11. The best medicine

One week later I'm here, once again. This chapter is… weird. Special, but weird. A lot of things to say. Several deleted scenes. A lot of little clues planted here and there for what's about to come. You gotta read between the lines.

My eternal gratefulness to all of you, my readers. Specially, as always, to those of you who left your reviews. By now I don't really know what can I say but thank you. Thank you all. Your reviews are like a ray of sunshine in a cloudy day(?) Ok, no, but I love reading your reviews.

Thanks to: Omega Ultra, littlealexmartinez61910, Emperor of Performances, Thunderstrike16, Codymitchell1, Slop The 3rd, Boris Yeltsin, BoukenDutch, FanficFan920, ImpossibleJedi4, ExMarkSpot, D-Structs, celrock, Grim-XIII, Mew Shadowfang, jellyhill, MikeTheHuman113, Jazz, ElectricLoud, LoudSin, Gumball2, d felipe76, MistyWolf322, 123456789, Secret life of writing, TexasGunKing, Samstastic 3,0, endeavor-NeverEnding, The Wannabe WriterOriginal, HtfLover, FrofreeTrush, erica phoenix16, GreatBeast455.

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Chapter 11:The best medicine.

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"Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face"Victor Hugo

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Lori was knocking on the bathroom's door, telling her that they were going to be late for school, but Luan decided to ignore her. She kept staring at herself in the mirror, finishing the last touches on her mime makeup. At first, it was enough to just delineate her eyelids and add some details around her eyes. The minimum amount of makeup, just so people would get that she was in her 'mime mode', though the outfit itself should be an obvious give away. However, just a few days after she started embracing her mime-self, she was needing a lot more makeup to hide her tell-tale eye bags. Luna still believed that Luan was the first one to fall asleep and the last one to wake up. She probably thought that her roommate was the one getting the most sleep this days.

She couldn't be more wrong.

She suited her beret and looked at her own reflection. Mimes usually wore white make up as a base for their faces, so the black details would be accentuated. She never used it, since she thought it was such a cumbersome preparation. But seeing her pale face in the mirror, she now could see the beauty of the contrast. She slowly turned her head from one side to the other, partly to check that her make up was good, partly just so she could play for time. She stared at her own face in the mirror, black and white. Luan took a deep breath and tried to relax. She tried to clear her mind, to stop thinking about everything. She just wanted to concentrate in what she was about to try.

Seventeen. Just seventeen…

Finally, psyching herself up, she tried it one more time. Two seconds later, her hand hit the wall. She couldn't believe it, she couldn't bear a new failure. She had to stop herself from letting out a cry, and she started to breath with some difficulty. She couldn't ruin her makeup, not now.

Lori banged the door once again, demanding her to get out of the bathroom and going into the family van, where they were all waiting for her so they could go to school. Luan didn't answer. She waited twenty seconds so she could regain a neutral expression, and then she finally left the bathroom. Lori didn't say anything to her. She just walked behind her as Luan grabbed her school bag and stepped downstairs. As she was going down the stairs, she heard Lincoln speaking with their mother.

"It's not a novel really, it'll be more like a… Some kind of diary, you know?" He was saying, sitting next to his mother in the sofa.

"And you…?" She started, with her fist against her mouth, trying to keep her composure.

"I know what I want to say, but I'm not that good with words. That's why I want you to help me, Mom, so these ideas on my head can be written. Like, well written."

Luan stopped in the last step. They hadn't seen her yet; they probably believed that they were all in the van already. She started to think about what Lincoln had just said. Was he trying to write something?

"Luan, we're late" Lori told her, impatiently.

Lori's voice alerted Lincoln and Rita about their presence, and they both turned around to look at them. They seemed to be surprised, and Lincoln looked somewhat scared. She understood that it was probably something he wanted to keep as a secret, so she silently kept walking out of the house and into Vanzilla.

She sat on the last remaining seat. It clearly wasn't the sweet spot, but whatever disadvantage her seat had, she didn't acknowledge it. Next to her, the twins were arguing about which was Blarney's best song. In the back, Luna was drumming the car window with her knuckles, trying to come up with a rhythm. Evidently, neither she or Lynn had won their argument with their parents about not wanting to go to school. Luan had taken advantage of the discussion to grab the breakfast that Lincoln had prepared for her, and headed straight to her room. She could barely taste it, because not only she had been losing her appetite lately, but also Luna came banging into their room, followed by her mother. Luan didn't want to speak with anyone, so she took her makeup and went to the bathroom.

Truth be told, she didn't want to go to school neither. High school was hell already for her, and everyday felt like a little torture. This last week, however, had been much, much worse than usual, and there was nothing that could make her think that things were going to get better anytime soon. In fact, they were all heading to the worst possible outcome…

She rested her head against the window and closed her eyes. Vanzilla was the most uncomfortable vehicle in the world, a real insult to ergonomics. She was so tired, though, so exhausted and in need of a little rest, that her eyelids had barely touched each other when she fell asleep.

"Lori! Leni!"

The sharp voice of a little boy echoed across the house, which was practically silent. From downstairs, she could hear the sound of the child opening the doors of every one of his sisters rooms, and then closing them without caring about all the noise he was making. Luan Loud was sitting in the couch in front of the TV, watching her favorite movie. She turned her head around, her eyes fixed in her parents bedroom. Her mom and little Lucy were taking a nap there, and Luan was afraid that the sound of the doors would wake them up. Her mother was exhausted, and the last thing she needed was having to deal with a crying ten-months-old baby.

"Luna!" The little voice kept calling, clearly not knowing the situation of the house.

Carefully, Luan stood up. She fixed her yellow dress with her hands, and went to the stairs. When she got there, she saw that her little brother was already trying to go downstairs. She could tell that he had just woken up from nap, since he was wearing his orange pajama and was carrying both his blanky and Bun-Bun. He was stretching to reach the stair railings, and he was going one step at the time. His little face of concentration was absolutely adorable in Luan's eyes.

"Need some help, Linky?" She softly said, only loud enough for him to hear her.

He looked up and his face shone with excitement when he saw his sister.

"Luan! Luan!"

He just stood in his place with his arms up, the unequivocal sign that he wanted her to lift him up in her arms. She was happy to oblige. She climbed up the stairs until she was just one step down from him, grabbed him by his armpits and gently lifted him. He wrapped his arms and legs around her, like a koala baby, resting his head on her shoulder.

"Mom and Lucy are sleeping, so we need to whisper" she said, as she walked to the couch once again.

She sat in front of the TV, still carrying Lincoln.

"Were are they all?" He then asked, his face a little worried. "There's no one in the rooms."

"Dad and the girls went to the mall. I wanted to stay and watch 'Finding Nemo'", she said, pointing at the screen showing two clownfishes in the big blue sea.

He didn't say anything. He made himself comfortable on his sister's lap, and held Bun-Bun tightly against him.

"Are you alright, Linky?" Luan asked, sensing that there was something bothering her little brother.

