Cat and mouse

Like most structures, the police department was designed to Gotham's high architectural standards.

The gloomy four-story gabled building looked incredibly monumental, due to its almost square shape, and it was quite tall, since it had standard six-meter ceilings. The narrow, upward-pointing windows made it look a bit like an old fort. A strong fence of thick reinforced concrete slabs around the perimeter also added to the resemblance.

On the façade of the site, steel pins were attached to a large figure of an eagle holding a gilded shield in its talons.

"Oracle, why does the shield depict the city against the backdrop of an explosion?" I asked thoughtfully, looking at the drawing from a monorail pylon near the police department.

"It's the city against the dawn," the older man corrected me, "though your interpretation makes sense, given the events that are happening now. There's another clash west of Blackport, and you should hurry.

"Got it," I push off the support and spread my cloak in a fall.

My vantage point was a little lower than the roof of the building, so I had to use bat-alcohol to climb up to the spotlighted area where Gordon was waiting with a mug of coffee in his hands, escaping the cold. Occasionally he would start chattering into his radio, giving orders to his subordinates, who were scurrying around the city in soap, trying to stabilize the situation.

"Hello, Jim," I said grimly, trying to copy Bats' intonation.

"Batman!" The commissioner turned around abruptly, spilling some coffee from his cup. - You're alive!

Was it just me, or was he about to throw his arms around me? I began to frantically think of options for a pathos retreat, but, fortunately, the man successfully suppressed the first impulse, deciding to limit himself to a joyful smile, which made him look as if he'd lost a dozen years. Hmm, Mouse's father actually looks pretty good. The bags under his eyes are not so big, and the gray hair on his temples has clearly become less, since our last meeting...

"Did you think it could be otherwise?

"Don't use complex designs," prompted Oracle, who was watching the warm meeting through cameras built into his mask.

"You've been gone for days, and now crime is at an all-time high. What else would I have thought?

"Been busy. What's the situation in town?

"Things are very bad. Informants report that the two families have called a temporary truce until the perpetrator of the attacks is found. My men are doing their best, but the number of skirmishes between the mob and the clown gangs is increasing by the hour. West of Blackport, where the Joker was rumored to have been last seen, is being combed by the Falcone family, so the patrols are not going there yet," the commissioner poured out all the latest information.

Fucking hell... The impotence of the police is starting to seriously stress me out. Let's say the mafia is really dangerous to touch, because for their own they can in theory take revenge, although this issue can be solved by mass raids and blocking accounts, but the same yesterday's painted criminals could really be tied up by special forces, and not wait until the trio of incomparable heroes beat back the station.

The radio on Gordon's chest beeped, and he was distracted for a moment, taking another report from a subordinate. It was the perfect time for a flashy disappearance, because I'd accomplished my goal by showing my face to Jim.

I jump backwards from my seat, arching my back in a bridge and using my hands to secure my cloak to get past the fence. After flying a couple of meters, I shoot out a bat claw, clinging to the far edge of the roof, and after swinging, I start to plan towards the alley where the batcycle was left.

What can I say, but a specialized gadget is much better suited for such movements than my cane, because you can use it as much as you want, just change the squibs. And its coil is almost twice as powerful, so you can practically shoot yourself into the air while gaining altitude.

"How are Sailor and Mouse doing?" I asked, saddling the two-wheeler.

"They managed to save one police patrol and tie up five criminals.

"Fine, let them keep it up, and I'll head toward Blackport.

"Planning on stopping the mob?

"No, I plan on checking out the rumors about the Joker's reappearance and crime reduction. I need everyone to realize that Bats is back on the force.

"Okay, I'll make the best route," Alfred responded, displaying a crime map on his mask lens.

With a bit of slippage, the batcycle takes off, following to the first point.

On the spot, it turned out that a trio of idiots had decided to blow up the ATM by stuffing a low-powered explosive inside. I arrived in time, successfully preventing the explosion and disarming the painted idiots, who turned out to be unrelated to the clown gang, but simply decided to take advantage of the hype.

They had not chosen the most successful disguise, because first I beat them up, especially the leader, in the hope of finding out where the main character was. That's when it turned out that I was mistaken, but I couldn't explain it to my broken fingers during the interrogation. At the same time, now everyone would know for sure that Batman was protecting the city again, though I wasn't going to stop at that, or no one would take the words of a trio of petty criminals seriously.

