I saw Anya fighting Jack when I arrived, they were in a heated argument while the twins were held back by Brock. I wasn't sure the argument but my zen had deteriorated.
"Quiet!" They stopped and looked at me. "What the hell are you to arguing about?!"
Jack bowed respectfully, something I had never seen him do the almost year I had known him he was arrogant and dismissive of me. "What the hell Jack?"
"I need to show my respect to my Luna. I would like to apologize for my, former, rudeness."
Anya kicked him angrily. "Don't you spout your lies here! She's OUR alpha! I'll be damned if we join your heartless pack!"
Jack smirked. "You'll join our be cast aside again, your "alpha" bears the Shadow Moon mark."
Anya looked at me in horror. "I... Is that true Sera? Did that bastard mark you?"
I looked at them curiously. It was true that marks were usually exchanged between mates through intimacy but I had none. I looked at Jack "I'm sorry to disappoint but I remain, mark free."
He turned red. Maybe from anger? Maybe from embarrassment? Either way he was visibly confused. "How?! I know y'all..."he cleared his throat. "Regardless. I must respect you from now on."
"Why." I looked at him coldly. Even after I was found to be an alpha's daughter and after I became an alpha of my own pack he never cared to be respectful. Now that he thought I was accepting Davion I needed to be respected? No.
He was uncomfortable, he couldn't find the right words so Anya laughed. "You're an idiot, you always will be if you don't learn that everyone should be respected. Regardless of class or affiliation."
He said nothing as he shifted and disappeared. I could see he took her words to heart, perhaps he had hope to change in the future. I tried to avoid Anya's blazing glare but I knew I had to face it sooner or later. "I am sorry."
She hugged me tightly. "I was scared. Scared he was right."
I patted her trembling shoulders. "I make my promise to you. I will NEVER abandon you or anyone in the pack. If we merge we will merge into the Winter Knights, my familial pack."
Everyone nodded, it was my condition to join as I hadn't quite decided on my future there either. The focus was on the battles ahead. We gathered our camp and started the journey to the elders castle. I sent letter ahead of our arrival, it would take two weeks from the current camp but it would lead us straight through my former pack. It was the fastest route and I had nothing to fear from them anymore.
We traveled swiftly but the
closer we got to my old pack land the more hesitant I became. Anya tried to encourage me and I tried to pretend I was fine but as I stood on the edge of the pack land I felt an indescribable chill down my spine. The memories of painful loneliness and blatant disregard. The cold memories of Victor played in my mind. His hateful expression, his oppressive behavior and the way he treated me like an object. Now that I knew I was not his one true mate I could understand how he didn't lose a wink over the way he treated me but the image of his pained faced when I broke our bond still lingered in my mind. Perhaps we weren't fated but we were once legal bound. I was his wife and he was my husband. We once shared pleasant memories, he has one been the source of all my joy. Though I know I am a different woman, I can't deny who I was just because of it.
I took a deep breathe as I stepped into three labs I use to call home. It felt different. It seemed bleak and less cared for. Perhaps Natalia was neglecting the territory. The dirt road once paved with wild flowers was over grown with ugly weeds, the one crisp air felt thick and suffocating. Given the looks on my packs' faces I could tell it wasn't my imagination. This place was like a ghost land. We moved further in, cautiously until we found the pack house. It was as big as I remembered but less lively. I could sense the pack numbers had dwindled but there was no smell of blood or any of the normal disturbances from battle, their problems had to be internal. I couldn't help but partially care, I was there Luna for a long time. I knocked on the door and it swung open slowly. No one was there to get us and those inside acted like we were ghosts until they saw me.
"Luna!! You returned!!" They crowded me, lost in a fantasy that I'd come as their savior. "Oh thank the night mother!!" "We missed you" "please help us!" They were lost in the excitement until the all familiar scent of Natalia caused them to tremble.
She looked horrible, she was haggard and her face a horrid scowl. I would have thought she would have been over the moon as the new Luna. Her mark shimmering proudly on her nearly exposed chest. Anya covered the twins eyes and Natalia growled. "The hell do you want deserter?!" She took out a cigarette and took a long drag of her cigarette, she had picked up the habit long ago from how well she smoked it to a nub and pulled out another.
"The hell is going on here Natalia?" She laughed at my sincerity.
"What do you care you wretch?! I told him we should have just locked you up. Everything went to hell that day. It's all your fault!" She shouted and threw her hands wildly but even in her manic state she knew better. She dated not touch me now. She growled at the hollowed eyes pack members that still lingered. "Get me a drink you worthless hounds!"
I was stunned by her attitude and their broken spirits as they obeyed. They reminded me of my old self. Victor. Where the hell was he? I looked upstairs, my throat clenching tight as I moved forward. It shouldn't be my business. I should just walk away. I shouldn't stray from my mission but I couldn't ignore the devastation of a pack. A senseless decline. I grabbed myself as I moved towards the demons of my past.