"I had a nightmare" he whispered, choking Bun-Bun with his hug, his little eyes twinkling with fear. "I wanted Lori or Leni to tell me a bedtime story, or Luna to sing me a lullaby, but they're not here."

Luan felt like a failure. Lincoln was scared, like any four years old boy who had just woken up from a nightmare, and he needed someone to calm him down, to reassure him that everything was going to be alright. But none of the persons who could help him were there. Their mother was sleeping, and his father and the rest of the girls were in the mall. The only one who was there for him was Luan, and unfortunately, she didn't know how to cheer him up. Lori and Leni would tell him one of the many stories they knew by heart, Luna would sing him a tender lullaby, even Lynn would manage to convince him that nothing could happen to him as long as she was there to keep him safe from everything, and she would probably lay besides him and they could nap together.

But Luan didn't have Lynn's temperament, and she didn't know any story to tell him, nor any lullaby to sing to him. She had no talent or ability whatsoever that could help him right now. The only thing she could give him was her company, hoping that it could be enough.

"It's alright, Linky, you're with me now", she said, embracing him. "Look, 'Finding Nemo' is about to end. Do you want to see 'Tarzan' with me afterwards?"

She knew that Tarzan was both Lincoln and Lynn's favorite movie, and the two of them would always end up playing like they were apes, and the house was their jungle. She was pretty sure that would cheer him up. Indeed, the mere mention of the movie made Lincoln smile. He still looked a little upset, but it was a beginning.

"Okay" he said.

Luan shifted him a little, so he could sit more comfortably in her lap. He had just the right height so she could watch the movie over his white hair. In the movie, Marlin, Nemo's dad, was finally telling his joke.

"...so the sea cucumber turns to the mollusk and says 'With fronds like these, who need anemones?' " he said, and the rest of the fishes started to crack up.

"I don't get it" said Lincoln, frowning at the screen. "What's so funny about that?"

"Well, we don't hear all the joke", said Luan, shruggering it off, "but it was just a pun."

"What's a pun?"

"It's a play of words. When words sounds similar, but they mean different things, and it's funny because it kinda makes sense in both ways."

Lincoln turned around and stared at her with confused eyes.

"What?" He said, clearly not understanding her.

Luan sighed. She wasn't the best at explaining things either.

"I mean, like Marlin's joke. The real phrase is 'with friends like these, who needs enemies', but since they're underwater, he says 'with fronds like these, who needs anemones'. Get it?"

She could see through her brothers eyes. She saw the engines working together, trying to decode the joke. When he finally understood it, his face was completely shocked for a moment, completely stunned, like he'd just found a hidden treasure. And right away he let out a chuckle, showing his big smile with a missing teeth.

Hearing him laugh was a big relief for Luan.

"I get it!" He said, chuckling a little more. "Do you know another pun?"

Luan's mind was trying to remember. She didn't really know any jokes, that was her father's hobby. She tried to think about any joke that she'd heard in the school, in TV, but she couldn't remember not a single one. She looked at her brother. He was waiting for a joke. He wanted to laugh. She wanted to make him laugh. Then she saw Bun-Bun, and an idea struck her.

"Lincoln, do you know why Bun-Bun's never hungry?"

He looked confused and stared at the bunny. With an innocent smile, he said he didn't.

"Because he's always STUFFED! Haha, get it?"

"Yes!" He said, starting to clap and chuckling a little more. " 'Cause he's a stuffed animal!"

"Exactly!"

"Another, please, tell me another!"

Now she had something going on. It wasn't really that hard to make a pun. You just had to think with a different perspective. She started to think about a new joke to say to him. She was no clown, but… Clown… That was it!

"I held a door open for a clown the other day, you know why?" She asked, with a big smile.

"W-Why?" He said, laughing in anticipation.

"Because it was a nice JESTER! Hahaha, get it?"

This time, Lincoln couldn't keep his volume down, and Luan had to cover his mouth with her hand to muffle his laughter. He realized that, and he tried to shut himself up, but he couldn't stop laughing. Luan was fascinated. She had never cracked a single joke, so she didn't really know that magnificent sensation of making other people laugh. It was something that was making her feel proud, it made her feel happy. She needed to keep him laughing, she needed to come up with a new pun. She started to think.

What did they have for lunch?

"Hey, Lincoln, listen up" she said, starting to laugh before even telling her joke. "What…? What d-does…? Pff… What does a s-sausage says when — when it wins the race?"

He started giggling too, seeing how his sister was reacting to the joke before even finishing it. He was starting to get hyped up.

"I-I don't k-know" he answered.

"I'm a WIENER!"

He opened his mouth as wide as he could and started cracking up. She couldn't resist the urge and started laughing too. They tried to keep it quiet so they wouldn't wake their mom, but were failing miserably at it. Seeing each other trying to stop laughing and failing at it made them laugh even more. In a couple of minutes, they were both rolling in the carpet, their faces red and with tears falling down their cheeks. They reached a point where they had no more air in their lungs, and that struggle to breathe only kept making the situation worse.

While doing an inhuman effort to sit up and catch her breath, Luan realized something: her little brother had the most beautiful laughter in the world. It was almost melodic, a series of sharps sounds of happiness that suddenly made her feel the utmost joy. She had just made him forgot about his nightmare. She turned to look at him. He was lying on the floor, tangled in his own blanky, with his hands on his stomach, laughing loudly. There was not a hint of worry on his face. If that wasn't happiness, then Luan didn't know what it was. All she knew was that those silly puns had made her little brother happy.

She'd had to come up with some more.

"Here we are."

Lori's voice and the van suddenly stopping woke Luan up. She sat straight and looked through the window. They were in the school's parking lot. She realized she'd fallen asleep, and she tried to remember if she had dreamed about something. She kinda believed she had, but all she could remember was an angel laughing. Not giving it too much thought —she was always dreaming with laughs—, she got out of the van along with Lynn, Luna, Leni and Lori, and the five Loud sisters started to walk to the school.

"Babe!"

The distant figure of Bobby Santiago became larger and larger, until he was received with a big hug by Lori.

"How are you?" He worriedly asked, as soon as they ended their embrace.

"I, er… You know… Terrible" she finally admitted, hiding her teary face in her boyfriend's torso.

"Oh, babe..."

The couple stood in the middle of the parking lot, trying to comfort each other, and the rest of the girls decided to keep walking. They'd be late to their classes if they didn't hurry, and none of them really wanted to stay there, watching their older sister breaking down just before entering school. They didn't want to go through the same. The four of them continued walking, until a group of girls wearing t-shirts from different European soccer teams started to call Lynn's name, waving their hands. She sighed, bid goodbye to his sisters with a 'Later' and she went to join her friends, walking without any kind of enthusiasm. Some minutes later, some girls wearing skirts, long boots and shirts from their favorite bands approached them, grabbed and practically dragged Luna to the music room, talking about a new amplifier that was "absolutely rad".

And then there were two. Luan and Leni kept walking side by side. Their classrooms were in the other end of the school, and the bell would rang any minute now.

"Luan, you're not making many jokes lately, aren't you?" Leni casually asked as they strolled by the cafeteria.

