuck choosing on what's the lesser or greater evil...

For these two I would do anything...

The image of the two kids slowly blurred he knew he was about to wake up, so he held his family close...

Waking up, Haruki felt something soft on the back of his head. His hair slowly being brushed aside.

He opened his eyes He saw Cinder staring at him affectionately. She was using her lap as his pillow.

Haruki enjoyed the sight and thought to himself. 'Just seeing this smile makes everything feel like it's worth it. I never thought she'd change like this, but it's all for the better.'

He held her face, She held his hand on her face, her fingertips slightly shaking.

Haruki noticed this, but he thought she's probably just nervous for their date...

Haruki smiled and brought her face close, he kissed her lips. As their lips parted, Haruki spoke...

"I had a great dream you know..."

Cinder asked him as she caressed his hair, "What was it about?"

He grinned, "It was a nice place, a cozy one. There were two kids running about in the snow covered yard.

Their face dripping with snot, as you softly reprimanded them. But they just giggled and ran towards me."

Cinder was surprised then she gave Haruki a motherly smile, She pressed her forehead on his forehead. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes.

She gently moved Haruki's head, "C'mon let's get a move on."She said as she stood up and took his towel and threw it in his face.

Haruki jumped from the bed, and went inside to take a shower.

Cinnder on the other hand changed into a more casual wear.

She wore a thin black shirt, underneath her red Coat, and black skirt with white Flowers embroidered on it. And black heels. She fashioned a red chocker and a black scarf with gold embroidery.

She brushed her hair, and let it down like she always does.

Haruki came out of the shower, He was slack jawed by Cinders style.

She looked behind her and saw Haruki dumbly staring at her. She smugly walked towards him and lifted his chin. "You like what you see?" She said softly with her melodious voice.

He said. "I 'Love' what I see" He said as he stared straight.

She kissed him on the cheeks, "That's so cheesy" She said as she immediately looked away, blushing.

Haruki then changed his clothes, Into something similar he wore last time, he just Changed up the colors a little bit.

When they were both ready, They walked out of the room hand in hand.

They went straight towards the fancy Restaurant The Vale Table, She donned her normal arrogant attitude, not a single trace of that sweet Cinder a few minutes ago.

Haruki approached the receptionist, "Reservation for Two, under the name of Kazama?"

The receptionist was surprised inwardly, she tried to maintain her calm, She kept staring at Haruki and Cinder, She thought to herself, They're both so dashing and beautiful...

"It's like staring at a painting...How nice..."

Unknowingly she has said it out loud. But no one in the vicinity reprimanded her, for they were all thinking the same thing about the two of them.

The receptionist found the reservation, and remembered the man's name... she kept repeating it on her mind, She was woken up from her stupor by Haruki, He smiled at her causing her to blush slightly.

"Umm, about the reservation?"

The receptionist immediately told them to go inside right away, stuttering in her words.

"Y-yesh right this w-way Mr.Kazama."

Haruki thanked her while Cinder wasn't amused by the girls attitude.

Their seats were positioned at the top overlooking, the entire night view of the beach.

While they were waiting, Cinder was drinking her wine.

He was having dinner face-to-face with a beautiful mature lady, That alone was enough to earn jealous looks from everyone around him.

And yet that mature lady's hand was shaking a little, She said "Shame you can't drink... Physically you're still not 21."

Haruki laughed, "I've had my fill with alcohol"

He said as he picked up the bottle and poured himself a drink.

"Although a little once In a while ain't bad."

Dissatisfied by the wine, he wanted to order something, a drink that has a little kick to it.

(A.N. : Better make this clear right now, I don't promote underage drinking.)

Cinder stopped sipping on her glass, she asked Haruki, "Come to think of it. we haven't had a proper talk like this until now..."

She said as she twirled the wine in her glass, But before Haruki could utter any words, The waiter arrived bringing appetizer that cinder ordered.

It was Almond Jelly, She ate a whole spoonful of almond jelly. "Mm. I love this food so much"

Haruki smiled and asked,"why do you like it?"

Cinder smiled, "I often had it as a snack ever since I was little. So I guess that's why I came to like it."

Haruki continued to ask her so many questions all about her, Cinder forgot her nervousness as she answered his questions.

They finished eating at that fancy restaurant. Haruki and Cinder were strolling around the bustling night time of Vale's most famous resort.

Cinder found a bench and sat down, Haruki sat next to her, She stretched her arms upwards.

Cinder stared at the myriads of people that passed by, some were family, some were with their significant others, and some were alone...

just like she used to...

She showed Haruki a weak and lonely smile full of self mockery.

She finally spoke...

"You know Haruki... I never expected we'd end up together, not that I don't like it, but there's just this inkling feeling.

Whenever I get so close, I feel so nervous, even when you just touched my face earlier.

I was so afraid that this will all be an illusion, just like that time in gluttony's temple.

I lost people that were important to me once... I don't want it to happen again. I'm afraid that if I lose you once more, I would go back to that cold and dark lonely place..."