Leaving the securely bound men to wait for the patrolmen who had been called in, I moved on, gradually getting closer to Blackport.

***

Squeaky... The city was feverish until practically four in the morning. Huh, almost a full eight-hour workday filled with superhero activity. During that time, I managed to personally disarm thirty-two gangsters and five mobsters acting too brazenly, and that's considering that I was just trying to track down the last patient of a doctor named Michael Nicholson, who was the mastermind behind the mess.

According to eyewitnesses, this Strange miscarriage thought he was a jolly joker, preparing Gotham for some great holiday, and for this purpose he gave various weapons to the bandits who joined him, so that they "added bright colors to this dull town". Luckily, he couldn't get anything serious (or left all the goodies for himself), so the minions I encountered mostly used ordinary pistols swiped from the armory of the Blackport police station, and cold weapons painted in red and green holiday colors.

And now the worst part was, I couldn't catch up with him. That freak with the leaky roof from the experiments reminded me of an elusive ghost. No matter how hard I hurried, he managed to slip away every time, until his trail finally ended on the west side of Burnley Island.

It's kind of mystical. You arrive at the warehouse, where just five minutes ago Michael was campaigning to join the ranks of fucking clowns, and all you find are a couple of criminals who didn't make it out in time, or disfigured mafia corpses whose faces have clearly been exposed to strong acid. Note for the future, it's better not to get into close combat with the last patient, of course, unless I suddenly want to test the limits of regeneration.

While I was unsuccessfully trying to follow the trail, my favorites were not bored, purposefully hunting for bandits, so their score was twice as much as mine. The gap didn't seem that big, but it was worth considering that two hours after Batman appeared on the streets, the number of crimes went down sharply, and even Falcone and Maroni's men were somehow quiet, suddenly turning into an analog of a people's militia.

Eh, as much as I try to deny it, the Grim Mouse really is some kind of symbol that keeps criminals from finally getting loose.

I shook my head frustratedly, realizing the depth of the asshole the city was in with its idiotic politics, when some fake man with a spoiled childhood turned out to be scarier than the machine of justice, and headed towards the diamond district. If I couldn't catch the mad doctor's patient, I should at least try to prepare for Grundy's appearance, since there were only four days left before the eclipse.

The rooftop of a skyscraper across from the penthouse I was looking at was a great view of Gotham at night. The city was mesmerizing in its dark, predatory beauty. Should I call the girls for a walk later, now that the criminals were quiet?

I'd left the spider drone in the alley by the building before the climb, and now I was using my laptop to control the eight-legged mechanism, making it climb the steep wall. In fact, I could have thrown it on the roof of Alastor's house, but I wanted to test the drone in the field while I had the chance.

"Oracle, are you sure nothing will happen to this thing in four days?

"Absolutely," the older man replied without a shadow of a doubt. - But I would advise you to hide the drone near one of the gargoyles on the twentieth floor, not on the roof of the building, as you had originally planned. The weather forecasters promise a thunderstorm the day after tomorrow, and the device is unlikely to survive a lightning strike.

"I see," I directed the spider to the nearest stone sculpture to find a convenient place. I'll place the included repeater as well.

Deftly moving its metal legs, the drone quickly reached the statue, where it installed a metal pin. Great, now it would be possible to control the device from the other side of the world via local systems. Hmm, or should I send Babs down here to supervise? Yeah, it wouldn't hurt to have a backup, and then Mouse wouldn't be able to get to Grundy if she was busy with something important.

"Someone is trying to take you by surprise," my thoughts were interrupted by Alfred's tense voice.

The mask's lenses turned on at once, marking the approximate location of the enemy. The unknown enemy was literally five meters behind me, and if it wasn't for my helmet, which was packed with electronics, I could have missed the attack.

As I continued to steer the drone as if nothing was happening, I discreetly pulled out a pair of round balls from my wristband, which exploded loudly on impact with the ground, creating a bright flash. It wasn't a stun grenade, but it was instantaneous.

~Bang! ~

I shifted to the side and threw a batarang. At the last moment, I managed to turn my hand a little, and the projectile flew into the milk, because the enemy was not quite in front of me.

"Always on guard, mur," the girl, dressed in a tight black latex bodysuit that emphasized every curve of her sexy body, removed her hand with sharp metal claws from her covered eyes, looked at me mockingly, and then licked erotically, adjusting the choker on her seductive neck.

"What are you doing here?" I duplicated Alfred's words, scrutinizing the night guest.