Luan didn't answer. Dumb, moony Leni. Why was she like that? Why couldn't she just ignore her like the rest of her sisters? Why was she so forthright? Sometimes, Luan lost her patience with Leni. Right then, however, she kept her composure and remained in silence.

"You know, I'd like to tell you something" said Leni, lowering her voice a little, like she was ashamed of what she was about to say. "I know I never laugh at your jokes. No one does, because they all, like, think that they're pretty bad and totes annoying."

Luan clenched her fist. What was she trying to do? To make her cry in the middle of the school?

"But I don't. I don't laugh because… Well… 'Cause I don't understand them. I know that you're always asking if we get them or not, but it's embarrassing to admit that I'm the only one who doesn't understand them" she confessed, sounding disappointed with herself. "I always try to remember them, though, and when we're alone, I ask Lori to explain them to me. And I think that you're totally funny. Maybe the rest of the guys don't like it too much, but I think it's cute that you're always trying to make us smile, specially when we need it the most."

Luan started to walk a little faster. She wanted to reach her classroom and go inside it as soon as possible. Her eyes were starting to itch, and she wasn't really looking forward to ruin her makeup with her tears. Leni definitely had no sense of timing whatsoever.

Luckily for her, she didn't need to make any maneuver to get away from Leni. As soon as they got to the most crowded part of the high school, boys from all ages started to surround them, trying to see Leni, offering to carry her books, her bag, and even herself to her class. Taking advantage of the crowd, Luan started to walk away from her sister.

On her flee, a boy a little older than her bumped her in the shoulder.

"Watch where you're going, nutso" said the boy, glaring at her with scorn, before resuming his way.

Luan also kept walking. "Nutso". He was in the basketball team, then; they were the only ones who called her like that. The football teem called her "the Loud freak" and the lacrosse team just referred to her as "that mad girl", while the rest of the school just knew her as "the Lame-puns Loud". She didn't care anymore. She was beyond that. They could call her whatever they wanted. If she let them get to her, then they'd win. So she simply ignored them all.

Everyday.

The school day went, amazingly enough, without any incident. No one told her to shut up, no one threw her books to the floor as she was walking between classes, and none of her sisters tried to make her speak. Apparently, many things could be avoided when you just kept your mouth shut the whole time and had your lunch in the library. The only thing she couldn't avoid were the funny looks, the snickers and the mumbling people started to make when they saw her dressed as a mime. But then again, she was used to it. People laughed about her looks all the time. Apparently, it was a crime to not wear short skirts. And her buckteeth and braces weren't exactly the latest fashion trends. She had it assumed that she wasn't as pretty as her older sisters. It didn't hurt her to be reminded of it.

Everyday.

Everywhere she went.

She texted Lori, telling her that she'd be staying in school after classes so she could study with a friend. Lori told her that it was okay, and wished her luck, but they both knew that Luan didn't have any friend to study with. Lori knew it was just an excuse because Luan didn't want to go back home in the family van. Instead, when the school day was over, she decided to walk her way home. It was a longer trip, but it would allow her to catch some fresh air, distract herself, and delay her arrival to her house. She didn't want to be there. Why would she want to be there? Just to be reminded that soon enough things would never be the same?

But she lived there, so it wasn't like she could avoid it forever. She eventually got home, and just in time for the drama. She had barely left her stuff in her room when the entry door was suddenly opened, and someone climbed the stairs in a stampede, startling her.

"Lincoln, what happened?!" Said the loud and extremely worried voice of Lori, coming from downstairs.

Luan's heart stopped itself for a couple of seconds. She bolted out of her room just in time to see Lincoln going inside his own. She thought she heard some metallic noise, but she didn't give it much thought at the moment. The rest of the girls arrived seconds later, the elders with worried faces.

"Dude, are you okay?!" Asked Luna, banging his door.

"I'm alright… It's nothing" he said, trying to reassure them that he was okay, but they could hear that he was in pain, and it looked like he was crying.

"Lincoln, I'm coming in" said Lori, trying to open the door to the linen closet.

But no matter how hard she turned the door knob, she couldn't get inside his room.

"Lincoln! Did you put your bed in front of the door?!"

"Mom bought me a new spare key" he simply said.

All the girls exchanged a confused look. Lincoln had lost the key to his bedroom some years ago while he was home alone, and because of that he'd been locked inside his room for hours, until someone came back and found him. As a punishment, his parents had forbidden him from having any kind of lock to his room. All his sisters were pretty happy to be able to go inside his room anytime they wanted, and they stomped his privacy practically all the time. Evidently, Lincoln had talked with his parents and asked them to make him a new key. What was he hiding in his room?

"Lincoln, open your door" Lori sternly said.

"I can't."

"Lincoln, open your door or I'll let Lynn tear it down."

"No! You can't come in!" He yelled from inside his room. "I'll tell you what happened, but you can't get in here!"

Lola and Lana started to protest, but the five older sisters understood that if Lincoln didn't let them in, then he probably had a reason. Maybe it was related with the secret they all had to keep.

The rest was history. He told them about Ronnie Anne, about everything that had happened between him and her the day before and that very morning. He didn't say that he wanted to tell Ronnie Anne about him dying. Instead, he just said that he wanted to invite her to a video-games convention. The twins and Lucy seemed to buy his lie. As they heard him, they all started to hate Ronnie Anne a little. How could she think that Lincoln could do something like that? Why wouldn't she listen to him? When they heard someone knocking on the door, they send Lynn to see who it was.

Big mistake.

After the girls fought each other, Lincoln took Ronnie Anne to his room, and he stayed there for the rest of the afternoon. They were all curious to know what was going on inside there, but Lori strictly forbidden anyone to spy on them or to try to hear what they were saying. Luan left them alone. She secluded herself in her room, since Luna was busy in the garage playing her guitar. She just sat there and turned on her computer. She checked her notifications, and found out that she had five new followers in her YouTube channel, "Luan Out Loud". She also checked her Facebook, send Lola those five lives she needed for Candy Crush, and also read a message someone had left on her 'Funny Business' Page.

Some lady was interested in hired her services for her son's sixth birthday party next Sunday. She was apologizing for calling with so little anticipation, and she was offering to pay a little extra money for the inconvenients. Luan looked at the boxes where she kept all her jokes equipment. She needed to replace the Magic Set she had gotten for Christmas, and her unicycle wheel needed some adjusts. She could really use some money. But she took her reputation and her work very seriously, and she would never accept a job if she wasn't convinced that she could give her best. So, before accepting the job, she had to try it again.

She walked until she stood before the full length mirror she and Luna had in their room. She took a deep breath and tried to focus.

Seventeen.

Since her whole life was about trying to make people smile, she had researched a lot about it. Seventeen were the muscles needed, according to several studies, to smile. The body needed six muscle groups so the mouth could turn into a smile. But you needed at least five more muscles so the smile could reach the eyes. That was the key to tell a genuine smile from a fake one. The eyes. It was something that could not be faked.

