56 Reason

If that were not the case, I wouldn't have been able to save him; Hell, I wouldn't even have been able to approach him.

The reason Hikari, despite being much weaker, was despairing about not being able to help Hiiro when it was clearly impossible for her was, well, quite complicated.

It struck at the very core of her resolve and determination to grow stronger and protect her master. When the situation arose, she had no choice but to watch from afar due to her own weakness.

However, it's important to clarify that her decision to watch from a distance was actually appreciated, especially given the circumstances. She sensed that Hiiro needed time for himself, and she understood that she might not be the person he wanted to talk to right now, given the atmosphere surrounding him.

Monsters like her were very keenly sensitive to such atmospheres. Thus, she had no way of knowing what was happening with Hiiro.

Had she recklessly attempted to awaken him from his trance by risking her life, it might have not only made Hiiro even sadder if she had been hurt in the process, but also, more importantly, it could have escalated the situation, potentially pushing Hiiro into a berserk state and breaking his mind.

However, despite the rationality behind her actions, the truth was that she wouldn't feel fine hearing all of this.

Because at the end of the day, It was true that she had failed.

Her vows to protect him in every step of his journey, now broken.

She was like a loyal knight who just failed her mission.

But, while it was true, she had been unable to protect him, it wasn't necessarily her sole task and neither was she strong enough to accomplish it.

What she needed was a harsh awakening to the fact that she wasn't the only person taking care of Hiiro. While he had saved her and she loved him dearly, she had to understand that she couldn't do everything by herself.

She needed to understand her limitations and work around it rather falling in despair just because something didn't go according to her expectations.

I observed her for a while before speaking, and this time, I wasn't going to mince my words.

"...Hey, Hikari, how long are you going to keep acting this way? I've had enough of it."

Hikari, clearly surprised by my sudden and harsh tone, looked at me and began to speak.

"I'm sorry. I'm not sure if I unders-"

But before she could finish her sentence, I interrupted her.

"I meant this self-deprecating act of yours."

"...."

She didn't say anything this time, clearly aware of what I was getting at.

But I wasn't done, this might be harsh but I needed to do this.

"You are acting like Hiiro is dead."

"...That's not it. I was-"

She finally looks at me, Her eyes visibly shaken, she denied my words.

"What is it, then? Are you feeling guilty that you were unable to do anything there? Is that it?"

"..."

Her reaction told me that I'd hit the mark, but I already knew that much. I wasn't done with my words though. 

"Really? Then, tell me. Let's assume you had known about his condition, then what, huh? What could you have done? Do you honestly believe that you would have been able to move in the aura he was exuding without losing your life? Don't be naive."

It was true. The chances were quite high, although I couldn't help but exaggerate a bit. I was trying to wake her up, after all.

"I can't bear to watch this pitiful act any longer. So, let me tell you the truth, Hikari. Yes, you must love Hiiro dearly, and I'm not denying it because that kid loves everyone just as much, even if he doesn't show it. So, I cannot blame you for trying to do everything, to help him but you need to know your place. You are weak."

Hikari looked down once again, unable to look at me, as the harsh reality of her limitations sunk in.

"..."

She was going through all kinds of emotions, truly in shock at my sudden harsh words.

"And the weak don't get to wallow in self-pity or any of those emotions for that matter. Do you understand?"