There was a lot to see. Catwoman sat on the ventilation duct with her leg over her leg, erotically arching her back so that her cleavage could be seen almost to her navel. In her left hand was a twisted whip, which she masterfully wielded, and on her head was a hood with cat ears and glasses with large orange lenses, which caused me persistent associations with dragonflies. The image was completed by a pretty face, which she didn't even think of hiding, and green almond-shaped eyes that glimmered mysteriously in the darkness.

From my memories of my past world she was closer to the anti-heroes as she liked to rob bad guys, but sometimes she teamed up with Bats to prevent some disaster that threatened to destroy the city, they even seemed to have a love affair. Although, knowing Bruce, I highly doubt that. So we'll put her in the neutrals for now, but keep our guard up.

"Selina Kyle, better to address her as Cat," the older man said quickly, checking the information on the batcomputer. - She is a weak metahuman. Her abilities include superior agility and coordination. She and Master have a rather complicated relationship. Last time, he stopped her from robbing the evidence room containing the confiscated jewelry from Two-Face's mansion. Try to keep your distance.

Hmm, unexpected meth info, now we have to figure out how coincidental our meeting is.

"You're just gonna keep quiet?

The pretty girl grinned and deftly jumped off the box.

"Batman, Batman, Batman, Batman," she moved closer to me, swaying her hips, "I'm a cat, I walk wherever I want.

Selina looked at the laptop screen, which I immediately slammed shut.

"And you haven't changed at all," the girl came close to me, looking intently into my eyes. - There was a rumor that you'd disappeared.

"Rumors can be deceiving," I take a step back. - So why are you here? I'll never believe you were just looking for me.

"Hmpf," she hummed, and turned away, leaning against the stone barrier, her heel erotically puffed out. - I told you, I'm just taking a walk.

I followed the direction of her gaze, which was clearly directed at the penthouse... No, no, no, no, if she pulled off a robbery, Alastor was going to have to beef up security or go somewhere else, and I wouldn't be able to get anywhere near him during the eclipse.

"You're not robbing the Winslows.

"Who's going to stop me?" She asked incredulously and slid into a handstand, hovering over the abyss.

"You. You won't. Rob them. Rob them," I said separately, trying to be even more serious.

The girl shook her head, and then walked a little way on her hands and jumped off the parapet to approach me again.

"I think someone forgot that last time they let me get away with my loot," she said with a smile.

"The only thing missing was a statue of a golden dragon, but the master said it had drowned in the pond," my invisible assistant immediately responded.

Wow, just wow. I didn't think Bats could like someone so much that he would turn a blind eye to a crime. I don't know, though. Maybe the statue really did sink. Either way, I've got to keep the Cat out of Alastor's penthouse.

"If you don't listen to me..." there was a meaningful pause.

"Oh, I'm interested in what you'll do, go on," she nodded graciously, feeling like a complete mistress of the situation.

"I'll tie you up and spank you," I said the first thing that came to mind.

No, why? It's worked perfectly twice. Maybe this method should even be patented.

There was a soft popping sound on the speaker, as if someone had performed a classy facepalm, but I think it was just a connection problem.

"Oh, I didn't realize the boy had awakened such tendencies," she gently touched the bat symbol on my chest.

Okay, Bats, you're the one who's gonna have to deal with this, especially once in a lifetime.

The girl seemed to sense something, as she tried to break the distance, but I was faster, and even stronger. I intercepted the whip she tried to swing away so I could immediately use it for its intended purpose: binding my victim. Harley's and Ivy's lessons hadn't gone to waste, so it was hard to call me a novice at the art of shibari. In a couple of minutes, Catwoman was on my lap, kicking up her heels, spewing three-story profanities out of her mouth, which only intensified as I began to fulfill my promise.

It didn't last too long, and ended when the girl assured me that she wasn't going to rob the Winslows. After a couple more spanks to reinforce the effect, I tied the hapless thief up tighter and, picking up my laptop case, headed for the edge of the roof. The repeater was already installed, so I could control the drone from home.

I could hear Selina's words at my back, trying to break free of the restraints:

"I'll make you regret it! You'll suffer for the rest of your life! Don't you dare leave me like this!

I didn't care, because the words were addressed to Gloomy Mouse, so he'd have to deal with the crazy woman. I threw a parting glance at the cat, red with anger, and stepped into the abyss, trying not to laugh out loud.