So she focused and tried to think about happy memories. She tried to remember her first performance in front of an audience, in her first viral video, the first check sent to her name. Those were thoughts that usually made her feel proud and cheered her up. She tried to picture herself smiling, she concentrated with all her might. When she opened her eyes, she tried to make her face turn into an honest smile, and then she looked at the results in the mirror.

She immediately wrote back to that woman, apologizing for her full schedule and recommending her Giggle's services.

She spend the rest of the afternoon on her bed. She just stepped outside of her room to have dinner. Supper, just like this last few days, was pretty much silent. Her parents tried to talk with each one of the older sisters, asking about their days, but no one wanted to talk, and they were tactful enough to not pressed them. They didn't want any new fight or outburst. One by one, they all finished their meals and left the table, going to their rooms. Luan was the first one to get up, and went straight to her bed.

It was half past eight. Luna would come any moment now, would play with her guitar until nine o' clock, she would lie on her bed and twenty minutes later she'd be asleep. She needed to wait just one hour. An hour that would feel like an eternity, and during which her worst thoughts would take the best of her.

Luna entered their room about ten minutes after Luan. As soon as she closed the door behind her, she let out a big sigh and leaned against the wall, closing her eyes and pressing a hand against her chest, in the place where her heart was. Luan was lying on her bed looking at the wall, but she could still see Luna out of the corner of her eyes. She knew Luna and the rest of the girls who knew Lincoln's condition were suffering it just as bad as she was. She knew that they were all pretending to be fine on the outside. But in the privacy of their own rooms, where their little sisters couldn't see them, they all allowed themselves to break up, to let the pain take the best of them. Pretending that it was all good consumed too much energy. They had to repress so many tears, they had to hide too many emotions.

Luan had an easy way out. As long as she was wearing her mime makeup, none of her sisters would be wondering why she wasn't speaking, or why she was looking so sad. They'd believe it was all part of her performance. In fact, they'd probably be grateful, for they no longer had to bear with her puns. She pictured the twins, talking in their room about Luan's sudden silence.

"Why do you think she's acting so weird?" Might ask Lana.

"Who knows? Maybe it's some dumb mime contest" Lola would answer her, uninterested.

"At least we don't hear her bad jokes all the time now!"

"Ugh, totally. It was time for her to shut up."

And they'd both be laughing with relief. When they were little, the twins enjoyed her jokes a lot. They used to found her puns pretty clever, really entertaining. Luan started reminiscing about those times when her family still enjoyed her jokes. She could remember all her younger siblings cracking up, her older sisters trying to hide their laughs. But mostly, she was thinking about Lincoln. Him, the one for whom she had started her way into comedy in the first place. Her only brother, her shining little star.

Luna turned off the lights on the room. She took her guitar and sat in a chair next to the window. Luan was still looking at the wall, but she could picture her sister's silhouette being lit by the light coming from the street. When she started to hear her playing some chords, Luan closed her eyes. Luna was her closest sister, she loved her and while she wasn't really fond with music, she loved hearing Luna playing her guitar or any other instrument. She was her number one fan, and any melody played by Luna was a melody Luan enjoyed. So as the music started playing and her sister started singing, Luan tried to stop thinking about anything else.

I know it's late but something's on my mindIt couldn't wait, there's never any time'Cause life slips by without a warningAnd I'm tired of ignoringAll the space that's between you and I

When Luna started playing ballads made by a Canadian rock band, it was safe to assume that something inside of her was falling apart. Luan noticed the feelings with which Luna was singing, she pain with which those words were leaving her mouth. She could also feel the subtle difference in her strumming. She wasn't energetically hitting the strings, she was instead letting her hand fall down by her own weight, slowly moving her fingers to play her favorite instrument. She was making mistakes, messing up the rhythm at different parts, having to take small but perceptible fractions of seconds to make it right again. It wasn't common for her to make that kind of mistakes, and it was terrible for Luan to hear her like that. To know that her sister was hiding her pain behind those songs, trying to keep it cool.

Because even if it was a slow, sad song, Luan knew very well that Luna was holding her emotions back. If she really wanted to cry, if she was really looking for a catharsis, then she had the songs to do it. The music she'd been playing these last few days were just a facade. A masquerade to disguise her pain.

She wanted to stand up, embrace Luna and cry along with her. To use her shoulder as a place to let her pain flow through and out of her in the form of tears. To take that weight off her shoulders. But she didn't do it. She kept staring at the wall, trying to not think, to silence that annoying cricket in her head that was telling her that she didn't have to suffer alone, that her night escapades were just making her feel more miserable. She tried to shut it by focusing on what her sister was still singing.

Let's dance around this bedroomLike we've only got tonightNot about to let youGo until the morning lightYou can be my whole worldIf I can be your satellite

When she played the wrong chord at the end of the chorus, she stopped her strumming. Luan waited for her to resume playing the song, but she could only hear Luna's sobs.

"I can't do it… Why can't I do it?" Luna depressively wondered, in a whisper so low that Luan could only catch it because the house was exceptionally silent.

She knew what she was feeling. She was having trouble playing her guitar. It was practically an extension of her body, and not being able to control your own body was a horrible sensation that Luan was starting to get familiar with. After all, she had lost the ability to control those damn seventeen muscles…

"I can't do it anymore… I can't..."

Luan heard her sister grabbing her guitar again, and Luna started playing some new chords, this time more slowly.

Now I can't sing a love songLike the way it's meant to beWell, I guess I'm not that good anymoreBut, baby, that's just meYeah I, will love you, baby

She raised her voice to sing, and Luan heard the heartrending sound of a voice trying to remain normal but staggering with the unmistakable effort of trying to stifle a sob. A detune that did not hurt the ear, but the heart.

AlwaysI'll be there, till the stars don't shine'Til the heavens burst and the words don't rhymeI know when I die you'll be on my mindAnd I'll love you, always

That last word could barely be understood, since Luna finally broke down and started to cry in silence, letting her guitar fall to the floor, not worried about any scratch it might cause on her favorite instrument. Luan understood her. Nothing really matter anymore, it was all worthless, she could feel it too. She suddenly didn't care about her prank toys, her fake spiders, Mr Coconuts. She could sell it all, she could lose it all, and it wouldn't affect her in any way. There was only one thing right now she wouldn't trade for anything… Except, of course, for her little brother's life. A treasure that was the reason behind her insomnia, the reason why she was waiting for Luna to fall asleep. It was her only gateway in this perverted situation they were all into, the only reason she hadn't fall into madness yet.

For some solid fifteen minutes, the room remained in the dark, with only Luna's soft whimpering interrupting the monotony of the silence. Finally, she hear the wardrobe door being opened, and her older sister dressing into her pajama. She heard her footsteps getting near their bunks, but instead of going up her own, Luna knelt down right next to Luan's.

"Luan, please, talk to me" she asked in a whisper.

Luan continued staring at the plaster of the wall.