She leaned her head on Haruki's shoulders.

"I keep telling myself that I can't keep running around in circles, I just can't figure it out!

I keep my mind away from all my doubts, So I don't drown in my own fucking desperation!

I didn't want to think about it, but Everytime you come close, what if the feelings I have for you now, was just all fabrication!

What if...

This kind of feeling, this kind of sensation...

The way my heart beats...

What if it all disappears one day!?

I don't want it to be fake! Haruki please tell me... I can't keep on going on like this."

Haruki gently smiled at her as he caressed her beautiful face and kissed her.

He said, "Tell me what did you feel in that kiss?"

Cinder couldn't answer as her face was a little red. Haruki continued, "If you're afraid to lose that feeling, then hold on to it until you realize what that means."

She looked at Haruki wondered what he meant. He flicked her on the forehead.

"It only means one thing, if you're afraid of losing that feeling, then it means you're already considering it as real."

She immediately replied, "But that's not enough! you can't quantify your feeling by fear!"

Haruki laughed, "Honestly babe, who can quantify love?"

Haruki continued, "Do you know why you're so afraid?

Hehe, we both dove into this relationship head first, not knowing what to do... you clung to the motivation of wanting to see Alice and Caleb Jr. once again...

But that's not a bad thing, it's just you're doubting yourself whether that's enough to say that you love someone...

you're just quite new to this, Hell, no one is actually prepared for any of this. Diving head first into the unknown scares most people, but it's not that scary it's just life..."

Haruki affectionately ruffled her hair, And told her, "Stop thinking too much, and just enjoy! we'll get to that point eventually."

Cinder shook away Harukis hand, She sighed and smiled, "You're right... c'mon the let's go have some fun!"

She stood up with the most beautiful smile

She ran towards the shore, so he ran towards her direction. She removed her heels, and ran at the sides of the beach, and waded her feet at the shore.

She splashed Haruki with water, "Hehehe, there!"

Haruki dodged her attempt to splash him with water.

"Hehehe, No fair! you're not allowed to dodge!"

She tackled Haruki towards the water, They both fell down and got wet. She stared at Haruki and kissed him deeply.

She no longer had doubts, She thought to herself...

'Hell, you're never going to know what's going to happen next, you're never gonna know if he's the one, it's a leap of faith.'

She giggled like a kid, for the first time in a long time.

They played in the shore underneath the beautiful moonlit night.

They both didn't notice the time, they were in their own little world.

Haruki materialized Towels to dry themselves.

Cinder, laid down on the Sandy Beach, Haruki laid beside her...

"Do I... do I deserve all of this? after all that I've done? am I allowed to be this happy?"

Haruki answered her question, "We carry the burden of the lives we have taken, it's our duty to carry that weight, it's not like I'm undermining what I've done but, I will do my best to get my fair share of happiness. For me and for them.

And honestly I ask myself that question a lot, but then when I woke up earlier and saw you, I thought to myself everything was worth it."

She was laughing, She stared affectionately at Haruki.

Haruki sat up staring at the stars, "Let's just go at it on our own pace, Alice and Caleb Jr. will soon follow after."

She hugged him tight, "You have been saying so many cheesy lines tonight. how about shutting up and kissing me."

She pulled him close, and nibbled on his lips.

They didn't care if they were in the sand.

Cinder giggled again, God knows how many times she has laughed today...

Haruki stood up and materialized some fireworks for the night.

The first things he brought out we're Huge ass fireworks, He made a show for Cinder and Cinder alone, But after awhile the place was slowly crowded by onlookers.

Then the fireworks display ended, Haruki and Cinder looked around and slowly saw a lot of people...

So reluctantly he made a huge bonfire, and everyone danced around.

He held out his hands towards her, "Would you care to dance my darling cinder?"

She extended her hands and followed Haruki, and they danced along with the crowd.

He danced with Cinder, They joined hands with strangers, and yet oddly they had a fun night.

It was almost Dawn, so they left...

After the bonfire, they slowly went back to their place...

Cinder was strolling with Haruki whilst hugging his arms.

"Hehehehe, this is one of the best days of my life!"

Haruki gently smiled at her, "Hehehe, yeah me too."

He caressed her face and kissed her.

""I love you..."" They said at the same time.

Everything went quiet.

A punctuated ending followed by that involuntary reflection, that happens when life quickly changes from fast to slow...

Back then when she first felt this was when she was young and she just lost everyone she cared for...

But her thoughts this time were of, contentment and hope for the future.

It was not the same girl who was sitting at the edge of the cliff watching the sunset not knowing what to do...

Well, she still doesn't know what's to come, but she no longer was the weak girl that she used to be...

She grinned fearlessly towards the great unknown, and thought to herself 'Wait for me... Alice... And Caleb Jr , Mommy's gonna come and get you...'

She whispered on Haruki's ear, "So... when are you going to give me Alice and Caleb?"

She then ran away as she said that leaving Haruki dumbfounded...

Haruki chased her as she returned to their room.

Her beautiful laughter echoed throughout the night.