"You're not the only one that's torn apart, sis. I'm falling to pieces too. And seeing… To see you like this… This ain't you. This silence, this… This apathy… I'm losing my little brother" Luna finally said, and both her body and voice trembled while she said so, and her eyes started shedding tears over her sister's bed. "I can't lose you too. Please. I-I could… I couldn't stand it."

She felt a hand on her shoulder, pleading her to turn around. She was asking for a hug, a shoulder to cry upon. And maybe she could give her that. But she was also asking her to be the same as always, to be the one that she was before all of this started, and that she couldn't do. She placed her hand upon her sister's, gently squeezing it. Luna looked up, finally getting a reaction from Luan for the first time since that fateful Monday, three days prior. But when she gently pushed her hand away from her, and moved closer to the wall, the wannabe rock star felt a new emptiness in her stomach.

"I get you" she whispered, hurt by seeing her sister like that. "I understand that this is your way of dealing with the pain. Just… Just know that when you need me, I'll be there for you."

She carefully jumped to her bunk bed. Luan heard the springs on the mattress, adjusting to the new weight. For some seconds, nobody said anything. Then Luna spoke once again, and by her tone and rhythm, Luan knew that she was quoting a new song.

"No more worries, rest your head and go to sleep. Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream."

She wished she could believe it.

A new nightmare woke Lincoln up near midnight.

Sitting on his bed, with sweat running down her forehead, he quickly placed a hand over his heart, trying to ease it. It was beating so fast, one part of him was terrified that it was because it was about to fail and kill him. He sat there, almost sure that any moment from now his sight would be misted, his body would stop answering and he would fall face down to the floor, seeing the light at the end of the tunnel while a choir of angels escort him beyond there. But nothing happened, and when his brain finally woke up, he realize that his heart was beating so fast only due to that nightmare that had awoken him.

He laid his head on his pillow and tried to took a deep breath. He tried to keep it cool, but he started sobbing, feeling like he was about to cry. Every night was worse than the previous one. During the day, he managed to keep himself busy, doing all sort of things that kept him from thinking in all the things he was going through at the moment. For example, that Thursday had been one of the most interesting days he could remember ever living.

It started off with that fateful breakfast that was his first misstep in his Operation Farewell. Lynn and Luna having a fight with their parents, Lola and Lana fighting each other for practically nothing, Lori and Leni trying to cheer him up with no success… After that, though, he spent the whole morning along with his mother, both of the trying to come up with something like a book.

To call it a novel would be exaggerated. It was some kind of… memories. Comments from Lincoln about how was it like to be in a family like his. They had managed to write three chapters, each one of them focused on a different aspect that came along with living with ten siblings. Each one of them had a title that, Lincoln thought, was both pretty clever and a great summary: "Space Invaders", "Hand Me Downers" and "A Tale of Two Tables". They all started with some variant of the phrase "In a family as big as mine...", and Lincoln always tried lo leave some kind of moral at the end, some review about what he'd learned from his personal experience and thanks to his sisters. It might've been a nice and trouble-less morning, had it not been for the fact that they had to stop for a while every twenty minutes or so, when his mother started to cry, and Lincoln could only stay there, hugging her, trying to calm her down, and every once in a while, crying along with her.

After lunch, he gone straight to Ronnie Anne's house, trying to fix things with her. He got there early and was received by Bobby, who had just arrived from High School. When Ronnie Anne got home, things soon got tense, and he ran away after she yelled at him and slapped him hard on his face. But his afternoon didn't end there: a little after that, Ronnie Anne went to see him (after Bobby broke his promise and told her about Lincoln's condition) and she had a fist fight with Lynn. The sound of his sisters screaming had alerted Lincoln that something was going on, so he went downstairs to see what was happening, just in time to see his sister and his friend going hard at each other. He managed to ease Lynn just in time to keep her from seriously hurting Ronnie Anne. When he separated them, he felt that Lynn was mad at him for some reason. He knew that there was something bothering her, but Ronnie Anne was wounded, on the ground, and he took her to his room.

He spend the rest of the day right there, lying on his bed with Ronnie Anne. For almost two hours, he just embraced her. He hugged her tight while she cried. There was no point in telling her not to cry, he knew that it was asking too much. In these last few days he'd learned that people who loved him would inevitably cry for him, they'd be mourning for his loss. There was nothing he could do to keep them from that pain. All he could do was to try and prepare some kind of consolation, to leave them enough memories to remember him, and to help them find, between all that sorrow, an ounce of hope, the sensation that not everything was lost. That he was still there with them. It wasn't just to help his loved ones to be a little less sad: if he succeded, Lincoln could also end his fear of having achieved nothing during his life, he could die knowing that at least his time on this world had not been in vain.

When Ronnie Anne stopped crying (mostly due to the fact that she had ran out of tears), they started a whispering conversation that lasted hours. Ronnie Anne apologized in every single way that both English and Spanish offered her. She said she was sorry over and over and over and over again. She was sorry for not having listened to him, for nos paying him attention, for being a fool, for assuming the worst, for not having believed him. And he forgave her everytime. He forgave her for everything, letting her know that none of it mattered, but his forgiveness didn't seem to be enough to help her ease her conscience. She started to speak, telling him everything she had been keeping for herself all this time. She told him about all his fears. All her insecurities. She explained with passion and full of details everything that she thought about him and their relationship, making him blush more than once. He also told her everything he liked about her, and they spend hours getting to really know each other, knowing that facet that they tried to conceal from everybody else, those secret thoughts they kept for themselves.

The emotional wearing from that afternoon was so bad that, after Ronnie Anne left his house, he had supper and then he immediately headed to his bed. He tried to sleep, but in the solitude of his room, with nothing to distract him and nothing to keep his mind occupied with, his thoughts were unbearable. He just couldn't think about nice things. He couldn't put his mind blank. Everytime he closed his eyes, he started to think about what was about to come, and that kept him awake.

Right then, after his nightmare, he knew that it would be almost impossible to fall asleep right away. Not only because he was agitated and covered in sweat, but also because his mind was starting to think about all the things he wanted to forget. Resigning himself to another damn restless night, he figured he could at least go take a shower and clean himself a little.

He took his towel, some fresh clothes and he stepped out of his room. As soon as he entered the dark hall, he notices a dim light that was coming from beneath Lisa and Lily's bedroom door. He curiously went to check where was that light coming from, and quietly opened the door.

"Lisa?" He softly called, poking his head inside the room. "Are you awake?"

He didn't want to wake Lily up. She was sleeping quietly in her cradle. His attention went automatically to the computer screen, the source of the light. He then checked Lisa's bed, empty and unused, without a four years old girl sleeping there. Worried, he looked around the room, until his eyes finally saw a figure in the dark. It was Lisa, lying on the floor, still with her day clothes and using an open book like a pillow. Lincoln sighed and dropped his stuff on the floor. As he was approaching his little sister, he looked at the computer again.

SYNTHESIZING ENZYME: 62% COMPLETED

He stopped on his tracks. Synthesizing? He had read too many comics to not recognize that term. Could it be that…? No. No, he couldn't allow himself to even think that. He should have no hope. He was going to… It was happening. He had to accept it.

Being extremely careful, he lifted his younger sister. She moved slightly in her sleep, but he cradled her on his arms and shoosh'd her. It worked. She stopped moving and snuggled herself in his arms with a smile. Lincoln went to her bed and sat on it. Very delicately, he removed her glasses and put them in the nightstand. He also took her sweater, leaving it in a chair nearby. He laid her on her bed and tucked her in. Lisa mumbled something about the properties of magnesium, but she remained sleeping.

Lincoln remained in her room for some minutes, staring at Lisa. He stroked her hair, trying to not wake her up. She had tried to keep herself asleep, probably doing some researches and trying to find a cure for him. He'd decided to let her work on it, because he knew that Lisa wouldn't be able to live with it if he denied her that opportunity. But if she couldn't cure him… He didn't want to imagine her reaction.

Wishing to end this night as soon as possible, he took his stuff again and went straight to the bathroom, looking forward to a hot shower.

After a ten minutes shower, Lincoln was walking his way back to his room, hoping to be able to catch some more Z's that night. But when he walked past the stairs, he thought he'd heard a noise. He stopped there and looked downstairs. Everything seemed normal, but he was definitely hearing something. It looked like voices, but the sound was too low for him to understand it. Maybe it was his parents. But what were they doing awake at this hours?

He could've ignored it, headed straight to his room, lay there and forget about everything, but the tumors that were killing him had granted him an ADHD. So he started to climb down one step at a time, trying to make zero noise so he wouldn't be alerting his parents or whoever was there. It was a hard task, considering the pathetic state of the wood steps, but he was a master of stealth. He finally reached the entry hall, feeling like a ninja. Now that he was there, he could see that the TV was on, and someone was sitting in the couch, with a blanket covering her.

It wasn't his parents, so it had to be one of his sisters. He was about to call her, just to see who she was, but he decided to not let her know he was there. Yet. Knowing that the carpet would muffle the sounds of his steps, he walked glued to the wall, trying to get behind the couch. When he got a little closer, the TV light illumined a big brown ponytail.

Luan.

Lincoln stopped in his place. Since her last visit to the hospital, Luan hadn't spoke with him. As far as he knew, actually, she hadn't spoken with anyone. Their only words so far had been a rough accusation delivered at Lynn, from which the sporty girl seemed to still resent. He saw her wearing her mime makeup all day long. From all his sisters, she and Lynn were the only ones whom he hadn't spend any time so far. He'd found some moments to talk with Lori and Leni. Luna would knock on his door to see how he was doing, although she didn't stay for long. His younger sisters were still trying to play with him and asking him to intervene in any argument, as always. But his two immediately older sisters seemed decided to avoid him. Lynn was doing it actively, keeping her distance and asking him to leave her alone. But Luan… She was simply gone.

He stifled a sigh so she wouldn't hear her. He had to speak with her. He had his theory about what was going on with her, and he knew what he could say to make her feel better. It was the perfect opportunity: no one could bother them, they had the living room all for themselves, they could have a private chat. It was a good thing that she'd stayed awake doing… What was she doing?

He finally looked at the screen and was kindly surprised at what he saw. He was watching himself, a couple of years younger, wearing a cowboy costume, running on the backyard of his house, chasing Lynn and Luna, both of them dressed like Indians. They were making some Sioux war cries as they ran around the tree, with their plastic tomahawks in the air and the feathers on their hairs moving with the wind. Lincoln had a toy gun in one hand, and a lasso in the other. He was making gunshot noises and was constantly throwing his lasso at his sisters, hoping to catch them, but the two of them were moving gracefully, avoiding him while laughing. He was laughing too. He looked adorable.

Lincoln remembered those days. He was nine years old at the time. His father had finally bought him the cowboy costume he so desperately wanted, and just so his sisters wouldn't get jealous and they could all play together, their mother had prepared them some indians costumes for all of them. They spend months playing cowboy vs indians, until they eventually got tired of the game.

"We need backup!" Yelled Luna on the video, raising her tomahawk like she was making a summoning.

Appearing out of nowhere, Lola and Lana tackled Lincoln from behind, taking him to the ground with them.

"We got him, we got him!" Yelled both twins, seizing Lincoln's arms as he tried no escape.

"Let me go, you savages!" He complained, although with a smile on his face.

Lynn and Luna soon went to help their little allies, and the four of them soon managed to tie Lincoln with his own lasso.

"He's ours now!" Yelled Lana, victoriously. All the girls starting making the ritual dance of victory, which consisted in them moving around Lincoln doing little jumps and raising their arms on the air.

"Get away!" He complained, trying to free himself from his own rope. "Stay away! You'll give me girl cooties!"

All his sisters froze in their place.

"You have nine sisters, you can't be worried about girl cooties" said Lola, matter of factly.

"Oh, I think he's not worried about the cooties we can give him by touch" said Luna, with an evil grin.

"Yeah, he's worried about the cooties we can give him by hitting him!" Added Lynn, tenderly caressing her tomahawk.

"No", Luna stopped her, kneeling next to her brother's head. "There's something Little Lincoln is not immune from yet: kisses!"

And, she quickly gave him a peckon his forehead. Lincoln giggled, but he immediately closed his eyes and started to roll in his place.

"Don't do that!" He said, but he turned his head to his side, giving Luna better access to his right cheek. Luna quickly planted a kiss on his cheek, and she chuckled at his fake cries of pain.

Soon the twins took Luna's place, filling Lincoln's face with little kisses, and even Lynn did her part, while they all laughed at the way Lincoln was screaming, saying that it was burning him.

The real Lincoln, the one from the present, smiled at the sight. Sometimes he missed the innocence he had when he was a little younger. That video brought him back memories that he thought were forgotten, and he felt a nice sensation on his chest, like he had just finished drinking a cup of hot chocolate during a cold winter afternoon.

However, the warmth that filled his insides vanished as soon as he heard Luan crying. Her sobs were muffled, like she was pressing a pillow against her mouth, but she couldn't completely conceal her sounds, just like she couldn't hide how much her shoulders were shaking with each sob. Lincoln tentatively took a step forward, but then Luan stood up and went to the videocassette. She took out the tape and replaced it with a new one that she grabbed from a box that Lincoln didn't noticed until then. She sat on the couch again, not looking back, not realizing that Lincoln was there.

This tape was much more recent, and Lincoln recognized it immediately. It was a recording from one of the birthday parties where both Luan and him had performed as 'Funny Business'. The video showed Luan trying to make a joke, but then Lincoln appeared out of nowhere and slipped on a banana peel he had just thrown there a couple of seconds before. With his dumb fall, all the kids started to laugh. It was the first time that Lincoln could see Luan's face as he, acting like an immature child, was trying to steal the spotlight. She was clearly upset, she didn't like it at all.

And the real Luan, sitting on the couch, started whimpering louder, covering her face with a cushion and letting her tears fall without a worry. Lincoln could stand it no longer. He walked around the couch and sat besides his sister.

"Luan", he called her.

She jumped at both the sound of his voice and the new weight on the couch. Her whole body started to shake, and for a second, she stopped crying… and breathing. She slowly started to push down the cushion that was covering her face, revealing some hair locks that had escaped her ponytail, but most importantly, revealing a couple of eyes that broke Lincoln's heart in a thousand pieces. Not just because tears kept falling from them, but because it was painful to see those eye bags and all that tiredness.

"Luan", he repeated, not knowing what to say.

His sister's lips started to tremble, and she just put her knees against her chest, and hid her head between her arms, like she was trying to make herself as little as possible and disappear. He tried to get closer to her, but she moved to the other side of the couch. He sighed. He needed to think what to do. His eyes rested on the box full of tapes. He grabbed it and peeked inside, to see what it had. There had to be over fifty tapes, and they were all about him. "Lincoln's Birthdays", "Lincoln playing with his new kite", "Lincoln's Mischiefs vol. IV", "Lincoln singing", "Lincoln breaking stuff", "Lincoln apologizing", "Sleepy Lincoln: Adorable Edition"… He turned to see his sister, and he realized what she was doing down there this late in the night.

He took the kite video and put it on. After he hit 'play', he sat on the couch again, leaving a space between Luan and him.

The video showed a six years old Lincoln running in the park, trying to lift an orange kite in the air. There wasn't anyone else in the frame, and all they could hear was his little child giggles, having more fun than ever. He saw Luan looking up at the TV, but he didn't want to bother her yet. He waited a couple of minutes, and when she started sobbing again, that was his cue.

"Did you recorded all of this?" He slowly asked, pointing at the box full of tapes.

Without looking away from the TV, Luan nodded.

"It's a lot of tapes. Many hours of recordings" he commented.

She nodded again.

"Is that… Is that all you got of me?"

Silence. A few seconds of silence. And then:

"No."

"You have more?"

"I-I have… At least s-six more boxes", she finally admitted, in a shattered whisper.

He raised his eyebrows, impressed.

"I didn't know you had that much tapes. You have something like that for each one of us?"

Luan moved on her seat, suddenly uncomfortable, and her arms embraced her knees, holding them tightly against her torso.

"Y-You… I don't have s-so many from the r-rest of the g-girls..."

"Why?" He asked, leaning in her direction.

New tears started to fall from Luan's eyes. Her whole body was shaking as she started sobbing, trying to find her voice.

"Because I love you more, you doofus!" She finally said, keeping her eyes closed, trying to keep the tears locked there. "Because you made me who I am! Thanks to you I found my purpose!"

A small part of him felt really flattered that her sister would say something as nice as that. But it was impossible to be happy for more than a second. Seeing her crying like that, he could only feel miserable.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I didn't… I had nothing", she started to explain, but it was hard to understand what she was saying as she sobbed and breathed with her mouth. "I couldn't sing, I wasn't good at sports, I wasn't pretty… And then one day I made you laugh, and… And I… I realized I had a gift. I could make people laugh. You helped me realized it. You inspired me. And now… Now you… You're..."

She exploded in new cryings, and Lincoln wondered how could it be that their parents were not being awoken by all that commotion in the living room. He opened his mouth, but then Luan kept talking.

"You going to die! You're my little brother, and you're dying! And I… I can't go on with this! I can't make people laugh! How could I? How could I even try that, if the laugh I love the most is gone?" There was a long pause, in which she tried to keep speaking, but her whimpering didn't let her speak clearly. "I… You… You shouldn't die! Why you? Precisely you? Our only brother! It should… It should've been one of us girls!"

"LUAN!" Screamed Lincoln, not believing what he'd just heard. He didn't care if he woke up his parents, if he woke up his sisters, or if he woke up old Mr Grouse.

"I should had been me!" She continued mourning.

"Luan, shut up!" He said, standing up and walking until he was in front of his sister. "Don't say that!"

"Y-Y-You're special… You a-are… We need you..."

"I'm not any more special than any of you!"

"You're our brother, out only brother… No one else could stand us all. Lori is the only one who can control us, Leni is the kindest girl in the world, Luna, Lynn and Lucy are so talented, Lana can fix anything, Lola wins every beauty contest she's in, Lisa is a genius, Lily would probably be great at whatever she does..."

"And you're an amazing..." started Lincoln, but she didn't let him finish.

"And I'm just a joke. A jester. I can only make jokes, and be there for people to laugh at me. At me, not with me. I'm the school freak. I have no friends. I'm a loser, a useless, worthless fourteen year old girl, and if someone in this family should die, then it shoud've been..."

It sounded worse than it actually was. The echo resonated in the living room walls, but Lincoln was sure that his little slap hadn't caused any real pain to Luan. He just wanted her to shut up, and he made it. She was looking at him startled, with a mixture of surprise and a little fear in her face.

"Luan, I don't want to hear you saying that ever again" said Lincoln, calmly but sternly. Since he was standing in front of her and she was sitting, they were eye-level with each other, so he gently put his hand on her cheeks, slowly caressing them, using his thumbs to wipe her tears. "I don't want you to believe any of those things you just said."

She opened her mouth, but the words wouldn't come out. He continued speaking.

"You're wrong, you're absolutely wrong if you believe that you're just some kind of… walking joke, or something like that. You're much more than that. You're a girl who never gives up. When you have a goal, say, like pranking someone, you won't stop until you get what you want. You've won more trophies than a normal person could ever dream of having. You say you're not talented? You surely master over fifteen disciplines! You can juggle, you can ride a unicycle, you're a ventriloquist, you're a great mime, you're a great stand up comedian… I mean, you even have engineering capabilities to prepare your most advanced pranks!"

"B-But..."

"Not only that. With only fourteen years old, you earn more money than many teenagers with half-time jobs. Your Funny Business is a success in the own, and your YouTube channel has over fifty thousands followers."

"That doesn't..."

"But most importantly", he interrupted her again, "you're my sister. My big sister. And every single time I have ever needed you, everytime I was feeling bad, sad, sick or worried, you've been there for me. You always cheered me up, and you always made me smile when I needed it the most. That's exactly why I love you… why we all love you. Because you're much more than a jester. You're happiness. You're joy. Some say laugh is the best medicine, and you're our best doctor. You should never stop laughing. Never stop bringing joy wherever you go."

Luan kept crying, her eyes unable to see anything else but Lincoln. He tried to keep his composure, to look determined so there wasn't any doubt that he was being completely honest. He truly believed every word he said, he wasn't just trying to make her feel better, and he wanted her to know that. He tried to keep himself serious and determined, but the corner of his eyes were itching, and he had to start blinking rapidly to keep himself from crying along with his sister.

Luan's arms let go her legs and she tentatively draw them close to Lincoln. They stopped mere inches from him, like she was afraid to hurt him if she touched him. He just smiled and caressed he cheek where he had weakly slapped her. After that gesture, she lost any restrain. Her arms surrounded Lincoln and pulled him closer. She sat him in her lap and embraced him with all her might and started to cry, louder than ever, letting her head rest upon his. Her right hand was gently stroking his white hair.

Lincoln let his emotions get the best of him. He wrapped his arms around her (which was actually really difficult to do, since he was facing her sideways and he could barely move between her loving arms) and allowed the tears to finally leave his eyes.

"I'm sorry", Luan cried. "These days… I've been avoiding you because… because I didn't want the girls to see me cry, and I… I can't… Everytime I see you..."

"It's okay… It's okay" he assured her, wiping his tears with her blouse. "I should've talked with you sooner. I had no idea you… you thought all those things about yourself. I should've seen it before, I could've..."

"Stop it", she said, holding her tighter against her. "Stop blaming yourself for everything. You didn't do anything wrong. You… You're..."

She couldn't finish the phrase. She just kept embracing him, caressing him, loving him. And the message was delivered.

"Lincoln..." she started, trying to find the right words to express herself. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so, really sorry for everything I've done to you."

"What are you…?"

"My pranks" she said, painfully sobbing. "I've crossed the line too many times. I've embarrassed you, I've made you feel bad, I've… For crying out loud, I've hurt you!"

"Luan, you don't have to..."

"I always thought it was funny" she interrupted him again, "but now… Now you're… You're going to d-die… and I can't stop thinking that the only thing I've done with you for the last couple of years was trying to prank you. I mean, not only you, the whole family, but you… You're… and I can't fix that. I can undo all these years, I won't… I'll never have that!"

She pointed at the TV, and Lincoln turned to see what she was talking about. It was still the kite tape, but Lincoln wasn't alone anymore. Leni and Lori were with him. Lori was running with him on her shoulders as he tried to raise the kite, and Leni was running under it, saying words of encourage to the kite, telling it that if he wanted, he could reach the moon. The three of them were smiling and laughing, without any worry in the world.

"I don't have this kind of moments with you" Luan said, going back to her full crying mode. "I was always the one recording. I have dozens of tapes about you having fun with all our sisters. But not even one with me. And I… All I ever did was bother you and our sisters with my stupid puns, making you hate me, and… and… I don't what to do..."

Lincoln listened to her carefully. He knew that she was telling him some of her worst fears, the things she felt and that she was always trying to keep from them, so he let her take those things out of her chest, he let her speak her mind. But she was wrong, she was terribly wrong, and he couldn't let her believe those things.

"Luan, we don't hate you. And you don't bother us, how could you even think that?" He said, turning his head so he could stare at her in the eyes. "You could never bother us. Like I said, we all love you. It's just..."

When she heard that 'it's just', Luan hold her breath, and her eyes, blurred behind the tears, were staring at him with fear, preparing for the worst. That scared him, but it also gave him the courage he needed to cheer her up. He hate to look in her sister's eyes and see even an ounce of pain. He loved her, and he would do anything to make her smile.

"It's just that we've gotten used to you. You have made us laugh so many times, for so many years, that not only you've raised the bar, you have us already used to you coming up with a pun or cracking a joke at any moment. We've kinda lost out ability to be surprised by your comedy. I mean, think about your YouTube channel: fifty thousands people watch your videos and have fun doing it. And what about your Funny Business performances, even the adults laugh! That's because you are funny, you're very funny. You don't generate that effect on us because we already know how awesome you are at coming up with a new pun, so we're not surprised anymore. Think about the rest of our family, no one bats an eye when Lynn comes home with a new first place trophy, or when Lola wins a new contest. You see what I mean?"

Luan slowly nodded, and tried to divert her gaze to the floor, but Lincoln didn't let her.

"Luan… Maybe… Maybe it'll be good for you if you… if you, kinda, you know, cut us some slack with your jokes and pranks" he said, trying to sound kind.

"Y-Yeah.." she said, with only a string of voice. "I… I promise I won't do any more..."

"No" he suddenly told her, "I didn't mean that. Never stop being funny and making jokes, it's what you like, and no one can ask you to stop doing the things you love. What I'm trying to say is… Every once in a while, you should leave your pranks aside, and you should try to spend more time with our family. But not as Luan "Out" Loud, the great comedian. I mean as Luan, my funny, caring, beautiful big sister. The one we all love."

She let out a moan and once again embraced her little brother.

"Gosh, I love you so much" she told him.

"I love me too."

Slowly, Lincoln looked up, smiling at Luan. His sister's face was priceless. Even with the tears in her cheeks, that look of utter surprise was wonderful to Lincoln's eyes. For a couple of seconds, it was like Luan's mind was working hard, trying to figure out if she'd heard well. Had her brother just cracked a joke? In such an intimate moment?

"Get it?" He smirked, provocatively.

She stared at him for a few seconds, and finally, her face remembered how to smile. She let out a little chuckle, trapped in the middle of her crying. He started to giggle too, happy for seeing his sister smiling once again. Both of them kept laughing for a while, until she calmed down. She was still crying, but Lincoln had the impression they were no longer tears of sadness. They were tears of happiness.

"I definitely love you, Lincoln", she said, catching her breath.

"And I love you. Definitely."

"Can…? Would you sleep here? Bunk in the couch with me?" She asked, blushing a little. She hadn't slept in the same bed as Lincoln in years.

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be right now."

She lied down on the couch, and Lincoln lied in front of her, in fetal position, letting his sister wrap her arms around his chest. After they put the blanket over them, Lincoln felt her hand looking for his. He placed his hand over hers and softly squeezed it. Feeling his sister's breathing on his head, he sighed out all his worries for the moment.

He thought of telling her about some of his projects for Operation Farewell, mainly the ones where she was involved. One of those ideas was extremely important, and would require them working together as soon as possible. But Lincoln, oddly enough, found himself with the nice feeling of not wanting to think to much.

Embraced by his sister, he let his body relax, and in a few minutes he entered a peaceful dream.

There were no more nightmares that night.

.

I'd like to say that what you've just read it's not all there is to tell about Luan. Every sister will have her own chapter, but their development it's not limited to what happens in said chapters only. This chapter let us have an introspective look inside Luan's character. We learned about her motivations and a little about how her mind works. Lincoln has managed to calm her a little, but this doesn't mean that from now on she'll be the same Luan we all know, the one she was before this incident. There are a lot of things that she'll have to learn before this story ends.

Next chapter will be focused on a sister whose hair's not blonde. Five options, then. I'll try to have it as soon as possible, obviously, but I don't think I'll be able to keep my promise of a chapter once a week. As you can see, these chapters are really long. If I was just doing the spanish version, then I could have one chapter every week, but translating them it's taking me longer and longer as the chapters become more complex and long. I don't know if I've been improving or if I'm actually making more mistakes, but it's getting harder everytime, haha. Not only that, but it's also pretty exhausting to keep up with this rate.

I don't know, some people can write great chapters in very shorts amount of time. I guess I may need a little longer. But don't worry, I don't think I'll ever need more than 2 ½ weeks for a new chapter.

I think I'll write a Christmas One-Shot too. I'll let you know. And… Oh, yes. I think I should let you know we're about 55%-60% done with this story. Expect about 10 more chapters, give or take a couple.

Again, thank you all. This story is for you. See you later!